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 Extreme Veteran
Posts: 396
 
Location: Oregon | Do anyone have a boyfriend or husband that chews??
Thoughts?! |
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  Ms. Marine
Posts: 4626
 
Location: Texas | My husband use to. I've dated guys who have. What do you want thoughts on? |
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 Expert
Posts: 4121
Location: SE Louisiana | Do the same thing. See how he likes it.. |
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Member
Posts: 24
Location: FL | My husband does, as do all of our buddies. For his health, I would love for him to quit; but I knew it was part of the package when we started dating & it wasn't a dealbreaker. The only thing I ask is that he keep up with his bottles/cups! |
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Member
Posts: 24
Location: FL | komet. - 2014-12-20 10:58 PM
Do the same thing. See how he likes it..
Lol, I used to have that mindset. Unfortunately, quite a few men around here think it contributes to a girls "bad-assery". No thanks hoss. |
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Expert
Posts: 4121
Location: SE Louisiana | CalamityKate - 2014-12-20 11:08 PM
komet. - 2014-12-20 10:58 PM
Do the same thing. See how he likes it..
Lol, I used to have that mindset. Unfortunately, quite a few men around here think it contributes to a girls "bad-assery". No thanks hoss.
Find a flavor he hates :)
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 396
Location: Oregon | Well I met a guy and we have been talking for couple weeks and going to meet soon. He's chewed since he was 12....
I've never dated a chewer. He also smokes on occasion but he said he stopping the smoking. I told him I won't date a smoker for sure and very hesitant about a chewer. He said I'll stop the smoking thats the easy one but chewing will be hard since he's done that for years.
Just like how gross is it and is it all over their teeth?!? I mean it's bad and not sure if it's a deal breaker but smoking I told him def is.
Edited by Luvmyebstang 2014-12-20 11:17 PM
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Member
Posts: 24
Location: FL | It's only all over their teeth if they're pigs. Lol. My husband usually swishes a drink around after he unpacks his lip and it's not a problem. Its A LOT better than kissing a smoker if you don't smoke.
On a serious note though, don't go into a new relationship expecting to eventually change a man's habits. It's not fair for either party. |
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 Dancing in my Mind
Posts: 3062
Location: Eastern OH but my heart is in WV | My bother, who I love dearly, chews. I can NOT understand his logic... for YEARS my brother and I battled with my dad to stop smoking... we begged, pleaded, & his health was an ISSUE.... We lost my dad 11 years ago, mainly to MS but the smoking did not help him. And now...my brother chews. His teeth are literally rioting out of his mouth and what is left are mostly black. It is gross and sicking. Oooh...and the kicker... my brother works in the medical field.
So my thoughts... GROSS, GROSS, GROSS (there is NOTHING sexy about those spit bottles sitting around everywhere either).
It would be a deal breaker for me. |
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 396
Location: Oregon | Yeah it's like I have no idea since I've never dated a chewer. I def WILL NOT kiss a smoker though and also cuz it bothers my asthma I can't breathe around smokers. He said he is discreet about
It but idk!! I'm not trying to change him but he knows straight up I'm not a fan and not sure if I would date him fully. He wants to pursue me cuz he's very interested but idk I guess I'll have to see once we hang a few times whether it's ok with me or not. Do any of you allow it but say only when you're not around?? |
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 Total Germophobe
Posts: 6437
Location: Montana | My dad does on occasion...my mom doesn't like, it doesn't really bother me. It wouldn't be a deal breaker for me. It seems like I almost always attract guys who smoke (of course I don't find out until I know them better)...while that isn't exactly a deal breaker for me, I'd prefer they didn't as I had a grandmother die of lung cancer. But right now I'd settle for cute even if he did chew, LOL.
Edited by mtcanchazer 2014-12-21 12:14 AM
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 No Tune in a Bucket
Posts: 2935
Location: Texas | My husband started dipping snuff when he was in high school. I hated it. It is a nasty habit any way you look at it and expensive. He quit cold turkey after about 30 years and started sucking on peppermints. Almost ruined his teeth but it was better than snuff. He switched to sugerfree gum and I am much happier. A smoker would have been a deal breaker.
Edited by RocketPilot 2014-12-21 12:13 AM
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 396
Location: Oregon | I agree! A smoker is def a deal breaker for me too!! That's why I straight up told him the smoking is a no go, but chewing idk why. I'm curios too like when you get close and intimate what that's like with the chewing haha it
Do you say not for 3 days before! Lol |
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 Serious Snap Trapper
Posts: 4275
Location: In The Snow, AZ | My hubbs chews.... So do I. My teeth are clean, white and all in tact. Never had a cavity. Never lost a tooth. Never let it sit in my teeth. But yes, I chew. Gross? Ya. Unhealthy. Yep. But you would never know I chewed. So judge me. |
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Expert
Posts: 1477
Location: In the land of peanuts and cotton | I can tolerate a chewer but defiantly not a smoker. As long as I don't see it I'm good. Spitting into a bottle is better than on the ground when your in public but spitting into a cup is even better that way I don't have to see the juices. |
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Red Bull Agressive
Posts: 5981
Location: North Dakota | My uncle chews, so I've been around it but never in a relationship. Being in a relationship with a chewer would bother me because the thought of them developing "hairy tongue" from it would haunt me.
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 Dog Resuce Agent
Posts: 3459
Location: southeast Texas | Some of the guys at work chew. They leave spit cups, spit bottles, spit cans. Yuck |
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 Accident Prone
Posts: 22277
Location: 100 miles from Nowhere, AR | My husband quit 2 weeks before we met. He's had an occasional lapse, but making the decision on his own to quit made it stick better, I think. Smoking would have been a deal breaker, dipping was not, although I wouldn't kiss on anyone with that crap in their mouths. Yuck. |
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 Warmblood with Wings
Posts: 27846
Location: Florida.. | Luvmyebstang - 2014-12-21 2:27 AM I agree! A smoker is def a deal breaker for me too!! That's why I straight up told him the smoking is a no go, but chewing idk why. I'm curios too like when you get close and intimate what that's like with the chewing haha it Do you say not for 3 days before! Lol
does he brush is teeth? I think its gross to but all of my cowboy friends do it.. its in their lip .. id not date a smoker so this doesnt bother me but i would not kiss him if he hasnt cleaned his mouth out.lol.. and oh never drink from a bottle unless you know its yours and has been with you. you cant pick and choose.. if you date then its who he is..cant expect to make rules this soon |
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 Too Skinny
Posts: 8009
Location: LA Lower Alabama | I'm grossed out by spitting so the thought of bottles and cups laying around with it makes me gag. Just pick and choose when you kiss or make him go brush his teeth. I can't imagine having to stop an in the moment moment for someone to rid themselves of that mess. It's a deal breaker for me. |
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 Expert
Posts: 2276
Location: ohio-in my own little world with pretty ponies :) | I grew up with my dad dipping so it didn't bother me when I met my boyfriend who also dips. I wish he would quit for his health but it wouldn't be a deal breaker for me. Smoking would be though...I can't stand smoking. |
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 Sock eating dog owner
Posts: 4553
Location: Where the pavement ends and the West begins Utah | If he chews long enough the chances of getting lip cancer is very good and it also stretches the lip to give him the ugly bulge. Hope he dont swallow as it also hardens the arteries. Seen it happen
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 Peecans
| My husband does, honistly dont care. He does not have spit cups or anything lying around. He flushes it down the toilet when he's done, i never see it in his teeth never taste it ever.
Acatualy the only reason i know he does it is i throw empty cans away as he still like a 12 year old little boy hides them in his shirt drawer ... i dont get that habit i guess lol
Its not cheep around here, but neither are my horses ha! Everybody's got a guilty pleasure thats his. |
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 503
| My fiance used to chew before I met him. Thank god he quit because it would be a deal breaker for me. Disgusting habit, number one and number two, what if I end up wanting to spend my life with him and he develops mouth cancer? Nooo thank you. |
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 Expert
Posts: 1482
Location: on my horse | I guess I'm either not very picky or not very health conscious lol I dated a chewer for a long time lived with him for almost a year before we dated (just good friends) shared drinks etc. and it never bothered me, he wasn't exactly a "clean" chewer either you definitely knew when he had his lip packed but I figured that sharing a drink and occasionally swallowing a "chunk" probably wouldn't kill me and he was a great guy. We're still good friends actually  |
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 Expert
Posts: 2041
Location: home for the winter...what a dumb idea | Huge deal breaker for me....my dad chews and it is gross......could never date or marry a guy that chewed....my SO started chewing that beaver mint chew crap when he was up all night plowing snow....just as bad ...only up side was he never had bad breath.... |
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 Mature beyond Years
Posts: 10780
Location: North of the 49th Parallel | I'm pretty sure close to every guy I've dated has chewed. Doesn't bother me at all. One of my ex's did smoke some and that bothered me a little bit but he never smelled like smoke so I never said anything. |
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 I Don't Brag
Posts: 6960
| Hubby was a 2 pack a day smoker when I met him. He gave away his last cigarette and quit cold turkey sometime before we got married. I never asked him to and he didn't tell me until years later that he quit mostly because he knew that I didn't care for it. At the time he said it had become too much of a habit. He continued to dip which didn't bother me as much as long as he cleaned his own spittoons. He didn't so spit in to a paper cup (lined with Kleenex or napkin to prevent spillage) or pop bottle. I second the warning to make sure you know which bottle or can of soda is yours! NOTHING is grosser than taking a swig spit! (makes me gag as I type).
Mostly he would dip while driving (an OTR truck driver) or while outside working. He maybe used a can a week and would end up throwing out half of that because it dried out. Kissing him was never an issue if you don't try a soul kiss when he has a dip in!
I never asked him to quit either habit. I worried about his health but figured it was HIS call. He has since quit dipping (about a year ago) as he was getting heartburn and dipping wasn't worth the discomfort.
As bad habits go, it is one I can live with as long as he is clean about it. |
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 Midget Lover
Location: Kentucky | My husband chewed for 16 years. He chewed when we first met. He finally quit after his Dad (who also chewed) got throat cancer. He has been tobacco free for 4 years. He wants to start back up again because he gained quite a bit of weight when he stopped, but after he quit, there is no going back. I love the life of no spit bottles in my house and car! Plus he smells better. I swear that tobacco smell oozed from his pores, it was disgusting. |
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 Money Eating Baggage Owner
Posts: 9586
Location: Phoenix | My boyfriend chews and smokes--But in moderation. He usually chews while playing his video games late at night and he's very good about brushing his teeth before he kisses me and he hides his chew containers. He only smokes 1-2 cigarettes a day, sometimes not at all. It's a habit he picked up when he started working his computer engineer job--everyone takes a smoke break. Again, he brushes his teeth and smokes outside so I never smell it. I always said I'd never date a smoker but it doesn't bother me anymore.
Edited by hammer_time 2014-12-21 7:08 PM
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 Chasin my Dream
Posts: 13651
Location: Alberta | My husband chews, but he knows not to try and kiss unless his mouth is empty....the spit bottles are the grossest and he gets crap for them if he leaves them around......the cost up here of a tin is $26 YES that's beyond stupid!!!! |
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 396
Location: Oregon | Well he said he hasn't smoked in about a week now and I didn't tell him to stop. I just said smoking is a def deal breaker and I can't be around it anyways because it bothers my asthma and it's nasty smelling! He actually told me today that he stood by a guy at work that was smoking and said he had to walk away cuz the guy reeked of smoke and he could smell it now, how nasty it was. I said its your choice but I can't do a smoker. The chew he knows would probably bother me and again I told him its your life and up to you, only you can make a decision. I said guys won't change unless HE wants too. He said well I want to pursue a relationship hopefully with you so I stopped smoking and working on keeping them away but chewing will be hard as I've done it for years...(since he was 12).
