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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 512
| I am really needing some thoughts, advice and counsel on a situation my family is facing.
My husband has been working a job for almost two years for a very successful privately owned company. When he was hired, the sole owner of the company's oldest son was working the job my husband took. The owner created another job that put his son out on the road doing more sales. My husband managed some internal sales and the finances of the company. My husband graduated with a degree in finance/business and is very qualified for this job. Over the last year and so many months he has had 2 job reviews which the sole owner of the company gave him fantastic reviews. He told him he was doing a really good job and thinks he will continue to learn the trade of the business they are in. The things he critiqued him on were to just keep learning about the business and striving to make more sales. Also, my husband was a few mins late to work here and there as we were in the process of buying a house (5-10 mins). Nothing else was ever said from the owner of the company to my knowledge (my husband is a pretty transparent man so I don't feel he is hiding anything). A couple side notes: We had become good friends and adored the family of the owners (fellow Christians) and really looked up to them. My husband also works part time for a church on the side and he loves ministry.
Fast forward to this past Friday. Our family was faced with a very hard week (I had surgery to remove a tumor on my uterus, and we had family in town to help us, my husband also is writing a sermon for church this coming week-all things the owner of the company should have known). He calls my husband into his office and tells him that today (friday) would be his last day working in the office and that he was moving him out to the sawmill for a few months until my husband finds a new job (keeping his pay the same for a few months and how fortunate my husband should feel to make double what the other sawmill workers are making). The reason he is firing him is the owner just felt God told him the job wasn't for my husband anymore. The owner also said that he was putting his son back in the office and getting rid of the job he had created for him. When my husband shockingly asked for specific critique and reasoning the owner basically said he thought my husband had more passion for ministry and the owner was doing him a favor.
Now.. I agree my husband loves ministry and ideally would love to be doing it full time. Bur right now, financially our family couldn't afford it. My husband put extra hours into his job, staying late on many occasions. He also asked numerous times for the other men in the office to help him learn the trade of the business-which none of them ever followed through with. My husband was never given warning or a negative review and a chance to improve on whatever the owner wasn't pleased with (which seems like nothing!). My husband told the owner he thought the way he was going about this was wrong and ungodly, but the owner just basically said he could make any decision he wanted and doesn't answer to anyone but himself. He told my husband he had been praying about this decision for 3 months and just work up Friday and felt like Friday was the day.
I am beyond hurt, angry, and disappointed in the actions of this so-called Christian man. We have a family, and obligations, and I wonder if he is moving him to the sawmill and allowing him a few months to find a new job to avoid unemployment? Does anyone know the ruling on this?
It is a smaller company-maybe 75 total employees. 5 in office and the rest in a sawmill.
God always has a plan, but I am so angry a these people and honestly feel it has destroyed our friendship. I can't help but think his son just wanted his old job back and now we are left out to dry! Any advice appreciated. What do we do from here?
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  Fact Checker
Posts: 16575
  
Location: Displaced Iowegian | Not knowing where you live (state), it is very hard to give you advice. That being said, go online and check your state's labor laws. Most states are "at will" and the employer can lay off, fire, transfer, etc. at any time for any reason. However, when he lets him go from the sawmill, he MAY be able to draw unemployment. I think the boss is hoping by moving him to the sawmill, he will quit....THAT would null and void unemployment compensation....
eta: The boss covered his bases pretty well. If he had transferred him and gave him a substantial cut in pay, more than likely, your husband could have quit and drawn compensation. Christianity has nothing to do with any "business" decisions....IF he lied about his reasoning, that would be "un-Christian" like.
Edited by NJJ 2015-08-16 3:41 PM
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 Chasin my Dream
Posts: 13651
 
Location: Alberta | I agree with NJJ... Id focus on moving forward and not worrying how as friends they could do this..... Trust me I know it sucks when hubby gets let go, it's like the rug has been pulled out from under you. Focus on the good that he's still going to get a paycheck for a time till he finds another job AND/OR if you can get unemployment that's helpful. Unfortunately when working for other people nothing is guaranteed, even if your a hard worker etc Wishing you the best moving forward!
