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Expert
Posts: 2685
   
| Ok so long story short, I'm young, I have a decent job, a few horses, a nice truck and just bought a step up horse trailer that is nice enough to stay in. I pay for all of it without help. I do however live with my parents. I do not like to admit it and my parents and I are extremely close and yada yada but something is about to happen at home (or they are talking about it) that I cannot live with.
A person that just recently and a few years back and pretty consistently has caused my family a HUGE amount of stress, hurt, money ect (almost caused my family member to take his life) is invited and coming to live with us. This person is a BAD person. BAD person. and has 3 kids that get pawned off on everyone she possibly can or left at home alone (oldest is 10) so she can go to work and Lord knows what else.
I cant sit back and watch this woman do this. I can't do it. She is going to be the death of that 1 family member and its going to tear my family apart. If I try to stop it, it will only get worse. I have no idea what to do other than to leave. I have no one I can tell this to.
Here's my deal, I don't have the $$ to leave. I can sell a horse (I only have 2) but I don't think it would free up the $600+ it would take to get an appt. The trailer payment is tiny so that really didn't make a difference. There really is nowhere else I can cut corners to be able to afford an apt and I know no one here. I board my horses and the place is nice. For $100/ month I can plug in my trailer to water and electric. I really am thinking about doing this. I have most of my household things in a storage building already. All I would need is my clothes out there.
but its about to be winter and cold and do I really want to deal with the cold and ugh :( I don't know what to do.
Even if I could just get some prayers for guidance that would be great.
If you have something mean or rude or hurtful to say. Keep walking. I do not need to hear it because believe me you can't say anything I haven't said to myself. |
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 Shelter Dog Lover
Posts: 10277
| I don't think it is weird if you honestly think that is what you need to do. No real advice other than maybe your parents are letting this person move in for the sake of the children. Looking at it from this perspective doesn't change anything but maybe offer some more understanding of the situation. Hugs, sounds like a tough situation.
Edited by rodeomom3 2014-07-19 7:29 AM
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 520
| No I don't think that would be weird, I would be perfectly happy living in a trailer if I had a bathroom in it and somewhere to cook. Do you have heater in the trailer for the winter?
Sorry you are having to deal with this. |
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Expert
Posts: 2685
| I have an A/C & heater, microwave, fridge & several plug ins. I found a tankless water heater I can hang from the bridle hooks in the first stall of my trailer for $130 and I'm going to buy a potty to put in there to (weather I live in it or not) but he also has a little out house out there that is enclosed. I figured I would get my bathroom stuff and turn the 1st stall into basically a bathroom and get the plug in stove top thingys or a griddle. I planed on doing all of this to haul with not really to live in but I just can't be ok with this. Its not right in my heart or my mind. |
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Go Get Em!
Posts: 13503
Location: OH. IO | what state do you live in? I dont think it would be a bad idea at all, Prayers for you |
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Expert
Posts: 2685
| OK.
Thank you everyone.
Its not like a right now thing and I don't want to make a ruckus here at home by throwing a fit and I wont leave until or if she comes. I just want to be prepared and not end up in a bad situation. |
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 Expert
Posts: 4121
Location: SE Louisiana | Welcome to the neighborhood... You won't like it here... |
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 Expert
Posts: 2457
| Hugs - I am sorry that you have to deal with this ... It is not weird to live in a trailer.
Have you considered maybe finding a roommate who already has an apt? If you don't have any pets (dogs, cats, etc) that may be a really good option. I did that when I moved to a large college town for a job, and it worked out awesome. You don't have to be friends with 'em, just pay bills and be clean and respectful. Often, it is much cheaper too!
Good Luck and I'll add ya to my prayer list! |
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  Fact Checker
Posts: 16575
Location: Displaced Iowegian | RoaniePonie11 - 2014-07-19 7:11 AM I have an A/C & heater, microwave, fridge & several plug ins. I found a tankless water heater I can hang from the bridle hooks in the first stall of my trailer for $130 and I'm going to buy a potty to put in there to (weather I live in it or not) but he also has a little out house out there that is enclosed. I figured I would get my bathroom stuff and turn the 1st stall into basically a bathroom and get the plug in stove top thingys or a griddle. I planed on doing all of this to haul with not really to live in but I just can't be ok with this. Its not right in my heart or my mind.