I just don't know cuz like I said never been around one or dated one....
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"Heck's Coming With Me"
Posts: 10794
Location: Kansas | Visions of brown spit dribbling down the ole chin.
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 Extreme Veteran
Posts: 461
Location: Illinois | My husband chews. He has done it since he played baseball in high school. He quit when we got together because I told him if I was going to quit smoking he was going to quit chewing. Over the years we have both gone back and forth. It doesn't really bother me that he chews except for the health part. I don't ever notice it in his teeth or anything. He mainly does it driving to and from work. |
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 Undercover Amish Mafia Member
Posts: 9991
Location: Kansas | It never has bothered me.....unless they leave their spit bottles all over the place. And i also think it's nasty when it gets in their teeth...I will not kiss someone who has chew in their teeth LOL! |
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 Good Grief!
Posts: 6343
Location: Cap'n Joan Rotgut.....alberta | my so chews, has for years and its not my place to tell him to stop....... he doesn't spit so no bottles laying around.....................to each his or her own.................
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 Ima Fickle Fan
Posts: 3547
Location: Texas | I think it's best to have an opinion about it before dating. That way you don't go into it thinking they'll change for you.
Chewing and smoking were deal breakers for me. I picked up enough spit cups from my roommate's friends to make me say "Heck no" to dating someone who did it. Not only that, when those cups spilled, etc., OMG talk about gross.
We have friends who do and are discreet about it. But it was a deal breaker for me. That was one of the first things I found out about my hubby when we were dating. Since I knew how I felt, I could move on before feelings were involved. |
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 490
| ~BINGO~ - 2014-12-21 2:00 AM
My hubbs chews.... So do I. My teeth are clean, white and all in tact. Never had a cavity. Never lost a tooth. Never let it sit in my teeth. But yes, I chew. Gross? Ya. Unhealthy. Yep. But you would never know I chewed. So judge me.
I dip the pouches. A friend gave me one about 4 years ago and I have done it off and on since now. Most people don't realize I dip and I am ok with that. I usually do it when I am driving home from work. Its an hour drive one way for me. My husband was a smoker. We married in april of 13. He promised me he would stop. After 39 years I knew it would be difficult for him. In February of this year I bought him an E-cig and he hasn't smoked a real cigarette since then. I am SO proud of him. He says some days the urge to smoke is bad but he likes being able to smell and taste things now. |
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 I Chore in Chucks
Posts: 2882
Location: MD | trying to change him before you all are even dating, regardless if it's for his health or not, is a terrible idea. obviously you don't like him THAT much that you're letting the fact that he dips interfere with him as an individual. get over that issue or move on. That's not a great foundation for your relationship IMO |
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Expert
Posts: 4121
Location: SE Louisiana | Jazz's Girl - 2014-12-22 10:13 AM
~BINGO~ - 2014-12-21 2:00 AM
My hubbs chews.... So do I. My teeth are clean, white and all in tact. Never had a cavity. Never lost a tooth. Never let it sit in my teeth. But yes, I chew. Gross? Ya. Unhealthy. Yep. But you would never know I chewed. So judge me.
I dip the pouches. A friend gave me one about 4 years ago and I have done it off and on since now. Most people don't realize I dip and I am ok with that. I usually do it when I am driving home from work. Its an hour drive one way for me. My husband was a smoker. We married in april of 13. He promised me he would stop. After 39 years I knew it would be difficult for him. In February of this year I bought him an E-cig and he hasn't smoked a real cigarette since then. I am SO proud of him. He says some days the urge to smoke is bad but he likes being able to smell and taste things now.
I've tried the Snus before. I've been thinking about switching to those to get away from smoking. They work well to kill the urge to light up. |
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Good Grief!
Posts: 6343
Location: Cap'n Joan Rotgut.....alberta | Crowned Image - 2014-12-23 9:14 AM trying to change him before you all are even dating, regardless if it's for his health or not, is a terrible idea. obviously you don't like him THAT much that you're letting the fact that he dips interfere with him as an individual. get over that issue or move on. That's not a great foundation for your relationship IMO
winner winner chicken dinner....
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 Shipwrecked and Flat Out Zapped
Posts: 16390
Location: DUMPING CATS AND PIGS IN TEXAS :) | mruggles - 2014-12-22 10:57 AM Crowned Image - 2014-12-23 9:14 AM trying to change him before you all are even dating, regardless if it's for his health or not, is a terrible idea. obviously you don't like him THAT much that you're letting the fact that he dips interfere with him as an individual. get over that issue or move on. That's not a great foundation for your relationship IMO winner winner chicken dinner....
m
This is what I'm thinking too. Trying to change someone before you actually meet him.....you'll have him running the other way in no time. Trying to change someone period, usually back fires. |
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Undercover Amish Mafia Member
Posts: 9991
Location: Kansas | LRQHS - 2014-12-22 11:12 AM mruggles - 2014-12-22 10:57 AM Crowned Image - 2014-12-23 9:14 AM trying to change him before you all are even dating, regardless if it's for his health or not, is a terrible idea. obviously you don't like him THAT much that you're letting the fact that he dips interfere with him as an individual. get over that issue or move on. That's not a great foundation for your relationship IMO winner winner chicken dinner....
m
I agree.....I wouldn't want a man trying to change who I am, so I don't expect the same. |
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 Own It and Move On
Location: The edge of no where | Whatever happened to going on a date with someone to figure out if you liked them or not? I'm kinda surprised he's still interested in meeting someone that's wanting him to change....but doesn't even know him. Chewing might be the least of his issues, or he might be a great guy that it's his worst habit. |
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Member
Posts: 22
Location: Kansas | Smoking or chewing isn't and hasn't ever been deal breaker for me. We all have habits that aren't always becoming but the point of dating is to find people who can deal with them. In my opinion if you like the guy you should date him to see if his chewing is a problem for you. No one says you have to jump into a serious relationship right away. Go on a couple of dates before deciding if it's a deal breaker for you or not. |
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Shipwrecked and Flat Out Zapped
Posts: 16390
Location: DUMPING CATS AND PIGS IN TEXAS :) | Out of curiosity, how old are you? |
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 396
Location: Oregon | I'm not trying to change him.....
Guys will do what they want. He just brought it up and asked what my opinions were and I told him. I said you can do what you want but here is a deal breaker (smoking) and chewing I told him I'm not sure. I said you can do what you want so I'm not trying to change anything, just left it up to
Him. He seems very cool and we have so much in common. We have talked for hours on the phone and facetime lol. We have awesome convo and I've never had that before so I'm interested in seeing where it goes and I'll have to see if chewing gets to me or not. He said he's very discreet about it and it's not all over his teeth and that he rinses and uses mouth wash after. He said he does it at work and in his truck. but like I said I'm
Not asking him to change....
I'm 26 why?
Edited by Luvmyebstang 2014-12-22 12:17 PM
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Good Grief!
Posts: 6343
Location: Cap'n Joan Rotgut.....alberta | Luvmyebstang - 2014-12-23 11:13 AM I'm not trying to change him..... Guys will do what they want. He just brought it up and asked what my opinions were and I told him. I said you can do what you want but here is a deal breaker (smoking) and chewing I told him I'm not sure. I said you can do what you want so I'm not trying to change anything, just left it up to Him. He seems very cool and we have so much in common. We have talked for hours on the phone and facetime lol. We have awesome convo and I've never had that before so I'm interested in seeing where it goes and I'll have to see if chewing gets to me or not. He said he's very discreet about it and it's not all over his teeth and that he rinses and uses mouth wash after. He said he does it at work and in his truck. but like I said I'm Not asking him to change.... I'm 26 why? ..because as you get older (and wiser :)..you will come to realize that what you thought was a deal breaker may not be such a big deal...........good things are few and far between so enjoy them bad habits and all............dont make mountains out of mole hills
m
Edited by mruggles 2014-12-22 12:22 PM
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 Go Canada!
Posts: 2954
| I dated a guy that chewed, I didn't know he chewed when we started dating - but found out shortly after. It's not something I find particularly attractive, but I decided I liked him enough it wasn't a deal breaker. He was discrete about it though, and it wasn't an issue for us. |
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Go Canada!
Posts: 2954
| mruggles - 2014-12-22 12:21 PM Luvmyebstang - 2014-12-23 11:13 AM I'm not trying to change him..... Guys will do what they want. He just brought it up and asked what my opinions were and I told him. I said you can do what you want but here is a deal breaker (smoking) and chewing I told him I'm not sure. I said you can do what you want so I'm not trying to change anything, just left it up to Him. He seems very cool and we have so much in common. We have talked for hours on the phone and facetime lol. We have awesome convo and I've never had that before so I'm interested in seeing where it goes and I'll have to see if chewing gets to me or not. He said he's very discreet about it and it's not all over his teeth and that he rinses and uses mouth wash after. He said he does it at work and in his truck. but like I said I'm Not asking him to change.... I'm 26 why? ..because as you get older (and wiser :)..you will come to realize that what you thought was a deal breaker may not be such a big deal...........good things are few and far between so enjoy them bad habits and all............dont make mountains out of mole hills
m
I'm 27 and it took me awhile to realize this but it is very true. |
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Shipwrecked and Flat Out Zapped
Posts: 16390
Location: DUMPING CATS AND PIGS IN TEXAS :) | tj135 - 2014-12-22 12:34 PM mruggles - 2014-12-22 12:21 PM Luvmyebstang - 2014-12-23 11:13 AM I'm not trying to change him..... Guys will do what they want. He just brought it up and asked what my opinions were and I told him. I said you can do what you want but here is a deal breaker (smoking) and chewing I told him I'm not sure. I said you can do what you want so I'm not trying to change anything, just left it up to Him. He seems very cool and we have so much in common. We have talked for hours on the phone and facetime lol. We have awesome convo and I've never had that before so I'm interested in seeing where it goes and I'll have to see if chewing gets to me or not. He said he's very discreet about it and it's not all over his teeth and that he rinses and uses mouth wash after. He said he does it at work and in his truck. but like I said I'm Not asking him to change.... I'm 26 why? ..because as you get older (and wiser :)..you will come to realize that what you thought was a deal breaker may not be such a big deal...........good things are few and far between so enjoy them bad habits and all............dont make mountains out of mole hills
m
Exactly. |
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 Am I really the Weirdo?
Posts: 11181
Location: Kansas | I've dated guys who chewed and it doesn't really bother me, though it is very cool that Matt doesn't. In my experience, if they're a good guy at all, they'll stop you from kissing them when they have a dip in, and warn you before you steal their spit cup for a drink thinking its Dr Pepper LOL. I could not handle a smoker, and was VERY glad when Matt's parents both quit smoking so I never have to smell it at their house. My dad has chewed for years and I grew up around rodeos so I guess I'm just used to it. There are so many other habits that are way worse! |
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 396
Location: Oregon | You guys are very true! I know I'm young and I'm sure there are way worse things, but I do like him and willing to give him a chance. My mom said her dad chewed and it was nasty. I'm just thinking if we ever kiss if I'll smell it or I taste left overs lol, if he will stop me from kissing if he has one. He so far seems like a great guy and I'm excited about that.
