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 Total Germophobe
Posts: 6443
   
Location: Montana | I have a 3 y/o filly that is a gorgeous horse, has 60 days riding by a trainer, plus the riding that I've given her since then. She doesn't do anything "bad", just colt stuff sometimes, and she actually is doing pretty good for as green as she is. BUT every time I go to ride her, I dread it. It sounds terrible, but I dread riding her. And here's why...I had a 3 y/o gelding a couple of years ago that went total rodeo bronc on me out of the blue (literally)...I checked everything and rode him in the same thing before that day and after that day. And I rode him through it, and to my knowledge hasn't done it again (I sold him after that...I was afraid it would happen again). But I'm afraid every time I get on that filly, that something like that will happen, only instead of riding her through it I'll get hurt. It has made my riding time miserable instead of my happy time.
So either I need A) to sell her and find something I don't have that worry about or B) figure a way how to get myself esteem and self confidence back up so I want to go out and ride her!
What would you guys do and what suggestions might you have? I have my old steady Eddy mare and I love riding her! I would spend all day on her if I could...but I've had her 8 years and she is as dependable as the day is long and I'm confident on her, just not on my filly (at least at first, usually by the end of the ride I'm OK).
Maybe I'm just not well suited for colts? Would more training on her with possible lessons for me make things better?
Sorry for such a book, but this has been bothering me ever since I have started getting horses in shape this spring. | |
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 Extreme Veteran
Posts: 460
| I'm sorry you're feeling that way =[ That makes it so hard to enjoy her. What is your plan with her? If you are wanting to do futurities, rodeos? Do you do a lot of arena work? Maybe just take some time away from the arena, and just go have some fun with her =] Do some trail riding, go on a few poker runs, just try to be in a relaxing environment for her. And it'll kill two birds with one stone! You will be more relaxed, and she will just get more and more bombproof =] | |
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Total Germophobe
Posts: 6443
Location: Montana | Katielovestbs - 2017-03-31 12:44 PM I'm sorry you're feeling that way =[ That makes it so hard to enjoy her. What is your plan with her? If you are wanting to do futurities, rodeos? Do you do a lot of arena work? Maybe just take some time away from the arena, and just go have some fun with her =] Do some trail riding, go on a few poker runs, just try to be in a relaxing environment for her. And it'll kill two birds with one stone! You will be more relaxed, and she will just get more and more bombproof =]
I'm hoping to futurity her...that was the original intention. I try to do different things. I don't have an actual "arena" to ride in, so I use alfalfa, stubble, plowed fields, and do all different things with her, but it is similar to arena work, but different because there are all kinds of things going on (the other day 8 deer running towards us, LOL). Thank you for the advice! | |
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 A Somebody to Everybody
Posts: 41354
Location: Under The Big Sky Of Texas | If you dont have the condifence to ride her and your riding by your self, I would send her off to get more saddle time on her and when the time is right I would ride with the trainer to build up your self confidence or sell her so you dont have to have that dreaded feeling when you ride her. Sell her and get something thats not so young and is broke so you can enjoy the ride. | |
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  Neat Freak
Posts: 11216
Location: Wonderful Wyoming | mtcanchazer - 2017-03-31 12:37 PM I have a 3 y/o filly that is a gorgeous horse, has 60 days riding by a trainer, plus the riding that I've given her since then. She doesn't do anything "bad", just colt stuff sometimes, and she actually is doing pretty good for as green as she is. BUT every time I go to ride her, I dread it. It sounds terrible, but I dread riding her. And here's why...I had a 3 y/o gelding a couple of years ago that went total rodeo bronc on me out of the blue (literally)...I checked everything and rode him in the same thing before that day and after that day. And I rode him through it, and to my knowledge hasn't done it again (I sold him after that...I was afraid it would happen again). But I'm afraid every time I get on that filly, that something like that will happen, only instead of riding her through it I'll get hurt. It has made my riding time miserable instead of my happy time.
So either I need A) to sell her and find something I don't have that worry about or B) figure a way how to get myself esteem and self confidence back up so I want to go out and ride her!
What would you guys do and what suggestions might you have? I have my old steady Eddy mare and I love riding her! I would spend all day on her if I could...but I've had her 8 years and she is as dependable as the day is long and I'm confident on her, just not on my filly (at least at first, usually by the end of the ride I'm OK).
Maybe I'm just not well suited for colts? Would more training on her with possible lessons for me make things better?
Sorry for such a book, but this has been bothering me ever since I have started getting horses in shape this spring. Sounds like what I am going through after my show horse fiasco. He has been an angel for over a year now, but I still lack a lot of confidence and that is with other horses too. I would almost recommend keeping her if you like her and trying to work on your mental block. I think it is all in your head, same as me. A new horse won't help if you have what I have. I started off by having my friend ride him before me, then I would get on and go over what she was working with him on. Slowly I have worked up the ability to get after him if he starts to act up (so something spoiled) and I am usually the only one that rides him now when we ride together. After our first show last summer, I got off after a nice ride, and started to cry like a baby. All my friends that know what I have been through with him were shocked...thinking I should be elated. I had to try and explain that all the emotion and turmoil that has been inside of me, just fell out lol, I was just SOO happy. That I survived, that he is the horse I always knew he could be. Just a lot of emotion. It has been a long road. I used to get anxiety days before I ever rode him just knowing we had planned a riding session. Now that is gone and I am looking forward to enjoying the ride. I still can't make myself ride him when I am home alone and he hasn't done a thing wrong. Just a mental block.