Many people have or do live in their horse trailers......What would worry me (depending on the area you live in) is the "water" and bathroom facilities.....thawing out frozen water pipes is NOT fun and can be very expensive if they break. Good Luck with whatever your decision is ....... |
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 Angel in a Sorrel Coat
Posts: 16030
Location: In a happy place | lindseylou2290 - 2014-07-19 8:04 AM Hugs - I am sorry that you have to deal with this ... It is not weird to live in a trailer. Have you considered maybe finding a roommate who already has an apt? If you don't have any pets (dogs, cats, etc ) that may be a really good option. I did that when I moved to a large college town for a job, and it worked out awesome. You don't have to be friends with 'em, just pay bills and be clean and respectful. Often, it is much cheaper too! Good Luck and I'll add ya to my prayer list!
These are some good ideas. I don't think it would be weird to live in your trailer either. And a big hug and prayers for you. |
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Meanest Teacher!!!
Posts: 8555
Location: sunny california | I don't think it is weird at all. the biggest problem with living in a trailer is the bathroom aspect. I have a LQ but the shower is small and I think it would be a pain after a while...
you still need to dump your waste from your trailer. Not sure if the boarding place has that set up for you. you say there is an outhouse. what about making a very small shower setup with a french drain on the place?
If I thought I was going to be there a while I might ask the owners if I bought the materials if they are handy or if you have a boyfreind, putting up a very small shed and installing a shower with drain and perhaps walling off a partion for my storage. this might be a shower that others could use. Not sure if plumbing/drainage would be an issure or not. just thinking...
we built a decent size shed: 10x14 with 8ft high walls and hipped roof so large loft. we walled off 4 ft for the chickens and above it is a 10x4 loft; we joked around with my son that he could sleep above the chickens and have a 10x10 place to live.. he said if he ever can't afford his place he is game! It would be very easy for us to install plumbing as there is water supply and electrical are only 25 ft away. and our soil percs really well so a french drain would be very doable. Now ours is too big and expensive but you could just go real tiny or even get a used one on craigslist if you have some handy help!
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 Texas Lone Star
Posts: 5318
Location: where ever my L/Q trl is parked | I'm planning on doing that next year after I sell the house and everything I don't need. What I can't sell will go into storage. I'm sick of big mortgage and will never pay if off and along with the up keep.
There are places around where I live that have complete up hooks and horse stalls for as little as $290 a month. Now this one place is 20 miles from the nearest town, but it's clean and safe. The other place is on outskirt of town for $350 and know of a place that has those prefab log cabins 2bd1b and very large trap for horse approx 80'X80' a arena and hot walker and parking for trailers for $900 a month.
If you feel that this would be the best thing for you then go for it. I'm sure if it doesn't work out you can go back home. |
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Hungarian Midget Woman
Location: Midwest | No real insight from me, but hugs and best of luck.
Id try to find a roommate to split a cheap apartment if you can swing it. I think that might be easier to deal with, especially regarding plumbing and such.
I really hope the situatuation improves!!! |
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 A Somebody to Everybody
Posts: 41354
Location: Under The Big Sky Of Texas | Sounds like you already have it plan out how you will be living in your trailer, all I can say is give it a try, if you need too. Good luck 
Edited by Southtxponygirl 2014-07-19 10:37 AM
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 Expert
Posts: 1440
Location: Texas | It sounds like it is doable if you have to but..... Due to the restroom situation I would try to find a roommate in an apartment or even find a small efficiency apartment on your own. I think in the long run you would be much happier. |
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 Ditch the Stirrups
Posts: 5369
Location: Sorrow Not! Defending against workplace bullies | It is not weird but could be very difficult if your trailer is "rustic" (not a real bathroom, etc.) and small. If you have decent credit why not buy a really nice LQ with slide outs, good heat and air, kithcen and bathroom, and pay it off as you live in it? The monthly payments you make could be cheaper than rent but would be going toward something you will eventually own. Also maybe to save $$, since you are already parking at a stable, see if you can work there part time cleaning stalls, etc.
Also just a word of advice but you do not want to live/make big decisions on the basis of reacting to others. You will not be happy in the long run. Instead look at this as a decision you are making on your own to be more independent, which is a positive thing...not as reaction to a decision your parents are making. I hope that makes sense to you. Please know I am not judging you, just making a suggestion. |
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"Heck's Coming With Me"
Posts: 10797
Location: Kansas | Personally I think it sounds cramped and totally miserable but that's in the "to each his own" realm. Good luck to you by gosh.