Edited by Luvmyebstang 2014-12-22 12:52 PM
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Shipwrecked and Flat Out Zapped
Posts: 16390
Location: DUMPING CATS AND PIGS IN TEXAS :) | Luvmyebstang - 2014-12-22 12:48 PM You guys are very true! I know I'm young and I'm sure there are way worse things, but I do like him and willing to give him a chance. My mom said her dad chewed and it was nasty. I'm just thinking if we ever kiss if I'll smell it or I taste left overs lol, if he will stop me from kissing if he has one. He so far seems like a great guy and I'm excited about that.
Just don't puke on him. Good luck :) |
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Good Grief!
Posts: 6343
Location: Cap'n Joan Rotgut.....alberta | LRQHS - 2014-12-23 11:53 AM Luvmyebstang - 2014-12-22 12:48 PM You guys are very true! I know I'm young and I'm sure there are way worse things, but I do like him and willing to give him a chance. My mom said her dad chewed and it was nasty. I'm just thinking if we ever kiss if I'll smell it or I taste left overs lol, if he will stop me from kissing if he has one. He so far seems like a great guy and I'm excited about that. Just don't puke on him. Good luck :)
lrqhs..just gave you the best advice ever.............
lmao
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 396
Location: Oregon | Haha! Try not too! |
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 Thread Killer
Posts: 7543
| mruggles - 2014-12-22 1:21 PM
Luvmyebstang - 2014-12-23 11:13 AM I'm not trying to change him..... Guys will do what they want. He just brought it up and asked what my opinions were and I told him. I said you can do what you want but here is a deal breaker (smoking) and chewing I told him I'm not sure. I said you can do what you want so I'm not trying to change anything, just left it up to Him. He seems very cool and we have so much in common. We have talked for hours on the phone and facetime lol. We have awesome convo and I've never had that before so I'm interested in seeing where it goes and I'll have to see if chewing gets to me or not. He said he's very discreet about it and it's not all over his teeth and that he rinses and uses mouth wash after. He said he does it at work and in his truck. but like I said I'm Not asking him to change.... I'm 26 why? ..because as you get older (and wiser :)..you will come to realize that what you thought was a deal breaker may not be such a big deal...........good things are few and far between so enjoy them bad habits and all............dont make mountains out of mole hills
m
I watched 3 grandparents die from cancer due to smoking/tobacco. I'm going to go through again with my parents and watch them die the same way. It will never not be a big deal to me. |
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 396
Location: Oregon | My dad has smoked cigs since he was 17 ;(
Wish he would stop! |
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Thread Killer
Posts: 7543
| I DO agree with the wiser ladies here, though. Don't try to change people. I wouldn't appreciate anyone's attempts to change me and don't want to do that to anyone else- no matter how much I dislike a certain habbit. |
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 396
Location: Oregon | And again like I said before.....not trying to change him and never asked him too! |
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 Expert
Posts: 2457
| rodeowithjoker - 2014-12-22 12:45 PM I've dated guys who chewed and it doesn't really bother me, though it is very cool that Matt doesn't. In my experience, if they're a good guy at all, they'll stop you from kissing them when they have a dip in, and warn you before you steal their spit cup for a drink thinking its Dr Pepper LOL. I could not handle a smoker, and was VERY glad when Matt's parents both quit smoking so I never have to smell it at their house. My dad has chewed for years and I grew up around rodeos so I guess I'm just used to it. There are so many other habits that are way worse!
YUP!!! ^^
My fiance' has dipped since he was 16. Does it bother me? Naw. He's clean and conscientious about it. I wouldn't let mole hills turn into mountains. Go on a date with him and let other things, more important things, determine if you actually like him. |
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 Elite Veteran
Posts: 678
Location: Florida | Sorry...dealbreaker for me. I DON'T do tobacco, in ANY form. It's a disgusting habit. |
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 Road Rash Expert
Posts: 5501
Location: Near San Antonio, TX | kk65 - 2014-12-22 2:33 PM Sorry...dealbreaker for me. I DON'T do tobacco, in ANY form. It's a disgusting habit.
This is my thought as well. To me, smoking is horrifiically disgusting. More so than chewing tobacco. It isn't the chewing tobacco that bothers me so much, or the chew cups laying around, but more the dark teeth that most tobacco users have. Gross, gross, gross. The smell of dip... yuk. I just don't go all that. To each his own. Thankfully my husband doesn't nor never has used tobacco in any form. |
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 Golden Heart
Posts: 5662
Location: SD | My dad smoked and chewed for almost 50 years. I watched him slowly waste away over a span of 5 months as esophageal cancer (most likely caused by tobacco use) tried to eat him from the inside out. Tobacco killed him. It was so senseless and he realized that too late and regretted that he ever touched a cigarette clear back in the '50s. |
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 John Deere Green
Posts: 12272
Location: ~Kansas~ | I never would date a guy that chewed or smoked that was a HUGE deal breaker it's just nasty !!!!
I gave up drinking for my hubs :) |
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 Elite Veteran
Posts: 1062
Location: Probably On the Road to the Next Barrel Race! | you girls should have a set of non-negotiable deal breakers...tobacco in any form is gross, and has proven over and over again that it causes cancer. Also, your children will most likely take up the habit...can you live with that, a child or husband dying or, more likely, getting his tongue cut out becuase of cancer? I don't even understand you girls that don't set a high and deserving standard for yourself ....you'll get just what you demand and expect for yourself. Value yourself hghly enough to say no to tobacco. |
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Hungarian Midget Woman
Location: Midwest | CrossCreek - 2014-12-23 12:22 AM you girls should have a set of non-negotiable deal breakers...tobacco in any form is gross, and has proven over and over again that it causes cancer. Also, your children will most likely take up the habit...can you live with that, a child or husband dying or, more likely, getting his tongue cut out becuase of cancer? I don't even understand you girls that don't set a high and deserving standard for yourself ....you'll get just what you demand and expect for yourself. Value yourself hghly enough to say no to tobacco.
IME, you need to look at the WHOLE person. Sometimes great people may have a bad habit (heck, it's not like the guy is even doing something illegal here).
My father smoked for close to 30 years. As a kid, I knew he smoked, but I still to this day have never seen him smoke a cigarette. He did quit a number of years ago. Should my mom have never married my father because he smoked? She would have missed out on a wonderful, caring, and loyal man. I was never a smoker just because "my dad did it".
My husband chewed before we dated. He quit (though he slips sometimes). If I would have discounted him for that, I would have missed out on being married to a wonderful person. I have plenty of standards, but something nominal such as tobacco is just not as important to me as what type of person they are. I think in setting an absolute such as this, a person could miss out on connecting with someone wonderful.
However, if this really is something that will be a constant source of arguement, you are better off not dating the guy in the first place. |
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 Strong Willed Woman
Posts: 6577
Location: Prosser, WA | CrossCreek - 2014-12-22 10:22 PM
you girls should have a set of non-negotiable deal breakers...tobacco in any form is gross, and has proven over and over again that it causes cancer. Also, your children will most likely take up the habit...can you live with that, a child or husband dying or, more likely, getting his tongue cut out becuase of cancer? I don't even understand you girls that don't set a high and deserving standard for yourself ....you'll get just what you demand and expect for yourself. Value yourself hghly enough to say no to tobacco.
This post is a little silly. You can have high standards but still date a man that chews. My husband chewed when we first met. He is a great husband, father and provider for our family. He also stopped chewing almost 10 years ago. Glad I didn't walk away because he chewed tobacco. Yes it can cause cancer but it seems like if you live long enough you are probably going to get some form of cancer. So many other forms of death can take a loved one away in the blink of an eye that I wouldn't choose a person based on what may or may not kill them. |
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10D Crack Champion
| CrossCreek - 2014-12-23 12:22 AMyou girls should have a set of non-negotiable deal breakers...tobacco in any form is gross, and has proven over and over again that it causes cancer. Also, your children will most likely take up the habit...can you live with that, a child or husband dying or, more likely, getting his tongue cut out becuase of cancer? I don't even understand you girls that don't set a high and deserving standard for yourself ....you'll get just what you demand and expect for yourself. Value yourself hghly enough to say no to tobacco. The guy is chewing tobacco, not making meth in the garage. While it is a nasty habit that can lead to cancer, it does not make the guy a bad guy..... Just a guy with a bad habit. People have to weigh everything to see what they can and can't tolerate. There are some real jerks in the world who don't have nasty habits other than being jerks which is something they don't usually display until they get married. At least this habit is up front and in the open ahead of time. Some personality traits can be more miserable to deal with than a nasty chew cup and dirty teeth.
Edited by sodapop 2014-12-23 6:26 PM
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 Texas Tenderheart
Posts: 6715
Location: Red Raiderland | My husband and I have been together for 23 years and when I met him he dipped but after a few years he decided to quit. YAY! BUT, after 7 years of not dipping he got around some high school buddies and started again. It seems to bother me more now then back then but it's not that big of a deal. My DH is very discreet about it and puts it on the side of his mouth not in front so you don't even notice. God forbid if I have to fish something out of the trash, I will be cussing his name!  Healthwise i wish he would quit but its his ultimate decision. Im like a lot of others on here, no way would i put up with a smoker. |
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 396
Location: Oregon | Well so much for that guy!!! Ugh.... ;( ;(
He was so nice and sweet and so funny he made me laugh a lot and so happy! We could talk for all hours of the night and had an awesome connection. He had some bad news with his dad being a jerk and needing to find a place to live and turned into a dick!!! Went from a super sweet gentleman to a total jerk treating me like s@&!!! A totally different person....wtf. Now I'm hurt because I started some feelings for him ahhhh ;(
Why do I always find the a-holes, jerks and dicks that treat me like crap?!? So tired of this and getting hurt......
And the chewing didn't seem to bother me when we hung out..
Edited by Luvmyebstang 2014-12-31 4:33 PM
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 Veteran
Posts: 187
| My husband chews....I HATE it! It's disgusting and he always has a line on his lips. His teeth are starting to look gross too. (He just turned 31) He has chewed since I met him when he was 14 and I was 12. He knows I WILL NOT kiss him if he has a dip in. He does try not to do it when me and our 3 year old are around, and he will not ask me to get him some if he is out! He did quit for a year when I first moved in with him, but he started bumming smokes off his co worker and I caught on. We finally agreed to disagree. I absolutely hate it and he knows it. That is the only thing I truely dislike about him. |
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No Tune in a Bucket
Posts: 2935
Location: Texas | Luvmyebstang - 2014-12-31 4:28 PM Well so much for that guy!!! Ugh.... ;( ;( He was so nice and sweet and so funny he made me laugh a lot and so happy! We could talk for all hours of the night and had an awesome connection. He had some bad news with his dad being a jerk and needing to find a place to live and turned into a dick!!! Went from a super sweet gentleman to a total jerk treating me like s@&!!! A totally different person....wtf. Now I'm hurt because I started some feelings for him ahhhh ;( Why do I always find the a-holes, jerks and dicks that treat me like crap?!? So tired of this and getting hurt...... And the chewing didn't seem to bother me when we hung out..