Edited by dream_chaser 2015-08-16 10:37 AM
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 512
| Thank you all for the encouragement and you are right! There is always good in situations! |
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 Proud to be Deplorable
Posts: 1929
| The owner says "God told him" Ya right!!! To me what is really going on is the owner's son doesn't like the new job that Dad gave him and wants his old job back. In small business family always wins. |
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 512
| jbhoot - 2015-08-16 9:45 AM
The owner says "God told him" Ya right!!! To me what is really going on is the owner's son doesn't like the new job that Dad gave him and wants his old job back. In small business family always wins.
100% agree with you! We feel this is the reasoning too. |
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 Accident Prone
Posts: 22277
Location: 100 miles from Nowhere, AR | The owner probably thought he was being kind to give the reason he did. It's not easy for most of us to fire people, even when they deserve it. 100 times harder when they haven't done anything wrong. His business and his family are going to come before a friendship, and IMO, that's as it should be. I understand the hurt and bewilderment on your part--who wouldn't feel that way--but when one door closes, another opens. Have Faith that this will work out for the best. |
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Addicted to Baseball
Location: Where the stars at night are big and bright, TX | Three 4 Luck - 2015-08-16 12:30 PM The owner probably thought he was being kind to give the reason he did. It's not easy for most of us to fire people, even when they deserve it. 100 times harder when they haven't done anything wrong. His business and his family are going to come before a friendship, and IMO, that's as it should be. I understand the hurt and bewilderment on your part--who wouldn't feel that way--but when one door closes, another opens. Have Faith that this will work out for the best.
This is good advice, though I don't agree with "as it should be" more like "it is what it is" even if the family is not qualified or the best person for the job family makes those kinds of decisions even if it's not the best for them or others.
Prayers you all find something quickly and can put this behind you. We've been in the same situation, it sucks and it hurts. We don't always know the answers this side of eternity but I hope it's putting you on a path to something better. |
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 512
| Three 4 Luck - 2015-08-16 12:30 PM
The owner probably thought he was being kind to give the reason he did. It's not easy for most of us to fire people, even when they deserve it. 100 times harder when they haven't done anything wrong. His business and his family are going to come before a friendship, and IMO, that's as it should be. I understand the hurt and bewilderment on your part--who wouldn't feel that way--but when one door closes, another opens. Have Faith that this will work out for the best.
This is good advice. My only thing is the people that work for these companies have families to feed and care for also. I am not as upset about the door closing as I am in the lack of tact he had while demoting him with no warning. And the fact he hid his excuses behind his Christianity. |
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 Extreme Veteran
Posts: 590
Location: Austin, Texas, where it can get really weird!! | I would think that if he said he cared more about his church than his job, and attendance was not an issue, i would be calling a lawyer for religious discrimination. |
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Accident Prone
Posts: 22277
Location: 100 miles from Nowhere, AR | kewlcowgurl - 2015-08-16 3:10 PM I would think that if he said he cared more about his church than his job, and attendance was not an issue, i would be calling a lawyer for religious discrimination.
Say what? |
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| Be grateful hubby will be working a few months at the sawmill at same pay ... usually no warning is given ..
Keep in mind that it is easier to find a job while still employed rather than unemployed!!
Keep your friendship with this owner and family ... he could have just handed him his paycheck and opened the door. Hubby should thank him and tell him I appreciate his kindness and advice on keeping my business life and religion separated in the future!! .. This is to subtly encourage owner to give him good reviews should a future HR staff inquire about your work record.
You have learned a tuff lesson ... don't try to be a part of the owners family by getting too friendly with him//family or any of the other employees at his next job. Keep majority of your family happenings private and the same way with keeping your religion separated while on the job .. make your insider friends some where else rather than work.
I can say for myself ... my best friends live 50-200 miles from me and we are always glad to see each other and enjoy our time together. .. I consider my neighbors as being too needy and nosy ... lol ... funny how this works well for a lot of people ..
No dissing anyone or the company on interviews. Just say the company eliminated their outside salesman back to his previous office job and since he had more seniority ... I am now looking to become a member of your company....
GOOD LUCK!!
Edited by BARRELHORSE USA 2015-08-16 7:19 PM
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 512
| BARRELHORSE USA - 2015-08-16 7:14 PM
Be grateful hubby will be working a few months at the sawmill at same pay ... usually no warning is given ..
Keep in mind that it is easier to find a job while still employed rather than unemployed!!
Keep your friendship with this owner and family ... he could have just handed him his paycheck and opened the door.
