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 Ima Non Controversial Girl
Posts: 4168
  
Location: where the wind blows | If you were married then got divorced would you keep your ex husbands last name or go back to your maiden name. To not panick those that know me I'm happily married. Just saw the name of a gal who was married to a former neighbor 10 plus years ago and she's still using his last name. They were only married a year at most. I know some (like my sisters) kept so they are same as kids but I honestly don't think I'd keep my ex husbands name if I were to divorce. Just made me curious as to why you chose to or chose to go back to your maiden. Can you tell I'm bored. :) |
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 Ima Fickle Fan
Posts: 3547
 
Location: Texas | I would keep it. I have two boys and wouldn't want to confuse them. Plus, I didn't like my maiden name. And it was a pain in the @$$ to change it when I got married. I'd rather skip the hassle. |
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 Elite Veteran
Posts: 678
Location: Canada | I can see the benefits of keeping it. When your young and get married and change your name you typically only have some financial companies you need to notify. As you age you typically have a mortgage, retirement savings, personal loans, credit cards etc, etc. and notifying all the companies of a name change is painful and time consuming so most simply keep the name.
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 Extreme Veteran
Posts: 507
Location: Texas | I kept my ex's last name but we were married 13 years and that is how everyone knew me. Plus it is not fun changing your name on everything! |
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 596
Location: Somewhere in the middle of nowhere | When I divorced, I kept my ex's last name because my kids were young and I didn't want to confuse them. I also think it would depend on how long you were married. I also know that some women keep their ex's last name because they can't let go of the ex.... |
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 Good Grief!
Posts: 6343
Location: Cap'n Joan Rotgut.....alberta | i never changed mine when i got married..so it was easy when we split ....lol
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 I hate cooking and cleaning
Posts: 3314
Location: Jersey Girl | I kept it because of my son. If I didn't have him I would have gone back to my maiden name. |
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Expert
Posts: 1207
| I changed mine back to my maiden name and I was married 30 plus years, no kids. Didn't want to be associated with that last name. |
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Elite Veteran
Posts: 1094
Location: Idahome | Have an aunt who's husband #2 had the last name Brown. When they divorced, she kept the name and eventually met husband #3 with the same last name. Never had to worry about changing it. You just never know, you may get lucky with the next one. |
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 Party Gal
Posts: 3432
Location: fun meter pegged OK | Since I had kids, kept my married name. Otherwise, I would have gone back to my maiden. |
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Elite Veteran
Posts: 1028
| I changed mine back to my maiden name. I didn't want to be reminded of him (and how awful he was) every time I signed my name, wrote an email, etc. |
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  Friendly horse swapper
Posts: 4122
Location: Buffalo, TX | I really wanted to go back to my maiden name 31 years ago, and I wish I did.....but I think it's too late now...funny you would bring this up, I was actually thinking about wanting to do it anyway a couple weeks ago....don't really know why, and I still might, but it would throw everyone for a loop...my maiden name is Miers....don't know yet...I bet people would hear it and think I got re-married and would try to figure out who...LOL.... |
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Location: Saskatchewan | Soon as the divorce papers were done, I changed it back. It was a pain but we were only married for 3 years, was young and frankly I didn't want to be associated with his family. He was actually upset I changed it back lol um i'm not married to you why would I keep it, we also had no kids. |
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Party Gal
Posts: 3432
Location: fun meter pegged OK | Cindy Hamilton - 2014-10-15 4:53 PM I really wanted to go back to my maiden name 31 years ago, and I wish I did.....but I think it's too late now...funny you would bring this up, I was actually thinking about wanting to do it anyway a couple weeks ago....don't really know why, and I still might, but it would throw everyone for a loop...my maiden name is Miers....don't know yet...I bet people would hear it and think I got re-married and would try to figure out who...LOL....
Now that would be funny! |
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 Party Girl
Posts: 12293
Location: Buffalo, Wyoming | My parents were married for 17 years and have been divorced for about the same amount of time. My mom never got remarried and has kept our last name.