Sorry it ended badly. Keep looking with an open mind and you will find that right somebody. |
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 Ace Ventura Pet Detective
Posts: 2409
Location: Wisconsin | DISCUSTING..enough said. Thank goodness my husband never jumped on that band wagon..however son did..must be a Army Pilot thing...and believe me he heard my thoughts loud and clear. |
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 396
Location: Oregon | Yeah I apparently suck at picking the right guys for me....
Where are the nice ones!! |
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Go Get Em!
Posts: 13502
Location: OH. IO | I cant help but laugh that you were worried about chew when your last reply on his behavior was filthier than any tobacco use lol. You didnt kiss him with that mouth did you? LOL |
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 396
Location: Oregon | No never kissed but he told me he wanted too.
I can't stop thinking of what it could've been :/ He also owes me $20 but ignores my calls...
Why won't he get out of my head?!
Edited by Luvmyebstang 2015-01-02 1:35 PM
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The Advice Guru
Posts: 6419
| Luvmyebstang - 2015-01-02 1:34 PM
No never kissed but he told me he wanted too.
I can't stop thinking of what it could've been :/ He also owes me $20 but ignores my calls...
Why won't he get out of my head?!
Let the 20.00 go
Quit calling him
Delete his number
You posting you are still trying to call him, you sound a little crazy |
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Shipwrecked and Flat Out Zapped
Posts: 16390
Location: DUMPING CATS AND PIGS IN TEXAS :) | I'm getting the clingy, needy vibe again. Not being ugly, you were evaluating, critiquing this guy before you even had a date with him. I told you back then, that he would run. Back off. Learn to be less controlling and more independent. |
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I Chore in Chucks
Posts: 2882
Location: MD | Luvmyebstang - 2015-01-01 5:28 AM
Yeah I apparently suck at picking the right guys for me....
Where are the nice ones!!
in the city, that's where I found mine ;) |
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 Expert
Posts: 1426
Location: Looking for someplace cooler | Asking a man to give up his chew is like asking a woman to give up her horses |
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 BHW Resident Surgeon
Posts: 25351
Location: Bastrop, Texas | I must have missed something. Why does he owe you $20? |
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 Loves to compete
Posts: 5760
Location: Oakdale, CA | I love second hand copenhagen..... Everyone I ever dated chewed it. so did my hubby but we had a son so he had to quit chewing because my son idolizes him.......So he quit. It was really hard but hey it can be done.........
It doesn't bother me if a man chews...... |
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Warmblood with Wings
Posts: 27846
Location: Florida.. | Bear - 2015-01-02 4:46 PM I must have missed something. Why does he owe you $20?
maybe to buy chew or toothbrush..? |
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Undercover Amish Mafia Member
Posts: 9991
Location: Kansas | Bear - 2015-01-02 3:46 PM I must have missed something. Why does he owe you $20?
I'm curious as well lol |
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 396
Location: Oregon | I only called him once!!! Chill lol I'm not crazy nor clingy gezzz. Left a voicemail saying nicely how he's immature and he proved me right and that I just want my $20 back and you'll never hear from me again.
He owed me $20 because for some reason his paycheck went on hold thru Usaa or whatever it's called and we were gonna go see XMAS lights at a race track. I wanted to go bad still and he said well if you dont mind paying I'll pay you back. Sooo yea I shouldn't have but I wanted to go.... Yea I was dumb I guess.....
I told him I wanted to meet up to talk and if he could bring my $20, he kept pretending he was ''still working'' late on New Year's Eve and sending me texts ''Im still here''..... Lol yea right I thought! Communication stopped and yup that's it. Immature ******* ...
Edited by Luvmyebstang 2015-01-03 1:45 PM
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The Advice Guru
Posts: 6419
| Luvmyebstang - 2015-01-03 1:42 PM
I only called him once!!! Chill lol I'm not crazy nor clingy gezzz. Left a voicemail saying nicely how he's immature and he proved me right and that I just want my $20 back and you'll never hear from me again.
He owed me $20 because for some reason his paycheck went on hold thru Usaa or whatever it's called and we were gonna go see XMAS lights at a race track. I wanted to go bad still and he said well if you dont mind paying I'll pay you back. Sooo yea I shouldn't have but I wanted to go.... Yea I was dumb I guess.....
I told him I wanted to meet up to talk and if he could bring my $20, he kept pretending he was ''still working'' late on New Year's Eve and sending me texts ''Im still here''..... Lol yea right I thought! Communication stopped and yup that's it. Immature ******* ...
The first post you said he wouldn't return your CALLS, this means more then once.
Also word of advice, if you actually want belongings/money returned, don't leave a voicemail saying he is immature then you ask him to meet you somewhere to talk, he did what every guy would have deleted it.
Sorry this happened to you, but take the time reflect back and learn from the experience.
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 I am Woman hear me Roar
Posts: 3395
Location: Choctaw, Oklahoma | I found my husband on EHarmony. and I'm not ashamed!!
you can be picky as you want to be. I chose: educated, makes money, owns his own home, no tobacco and no kids. I wouldn't trade him for the world!!
Don't be taken a fool by losers my dear. They are everywhere. |
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 396
Location: Oregon | It was only one call. I asked him to meet before I left that voicemail and he agreed to but soon flaked out and I knew he would..
I didn't leave that voicemail until after he stopped texting and saying he was stilll working and couldn't meet yet.
It was clearly obvious he was ignoring and seeing if I would let it go , so that's when I left the voicemail.
I should've never paid for that but I made a dumb mistake so what can Ya do :/
Edited by Luvmyebstang 2015-01-03 10:09 PM
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 Extreme Veteran
Posts: 432
Location: Tennessee | Honestly if I paid for a "date" and then things went sour for whatever reason, no way in hel| would I ask for the money back, especially $20. Dignity and pride do have a price....JMO though. |
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 A Barrel Of Monkeys
Posts: 12972
Location: Texas | kdb2qq - 2015-01-04 12:21 AM Honestly if I paid for a "date" and then things went sour for whatever reason, no way in hel| would I ask for the money back, especially $20. Dignity and pride do have a price....JMO though.
Wise words. |
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 Chicken Chick
Posts: 3562
Location: Texas | I smoke... and I hate it by the way. There isn't really any part of it I enjoy. I am just weak, and weird for not being able to stop doing something I hate.
Anyway, that being said I can not stand dipping. My dad dips, and I have mistaken tooooo many spit cups for my Dr.Pepper when I was growing up. He was bad about "Oh I thought you were done with it." No... no I wasn't. You just moved it, and I found it and thought about how nice it would be to drink my coke... Thanks though.  Or taking out the trash and being covered in spit juice because it was leaking out the bottom of the bag and I didn't realize it. He tries to spit in my trash can when he comes over and I make him go outside.
He has also ruined me from anything that smells like peaches, somehow peaches smell like Copenhagen to me and I gag. |
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 Fact Checker
Posts: 16572
Location: Displaced Iowegian | Fun2Run - 2015-01-04 12:25 AM kdb2qq - 2015-01-04 12:21 AM Honestly if I paid for a "date" and then things went sour for whatever reason, no way in hel| would I ask for the money back, especially $20. Dignity and pride do have a price....JMO though. Wise words.
^^^^ THIS...........Gees, it's ONLY $20.....forget it and MOVE ON but hopefully, you learned a lesson or two! |
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 396
Location: Oregon | I have moved on!
I have learned from him. Don't pay for a date if a dumbass can't lol.
He's an idiot ass.
On a another side not....what do you all think about a guy a few years younger interested in you?? Anyone have a bf or husband few years younger?
I've always gone older because of maturity and time in life we are at in 20's. Last a hole was 22 and I tried younger and that went bad...
Edited by Luvmyebstang 2015-01-05 7:00 PM
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Member
Posts: 39
Location: Texarkana | Luvmyebstang - 2015-01-05 6:57 PM I have moved on! I have learned from him. Don't pay for a date if a dumbass can't lol. He's an idiot ass. On a another side not....what do you all think about a guy a few years younger interested in you?? Anyone have a bf or husband few years younger? I've always gone older because of maturity and time in life we are at in 20's. Last a hole was 22 and I tried younger and that went bad...
I think you need to quit acting so desperate. Just because someone looks at you, or says hello, or opens a door for you does NOT automatically mean they are your next "one and only". By reading some of your prior posts, and even this one, I think you lack self confidence, and are very clingy. Guys pick up on that very quickly, and RUN as fast as they can. It seems like its hard for you to take the hint when they arent interested. |
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 40Somethings
Posts: 4596
Location: Jacksonville, FL | My husband is younger. 20 years younger. |
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 Toastest with the Mostest
Posts: 5712
Location: That part of Texas | Luvmyebstang - 2015-01-05 6:57 PM I have moved on! I have learned from him. Don't pay for a date if a dumbass can't lol. He's an idiot ass.
Actually the lesson was that (1) he's just not into you and (2) he doesn't know how to say it other than avoid you. He's not the best in the communication department but many guys aren't. If he's into you, $20 is nothing that he can't and won't beg, borrow or sell something to get if it means spending time with you. That's what I hope you learn to see. Lord knows it took me long enough myself when I was younger. |
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 Hawty & Nawty
Posts: 20424
| My husband shoves Barbie's Kotex in his mouth. Only a few of you will get this. I
OP aren't you the same lady that wanted to ask the workout dude out last year but was afraid to get his number? |
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 396
Location: Oregon | I'm not desperate by any means. I've just run into some bad guys and trying to find the good ones. I'm ready to settle down and have a family...doesn't make me desperate. I have a lot of confidence ....I'm a redhead lol so it's in my blood, so please don't act like you know me by saying I lack it or am clingy. I'm very independent, own a business I started, and know what I want. I don't give attention to every guy interested in me. I'm picky and always have been. What's wrong with an independent woman ready to settle down and knows what she wants and goes for it?!
Edited by Luvmyebstang 2015-01-06 4:54 AM
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Shipwrecked and Flat Out Zapped
Posts: 16390
Location: DUMPING CATS AND PIGS IN TEXAS :) | Luvmyebstang - 2015-01-06 4:51 AM I'm not desperate by any means. I've just run into some bad guys and trying to find the good ones. I'm ready to settle down and have a family...doesn't make me desperate. I have a lot of confidence ....I'm a redhead lol so it's in my blood, so please don't act like you know me by saying I lack it or am clingy. I'm very independent, own a business I started, and know what I want. I don't give attention to every guy interested in me. I'm picky and always have been. What's wrong with an independent woman ready to settle down and knows what she wants and goes for it?!
Your posts say differently and we are trying to help you.
From what I read, the problem is you and you need to address you before you look for another boyfriend. You act needy and clingy in your posts here. You obsess over little things like chew, $20, etc. Being independent in other areas of your life does not make you independent when it comes to dating. Kudos for having a business and working. What I see from all of your previous posts and this one is that you blame every man for it not working. At some point, you need to realize that it may not be the guys fault, it may be yours.
I would suggest for you to stop "looking for a guy." Go to a book store and find you some self help relationship books. Fix your neediness for a "husband, boyfriend, family." Don't see stars everytime a man looks at you. Learn to love yourself. Be happy and work on yourself. Until you work on yourself, I don't see you finding anyone. You're looking for a fairy tale and this isn't Fantasy Land.
None of this is meant to sound harsh. I'm trying to help you from what I have read on all of your posts. If I'm wrong, I apologize and good luck....because you're going to need it.