You have learned a tuff lesson ... don't try to be a part of the owners family by getting too friendly with him//family or any of the other employees at his next job. Keep majority of your family happenings private and the same way with keeping your religion separated while on the job .. make your insider friends some where else rather than work.
I can say for myself ... my best friends live 50-200 miles from me and we are always glad to see each other and enjoy our time together. .. I consider my neighbors as being too needy and nosy ... lol ... funny how this works well for a lot of people ..
No dissing anyone or the company on interviews. Just say the company eliminated their outside salesman back to his previous office job and since he had more seniority ... I am now looking to become a member of your company....
GOOD LUCK!!
Thank you and yes lesson learned! And we are very grateful for the pay just like someone else said you feel the rug pulled out! But it will all work out. And definitely no dissing!
Edited by Blueridgedreaming 2015-08-16 7:21 PM
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| I added a couple things by editing previous post ...>>>>
Be grateful hubby will be working a few months at the sawmill at same pay ... usually no warning is given ..
Keep in mind that it is easier to find a job while still employed rather than unemployed!!
Keep your friendship with this owner and family ... he could have just handed him his paycheck and opened the door. Hubby should thank him and tell him I appreciate his kindness and advice on keeping my business life and religion separated in the future!! .. This is to subtly encourage owner to give him good reviews should a future HR staff inquire about your work record.
You have learned a tuff lesson ... don't try to be a part of the owners family by getting too friendly with him//family or any of the other employees at his next job. Keep majority of your family happenings private and the same way with keeping your religion separated while on the job .. make your insider friends some where else rather than work.
I can say for myself ... my best friends live 50-200 miles from me and we are always glad to see each other and enjoy our time together. .. I consider my neighbors as being too needy and nosy ... lol ... funny how this works well for a lot of people ..
No dissing anyone or the company on interviews. Just say the company eliminated their outside salesman back to his previous office job and since he had more seniority ... I am now looking to become a member of your company....
GOOD LUCK!!
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 512
| Thank you all for reminding me to see the good in all things! I feel better after reading your encouragement! |
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 My Heart Be Happy
Posts: 9159
Location: Arkansas | Please keep us updated on what's going on----and I KNOW you'll have good news to share about what God has opened up for your husband. |
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 512
| We are both Christian families (the owners and our family).
The owner just said he is letting my husband go because he prayed about it and God told him it was the right decision. The owner told my husband he needed to be doing ministry because he saw my husbands passion for it. However the owner was extremely unkind and unloving during thur process.
My husband would love to be doing ministry and we are hoping maybe that is the door that will open for us. But we have been praying ourselves and didn't feel it was time for him to end his career in HR and my husband and I were shocked at the news of being let go.
My husband really enjoyed his job at the company but we will just pick ourselves up and look at this as a positive thing not negative! The owner didn't have any substantial reasoning for letting him besides he had been praying and God told him. Which happened to be the same week I was faced with a scary surgery, we had family in town to watch our baby? I guess I don't see it the same way but good will come from it!
We hate to make too much trouble as we live in a remote area. We have decided to just move on kindly and quietly and hope for the best! |
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 316
| Blueridgedreaming - 2015-08-17 9:17 AM
We are both Christian families (the owners and our family).
The owner just said he is letting my husband go because he prayed about it and God told him it was the right decision. The owner told my husband he needed to be doing ministry because he saw my husbands passion for it. However the owner was extremely unkind and unloving during thur process.
My husband would love to be doing ministry and we are hoping maybe that is the door that will open for us. But we have been praying ourselves and didn't feel it was time for him to end his career in HR and my husband and I were shocked at the news of being let go.
My husband really enjoyed his job at the company but we will just pick ourselves up and look at this as a positive thing not negative! The owner didn't have any substantial reasoning for letting him besides he had been praying and God told him. Which happened to be the same week I was faced with a scary surgery, we had family in town to watch our baby? I guess I don't see it the same way but good will come from it!
We hate to make too much trouble as we live in a remote area. We have decided to just move on kindly and quietly and hope for the best!
Personally, I don't see this as unkind or unloving during the process. Unkind to me would be that he fired him and told him good luck down the road but instead he gave him another job that has the same pay. That to me is extremely kind. Not many people are lucky enough to get that opportunity. And yes I'm sure it is his son wanted his old job back. Family business is exactly that Family first in the Business. They won't dump their own son (as most people won't) into a job he hates so another person can have their job.