She alway got along with my dad's side of the family just not my dad. I never really thought about her changing it back but will have to ask her why she kept it. |
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 Extreme Veteran
Posts: 554
| When my mom divorced my dad she kept our last name since everyone at work knew her by that name. Also, my brother was underage and the hassle of changing it. Her maiden last name was an easy one, I told her she should of picked a guy with a better last name growing up. The benefit to our last name is not too many people have it and when someone calls to sell you something, when they can't pronounce it can hang up on them before they try again to pronounce it. It is entertaining the variations I have heard of the years of people trying to guess my last name let alone how to say it. |
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 Expert
Posts: 3815
Location: The best kept secret in TX | I know a girl who was only married a year and kept the name to spite the family... She is currently in jail, again... and is running down the prominant family's name... Bad deal...
I guess people have different reasons... I would want to go back to mine if anything ever happened but I love my family and my last name... |
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Expert
Posts: 3815
Location: The best kept secret in TX | rowdy256 - 2014-10-15 5:44 PM When my mom divorced my dad she kept our last name since everyone at work knew her by that name. Also, my brother was underage and the hassle of changing it. Her maiden last name was an easy one, I told her she should of picked a guy with a better last name growing up. The benefit to our last name is not too many people have it and when someone calls to sell you something, when they can't pronounce it can hang up on them before they try again to pronounce it. It is entertaining the variations I have heard of the years of people trying to guess my last name let alone how to say it.
Now I'm curious about YOUR last name LOL  |
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 Expert
Posts: 1261
| I would keep it! My maiden name is awful...and it would re associate me with a crap family lol |
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The Advice Guru
Posts: 6419
| I do know that it costs money to have it legally changed back.
Also a big hassle, drivers liscence, passport, credit cards, banking, postal office, if you add it up it could end up costing quite a bit. |
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 Elite Veteran
Posts: 927
Location: Iowa | I took my maiden name back while filing the papers for the divorce. It didn't cost any extra. My ex couldn't write a check around here so I didn't want to be associated with his last name. I will say that was the "thing" that really pissed him off with the whole divorce. He tried to stop me from changing it. |
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 554
| IRunOnFaith - 2014-10-15 5:51 PM
rowdy256 - 2014-10-15 5:44 PM When my mom divorced my dad she kept our last name since everyone at work knew her by that name. Also, my brother was underage and the hassle of changing it. Her maiden last name was an easy one, I told her she should of picked a guy with a better last name growing up. The benefit to our last name is not too many people have it and when someone calls to sell you something, when they can't pronounce it can hang up on them before they try again to pronounce it. It is entertaining the variations I have heard of the years of people trying to guess my last name let alone how to say it.
Now I'm curious about YOUR last name LOL
Hladik |
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 The Color Specialist
Posts: 7530
Location: Washington. (The DRY side.) | Since folks are bored, I'll tell you what my mother did. Lol. She married my sperm donor when she was 18. They divorced when i was about 2yo. so had only had his last name for 2 years. But kept it because it was then the same as mine. Fast forward 19 years. She got married again, had 2 more kids, divorced again. THEN changed her last name BACK to her first married last name. (She asked my sperm donors family if they minded, they said no as they always considered her "one of them".) Reason was, she had had that last name ALL of her adult life. What was funny was my sisters wanted to change theirs too. (That didn't happen.) |
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 No Tune in a Bucket
Posts: 2935
Location: Texas | My X-daughter-in-law kept our last name after her and my son divorced. They were only married long enough for her to ruin his credit and had no kids. Don't know why she kept it, but it did not sit right with me. She did her best to ruin his reputation along with his credit. |
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 The Comeback Kid
Posts: 1564
Location: lost in missouri | Its funny hearing about the gals whose ex's got mad because they dropped his name when I have heard a lot of cases where the man has had it in the divorce decree that they have to drop his name. |
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 Neat Freak
Posts: 11216
Location: Wonderful Wyoming | I would keep it as it is my boys last name. My friend has 2 kids, 2 different husbands/dads so she went back to her maiden name as her kids had diff names anyways. |