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Midget Lover
Location: Kentucky | notwhouthink - 2015-01-05 10:42 PM Luvmyebstang - 2015-01-05 6:57 PM I have moved on! I have learned from him. Don't pay for a date if a dumbass can't lol. He's an idiot ass. On a another side not....what do you all think about a guy a few years younger interested in you?? Anyone have a bf or husband few years younger? I've always gone older because of maturity and time in life we are at in 20's. Last a hole was 22 and I tried younger and that went bad... I think you need to quit acting so desperate. Just because someone looks at you, or says hello, or opens a door for you does NOT automatically mean they are your next "one and only". By reading some of your prior posts, and even this one, I think you lack self confidence, and are very clingy. Guys pick up on that very quickly, and RUN as fast as they can. It seems like its hard for you to take the hint when they arent interested.
PREACH !!! |
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 Elite Veteran
Posts: 700
Location: Driving, Grooming, or Saddling for a Kid! | notwhouthink - 2015-01-05 8:42 PM Luvmyebstang - 2015-01-05 6:57 PM I have moved on! I have learned from him. Don't pay for a date if a dumbass can't lol. He's an idiot ass. On a another side not....what do you all think about a guy a few years younger interested in you?? Anyone have a bf or husband few years younger? I've always gone older because of maturity and time in life we are at in 20's. Last a hole was 22 and I tried younger and that went bad... I think you need to quit acting so desperate. Just because someone looks at you, or says hello, or opens a door for you does NOT automatically mean they are your next "one and only". By reading some of your prior posts, and even this one, I think you lack self confidence, and are very clingy. Guys pick up on that very quickly, and RUN as fast as they can. It seems like its hard for you to take the hint when they arent interested.
 This ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ |
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Fact Checker
Posts: 16572
Location: Displaced Iowegian | LRQHS - 2015-01-06 7:33 AM Luvmyebstang - 2015-01-06 4:51 AM I'm not desperate by any means. I've just run into some bad guys and trying to find the good ones. I'm ready to settle down and have a family...doesn't make me desperate. I have a lot of confidence ....I'm a redhead lol so it's in my blood, so please don't act like you know me by saying I lack it or am clingy. I'm very independent, own a business I started, and know what I want. I don't give attention to every guy interested in me. I'm picky and always have been. What's wrong with an independent woman ready to settle down and knows what she wants and goes for it?! Your posts say differently and we are trying to help you.
From what I read, the problem is you and you need to address you before you look for another boyfriend. You act needy and clingy in your posts here. You obsess over little things like chew, $20, etc. Being independent in other areas of your life does not make you independent when it comes to dating. Kudos for having a business and working. What I see from all of your previous posts and this one is that you blame every man for it not working. At some point, you need to realize that it may not be the guys fault, it may be yours.
I would suggest for you to stop "looking for a guy." Go to a book store and find you some self help relationship books. Fix your neediness for a "husband, boyfriend, family." Don't see stars everytime a man looks at you. Learn to love yourself. Be happy and work on yourself. Until you work on yourself, I don't see you finding anyone. You're looking for a fairy tale and this isn't Fantasy Land.
None of this is meant to sound harsh. I'm trying to help you from what I have read on all of your posts. If I'm wrong, I apologize and good luck....because you're going to need it.
^^^^ THIS........Nobody is trying to sound harsh but if most of us are "picking up" on certain patterns of behavior from your posts .... then it sure doesn't take a guy very long to see it and run...... |
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Serious Snap Trapper
Posts: 4275
Location: In The Snow, AZ | NJJ - 2015-01-06 8:03 AM LRQHS - 2015-01-06 7:33 AM Luvmyebstang - 2015-01-06 4:51 AM I'm not desperate by any means. I've just run into some bad guys and trying to find the good ones. I'm ready to settle down and have a family...doesn't make me desperate. I have a lot of confidence ....I'm a redhead lol so it's in my blood, so please don't act like you know me by saying I lack it or am clingy. I'm very independent, own a business I started, and know what I want. I don't give attention to every guy interested in me. I'm picky and always have been. What's wrong with an independent woman ready to settle down and knows what she wants and goes for it?! Your posts say differently and we are trying to help you.
From what I read, the problem is you and you need to address you before you look for another boyfriend. You act needy and clingy in your posts here. You obsess over little things like chew, $20, etc. Being independent in other areas of your life does not make you independent when it comes to dating. Kudos for having a business and working. What I see from all of your previous posts and this one is that you blame every man for it not working. At some point, you need to realize that it may not be the guys fault, it may be yours.
I would suggest for you to stop "looking for a guy." Go to a book store and find you some self help relationship books. Fix your neediness for a "husband, boyfriend, family." Don't see stars everytime a man looks at you. Learn to love yourself. Be happy and work on yourself. Until you work on yourself, I don't see you finding anyone. You're looking for a fairy tale and this isn't Fantasy Land.
None of this is meant to sound harsh. I'm trying to help you from what I have read on all of your posts. If I'm wrong, I apologize and good luck....because you're going to need it.
Unfortunate....but that's the impression I get as well. |
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 396
Location: Oregon | Well clingy etc are just not me! Sorry if it comes off that way but that's just not me. Talk to my friends and family that know me well. I asked for positive advice, not a rude beat down on someone because your life is crappy. I'm not needy one bit! I am independent when it comes to guys too, not just my business and such. I had many guys asking for my number but I've turned many away. I don't see stars with every guy that looks at me...trust me! I've just been ready for awhile to settle down. Everyone has issues and flaws to work on but I'm not in need of some books to read up lol. Why do people always assume it's not the guys it's you....I've just had bad luck finding the bad guys. That happens to a lot of women! I'm not perfect and no one is. And I hate clingy men and chew is not just nothing to
worry about it can kill you! I mean Ya it's bad habit and he could've bren a great guy and I wouldn't care but he wasn't. I mean yes we all have things to work on but I'm not some desperate clingy little girl...
If you met me in person you would think I'm 38 with my maturity level.
Edited by Luvmyebstang 2015-01-06 12:38 PM
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Shipwrecked and Flat Out Zapped
Posts: 16390
Location: DUMPING CATS AND PIGS IN TEXAS :) | Luvmyebstang - 2015-01-06 12:32 PM Well clingy etc are just not me! Sorry if it comes off that way but that's just not me. Talk to my friends and family that know me well. I asked for positive advice, not a rude beat down on someone because your life is crappy. I'm not needy one bit! I am independent when it comes to guys too, not just my business and such. I had many guys asking for my number but I've turned many away. I don't see stars wuth every guy that looks at me...trust me! I've just been ready for awhile to settle down. Everyone has issues and flaws to work on but I'm not in need of some books to read up lol. Why do people always assume it's not the guys it's you....I've just had bad luck finding the bad guys. That happens to a lot of women! I'm not perfect and no one is. And I hate clingy men. I mean yes we all have things to work on but I'm Not some desperate clingy little girl... If you met me in person you would think I'm 38 with my maturity level.
My life isn't crappy at all. No one is trying to beat you down. We are trying to help you. Sorry no one is saying what you want to hear. I'd have no problem saying it was the guy's fault if I saw it that way, but it doesn't come across that way in any of your posts....not one. At some point, you will have to step back and evaluate yourself. Good luck to you. We all wish you the best. |
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 396
Location: Oregon | This case it was him! He's super immature, only 22, and a big partier. He was a jerk to me...you weren't there.
I have things to work on, as do you, but in this case I was not the problem. He's a d bag hands down |
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Good Grief!
Posts: 6343
Location: Cap'n Joan Rotgut.....alberta |  
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Midget Lover
Location: Kentucky | Luvmyebstang - 2015-01-06 1:39 PM This case it was him! He's super immature, only 22, and a big partier. He was a jerk to me...you weren't there. I have things to work on, as do you, but in this case I was not the problem. He's a d bag hands down I think if you are looking for opinions/advice you shouldn't be attacking those trying to help you. LRQHS gave you some sound, sane, good advice. She wasn't attacking in any way.
Take a step back, breathe, and think about what you post before you click submit. A lot of these gals on here have lived and learned a lot of experiences and it's hard to see someone going down the same path, so they give up some pretty strong warnings. I would read each post carefully, ease up on the aggression, and put down your defenses.
Edited by Murphy 2015-01-06 12:43 PM
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Extreme Veteran
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Location: Oregon | Everyone has been thru experiences, I get that. There's no aggression here...you must be getting confused with the redhead side lol. I'm all good! I'm not going down some aweful path... |
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 Hugs to You
Posts: 7550
Location: In The Land of Cotton | Luvmyebstang - 2015-01-06 1:39 PM This case it was him! He's super immature, only 22, and a big partier. He was a jerk to me...you weren't there. I have things to work on, as do you, but in this case I was not the problem. He's a d bag hands down I have just now read some of this - if you are not the immature one - why all the language? D bag to me is immature language, the way you type is immature - hell, this whole thread is.
And, I bet you haven't learned a thing or took any of the good advice given.
Edited by 3canstorun 2015-01-06 12:48 PM
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 396
Location: Oregon | It's called being a redhead! I speak my word, don't hold back. Sorry if you don't get redheads. We are strong willed and very straight forward and call it how we see it. And yes I have learned a few things but some is just nonsense
Edited by Luvmyebstang 2015-01-06 12:50 PM
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Midget Lover
Location: Kentucky | Luvmyebstang - 2015-01-06 1:48 PM It's called being a redhead! I speak my word, don't hold back. Sorry if you don't get redheads. We are strong willed and very straight forward and call it how we see it.
Hair color has nothing to do with it. |
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Fact Checker
Posts: 16572
Location: Displaced Iowegian | Luvmyebstang - 2015-01-06 12:39 PM This case it was him! He's super immature, only 22, and a big partier. He was a jerk to me...you weren't there. I have things to work on, as do you, but in this case I was not the problem. He's a d bag hands down
MERCY.......dial it back a little........My first instinct was to post WHATEVER ! ! !
in this case, probably he was immature.....I think most here are referring to ALL of your threads over time. Most of us have been around the block a time or two and pick up on things........I hate it when people ask for opinions and then get p*thy when they get ones that they don't like. I wish you the best of luck .... |
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 396
Location: Oregon | Obviously you don't understand a redhead and yes it's in my blood. I'm firey and say it how it is. My personality comes from that.. |
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Hugs to You
Posts: 7550
Location: In The Land of Cotton | Luvmyebstang - 2015-01-06 1:48 PM It's called being a redhead! I speak my word, don't hold back. Sorry if you don't get redheads. We are strong willed and very straight forward and call it how we see it. And yes I have learned a few things but some is just nonsense
****, someone tell her I am a real red head. |
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 Veteran
Posts: 209
| I'm sorry but the color of your hair doesn't dictate your personality, not trying to be rude but you seem to use that as an excuse or reason for your very forward and defensive tendencies. I'm a blonde but I don't go around saying I'm using it as a reason if I'm forgetful or unintelligent.
And just another piece of advice, don't be in such a hurry to settle down, take your time and really find the right person, but don't be in such a big search to find him and for things to happen, life doesn't always work that way. |
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 396
Location: Oregon | Lol!
Yes being a redhead does tell your personality! We are very firey, strong willed, very opinionated, spontaneous etc! We are not like blondes or brunettes. We are a different breed and it has everything to do with that redheaded personality! Only a redhead would understand, others are clueless.
Look up redhead personalities and traits!
Edited by Luvmyebstang 2015-01-06 1:00 PM
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 Chatty Kathy
Posts: 6634
Location: In Ky following Barrel Races & Walker hounds. | Luvmyebstang - 2015-01-06 12:57 PM
Lol!