Good luck in the future it will all work out for you guys! |
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 512
| Tatum2 - 2015-08-17 9:52 AM
Blueridgedreaming - 2015-08-17 9:17 AM
We are both Christian families (the owners and our family).
The owner just said he is letting my husband go because he prayed about it and God told him it was the right decision. The owner told my husband he needed to be doing ministry because he saw my husbands passion for it. However the owner was extremely unkind and unloving during thur process.
My husband would love to be doing ministry and we are hoping maybe that is the door that will open for us. But we have been praying ourselves and didn't feel it was time for him to end his career in HR and my husband and I were shocked at the news of being let go.
My husband really enjoyed his job at the company but we will just pick ourselves up and look at this as a positive thing not negative! The owner didn't have any substantial reasoning for letting him besides he had been praying and God told him. Which happened to be the same week I was faced with a scary surgery, we had family in town to watch our baby? I guess I don't see it the same way but good will come from it!
We hate to make too much trouble as we live in a remote area. We have decided to just move on kindly and quietly and hope for the best!
Personally, I don't see this as unkind or unloving during the process. Unkind to me would be that he fired him and told him good luck down the road but instead he gave him another job that has the same pay. That to me is extremely kind. Not many people are lucky enough to get that opportunity. And yes I'm sure it is his son wanted his old job back. Family business is exactly that Family first in the Business. They won't dump their own son (as most people won't ) into a job he hates so another person can have their job.
Good luck in the future it will all work out for you guys!
Don't get me wrong-him allowing him to work in the sawmill is very kind! But having a "I don't care attitude" about anything else in my mind is unkind! Let's just say that I would hope to have gone about it differently if I was put in his shoes. My dad is a very successful small business owner and I have never seen him uproot someone like this man did. Again we are very thankful for the continued opportunity just surprised at how he presented it. And yes he could have sent him out the door Friday but as a devoted christian man you hope he would have more tact. Which he did by allowing my husband to continue working but I would expect even more from him as a person/friend. Just a for warning or word of thankfulness towards my husbands hard work and $$$$ earned in sales.
Thanks for the good luck wishes! |
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 512
| Also to ad to the story. I gave his daughter riding lessons for 2 years before my husband starting working for him. I spent hours on the road helping her find a horse (looked at over 20 horses!) and many free hours letting her come ride my horse. Which I was happy to do! But The owner approached my husband about the job and offered it to him without us seeking it out. After my husband got the job we all got to know each other more and that is why we became family friends.
Maybe our expectations of how we think we deserved to be treated wouldn't be so high if it would have just been any other job. But as another posted said, do not mix business with pleasure and lesson learned! People will always disappoint I guess! |
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 Own It and Move On
Location: The edge of no where | Business is business. Like you said, your husband is still working to learn the ins & outs of the industry. Have you considered the fact that maybe the company isn't making enough to justify the son's position as well as your husbands? Cuts are tough and family will come first. Honestly, the business owner is being incredibly generous with his offer to give him a few months to find another job while he continues to pay him his regular salary. JMHO, but you're being awfully hard on him.
I've seen a lot of people be laid off on a Friday afternoon with no warning, it's just business. It's not personal. |
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The Advice Guru
Posts: 6419
| Blueridgedreaming - 2015-08-17 10:21 AM
Tatum2 - 2015-08-17 9:52 AM
Blueridgedreaming - 2015-08-17 9:17 AM
We are both Christian families (the owners and our family).
The owner just said he is letting my husband go because he prayed about it and God told him it was the right decision. The owner told my husband he needed to be doing ministry because he saw my husbands passion for it. However the owner was extremely unkind and unloving during thur process.
My husband would love to be doing ministry and we are hoping maybe that is the door that will open for us. But we have been praying ourselves and didn't feel it was time for him to end his career in HR and my husband and I were shocked at the news of being let go.
My husband really enjoyed his job at the company but we will just pick ourselves up and look at this as a positive thing not negative! The owner didn't have any substantial reasoning for letting him besides he had been praying and God told him. Which happened to be the same week I was faced with a scary surgery, we had family in town to watch our baby? I guess I don't see it the same way but good will come from it!