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 Mrs. Perks Alive
Posts: 1162
Location: Madill Ok | Winter may be tough in a trailer and if your an outdoors person it may make you crazy being stuck inside all winter. No way I could do it..... Maybe check around for a boarding place with an apartment living area for rent. Or check around for someone who has a room for rent which would be better ? If you put your mind to it, Im sure you could figure something out. |
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Elite Veteran
Posts: 898
Location: Mountains of VA | Sometimes the best thing is to remove yourself from a bad situation to help keep your sanity. Take care of yourself and it sounds like you are well-organized and have a realistic plan. |
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 Not Afraid to Work
Posts: 4717
| Well without going into detail I can tell you I completely understand... more than you know. I am currently looking for a roommate or considering buying living quarters. However, I dont have a nice place to park it.
I say, do it because I know what its like to not be able to sit back and watch. You can save money if its feasible to live in and get your trailer paid off quicker. |
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Expert
Posts: 3147
| RoaniePonie11 - 2014-07-19 6:46 AM
Ok so long story short, I'm young, I have a decent job, a few horses, a nice truck and just bought a step up horse trailer that is nice enough to stay in. I pay for all of it without help. I do however live with my parents. I do not like to admit it and my parents and I are extremely close and yada yada but something is about to happen at home (or they are talking about it) that I cannot live with.
A person that just recently and a few years back and pretty consistently has caused my family a HUGE amount of stress, hurt, money ect (almost caused my family member to take his life) is invited and coming to live with us. This person is a BAD person. BAD person. and has 3 kids that get pawned off on everyone she possibly can or left at home alone (oldest is 10) so she can go to work and Lord knows what else.
I cant sit back and watch this woman do this. I can't do it. She is going to be the death of that 1 family member and its going to tear my family apart. If I try to stop it, it will only get worse. I have no idea what to do other than to leave. I have no one I can tell this to.
Here's my deal, I don't have the $$ to leave. I can sell a horse (I only have 2) but I don't think it would free up the $600+ it would take to get an appt. The trailer payment is tiny so that really didn't make a difference. There really is nowhere else I can cut corners to be able to afford an apt and I know no one here. I board my horses and the place is nice. For $100/ month I can plug in my trailer to water and electric. I really am thinking about doing this. I have most of my household things in a storage building already. All I would need is my clothes out there.
but its about to be winter and cold and do I really want to deal with the cold and ugh :( I don't know what to do.
Even if I could just get some prayers for guidance that would be great.
If you have something mean or rude or hurtful to say. Keep walking. I do not need to hear it because believe me you can't say anything I haven't said to myself.
Have you talked with your parents and told them how you feel about the situation and that are contemplating moving out if this person moves in? It could help them decide what to do.
Just make sure they know you love them and it's not about how they treat you |
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Expert
Posts: 2685
| Thank you to everyone for the advice and support. I feel like this is a scary step but as someone said earlier it is truly a step towards independence and that kinda makes me feel better.
Ok so last night in the truck my brother ("the" family memeber) was not around so I asked for more details on why and what the thought process was. My step dad basically looked at my mom with the same question on his face. He is not happy about it either. She basically said in my brothers mind and the girlfriends they are still together and this is what my brother wants. Mind you she couldn't drive 5 mins to see him in the hospital I don think I see her driving several hours to live here. I told mom I'm not going to try to argue the situation because I realize there is nothing I can do but it doesn't sit right in my heart so I will not be a part of it. There is a chance I can go live with my gparents that are 5 miles from my horses. So hopefully that works out. She didn't really say much. She did go from wanting to kill this person a few weeks ago so half heartedly defending her. She's doing this because my brother is her favorite- and that's fine- but this is not good for him. On the flip side of this the harder you fight him the more he will do what's not good for him so she really is stuck between a rock and a hard place. I told her I'm not asking her to choose anything and it has nothing to do with her or Michael or my brother for that matter but I can't be a part of it. I'm not packing my toys immediately just when/ if she shows up I will.
As for where to live I did find out I might be able to live with my gparents (her parents) so that's good. They are close to the barn. I don't get along with her mom well but as I get older and get myself more established she is slowly respecting my position on life a little more. I'm just like my daddy. Very honest and blunt and my dad makes her skin crawl but we are getting better. As for the trailer the plumbing part would be no prob. I'm sure the man that owns the place would have the handy man do just about anything if I bought the materials or paid for them. Half of the place used to be a trailer park back in the day so it's set up almost perfect.
Again, thanks everyone for the advice & support. Hopefully it doesn't come to this but I do feel I need to be as prepared as possible. |
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how weird would it be to move into my horse trailer? Way OT but idk what to do