Yes being a redhead does tell your personality! We are very firey, strong willed, very opinionated, spontaneous etc! We are not like blondes or brunettes. We are a different breed and it has everything to do with that redheaded personality! Only a redhead would understand, others are clueless.
Look up redhead personalities and traits!
Im redheaded... I don't blame my actions on my hair color... you have mentioned your hair color now 5 times, and nobody is buying that excuse. |
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Midget Lover
Location: Kentucky |  |
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Fact Checker
Posts: 16572
Location: Displaced Iowegian | Luvmyebstang - 2015-01-06 12:57 PM Lol! Yes being a redhead does tell your personality! We are very firey, strong willed, very opinionated, spontaneous etc! We are not like blondes or brunettes. We are a different breed and it has everything to do with that redheaded personality! Only a redhead would understand, others are clueless. Look up redhead personalities and traits!
Being a "redhead" is NOT the worst part of your personality.......keep diggin' that hole! |
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 396
Location: Oregon | It's not an excuse lol. You guys like to pull the excuse card just because...how silly! Not blaming anything on my hair...
Maybe you're a boring redhead... 
Edited by Luvmyebstang 2015-01-06 1:06 PM
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Good Grief!
Posts: 6343
Location: Cap'n Joan Rotgut.....alberta | m
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Chatty Kathy
Posts: 6634
Location: In Ky following Barrel Races & Walker hounds. | ex·cuse
verb
ik'skyo?oz/
1.
attempt to lessen the blame attaching to (a fault or offense); seek to defend or justify. |
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Hugs to You
Posts: 7550
Location: In The Land of Cotton | I think I am going to take advice from people here on BHW - since I am a red head I get to have an out of control personality.
But, crud, we are just boring red heads. Try telling that to my husband and family.
Edited by 3canstorun 2015-01-06 1:11 PM
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Chatty Kathy
Posts: 6634
Location: In Ky following Barrel Races & Walker hounds. | 3canstorun - 2015-01-06 1:08 PM
I think I am going to take advice from people here on BHW - since I am a red head I get to have an out of control personality. Sarah, you with me?
But, crud, we are just boring red heads. Try telling that to my husband and family.
Lets go! We can be nuts now, but thats okay, we can blame it on our hair. |
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Hugs to You
Posts: 7550
Location: In The Land of Cotton | I guess I am the bad one though. Because I do crazy blond on top of the bright red. So, I can be forgetful and then go crazy.
However, I won't make any excuses. |
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Fact Checker
Posts: 16572
Location: Displaced Iowegian | Luvmyebstang - 2015-01-06 1:04 PM It's not an excuse lol. You guys like to pull the excuse card just because...how silly! Not blaming anything on my hair... Maybe you're a boring redhead...
OR....................
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 396
Location: Oregon | Personality... You're still confused ;)
It's all good fun! |
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Thread Killer
Posts: 7543
| Still wouldn't date a smoker/chewer....
.....but what in the sweet January black ice did I just read.
Cabin fever, it's strong up in here. |
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 396
Location: Oregon | Haha! |
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Shipwrecked and Flat Out Zapped
Posts: 16390
Location: DUMPING CATS AND PIGS IN TEXAS :) | My bad, that guy was a real D-bag. |
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I am Woman hear me Roar
Posts: 3395
Location: Choctaw, Oklahoma | I'll say it again. Quit looking in all the wrong places. Go on eharmony. And be picky. And for the love of all things good and holy quit saying it's ALL because of your hair color. It tones down you're maturity level. |
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 Elite Veteran
Posts: 1182
Location: Do I hear Banjos? | Wow...this has been pure entertainment!
Things I have learned:
- If you have to tell people you have the maturity of a 38 year old...it's likely because your posts make you sound like a teenager
- If you have to repeatedly declare your hair color as a defining reason for your entire psyche...you may want to visit Miss Clairol and try a more calm, logical auburn shade (works for this girl)
Honestly...no one wants to attack you for your apparent personality traits or denigrate you for being a ginger. Folks on here are an excellent sounding board and will call it how they see it...with little or no harm intended. Questions get asked and answered. Take the advice/insight offered...or don't. But keep posting as I truly have needed the levity today. |
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Hawty & Nawty
Posts: 20424
| When things don't work out, its usually a 50/50 situation. Let this go. Come back and be part of the fun. |
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 Elite Veteran
Posts: 617
Location: London Ontario | This is why I love BHW...more people need to be like you guys and tell it the way it is....if you ask for advice, be prepared for what you will get...I actually got a kick out of this post! Thanks for passing the time at work |
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Undercover Amish Mafia Member
Posts: 9991
Location: Kansas | errrrmagod!!!!! WTF man! |
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 The One
Posts: 7997
Location: South Georgia | Gross. Disgusting. Deal breaker, for sure. |
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Hawty & Nawty
Posts: 20424
| In my best Bronx accent.
"Hey! if you want something to chew. I got something for you to chew."
Okay, so not classy. LOL *shrugs* |
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Serious Snap Trapper
Posts: 4275
Location: In The Snow, AZ | I don't know whether to laugh, cry or go look up how awesome red heads are. Geez louise. I've been blonde, red, black, brown and everything in between. But sounds like red heads are freaking awesome....or lunatics.....I'm gonna go brush my ponies, then hubby and I will probably take the CanAm out for a forest cruise and drink a couple beers. Dang....back to my crappy life. |
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Location: Kentucky | Let it go... Let it go.... This was a great way to pass time at work and get a 2 o'clock laugh in and wake up the office.     |
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Chicken Chick
Posts: 3562
Location: Texas | Luvmyebstang - 2015-01-06 12:57 PM Lol! Yes being a redhead does tell your personality! We are very firey, strong willed, very opinionated, spontaneous etc! We are not like blondes or brunettes. We are a different breed and it has everything to do with that redheaded personality! Only a redhead would understand, others are clueless. Look up redhead personalities and traits!
I have a very large family. Most of the women on my mom's side are natural red heads, including my mom. It is not the red heads that are "firey and opinionated", all the head B's in our family have dark brown or black hair. I also don't think it is because of their hair color, it just happens that they were born with those personalities and that hair color. Hair color has nothing to do with personality. One aunt has hair the color of yours, and she is the sweetest most giving person you would ever meet... not strong willed and people run over her often. She has her opinions like everyone else but she doesn't try to talk/act a certain way because she is a red head.
I think you are using your hair color as an excuse to talk/act how ever you want. Honey, it isn't working. |
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Undercover Amish Mafia Member
Posts: 9991
Location: Kansas |  |
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Member
Posts: 39
Location: Texarkana | I take back what I said. Knowing now you are a red head.. your absolutely right.. I say the young kid is a d-bag.. your right.. just keep on as you are, I'm sure you will eventually find someone.. |
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 396
Location: Oregon | Sorry I don't use crappy box color like Clairol! I'm a REAL Hair Stylist that fixes crap like that when people are too cheap or think they know what they're doing ;) By the way I'm a natural born redhead.
If you need your hair colored correctly give me a call...I own a salon ;)
Oh I let it go long ago! It's funny seeing you guys get worked up about nothing. Its all good fun! Let's just relax and move on ;)
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Member
Posts: 39
Location: Texarkana | Have you been to a gym lately? I hear there's lots of hot guys there |
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Fact Checker
Posts: 16572
Location: Displaced Iowegian | notwhouthink - 2015-01-06 3:16 PM Have you been to a gym lately? I hear there's lots of hot guys there
I think she's been there....done that.......... |
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Undercover Amish Mafia Member
Posts: 9991
Location: Kansas | Luvmyebstang - 2015-01-06 3:08 PM Sorry I don't use crappy box color like Clairol! I'm a REAL Hair Stylist that fixes crap like that when people are too cheap or think they know what they're doing ; ) By the way I'm a natural born redhead. If you need your hair colored correctly give me a call...I own a salon ; ) Oh I let it go long ago! It's funny seeing you guys get worked up about nothing. Its all good fun! Let's just relax and move on ; )
oooo you own a salon???
well I own a cat! |
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Chatty Kathy
Posts: 6634
Location: In Ky following Barrel Races & Walker hounds. | hoofs_in_motion - 2015-01-06 3:21 PM
Luvmyebstang - 2015-01-06 3:08 PM Sorry I don't use crappy box color like Clairol! I'm a REAL Hair Stylist that fixes crap like that when people are too cheap or think they know what they're doing ; ) By the way I'm a natural born redhead. If you need your hair colored correctly give me a call...I own a salon ; ) Oh I let it go long ago! It's funny seeing you guys get worked up about nothing. Its all good fun! Let's just relax and move on ; )
well I own a cat!
I own a dog. |
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 357
Location: Canada | Anyone else seen the "Hot/Crazy Matrix" video on youtube? She's a redhead and a hair stylist.....makes sense! 
Edited by Whit37 2015-01-06 3:28 PM
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 396
Location: Oregon | Lmao!
Too fun! |
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Hawty & Nawty
Posts: 20424
| My husband owns everything. |
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Elite Veteran
Posts: 1182
Location: Do I hear Banjos? |
Hey I just figured out you can "Like" your own posts. Who knew? 
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Shipwrecked and Flat Out Zapped
Posts: 16390
Location: DUMPING CATS AND PIGS IN TEXAS :) | TrailGirl - 2015-01-06 4:30 PM Hey I just figured out you can "Like" your own posts. Who knew?
There's one person you can always count on to like your post....you  |
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Shipwrecked and Flat Out Zapped
Posts: 16390
Location: DUMPING CATS AND PIGS IN TEXAS :) | I always have a least one like, because I like everything I say lol. |
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Chicken Chick
Posts: 3562
Location: Texas | LRQHS - 2015-01-06 4:36 PM I always have a least one like, because I like everything I say lol.
I don't... sometimes I immediately regret it. "Delete" is my favorite and most used button lol. |
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Shipwrecked and Flat Out Zapped
Posts: 16390
Location: DUMPING CATS AND PIGS IN TEXAS :) | pinx05 - 2015-01-06 4:48 PM LRQHS - 2015-01-06 4:36 PM I always have a least one like, because I like everything I say lol. I don't... sometimes I immediately regret it. "Delete" is my favorite and most used button lol.
I'ma give me a like for posting that I gave you a like too.
Edited by LRQHS 2015-01-06 4:52 PM
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Chicken Chick
Posts: 3562
Location: Texas | LRQHS - 2015-01-06 4:50 PM pinx05 - 2015-01-06 4:48 PM LRQHS - 2015-01-06 4:36 PM I always have a least one like, because I like everything I say lol. I don't... sometimes I immediately regret it. "Delete" is my favorite and most used button lol.
I'ma give me a like for posting that I gave you a like too.
Whoop! Gone and got myself a lizike! |
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Member
Posts: 39
Location: Texarkana | wish I could have been born a red head.. then I could use that excuse too |
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Toastest with the Mostest
Posts: 5712
Location: That part of Texas | notwhouthink - 2015-01-06 5:15 PM wish I could have been born a red head.. then I could use that excuse too
Meh, I wouldn't worry too much. You'll get more mileage out of blaming your horoscope sign for craziness, moodiness or whatever than your hair color. |
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Member
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Location: Texarkana | Red Raider - 2015-01-06 6:55 PM
notwhouthink - 2015-01-06 5:15 PM wish I could have been born a red head.. then I could use that excuse too
Meh, I wouldn't worry too much. You'll get more mileage out of blaming your horoscope sign for craziness, moodiness or whatever than your hair color.
