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 BHW Resident Surgeon
Posts: 25352
  
Location: Bastrop, Texas | I suppose each of us has been guilty of both, at one time or another, but I'm talking about those who make a habit out of it. Is there a distinction to be made between someone who makes a habit out of being two-faced and someone who is a habitual hypocrite? Just wondering what others think. |
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 Go For It!
  
Location: Texas | There is absolutely a difference… The hypocrite says you shouldn't smoke it's bad for you, and smokes. The 2-faced person says… Oh smoking isn't that bad people are allowed to do what they want with their life (to your face) --- Behind your back they tell everyone how horrible you are for smoking, lol.
The smoking part is just an example… ;)
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 Mouhahaha
Posts: 1786
Location: British Columbia | grinandbareit - 2014-05-26 8:10 AM
There is absolutely a difference… The hypocrite says you shouldn't smoke it's bad for you, and smokes. The 2-faced person says… Oh smoking isn't that bad people are allowed to do what they want with their life (to your face) --- Behind your back they tell everyone how horrible you are for smoking, lol.
The smoking part is just an example… ;)
On that note, basically everyone is a hypocrite because we all preach things we don't practice, and everyone at some point or another is two faced. Humanity is flawed, this isn't new, just far more public. |
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 557
Location: Kansas and loving it | To me hypocrisy is like going to church and saying that you are a Christian. Yet you cheat on your spouse, gossip about people to the point of excluding them for either biracial or financial reasons then criminal, or saying they are pro life and abortion is murder until THEIR son gets his high school girlfriend pregnant, than it is different because he is somebody.
Two faced to me is playing both sides. I might agree with you, than PM someone and nastily disagree. Which what I think happens quite a bit in politics. People you know may agree to your face about all of the politics, but vote different at the poles. |
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 Reaching for the stars....
Posts: 12708
| Two Faced - when a person acts a certain way in one place and acts different in another.
Hipocrite
1.a person who pretends to have virtues, moral or religious beliefs, principles, etc., that he or she does not actually possess, especially a person whose actions belie stated beliefs.
2.a person who feigns some desirable or publicly approved attitude, especially one whose private life, opinions, or statements belie his or her public statements.
Yep, copy and paste. Very similar definitions. |
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BHW Resident Surgeon
Posts: 25352
Location: Bastrop, Texas | I'm liking these responses. How do you handle the situation where you learn that someone you consider to be a friend has been back stabbing you? As I've gotten older I find myself giving others advice that "In the long run, you can never go wrong with telling the truth." The reason I say that is because, in times past, when I have skirted around the truth, it almost always ends up biting you in the ass. Religion is always a good example where we encounter hypocrisy.
Someone uses The Bible as a tool to strengthen their position or justify their way of thinking, but you know all too well that this same person preaches one thing and lives another. In other words, they use the Bible selectively. How do you handle this? |
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 Forever Young
Posts: 6768
Location: relocated to Texas | Both behaviors are based in a lie. Hypocrites and two faced people are liars. |
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 Veteran
Posts: 173
Location: Wyoming- where its always windy! | I agree with the above posts... And being a hypocrite and two faced seem to go hand in hand quite often. As far as how to deal with someone stabbing you in the back, it would seem to me they were never a friend worth having. I think life is much too short to waste time, energy and emotions on someone like that. Is rather have no friends at all than friends who were back stabbers. I guess it all boils down to how much you value the friendship if it's worth it to try to continue.
With the selective Bible usage, My ex husband who was like that. He'd take whatever parts of scripture could strengthen his argument and forget the rest. Drove me crazy. He was doing a lot of things that the Bible warns against but cherry picking scripture a a justified it by saying "his" God wants him to be happy. Big reason he's my EX! |
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BHW Resident Surgeon
Posts: 25352
Location: Bastrop, Texas | I think two-faced people are either cowards, narcissists, or both. A person might be two faced because he/she doesn't have the guts to be truthful to your face...OR that person might be using you for one thing or another.
Some hypocritical people simply don't think enough before talking. Maybe they are just in denial. They say one thing and do the opposite, hoping nobody knows.
I think a two faced person is more malicious.
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Mouhahaha
Posts: 1786
Location: British Columbia | HotbearLVR - 2014-05-26 8:38 AM
I'm liking these responses. How do you handle the situation where you learn that someone you consider to be a friend has been back stabbing you? As I've gotten older I find myself giving others advice that "In the long run, you can never go wrong with telling the truth." The reason I say that is because, in times past, when I have skirted around the truth, it almost always ends up biting you in the ass. Religion is always a good example where we encounter hypocrisy.
Someone uses The Bible as a tool to strengthen their position or justify their way of thinking, but you know all too well that this same person preaches one thing and lives another. In other words, they use the Bible selectively. How do you handle this?
Everyone will back stab you, it's human nature. Whether they are being malicious or they accidentally betray your trust. You just have to decide if their pros outweigh their cons. |
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Addicted to Baseball
Location: Where the stars at night are big and bright, TX | HotbearLVR - 2014-05-26 9:59 AM I think two-faced people are either cowards, narcissists, or both. A person might be two faced because he/she doesn't have the guts to be truthful to your face...OR that person might be using you for one thing or another. Some hypocritical people simply don't think enough before talking. Maybe they are just in denial. They say one thing and do the opposite, hoping nobody knows. I think a two faced person is more malicious.