We hate to make too much trouble as we live in a remote area. We have decided to just move on kindly and quietly and hope for the best!
Personally, I don't see this as unkind or unloving during the process. Unkind to me would be that he fired him and told him good luck down the road but instead he gave him another job that has the same pay. That to me is extremely kind. Not many people are lucky enough to get that opportunity. And yes I'm sure it is his son wanted his old job back. Family business is exactly that Family first in the Business. They won't dump their own son (as most people won't ) into a job he hates so another person can have their job.
Good luck in the future it will all work out for you guys!
Don't get me wrong-him allowing him to work in the sawmill is very kind! But having a "I don't care attitude" about anything else in my mind is unkind! Let's just say that I would hope to have gone about it differently if I was put in his shoes. My dad is a very successful small business owner and I have never seen him uproot someone like this man did. Again we are very thankful for the continued opportunity just surprised at how he presented it. And yes he could have sent him out the door Friday but as a devoted christian man you hope he would have more tact. Which he did by allowing my husband to continue working but I would expect even more from him as a person/friend. Just a for warning or word of thankfulness towards my husbands hard work and $$$$ earned in sales.
Thanks for the good luck wishes!
You keep saying that the boss has not been Christian about this.
What about you?
From what you have written, I don't know how you can judge the boss.
In tough economic times businesses need to do what they must to stay afloat, it is business.
Unless you were there, you won't know exactly how it went down, your husband may not have acted entirely professional, it could have been the nonverbals the boss picked up on. |
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 512
| It is very possible that he sent non-verbals! I am sure he acted upset.
As far as acting christian.. Yes we are disappointed but haven't struck out at this man at all. I came here for advice and encouragement because I would never want people to think badly of us for talking about it here in our town. Seemed like a safer place to vent here and people have given great insight! I appreciate all the great advice. And we will try our best to move forward. I do think others would also be shocked/disheartened in a similar situation. Yes we are grateful for the paycheck. But the owner knows the sawmill can be dangerous work specially for someone with little experiences. But hard work is good for people-we are not above that by any means!
Edited by Blueridgedreaming 2015-08-17 10:41 AM
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 512
| MS2011 - 2015-08-17 10:27 AM
Business is business. Like you said, your husband is still working to learn the ins & outs of the industry. Have you considered the fact that maybe the company isn't making enough to justify the son's position as well as your husbands? Cuts are tough and family will come first. Honestly, the business owner is being incredibly generous with his offer to give him a few months to find another job while he continues to pay him his regular salary. JMHO, but you're being awfully hard on him.
I've seen a lot of people be laid off on a Friday afternoon with no warning, it's just business. It's not personal.
Yes we have thought about this and you are correct. Although the company is very financially sound and bringing in significant income per month, we also thought that the owner may not be able to justify paying two salaries if the son's job isn't working out. We understand that! |
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 Expert
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Location: Never in one place long | jbhoot - 2015-08-16 9:45 AM
The owner says "God told him" Ya right!!! To me what is really going on is the owner's son doesn't like the new job that Dad gave him and wants his old job back. In small business family always wins.
^^^ this exactly! He's using religion, playing the "God card" to get his way out of having to explain this and feeling guilty. Sounds like a very fake Christian man to me. |
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Accident Prone
Posts: 22277
Location: 100 miles from Nowhere, AR | Blueridgedreaming - 2015-08-17 10:38 AM It is very possible that he sent non-verbals! I am sure he acted upset. As far as acting christian.. Yes we are disappointed but haven't struck out at this man at all. I came here for advice and encouragement because I would never want people to think badly of us for talking about it here in our town. Seemed like a safer place to vent here and people have given great insight! I appreciate all the great advice. And we will try our best to move forward. I do think others would also be shocked/disheartened in a similar situation. Yes we are grateful for the paycheck. But the owner knows the sawmill can be dangerous work specially for someone with little experiences. But hard work is good for people-we are not above that by any means!
I don't think you've done or said anything wrong here. You needed to vent and to have a sounding board to help get some perspective. Totally understandable. I'd say most of us need to talk through difficult situations to get to the acceptance of what we know to be true but struggle to comprehend.