True true. I wonder how that goes in court? Can I get off since I'm a red head? You know, since I don't think I should be held accountable for my actions. I'm not stalking the young whipper snapper. I want my 20 bucks back that I spent getting our invitations sent out. Isn't there a male on here that has had stalker issues? I wonder what color his hair is.
Edited by notwhouthink 2015-01-06 8:15 PM
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 396
Location: Oregon | You're an idiot ^ lol
Since when is one phone call a stalker lol
Get over it hunny! |
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Member
Posts: 39
Location: Texarkana | You really show signs of maturity by your postings. Im proud of you! Keeping it classy |
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Member
Posts: 39
Location: Texarkana | Luvmyebstang - 2015-01-05 6:57 PM I have moved on! I have learned from him. Don't pay for a date if a dumbass can't lol. He's an idiot ass. On a another side not....what do you all think about a guy a few years younger interested in you?? Anyone have a bf or husband few years younger? I've always gone older because of maturity and time in life we are at in 20's. Last a hole was 22 and I tried younger and that went bad...
older ones see you as eye candy maybe? And the younger ones see you as someone who will pay so they dont have to..
Serioulsy, look at it from an outsiders prospective. Go back and read your posts as if you are reading what someone else wrote. You will see what we are saying, and how you are portraying yourself as clingy and very insecure. No matter what you say you are or are not, we can only go by what we see you saying on here. You are giving off the signal that you are all of what I mentioned above.
I understand the want and desire to find a partner, however, from things you are posting on here, if the guys you are chasing are seeing even a hint of emotional insecurities, and obsessivness, they will run the other way quick. Lighten up and dont be looking so hard. It will come. Just enjoy your youth without worrying about guys. Eventually the right one will come along, and it will just click and work... |
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 Expert
Posts: 1718
Location: Southeast Louisiana | Maybe the $20 thing was him testing you? The only thing that would bother me is that he said he was going to do something (give you the twenty bucks back) and then didn't follow through. But, he may have been looking for you to tell him not to worry about it. I know guys who think some girls are users when they just want a guy to spend money on them all of the time (not saying that's the case with you, just what I've heard guys say). Either way, just forget the twenty bucks and move on.
I don't like chewing or smoking, but I agree that one bad habit is not a reason for me to dislike someone. |
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Fact Checker
Posts: 16572
Location: Displaced Iowegian | Luvmyebstang - 2015-01-06 10:25 PM You're an idiot ^ lol Since when is one phone call a stalker lol Get over it hunny!
I just hate it when people can't keep their stories straight......
texts DO count as "calls"........As in your words....Get over it hunny! YOUR words..........
Well I met a guy and we have been talking for couple weeks and going to meet soon |
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Elite Veteran
Posts: 667
| Threads like this are why I like to come on BHW...Entertainment!!! They make my day go by faster.. |
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Serious Snap Trapper
Posts: 4275
Location: In The Snow, AZ | TNcowgirl88 - 2015-01-07 7:43 AM Threads like this are why I like to come on BHW...Entertainment!!! They make my day go by faster..
It is cause you have a crappy life too?
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Shipwrecked and Flat Out Zapped
Posts: 16390
Location: DUMPING CATS AND PIGS IN TEXAS :) | ~BINGO~ - 2015-01-07 9:45 AM TNcowgirl88 - 2015-01-07 7:43 AM Threads like this are why I like to come on BHW...Entertainment!!! They make my day go by faster..
You have a crappy life and come here for rude beat downs just like the rest of us. Admit it. |
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Elite Veteran
Posts: 667
| LRQHS - 2015-01-07 9:48 AM
~BINGO~ - 2015-01-07 9:45 AM TNcowgirl88 - 2015-01-07 7:43 AM Threads like this are why I like to come on BHW...Entertainment!!! They make my day go by faster..
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Hawty & Nawty
Posts: 20424
| Man, everything you say can and will be held against you in the court of BHW. I'm sorry OP, you kind of asked for it, but I bet you didn't expect AAALLL THISSS....LOL
Can we get back to the man chewing issue? Did you all get my Barbie Kotex joke? I must be losing my touch.
And...I'm liking this post so I can walk away with some pride. |
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 Do You Feel Lucky Punk?
Posts: 3156
Location: NM...the Land of Manana | RidenFly - 2015-01-07 8:52 AM Man, everything you say can and will be held against you in the court of BHW. I'm sorry OP, you kind of asked for it, but I bet you didn't expect AAALLL THISSS....LOL
Can we get back to the man chewing issue? Did you all get my Barbie Kotex joke? I must be losing my touch.
And...I'm liking this post so I can walk away with some pride.
I just now slogged through this thread and I totally get the joke. My dad chewed those when he quit smoking. At least with those it doesn't get all stuck between their teeth and such, eww! |
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Elite Veteran
Posts: 1182
Location: Do I hear Banjos? | Ok...I''l admit to not getting the Barbie Kotex thing at all....maybe I'm sloooow? It could be the auburn hair....it has blond streaks (natural ones)
And I'm a natural Auburn...the miss clairol was a joke for the OP...I'm too cheap/lazy to color my hair until I go gray. |
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Hawty & Nawty
Posts: 20424
| Lightfoot - 2015-01-08 7:55 AM RidenFly - 2015-01-07 8:52 AM Man, everything you say can and will be held against you in the court of BHW. I'm sorry OP, you kind of asked for it, but I bet you didn't expect AAALLL THISSS....LOL
Can we get back to the man chewing issue? Did you all get my Barbie Kotex joke? I must be losing my touch.
And...I'm liking this post so I can walk away with some pride. I just now slogged through this thread and I totally get the joke. My dad chewed those when he quit smoking. At least with those it doesn't get all stuck between their teeth and such, eww!
My husband chews those. When I told him what it reminded me of, he shot me the dirtiest look you can imagine.
"Going into the store for your can of kotex, honey?" |
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Hawty & Nawty
Posts: 20424
| TrailGirl - 2015-01-08 7:56 AM Ok...I''l admit to not getting the Barbie Kotex thing at all....maybe I'm sloooow? It could be the auburn hair....it has blond streaks (natural ones)
And I'm a natural Auburn...the miss clairol was a joke for the OP...I'm too cheap/lazy to color my hair until I go gray.
Yeah, we all knew you're kinda special. It's the tobacco in the little white square pouches. |
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Ima Fickle Fan
Posts: 3547
Location: Texas | TrailGirl - 2015-01-07 9:56 AM Ok...I''l admit to not getting the Barbie Kotex thing at all....maybe I'm sloooow? It could be the auburn hair....it has blond streaks (natural ones)
And I'm a natural Auburn...the miss clairol was a joke for the OP...I'm too cheap/lazy to color my hair until I go gray.
I didn't get it either. Of course, I am a brunette but come from a VERY long line of blondes. I'm also boring that way I guess since my hair is brown. I do have a blonde spot from birth. Unfortunately, I cover it and my few gray hairs every six weeks. On the bright side, my color is not Clairol and I do go to a salon.
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Elite Veteran
Posts: 1182
Location: Do I hear Banjos? | RidenFly - 2015-01-07 9:58 AM TrailGirl - 2015-01-08 7:56 AM Ok...I''l admit to not getting the Barbie Kotex thing at all....maybe I'm sloooow? It could be the auburn hair....it has blond streaks (natural ones)
And I'm a natural Auburn...the miss clairol was a joke for the OP...I'm too cheap/lazy to color my hair until I go gray.
Ahhh...gotcha!
I'm not very savvy on the various forms of tobacco. I AM however a plum wine expert if anyone needs tips there. That is my vice. Well...that and candy corn...and funnel cake... |
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Chicken Chick
Posts: 3562
Location: Texas | RidenFly - 2015-01-07 9:58 AM TrailGirl - 2015-01-08 7:56 AM Ok...I''l admit to not getting the Barbie Kotex thing at all....maybe I'm sloooow? It could be the auburn hair....it has blond streaks (natural ones)
And I'm a natural Auburn...the miss clairol was a joke for the OP...I'm too cheap/lazy to color my hair until I go gray.
I got the joke! For those that need visuals lol.
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Hawty & Nawty
Posts: 20424
| pinx05 - 2015-01-08 10:44 AM RidenFly - 2015-01-07 9:58 AM TrailGirl - 2015-01-08 7:56 AM Ok...I''l admit to not getting the Barbie Kotex thing at all....maybe I'm sloooow? It could be the auburn hair....it has blond streaks (natural ones)
And I'm a natural Auburn...the miss clairol was a joke for the OP...I'm too cheap/lazy to color my hair until I go gray.
Those are women's hands removing those out of the can. I know women chew, but I get a little squeemish thinking about it. |
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The Advice Guru
Posts: 6419
| This is to the op
I came back and read this entire 9 pages and I would love you to show your grandmother this.
You are using excuses saying you are a red head, if your natural hair color is of you in a picture to me that is not red. I have cousins that are carrot top red and they handle themselves with class, integrity, and pride. Yes their attitudes can be firy hot, but they know how to act responsibility.
You have no class, as you have attacked everyone on BHW saying we have less superior lives then you (you used deroggitory words) and we are trying to "beat you down" which is not the case.
You say you are not immature but you have used your hair color as an excuse, BHW didn't you did. Just because you own a business doesn't make you mature, as I said I know carrot top redheads that act mature. Mature people don't make excuses, they don't blame the other person, thy do not belittle other people. When things go south they pull up their socks and reflect back then respond.
For you saying you should have never paid for the thing YOU SO WANTED TO GO, I ask why shouldn't you have paid?
You wanted to go! I believe in equality, so why shouldn't the girlfriend pay?
Also after things went south, why resort to name calling? Mature people don't name call!
From all this you say you have been unlucky picking men, but you haven't learned anything. I remember reading a guys top 14 people on who not to date, hairdresser is in the top 5, as they say crazy. You need to break the mould, not be a statistic.
Age is just a number, you need to look past that. I have met very mature 18 yr old men and very immature 40 yr old men.
You saying you know you are ready to settle down and start a family. People your age who are doing this majority have been with their SO since high school. You are putting too much stress on yourself and if you jump into it, you will become a divorce statistic.
Dating has changed, if you really know what you want in a man, as others have said try eharmony, match.com, one where you actually have to pay to put your profile out. Be honest, be ready for rejection as not all the men who you will be interested in will be interested in you.
Take is slow, I read a research statistic that stated people don't start showing their true self till after 6 months.
Also learn about yourself, and quit jumping into relationship after relationship, as you are just rebounding from one to another.
You say you are independent, prove it, stay single for 6 months, pick up a different hobby, learn something.
If you want to message me you can to bounce ideas off, or for an unbiased opinion. I am not beating you down, I took the time to write this, as I do wish you success.