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Ima Fickle Fan
Posts: 3547
Location: Texas | My mom has been married and divorced 4 times. After divorce #3, I know she kept that hubby's last name for professional reasons as that is how everyone knew her. I do not know if she ever took hubby #4's last name. (Could never get a straight answer from her.) #4 was a womanizing POS. I know my mom wants to take back her maiden name when she retires. I also know hubby #3 recently received a letter addressed to my mom and her boyfriend with the last name of BF. For all I know she and the BF could have gotten married. She won't tell us because my sister and I are not fans of his. Plus, if she remarries, she loses alimony and life insurance payout from #4. |
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Industrial Srength Barrel Racer
Posts: 7268
| I kept my married name, I don't have time to mess with that kind of crap. |
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 Bulls Eye
Posts: 6443
Location: Oklahoma | I kept the ex's last name due to having a young daughter... fast forward 5 1/2 years. He's not seen her once or talked to her... I am happily remarried. My daughter wants my husband's last name and we are in the process of step parent adoption. She hasn't seen her sperm donor since she was 18 months old. |
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 Chicken Chick
Posts: 3562
Location: Texas | I was married 2 years the first time. I kept his last name only because it was the same as my son's and I did not want to have to change it all back. |
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Chicken Chick
Posts: 3562
Location: Texas | TwistedK - 2014-10-16 12:06 PM I kept the ex's last name due to having a young daughter... fast forward 5 1/2 years. He's not seen her once or talked to her... I am happily remarried. My daughter wants my husband's last name and we are in the process of step parent adoption. She hasn't seen her sperm donor since she was 18 months old.
Hey good luck with that. My husband just adopted my son last week. My son is SO excited he can hardly control himself lol. |
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Bulls Eye
Posts: 6443
Location: Oklahoma | pinx05 - 2014-10-16 2:06 PM TwistedK - 2014-10-16 12:06 PM I kept the ex's last name due to having a young daughter... fast forward 5 1/2 years. He's not seen her once or talked to her... I am happily remarried. My daughter wants my husband's last name and we are in the process of step parent adoption. She hasn't seen her sperm donor since she was 18 months old. Hey good luck with that. My husband just adopted my son last week. My son is SO excited he can hardly control himself lol.
Oklahoma has some screwed up procedures for it... it's looking expensive as hell... but we know it will be worth it!!!! Need to pimp out my stud and get him breeding so I can afford it! |
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Expert
Posts: 1586
Location: west of East Texas | TwistedK - 2014-10-16 2:07 PM pinx05 - 2014-10-16 2:06 PM TwistedK - 2014-10-16 12:06 PM I kept the ex's last name due to having a young daughter... fast forward 5 1/2 years. He's not seen her once or talked to her... I am happily remarried. My daughter wants my husband's last name and we are in the process of step parent adoption. She hasn't seen her sperm donor since she was 18 months old. Hey good luck with that. My husband just adopted my son last week. My son is SO excited he can hardly control himself lol.
A friend of mine tried the step-parent adoption thing too and found it to be cost prohibitive and legally exhausting. She then found out that she could do a legal name change for her son and then have the stepdad appointed as a legal guardian. The stepdad raised the son from about 5yo and is the real dad. Everybody has the same name. |
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Regular
Posts: 99
| Heck NO I wouldn't keep my ex's last name. He's an embaressment and I told him. I was with him for 23 years and he throw it all out the door. O-well, I'm with a better man now. |
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Bulls Eye
Posts: 6443
Location: Oklahoma | chasendacash - 2014-10-20 12:44 AM TwistedK - 2014-10-16 2:07 PM pinx05 - 2014-10-16 2:06 PM TwistedK - 2014-10-16 12:06 PM I kept the ex's last name due to having a young daughter... fast forward 5 1/2 years. He's not seen her once or talked to her... I am happily remarried. My daughter wants my husband's last name and we are in the process of step parent adoption. She hasn't seen her sperm donor since she was 18 months old. Hey good luck with that. My husband just adopted my son last week. My son is SO excited he can hardly control himself lol.
That is what we are looking at now!!!!! It's mentally and physically exhausting. My ex hasn't seen or talked to her since June 2009 when she was 18 months old and is over $12,000 behind in child support, yet he won't sign his rights over because it's what I want? Never mind he has 2 other kids and a 4th on the way... |
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 Chin Hairs
Posts: 1028
Location: Indiana | I would only keep it if I had kids, and really would go back if I had only been married a year. Everyone's different though.
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Curiosity only???