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For those of you who give lessons...

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Last activity 2016-02-03 8:03 PM
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Reg. Apr 2011
Posted 2015-12-30 10:21 AM
Subject: For those of you who give lessons...

Extreme Veteran

Posts: 306
Location: Albany, Georgia
When you give lessons, what rules do you set for them? I have a hard time with my kids being dedicated. Especially the teens??. I'm starting to realize they are a direct result of me just as a football team is to the coach and so on. IMO if I don't become more strict on them then I feel like I'm just taking their money. They will never progress unless they do their part at home. I even have trouble with some of the older ones complaining and refusing to do some of the harder exercises such as riding bareback or with no stirrups. ThOse are the ones I feel don't want to be the best they can be. This is just a battle I'm struggling with and I want others opinion.
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Reg. Dec 2008
Posted 2016-01-05 10:09 PM
Subject: RE: For those of you who give lessons...

Elite Veteran

Posts: 886
Location: Where its cold and hot
I give lessons to kids of various ages that have different levels of sassy was. I had my worst Lessin kid ever, no try, demanded her mom help her with everything and if things didn't go her way had a melt down. Her mom was a friend of my mom. At the first lesson she went to the beckoning of her daughter to help her tack, daughter was around 10 yrs old at the time. I fully expect all of my lesson kids if they want to ride, they can tack up their own horse. I politely pulled her aside and explained to her that her daughter must learn to think and want this all on her own and that when she is there, it's only to be supportive and not to do anything. Her daughter of course had a meltdown and stomped her feet for 1/2 an hour but came to the realization she was the one hindering herself. Years later she is one of my most dedicated students that has done a complete 180 simply because I laid down the law and respects my word. She learned though the lessons are hard in the long run she will make tons of progress.
Don't be afraid to stand your ground! There will be some that no matter what you do you can't make them want to work harder. It's something they need to come to terms with on their own. If they want to be the best they will have to work hard. I'm pretty strict with what I expect. If I tell a student to do something it's for the benefit of them not me. They can either do it, or I will pull them off the horse to not waste both of our time. Thankfully it has never reached that point.
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Reg. Jan 2010
Posted 2016-02-03 6:07 PM
Subject: RE: For those of you who give lessons...

Elite Veteran

Posts: 713
Location: PA
 I've never given lessons, but I've taken my fair share of them. I've now had 3 different instructors in my lifetime, the first my local trainer I've ridden with for 7ish years and currently the instructors for my college riding classes. When I was younger and taking lessons I was very willing to learn, and my instructor never overshot her expectations of me. If she had done so I'm sure I would have begun to blunder more often and start losing confidence in myself. Also something that helped keep my dedication thriving was seeing the results. Once I started to take note in the progress that was being made due to the work that was being put in, I began working even harder. All of my instructors are great at displaying the effects of working hard. Dedication is something that is required in this industry, if you're not willing to put in, then you're never going to get what's put out, so to speak. If you have unwilling students who aren't enjoying riding maybe it's just not for them, not everyone is cut out for it and it would be waste on both of your parts if they weren't willing to cooperate. It's a team effort, you can't improve them if they aren't willing to improve themselves. 
Best wishes. 
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Lucy's Mom
Reg. Aug 2006
Posted 2016-02-03 7:35 PM
Subject: RE: For those of you who give lessons...

Elite Veteran

Posts: 765
Location: Oregon
 I have given a few and taken tons! My best lesson bare back my instructor made a game out of it. It's started with holding a pennies with my knees and no reins on a lounge line, and progressed up to dollars and my horse being show sheened so he was slick. If I could make it five laps and not touch the reins or him with my hands.  I got to keep the money. 
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Reg. Oct 2003
Posted 2016-02-03 8:03 PM
Subject: RE: For those of you who give lessons...

Professional Amateur

Posts: 6698
Location: Oklahoma
I like to give lessons to keep me outside riding and being dedicated.  I ask the kids to set goals and we work on what we need to do to meet those goals.  Then once those goals are met - I don't let them quit.  This includes my own child . . now THAT was a challenge.  We both survived..Whew!  Before some finals. . I take her to a different trainer and tell them to yell and her and whip her into shape. . then she performs PERFECT and they don't have to say anything to her.  SMH. . that's another issue though.. .Anyway. . 

Once the goals are written down we work on things and then I have them work on "homework".. the teens are harder to keep focused, but I tell them simply that I am as interested in them reaching their goals that they are.  I am there to help them reach their goal.  I also recruit the parents to assist with keeping them motiated to do their "homework"..  

Then there are times I just have to chalk it up to their interest has changed.  I will sit down and have "the talk" with them and their parents.  

I always give them a hard time and tell them.. DON'T EMBARRASS me or their horse when it it time to pay some entry fees! 

Writing goals and maintaining calendars really helps with focus.  I am looking into an App to help keep track of stuff instead of just written reminders, texts and phone calls in between.  

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