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Location: Never in one place long | My husband and I have been married almost 5 years... like most couples life has happened and the last couple years we've been very busy, college, jobs, traveling for work and commitments take up a big part of our time and we rarely spend time together.... I'm interested in hearing any ideas you have for doing something new and fun or something to help re-connect or just have fun together! If you'd be willing to share any traditions or anything you have found that you really enjoy or think would be a good refreshing thing to do please share! :) |
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Posts: 1857
| The only thing we both try to do is take time to do what the other likes to do. He's really into hunting so every so often I'll go with him, not that I don't have horses that need to be rode, but I just do it because he enjoys it and makes him happy. He'll help me ride a few of my barrel horses, not that he likes them at all or thinks they are worth a darn thing, but he does it because he's spending time with me doing something that I like or need help with. Neither one of us could care less about going out to eat, or bars, etc. So sometimes we'll grab a twelve pack, fishin poles, and sit on the tail gate for hours. Or drive around "checking cattle" and talk, reminisce, talk about our future plans. We're both pretty competitive and more often than not we get into some competition that makes us laugh and cut up. We are simple people and enjoy the simple things. We've been together over 10 years and married 6, 2 kids and too many animals. |
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 Extreme Veteran
Posts: 563
Location: Small Town Iowa | What we do is make sure we have "dates", if one of us feel we need to hang out together we will call or text the other and simply say we need a date. And the dates can be anything from sitting on the porch in the summer to going out to dinner. He likes to ride motorcycles and I know how so I kept my harley around for when he wants to go. I have a million other things I could or should be doing but we always try to remember to make time for each other. And that's without the kids or friends being around. We usually do it about once or twice a month. |
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Posts: 617
Location: London Ontario | We arent married(yet) although it feels like we are. We often go exploring with our dog or he comes to the farm to help with chores, working horses etc. He too is also a hunter and while I would rather stay in bed I will go with him the odd time cause I know it makes him really really happy. And although I don't want to seem materialistic, we will also randomly surprise eachother with little gifts. nothing big but it just shows were thinking about each other. |
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Elite Veteran
Posts: 1094
Location: Idahome | We are both horse people, so life pretty much revolves around them. After our daughter was born, we decided that while we still can do as much as possible with the horses we wanted other things to do as well. We started playing golf a couple years ago for fun and now we both really enjoy it (even if we aren't very good). I look forward to summers to get out and hit a few balls. Our daughter loves to go and ride in the cart and hit balls too. |
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 Elite Veteran
Posts: 1182
Location: Do I hear Banjos? | My SO and I love being outdoors. Hiking, hunting, riding, fishing...you name it. By chance we stumbled onto Geocaching. Up where we live it is fun to hike and look for the sites together. We use an App that shows what is nearby. There are caches at parks, local waterfalls, national parks etc you name it. Its fun to find the sites and log them together. Some hunts are long hikes but often we can make a quick find as we are out driving or doing other things. For example we took the Jeep out for a secenic drive on a crappy weather day...and just checked the App to see if there were any nearby. There was! A quick stop at the scenic overlook and a short fast hike (in the rain). We found it and ran back to the jeep!
It's neat because it gets us out hiking, and seeing neat places together. And its something neither of us did before so its something that is just "Ours".  |
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  Angel in a Sorrel Coat
Posts: 16030
Location: In a happy place | Do you both like to be outdoors? How about fixing a picnic basket and go somewhere that is special. |
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 564
Location: Texas | Something simple are theme nights or holidays. For example, for St Patricks we had Mexican/Irish night. We made tacos with extra avocado (for green), margaritas (green) and I stopped off at a local bakery and got two shamrock frosted cookies. I heard Saturday is National Grilled Cheese Day. I am thinking about getting creative with grilled cheese that day! |
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Posts: 4121
Location: SE Louisiana | After years of observation... I have some thoughts...
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 Chasin my Dream
Posts: 13651
Location: Alberta | Hubby and I both enjoy riding horses and outdoor activities.......even tho we both have different events we do with them, we can always go for a nice trail ride together (ive even come roping with him). Movie nights as well have been something we do together.....we are thinking about doing a mountain trail ride this summer....