I agree with everything you said here. I can't stand two faced people and I'm always amazed they come out smelling like a rose most of the time.
I do however, think a hypocrite can be just as malicious and hurtful. I also can't stand that neither see themselves as doing anything wrong and have no problems hurting others. |
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BHW Resident Surgeon
Posts: 25352
Location: Bastrop, Texas | Some people never come to really appreciate how liberating it can be to be completely honest. I'm not saying I have always been a total paragon of virtue when it comes to hypocrisy or being two faced, because I think back over my lifetime and shudder when I recall certain events. Ugh....now I am sounding like Dr Phil!
More and more, when asked for my opinions or advice by friends or relatives, I find myself saying...."Just tell them the truth - you can never go wrong and you don't have to worry about keeping your story straight...." I say that a lot lately, and it's a pretty liberating feeling.
Here's what kills me....when someone besmirches you and it really stings when you know it's not true, and you find out through the grapevine. It's that shock or sense of betrayal, and the mixed emotions that follow.
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Meanest Teacher!!!
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Location: sunny california | I think when people forget to reflect on themselves as a person and reflect honestly they start down the path of hypocrisy. being a liar and judgemental, basically a narcissist as one poster said, is probably their biggest personality trait that sends them down this path. Justification/excuses are what get people into trouble. |
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Meanest Teacher!!!
Posts: 8555
Location: sunny california | HotbearLVR - 2014-05-26 8:36 AM Some people never come to really appreciate how liberating it can be to be completely honest. I'm not saying I have always been a total paragon of virtue when it comes to hypocrisy or being two faced, because I think back over my lifetime and shudder when I recall certain events. Ugh....now I am sounding like Dr Phil! More and more, when asked for my opinions or advice by friends or relatives, I find myself saying...."Just tell them the truth - you can never go wrong and you don't have to worry about keeping your story straight...." I say that a lot lately, and it's a pretty liberating feeling. Here's what kills me....when someone besmirches you and it really stings when you know it's not true, and you find out through the grapevine. It's that shock or sense of betrayal, and the mixed emotions that follow.
i know exactly what you are saying. I was friends with a gal for years and I never said one bad word about her. I thought she was a good person. She had a competive rival and that person was not nice to her and hurt her alot. well I stuck by "my friend". that other person started winning and i was tossed along the wayside. she would come to me and back stab that girl to me and I told her to (blank) herself and did not talk to her for 10 years. I didn't even like the gal she was backstabbing! and yes she was backstabbing me the whole time too. found out what a jealous two faced person she was. when I ran into her 10 years later I had hoped everone had grew up enough to be friendly but nope she started in on that girl like 10 years was only a hiccup in a bad converstion!
she now enjoys being backstabbed by her daughter in law they are besties.
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| Hypocrisy or two faced?? Where do you stand when it comes to our veterans?!
"Thank you for your service"-Really?
-food assistance cuts to 170,000 veterans.
-VA claims processing average wait time 260 days, some as long as 500+ days.
-in Feb. a bill to expand veterans benefits was voted down as "too expensive".
-refusal to fund embassy security to requested levels.
-denial of medicaid expansion in 23 states leaves 258,000 veterans without health care.
-Veterans Job Corps Act-funding jobs for veterans-voted down.
-DOD cuts pay to our troops but keeps or adds to funding for out of date weapons systems to satisfy a congressional district vote.
-etc. etc. etc.
This is actually meant to be a question in its form.
How do YOU thank a veteran for their service? Besides lip service!!
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BHW Resident Surgeon
Posts: 25352
Location: Bastrop, Texas | IB1UKNO - 2014-05-26 11:30 AM Hypocrisy or two faced?? Where do you stand when it comes to our veterans?! "Thank you for your service"-Really? -food assistance cuts to 170,000 veterans. -VA claims processing average wait time 260 days, some as long as 500+ days. -in Feb. a bill to expand veterans benefits was voted down as "too expensive". -refusal to fund embassy security to requested levels. -denial of medicaid expansion in 23 states leaves 258,000 veterans without health care. -Veterans Job Corps Act-funding jobs for veterans-voted down. -DOD cuts pay to our troops but keeps or adds to funding for out of date weapons systems to satisfy a congressional district vote. -etc. etc. etc. This is actually meant to be a question in its form. How do YOU thank a veteran for their service? Besides lip service!!
The kind of hypocrisy you are referring to knows no bounds, nor is it confined to one party. When it comes to politics, hypocrisy is the rule, not the exception.
What I am talking about is not the obvious hypocrisy we are witnessing within our government. I intended this thread to be more along the lines of hypocrisy and two faced people in our daily lives. |
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 I Don't Brag
Posts: 6960
| TMEquine - 2014-05-26 10:02 AM
HotbearLVR - 2014-05-26 8:38 AM
I'm liking these responses. How do you handle the situation where you learn that someone you consider to be a friend has been back stabbing you? As I've gotten older I find myself giving others advice that "In the long run, you can never go wrong with telling the truth." The reason I say that is because, in times past, when I have skirted around the truth, it almost always ends up biting you in the ass. Religion is always a good example where we encounter hypocrisy.