Take this time to grow and become a better human being. |
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Shipwrecked and Flat Out Zapped
Posts: 16390
Location: DUMPING CATS AND PIGS IN TEXAS :) | As Forrest Gump would say, "and, that's all I've got to say about that." |
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Undercover Amish Mafia Member
Posts: 9991
Location: Kansas |  |
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 Expert
Posts: 1440
Location: Texas | All I have to say is WOW this thread went way Bad! |
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 396
Location: Oregon | Enough of the mean comments please. It was funny in the beginning but many of you are quick to judge and have gone too far. Making jokes and such is disrespectful and just plain cruel. I'm also a human being and not perfect and none of you are either. I've realized a lot of people on BHW are super judgemental fast and that's pretty sad. All I was asking for was positive advice and not a cruel beat down and made fun of. Some of you should be ashamed for such comments and for attacking me as a person. Exactly it has gone too far and now is the time to stop. I had a few BHW people contact me about how disappointed they were in some of you and have lost respect. I've been thru a lot the past few months (not with guys) and all I wanted was positive advice like as if I asked my girlfriends. Thank you to people who offered positive advice. Enough is enough
Edited by Luvmyebstang 2015-01-08 4:07 AM
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Elite Veteran
Posts: 1182
Location: Do I hear Banjos? | You have called people names and been disrespectful yourself. Not just to the people here...but much more so the guy that had the temerity to let you pay for an outing you wanted badly to go on. I don't see that you apologize or own any of that.
That's pretty telling. Maturity brings the ability to own our mistakes. |
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Hungarian Midget Woman
Location: Midwest | Some people here took the time to give the op some heartfelt advice.... Good grief. |
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Undercover Amish Mafia Member
Posts: 9991
Location: Kansas | It never would have gotten this far.....if you hadn't of changed stories. There are good fish, and bad fish in the "sea" I guess you could say. We understand the guy wasn't exactly the right man for you, but the way you handled the situtation is kind of how this began. There was no need to call any of the BB's names.
Let me tell you this, I'm assuming your the same age as I am (23), or a few years older. Instead of trying to find a man, just because you want to be dating....you need to focus on what you can do with life...or what life can do for you. Just because you don't have a boyfriend/husband doesn't mean your a failure at dating....it just means the right one has yet to come along. |
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Hawty & Nawty
Posts: 20424
| No matter what, despite all the jokes, I for one, hope you don't take the teasing to heart. This too shall pass. Smile and move on with your day. |
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Serious Snap Trapper
Posts: 4275
Location: In The Snow, AZ | Ay yai yai. I didn't really read anything necessarily mean or cruel. More comical if anything. I pretty well enjoy my crappy life. And I found this more amusing than finding BB's "disappointing". But then again, the fun wasn't poked at me. However, I doubt I would keep coming back to fuel the fire with more silliness.
Ok, ok. Back to topic (even tho he's looong gone by now) if his chewing bothered you enough to have to come online and post about it, it's probably not worth pursueing. Carry on. |
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Shipwrecked and Flat Out Zapped
Posts: 16390
Location: DUMPING CATS AND PIGS IN TEXAS :) | You can look at things positively or negatively, the choice is yours. The tough love came from those of us that have read all of your posts about your guy problems in the past and, I spoke to you like I would speak to my sister or my friend. At first you were given encouragement, advise, "he's a jerk," "you're better than that" advise on the previous posts......and, maybe some were jerks, maybe they all were.....we don't know their sides of the story, but now, based on the words you typed, I gave you my advise and called it as I see it. And, yes, it did get comical, because it really is in my eyes. I own everything I said. You ask for advise and you get it from different people, from all over.. even Canada. We interpret your words and give you our opinions and advise.....because you posted asking for it. You didn't like some of it. You used excuses. You name called. You say that people pm'd you about losing respect for some of us.....I would respect someone that made an attempt to help me, even if it wasn't the attempt that I wanted. I would respect someone that told me the truth as they saw it and not sugar coat it and blow butterflies at me. Perhaps you should just PM them next time so they can tell you what you want to hear, because we seem to be incapable of doing that adequately. Learn to laugh at yourself.
Edited by LRQHS 2015-01-08 10:25 AM
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Fact Checker
Posts: 16572
Location: Displaced Iowegian | LRQHS - 2015-01-08 10:23 AM You can look at things positively or negatively, the choice is yours. The tough love came from those of us that have read all of your posts about your guy problems in the past and, I spoke to you like I would speak to my sister or my friend. At first you were given encouragement, advise, "he's a jerk," "you're better than that" advise on the previous posts......and, maybe some were jerks, maybe they all were.....we don't know their sides of the story, but now, based on the words you typed, I gave you my advise and called it as I see it. And, yes, it did get comical, because it really is in my eyes. I own everything I said. You ask for advise and you get it from different people, from all over.. even Canada. We interpret your words and give you our opinions and advise.....because you posted asking for it. You didn't like some of it. You used excuses. You name called. You say that people pm'd you about losing respect for some of us.....I would respect someone that made an attempt to help me, even if it wasn't the attempt that I wanted. I would respect someone that told me the truth as they saw it and not sugar coat it and blow butterflies at me. Perhaps you should just PM them next time so they can tell you what you want to hear, because we seem to be incapable of doing that adequately. Learn to laugh at yourself.
^^^^ THIS.......You, actually, could have let this thread die....but YOU came back to stir it up again......relax, breathe.....and have a good day! |
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 Bit O Holic
Posts: 6448
Location: hot, humid and dry...Gulf coast East of Houston.. | Y'all are just so dang mean!! I hope you all feel good about yourselves for giving your opinions that differ from others, and saying how things appear to you by reading whats being said. Oh the horror!!
BTW... No way am I reading this whole thread, so at this point, I dont even have a clue what it may have turned into with 10 pages.. LOL
Edited by shellyh1971 2015-01-08 11:18 AM
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Shipwrecked and Flat Out Zapped
Posts: 16390
Location: DUMPING CATS AND PIGS IN TEXAS :) | shellyh1971 - 2015-01-08 11:17 AM Y'all are just so dang mean!! I hope you all feel good about yourselves for giving your opinions that differ from others, and saying how things appear to you by reading whats being said. Oh the horror!!
BTW... No way am I reading this whole thread, so at this point, I dont even have a clue what it may have turned into with 10 pages.. LOL
Suit yourself lol. There was some good stuff in there. |
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Bit O Holic
Posts: 6448
Location: hot, humid and dry...Gulf coast East of Houston.. | LRQHS - 2015-01-08 11:22 AM shellyh1971 - 2015-01-08 11:17 AM Y'all are just so dang mean!! I hope you all feel good about yourselves for giving your opinions that differ from others, and saying how things appear to you by reading whats being said. Oh the horror!!
BTW... No way am I reading this whole thread, so at this point, I dont even have a clue what it may have turned into with 10 pages.. LOL
Suit yourself lol. There was some good stuff in there.
Im sure there was.. I mean with 10 pages. I know its not only about chew by now... No way.. I know this site.. |
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Fact Checker
Posts: 16572
Location: Displaced Iowegian | shellyh1971 - 2015-01-08 11:25 AM LRQHS - 2015-01-08 11:22 AM shellyh1971 - 2015-01-08 11:17 AM Y'all are just so dang mean!! I hope you all feel good about yourselves for giving your opinions that differ from others, and saying how things appear to you by reading whats being said. Oh the horror!!
BTW... No way am I reading this whole thread, so at this point, I dont even have a clue what it may have turned into with 10 pages.. LOL
Suit yourself lol. There was some good stuff in there.
A little lazy this morning, Shelly? Get to reading......you need the education! |
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Bit O Holic
Posts: 6448
Location: hot, humid and dry...Gulf coast East of Houston.. | NJJ - 2015-01-08 11:34 AM shellyh1971 - 2015-01-08 11:25 AM LRQHS - 2015-01-08 11:22 AM shellyh1971 - 2015-01-08 11:17 AM Y'all are just so dang mean!! I hope you all feel good about yourselves for giving your opinions that differ from others, and saying how things appear to you by reading whats being said. Oh the horror!!
BTW... No way am I reading this whole thread, so at this point, I dont even have a clue what it may have turned into with 10 pages.. LOL
Suit yourself lol. There was some good stuff in there.
yea, I guess.. LOL Maybe I will catch up later |
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 396
Location: Oregon | When you start attacking a person yes I am going to defend myself! I'm
Not going to sit here and have rude people that assume and don't know me personally attack me like they think they can. Karma is a ***** and shame on some of you, you know who you are. I'm not going to respond to anymore disrespectful comments so let it go. Be careful what you say to some people...
Edited by Luvmyebstang 2015-01-08 7:50 PM
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Location: Great Places Great Faces | Luvmyebstang - 2015-01-08 6:46 PM When you start attacking a person yes I am going to defend myself! I'm Not going to sit here and have rude people that assume and don't know me personally attack me like they think they can. Karma is a ***** and shame on some of you, you know who you are. I'm not going to respond to anymore disrespectful comments so let it go. Be careful what you say to some people...
D-R-A-M-A^^^^^
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Hawty & Nawty
Posts: 20424
| Luvmyebstang - 2015-01-09 5:46 PM When you start attacking a person yes I am going to defend myself! I'm Not going to sit here and have rude people that assume and don't know me personally attack me like they think they can. Karma is a ***** and shame on some of you, you know who you are. I'm not going to respond to anymore disrespectful comments so let it go. Be careful what you say to some people...
Ask anyone--even the peeps that don't really care for me, I'll defend something to the grave if I think it's just. But girl, you are the one who called somebody an Idiot. You don't really have to point something like that out, if they are an Idiot, the rest of the world would know it. By coming back here and going off again and again, you're just either, A; very young or B; enjoying any kind of attention--even bad.
Secondly, you can start a thread but you don't OWN the thread. It can go in several directions and not in anyway reflect the OP.
Good grief. I'm done. Have a good day and go smoke on a toke or something. |
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 Expert
Posts: 1857
| Luvmyebstang - 2015-01-08 7:46 PM
When you start attacking a person yes I am going to defend myself! I'm
Not going to sit here and have rude people that assume and don't know me personally attack me like they think they can. Karma is a ***** and shame on some of you, you know who you are. I'm not going to respond to anymore disrespectful comments so let it go. Be careful what you say to some people...
I stood up for you because some things were taken to far and I still feel like they are wrong for doing it but I cannot continue to feel sorry for the way you have been treated when you continue to get on here and antagonize the situation. Sometimes our need to be right can result in defensiveness permeating our lives, resulting in our relationships(not only love but friendships too) to be affected. I'm not sitting here telling you that you have no right to be upset by some of the comments, you do/did but remember that it's not what is being said or done to you that matters but how you choose to react. Maturity is humility.
Focus on you for awhile and I'm sure the right man will show up when you least expect it!
Ps: I'm on my phone so please excuse any errors, these things do what they want! |
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Fact Checker
Posts: 16572
Location: Displaced Iowegian | Luvmyebstang - 2015-01-08 7:46 PM When you start attacking a person yes I am going to defend myself! I'm Not going to sit here and have rude people that assume and don't know me personally attack me like they think they can. Karma is a ***** and shame on some of you, you know who you are. I'm not going to respond to anymore disrespectful comments so let it go. Be careful what you say to some people...
All I have to say is the horse is DEAD!
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 Voice of Reason
Location: NOT at Wal Mart | Holy cow, must be the weather........ |
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Elite Veteran
Posts: 667
| Luvmyebstang - 2015-01-08 7:46 PM
When you start attacking a person yes I am going to defend myself! I'm
Not going to sit here and have rude people that assume and don't know me personally attack me like they think they can. Karma is a ***** and shame on some of you, you know who you are. I'm not going to respond to anymore disrespectful comments so let it go. Be careful what you say to some people...
Do you ever just give up??????
If not, now would be the time. |
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