............if you live on an acerage or farm, just spend time together doing stuff in the yard or whatever! Going away for a weekend, even if it's just to the closest bigger centre and spend the weekend in a hotel....turn of cell phones and (if you have any) leave kids with someone (if you can) |
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Expert
Posts: 1343
Location: East Texas | Make it a PRIORITY to make time for each other, have a kiss that lasts at least 15 seconds everyday, and have sex as often as possible!! This is coming from someone about to celebrate 35 years of marriage!!!
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 Bye-Bye Jiggle
Posts: 1691
Location: Where ever there's sunshine! | We've only been married 2 weeks but we've been together for 7 years. We started making ourselves go on date night once a week. Movies, dinner, beach, gunshow, anything just asking as it puts us together. Hold hands, a kiss that lasts more than a millisecond, when you speak to each other look into each other's eyes. It's hard but where there's a will there's a way :) |
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Expert
Posts: 1857
| horsesinharleton - 2014-04-10 2:34 PM
Make it a PRIORITY to make time for each other, have a kiss that lasts at least 15 seconds everyday, and have sex as often as possible!! This is coming from someone about to celebrate 35 years of marriage!!!
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 Elite Veteran
Posts: 602
| Ive been with my husband for 10 years now. We are like you guys...... busy, busy, busy. If we cant set aside a date night then we do simple things, like cuddling and talking before we fall asleep at night. Or we will sit outside and drink beer together.  I think being able to actual unwind and calm down makes the romance come back. You would be surprised how hard it is to shut off the busy life for 15 mins. |
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 Money Eating Baggage Owner
Posts: 9586
Location: Phoenix | Not married but been together awhile and we are busy. Yesterday, we hung out in the pool all day....we were drinking, floating, BBQing, went rollerblading....and it was SO FUN. With nothing to do but float around and drink and listen to music we talked and reminisced.....it it was nice.
I would try and plan a day getaway or something every once in a while. Something where there's no rush to be anywhere or hurry. We really like to travel so we will do day-trips together.
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Expert
Posts: 4121
Location: SE Louisiana | Another aspect....
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Posts: 216
Location: SC/Ga line | www.iamchanged.com check out the videos! I have been there 500 hours. It was the best thing that I ever did for my life! My husband and I have a GREAT relationship! PTL!!!!! |
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 I'm Here!!
Posts: 4583
Location: Is it Summer Yet? | dream_chaser - 2014-04-10 11:44 AM
Hubby and I both enjoy riding horses and outdoor activities.......even tho we both have different events we do with them, we can always go for a nice trail ride together (ive even come roping with him). Movie nights as well have been something we do together.....we are thinking about doing a mountain trail ride this summer....
............if you live on an acerage or farm, just spend time together doing stuff in the yard or whatever! Going away for a weekend, even if it's just to the closest bigger centre and spend the weekend in a hotel....turn of cell phones and (if you have any) leave kids with someone (if you can)
If you do a mountain trail ride come down to my neck of the woods. There's a ranch down here that would do a nice weekend ride/ bed and breakfast. Awesome people. |
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Elite Veteran
Posts: 1034
| DLV - 2014-04-10 10:40 AM
My husband and I have been married almost 5 years... like most couples life has happened and the last couple years we've been very busy, college, jobs, traveling for work and commitments take up a big part of our time and we rarely spend time together.... I'm interested in hearing any ideas you have for doing something new and fun or something to help re-connect or just have fun together! If you'd be willing to share any traditions or anything you have found that you really enjoy or think would be a good refreshing thing to do please share! :)
We are ways busy, too. Today we met for lunch. I was working and realized I didn't have lunch plans so we arranged it last minute via text. It was super nice.
He rides with me sometimes even though he sees horses as 'work'. (He grew up on a working ranch, where horses are tools, not fun).
We put the little ones to bed by 8, otherwise we are out of energy for each other by bedtime. The teenager can be trusted to go to bed on his own. |
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 Arriving at the last minute!
Posts: 5148
Location: Kansas | horsesinharleton - 2014-04-10 2:34 PM Make it a PRIORITY to make time for each other, have a kiss that lasts at least 15 seconds everyday, and have sex as often as possible!! This is coming from someone about to celebrate 35 years of marriage!!!