And let me tell you, my dad SUCKS at firing people. He doesn't like confrontation and doesn't want anyone to be mad at him, so he tends to not handle it as well as he should. And puts it off longer than he should. I still think the business owner intended kindness in how he went about this, but his execution was obviously lacking. |
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 512
| Three 4 Luck - 2015-08-17 10:51 AM
Blueridgedreaming - 2015-08-17 10:38 AM It is very possible that he sent non-verbals! I am sure he acted upset. As far as acting christian.. Yes we are disappointed but haven't struck out at this man at all. I came here for advice and encouragement because I would never want people to think badly of us for talking about it here in our town. Seemed like a safer place to vent here and people have given great insight! I appreciate all the great advice. And we will try our best to move forward. I do think others would also be shocked/disheartened in a similar situation. Yes we are grateful for the paycheck. But the owner knows the sawmill can be dangerous work specially for someone with little experiences. But hard work is good for people-we are not above that by any means!
I don't think you've done or said anything wrong here. You needed to vent and to have a sounding board to help get some perspective. Totally understandable. I'd say most of us need to talk through difficult situations to get to the acceptance of what we know to be true but struggle to comprehend. And let me tell you, my dad SUCKS at firing people. He doesn't like confrontation and doesn't want anyone to be mad at him, so he tends to not handle it as well as he should. And puts it off longer than he should. I still think the business owner intended kindness in how he went about this, but his execution was obviously lacking.
Thank you!
And thank you for a good laugh! Lol.
I know it wasn't easy for him to fire my husband or demote him. And I have realized so many good things about the situation from all you board buddies! I am so thankful for your perspectives! And I am thankful I came here instead of friends around home. I would never want the owner to think we were gossiping about them but venting to you all sure felt good! |
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Common Sense and then some
Location: So. California | Blueridgedreaming - 2015-08-17 8:55 AM Three 4 Luck - 2015-08-17 10:51 AM Blueridgedreaming - 2015-08-17 10:38 AM It is very possible that he sent non-verbals! I am sure he acted upset. As far as acting christian.. Yes we are disappointed but haven't struck out at this man at all. I came here for advice and encouragement because I would never want people to think badly of us for talking about it here in our town. Seemed like a safer place to vent here and people have given great insight! I appreciate all the great advice. And we will try our best to move forward. I do think others would also be shocked/disheartened in a similar situation. Yes we are grateful for the paycheck. But the owner knows the sawmill can be dangerous work specially for someone with little experiences. But hard work is good for people-we are not above that by any means! I don't think you've done or said anything wrong here. You needed to vent and to have a sounding board to help get some perspective. Totally understandable. I'd say most of us need to talk through difficult situations to get to the acceptance of what we know to be true but struggle to comprehend.
And let me tell you, my dad SUCKS at firing people. He doesn't like confrontation and doesn't want anyone to be mad at him, so he tends to not handle it as well as he should. And puts it off longer than he should. I still think the business owner intended kindness in how he went about this, but his execution was obviously lacking. Thank you! And thank you for a good laugh! Lol. I know it wasn't easy for him to fire my husband or demote him. And I have realized so many good things about the situation from all you board buddies! I am so thankful for your perspectives! And I am thankful I came here instead of friends around home. I would never want the owner to think we were gossiping about them but venting to you all sure felt good!
You are looking at this from YOUR perspective which is totally understandable.
Now, take a look at this situation from the owner/boss's perspective. He may need to reduce labor expense, his first priority is to keep his family employeed/earning money. Second priority is to other employees that are trying hard, but may not be meeting sales quota's or bringing in business at a level that would justify keeping that position open. Doesn't matter how "nice" or "christian" the employee is, are they bringing in enough business or increasing the profit margin to justify the position? Hard worker or not, the expense might not be justifiable and the boss may have been trying to make it work for months...
The cost of employee is more than just the salary $. It's insurance, workman's comp, federal taxes, etc... I think the boss handled it to the best of his ability. Business is business, it's not personal.
Although you (and your husband) may not like what has transpired at this company, it may be that God has something better in store and this is just a learning curve, stepping stone to the next pathway your husband is supposed to take. 
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Sideways Riding Expert
Posts: 11371
Location: ND--it snows, it floods, it snows, it floods | Maybe this is the push that you guys needed for your husband to up his ministry. |
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 A Barrel Of Monkeys
Posts: 12972
Location: Texas | Just a word of encouragement for you:
Years ago, I was fired for unjust reasons but in a right to work state, it is what it is. I was shocked, hurt and dismayed. I filed unemployment and got it.