Someone uses The Bible as a tool to strengthen their position or justify their way of thinking, but you know all too well that this same person preaches one thing and lives another. In other words, they use the Bible selectively. How do you handle this?
Everyone will back stab you, it's human nature. Whether they are being malicious or they accidentally betray your trust. You just have to decide if their pros outweigh their cons.
I don't agree that everyone will backstab you. They may hurt or disappoint you unwittingly or by choice but that is not always backstabbing. As to Scott's question about how to handle it, you have to come to that decision on your own.
For myself, I keep very few GOOD friends, the rest of the world are an acquaintance at best.
I let few people close enough to do any real damage. If I find out that someone is backstabbing or talking about me behind my back, I may or may not confront them. I WILL confront them if I talk about them to anyone else. After that, I pretty much put them in a category beyond acquaintance into a category of those not to be trusted. Below that is a category of very few with who I will not have dealings with....ever. Not too many people in that one, but it does exist for the toxic people who do nothing but poison your life.
This works for me, especially since I really don't care what most people think, only those for whom I have some measure of respect, the rest can go hang. And anybody that knows me well enough, knows the truth or will at least ask. |
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Nut Case Expert
Posts: 9305
Location: Tulsa, Ok | I am pretty much with rodeoveteran. What you see is what you get. If I have something to say to or about you it will be to your face. People who cannot treat me the same each and every time they see me will remain acquaintenances. If you don't like me as well when I am beating you as you do when you are beating me, we aren't going to be friends. Stab me in the back once and there will not be a second chance.
Only a week ago and individual tried to throw me under the bus to deflect from their own behavior. They probably should beware of impending tire tracks!! |
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Go For It!
Location: Texas | HotbearLVR - 2014-05-26 10:36 AM
Some people never come to really appreciate how liberating it can be to be completely honest. I'm not saying I have always been a total paragon of virtue when it comes to hypocrisy or being two faced, because I think back over my lifetime and shudder when I recall certain events. Ugh....now I am sounding like Dr Phil!
More and more, when asked for my opinions or advice by friends or relatives, I find myself saying...."Just tell them the truth - you can never go wrong and you don't have to worry about keeping your story straight...." I say that a lot lately, and it's a pretty liberating feeling.
Here's what kills me....when someone besmirches you and it really stings when you know it's not true, and you find out through the grapevine. It's that shock or sense of betrayal, and the mixed emotions that follow.
It always stings when people make up stuff… But here is what I have learned over the years… People will disappoint you. It may be your spouse, parent, child, friend, everyone is just one step away from doing something that you won't understand. That's just life. When I meet people I have no expectations regarding them. You can't put your trust in people, they will disappoint you every time. You have to put your trust in God, period. We are generally hurt by others because our expectations are too high for humanity, lol. Hey, I try to always do the right thing, but I am far from perfect, it is just a matter of time before I do or say something that I shouldn't. Ask my family, lol. But my heart is in the right place these days and nothing that I do is intentionally done to hurt someone, and the people who really know me, know that. That is all that really matters.
As far as that sting goes, just ignore it and move on. And be glad you aren't a politician or an actor! ;)
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 Expert
Posts: 4121
Location: SE Louisiana | HotbearLVR - 2014-05-26 9:38 AM I'm liking these responses. How do you handle the situation where you learn that someone you consider to be a friend has been back stabbing you? As I've gotten older I find myself giving others advice that "In the long run, you can never go wrong with telling the truth." The reason I say that is because, in times past, when I have skirted around the truth, it almost always ends up biting you in the ass. Religion is always a good example where we encounter hypocrisy. Someone uses The Bible as a tool to strengthen their position or justify their way of thinking, but you know all too well that this same person preaches one thing and lives another. In other words, they use the Bible selectively. How do you handle this?
Look Doc.... If Neva bit you, just get her a muzzle.. |
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 529
| Its been my experience that being a hypocrite and backstabbing go hand in hand with people. Sadly see it a lot in the barrel racing world...So I have really limited myself to whom I associate with...I always remind myself im doing this for my horse first, socializing/people are secondary. |
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Expert
Posts: 4121
Location: SE Louisiana | fortyforever - 2014-05-27 1:49 PM Its been my experience that being a hypocrite and backstabbing go hand in hand with people. Sadly see it a lot in the barrel racing world...So I have really limited myself to whom I associate with...I always remind myself im doing this for my horse first, socializing/people are secondary.
Wha...what??  |
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 529
| Komet, I mean when I go to a barrel race...my main priority is my horse, not socializing...  |
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Expert
Posts: 4121
Location: SE Louisiana | fortyforever - 2014-05-27 3:40 PM
Komet, I mean when I go to a barrel race...my main priority is my horse, not socializing...
Ahh.. OK!! |
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What's the difference between hypocrisy and being two-faced?