This sounds like the best advice. Guys want to feel connected. All the other advice is good but this is great!!! |
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 Expert
Posts: 3004
Location: nearby | FlyingJT - 2014-04-10 11:00 AM
The only thing we both try to do is take time to do what the other likes to do. He's really into hunting so every so often I'll go with him, not that I don't have horses that need to be rode, but I just do it because he enjoys it and makes him happy. He'll help me ride a few of my barrel horses, not that he likes them at all or thinks they are worth a darn thing, but he does it because he's spending time with me doing something that I like or need help with. Neither one of us could care less about going out to eat, or bars, etc. So sometimes we'll grab a twelve pack, fishin poles, and sit on the tail gate for hours. Or drive around "checking cattle" and talk, reminisce, talk about our future plans. We're both pretty competitive and more often than not we get into some competition that makes us laugh and cut up. We are simple people and enjoy the simple things. We've been together over 10 years and married 6, 2 kids and too many animals.
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Expert
Posts: 1432
Location: Never in one place long | hammerdown - 2014-04-10 12:51 PM
Something simple are theme nights or holidays. For example, for St Patricks we had Mexican/Irish night. We made tacos with extra avocado (for green), margaritas (green) and I stopped off at a local bakery and got two shamrock frosted cookies. I heard Saturday is National Grilled Cheese Day. I am thinking about getting creative with grilled cheese that day!
Very cool! Sounds like something I'd like! |
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 Vodka for Lunch
Location: Lala Land | Advice I was given was to never stop being intimate.
After 10 yrs we still try to go to dinner once a week, nothing fancy just dinner and a few drinks. After work we take time to air out the work drama and head out to the barn. I think the most important thing is to make the most of the time you do have, don't sweat the small stuff, and remember why you married him in the first place (that helps me when I want to choke him).
Also, there's a great new song called Stripes by Brandy Clark.
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 Expert
Posts: 3477
Location: Argyle, NY | Everybody is busy - trying to make time for each other is huge. Especially for us right now- I work the typical 8:30-4:30 M-F job, hubby is working (yeah!) but at a farm job - he leaves at 11:30 am and doesn't get home until 2:30 am! We NEVER see each other - he is working another farm job on his "days off" - so if we actually see each other a few hours a week it is big - stressful to say the least! |
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Chasin my Dream
Posts: 13651
Location: Alberta | Lana - 2014-04-21 7:04 PM dream_chaser - 2014-04-10 11:44 AM
Hubby and I both enjoy riding horses and outdoor activities.......even tho we both have different events we do with them, we can always go for a nice trail ride together (ive even come roping with him). Movie nights as well have been something we do together.....we are thinking about doing a mountain trail ride this summer....
............if you live on an acerage or farm, just spend time together doing stuff in the yard or whatever! Going away for a weekend, even if it's just to the closest bigger centre and spend the weekend in a hotel....turn of cell phones and (if you have any) leave kids with someone (if you can) If you do a mountain trail ride come down to my neck of the woods. There's a ranch down here that would do a nice weekend ride/ bed and breakfast. Awesome people.
 Oh its not a "just us" trip as he apparently already has been planning with his buddy and his wife to come along......gone goes the romance  |
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 Dr. Ruth
Posts: 9891
Location: Blissfully happy Giants fan!!! | horsesinharleton - 2014-04-10 2:34 PM Make it a PRIORITY to make time for each other, have a kiss that lasts at least 15 seconds everyday, and have sex as often as possible!! This is coming from someone about to celebrate 35 years of marriage!!!
This. GREAT advice. Hubby and I work different hours with different days off. BUT, we try to make time for each other. Sunday mornings are usually our day. We get up, go to church, eat out and grab groceries and then he heads off to work. We almost always tell each other, "I love you" when we end a conversation. We tell each other everything and what we are planning on doing so if we can, we can be together.
Also, we laugh a lot. I think it is one of our greatest strengths. Laughing and joking around.
A common activity is helpful. We are season ticket holders to the SF Giants. I love the Giants and so does he. We talk about them all of the time and went out for the home opener and the first 6 games. Dave came out the last 3 because of his time off schedule. But we had so much fun and it was great to do that together. We are going back out for the Dodger series on his birthday. I cannot wait.
Hubby doesn't do horses. He fixes the trailer and helps get horses to vets and feeds when I am away but doesn't really care all that much about them. He plays computer and video games. I care nothing to do any of that. So common time and a common activity are big for us. |
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