That gave me time to start a business I'd wanted to start for years but was too tied to a job to even consider it. I worked that business until I retired.
Maybe this is God's way of setting ya'll up for something bigger and better!!
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 512
| Thank you all for helping me see the good and looking at it from the owner's standpoint! |
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I Really Love Jeans
Posts: 3173
Location: North Dakota | We are in the same boat! My husband was given two weeks notice only! We are selling our home and other assets and will be forced to start over! My husbands father passed away and had no insurance so we are broke and in serious debt due to paying for a funeral and now taking care of mother in law who doesn't have a job or the mental ability to hold one. When he lost that job we were living pay check to pay check, now we are forced to sell everything we own to pay off hospital so they don't take mother in laws house , which is also still mortgaged! I am sorry but all you can do is just keep moving forward and look for better employment. Sometimes we are forced to start over in life! Good luck!!! |
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 512
| angelica - 2015-08-17 4:01 PM
We are in the same boat! My husband was given two weeks notice only! We are selling our home and other assets and will be forced to start over! My husbands father passed away and had no insurance so we are broke and in serious debt due to paying for a funeral and now taking care of mother in law who doesn't have a job or the mental ability to hold one. When he lost that job we were living pay check to pay check, now we are forced to sell everything we own to pay off hospital so they don't take mother in laws house , which is also still mortgaged! I am sorry but all you can do is just keep moving forward and look for better employment. Sometimes we are forced to start over in life! Good luck!!!
Best of luck to you!! Praying for you! It will all work out for both of us! |
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My Heart Be Happy
Posts: 9159
Location: Arkansas | Three 4 Luck - 2015-08-17 10:51 AM
Blueridgedreaming - 2015-08-17 10:38 AM It is very possible that he sent non-verbals! I am sure he acted upset. As far as acting christian.. Yes we are disappointed but haven't struck out at this man at all. I came here for advice and encouragement because I would never want people to think badly of us for talking about it here in our town. Seemed like a safer place to vent here and people have given great insight! I appreciate all the great advice. And we will try our best to move forward. I do think others would also be shocked/disheartened in a similar situation. Yes we are grateful for the paycheck. But the owner knows the sawmill can be dangerous work specially for someone with little experiences. But hard work is good for people-we are not above that by any means!
I don't think you've done or said anything wrong here. You needed to vent and to have a sounding board to help get some perspective. Totally understandable. I'd say most of us need to talk through difficult situations to get to the acceptance of what we know to be true but struggle to comprehend. And let me tell you, my dad SUCKS at firing people. He doesn't like confrontation and doesn't want anyone to be mad at him, so he tends to not handle it as well as he should. And puts it off longer than he should. I still think the business owner intended kindness in how he went about this, but his execution was obviously lacking.
You absolutely said it the best! |
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My Heart Be Happy
Posts: 9159
Location: Arkansas | Blueridgedreaming - 2015-08-17 1:07 PM
Thank you all for helping me see the good and looking at it from the owner's standpoint!
I think you have been quite respectful in everything you have said on here, and I think you made the right decision to talk about your feelings on here rather than your home town. Sometimes we just need to get stuff out of our system and hopefully let our peers make us feel better!! Good luck to your family in the next situation God provides for you.
To Angelica----prayers for you and your family while y'all are going thru this tough time. |
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 512
| Chandler's Mom - 2015-08-18 12:53 AM
Blueridgedreaming - 2015-08-17 1:07 PM
Thank you all for helping me see the good and looking at it from the owner's standpoint!
I think you have been quite respectful in everything you have said on here, and I think you made the right decision to talk about your feelings on here rather than your home town. Sometimes we just need to get stuff out of our system and hopefully let our peers make us feel better!! Good luck to your family in the next situation God provides for you.
To Angelica----prayers for you and your family while y'all are going thru this tough time.
Thank you so much for the kind words!
Now that we have had a few days to process the situation and after reflecting off of everyone here we feel much better!
We can see from the owner's standpoints his struggle to maintain his business. The only thing we wished was different is that he could have been honest and transparent in his reasoning. If the company can't afford my husband than just say that! Don't just say God told you-because we believe God would have shown us too!
Anyhow, bless you all! |
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Advice on husband's job?