Edited by wyoming barrel racer 2017-03-31 3:21 PM
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Veteran
Posts: 233
| How much bareback work and riding without stirrups do you do? I find my confidence level is directly related to my riding ability. Go find a dressage trainer and take a couple longe lessons. It really does help. | |
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 Take a Picture
Posts: 12841
 
| This is the way that I feel. Riding is supposed to be fun. If you do not feel confident, get an older horse that will build your confidence. One that you can't wait to get to go get on for that wonderful evening ride. A futurity horse is very expensive with not much chance to recoup your entry fees. That is a super tough way to compete. When I think about ridding a young horse at home, by myself, I think of my friend Deb Mohon who went to the NFR 11 times. Deb was killed on a young horse. at her house. (She was not riding alone). All of us around here think about that frequently. | |
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Total Germophobe
Posts: 6443
Location: Montana | wyoming barrel racer - 2017-03-31 2:18 PM mtcanchazer - 2017-03-31 12:37 PM I have a 3 y/o filly that is a gorgeous horse, has 60 days riding by a trainer, plus the riding that I've given her since then. She doesn't do anything "bad", just colt stuff sometimes, and she actually is doing pretty good for as green as she is. BUT every time I go to ride her, I dread it. It sounds terrible, but I dread riding her. And here's why...I had a 3 y/o gelding a couple of years ago that went total rodeo bronc on me out of the blue (literally)...I checked everything and rode him in the same thing before that day and after that day. And I rode him through it, and to my knowledge hasn't done it again (I sold him after that...I was afraid it would happen again). But I'm afraid every time I get on that filly, that something like that will happen, only instead of riding her through it I'll get hurt. It has made my riding time miserable instead of my happy time.
So either I need A) to sell her and find something I don't have that worry about or B) figure a way how to get myself esteem and self confidence back up so I want to go out and ride her!
What would you guys do and what suggestions might you have? I have my old steady Eddy mare and I love riding her! I would spend all day on her if I could...but I've had her 8 years and she is as dependable as the day is long and I'm confident on her, just not on my filly (at least at first, usually by the end of the ride I'm OK).
Maybe I'm just not well suited for colts? Would more training on her with possible lessons for me make things better?
Sorry for such a book, but this has been bothering me ever since I have started getting horses in shape this spring. Sounds like what I am going through after my show horse fiasco. He has been an angel for over a year now, but I still lack a lot of confidence and that is with other horses too. I would almost recommend keeping her if you like her and trying to work on your mental block. I think it is all in your head, same as me. A new horse won't help if you have what I have. I started off by having my friend ride him before me, then I would get on and go over what she was working with him on. Slowly I have worked up the ability to get after him if he starts to act up (so something spoiled) and I am usually the only one that rides him now when we ride together. After our first show last summer, I got off after a nice ride, and started to cry like a baby. All my friends that know what I have been through with him were shocked...thinking I should be elated. I had to try and explain that all the emotion and turmoil that has been inside of me, just fell out lol, I was just SOO happy. That I survived, that he is the horse I always knew he could be. Just a lot of emotion. It has been a long road. I used to get anxiety days before I ever rode him just knowing we had planned a riding session. Now that is gone and I am looking forward to enjoying the ride. I still can't make myself ride him when I am home alone and he hasn't done a thing wrong. Just a mental block.
I totally understand the emotion! And it is tiring. I'm trying to get over the mental block, and I try to keep myself positive and looking forward, but I am like you were...I get terrible anxiety at times realizing I need to rider her to get her in shape and keep her moving forward in he training. She had 60 days with a trainer last fall, and the same trainer that re-started my good mare (she had been out to pasture for a couple years), so I'm pretty confident of his ability. I also have the possibility of sending her back to him in June, if I knew for sure that it would help me get over my mental block. I had a lesson with him when I got her back, and all went well, I just quite know how to go about forward thinking with her.
Hannahbug...I haven't had a chance to do much bareback riding lately, but I have been working out/strength exercises in order to be a better rider.
To All: I appreciate your advice...this is a challenging decision for me. I also appreciate your gentlenss and understanding of where I am at. I keep trying to move forward, but I know this mental block is holding me back. | |
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Neat Freak
Posts: 11216
Location: Wonderful Wyoming | mtcanchazer - 2017-03-31 9:25 PM wyoming barrel racer - 2017-03-31 2:18 PM mtcanchazer - 2017-03-31 12:37 PM I have a 3 y/o filly that is a gorgeous horse, has 60 days riding by a trainer, plus the riding that I've given her since then. She doesn't do anything "bad", just colt stuff sometimes, and she actually is doing pretty good for as green as she is. BUT every time I go to ride her, I dread it. It sounds terrible, but I dread riding her. And here's why...I had a 3 y/o gelding a couple of years ago that went total rodeo bronc on me out of the blue (literally)...I checked everything and rode him in the same thing before that day and after that day. And I rode him through it, and to my knowledge hasn't done it again (I sold him after that...I was afraid it would happen again). But I'm afraid every time I get on that filly, that something like that will happen, only instead of riding her through it I'll get hurt. It has made my riding time miserable instead of my happy time.
So either I need A) to sell her and find something I don't have that worry about or B) figure a way how to get myself esteem and self confidence back up so I want to go out and ride her!
What would you guys do and what suggestions might you have? I have my old steady Eddy mare and I love riding her! I would spend all day on her if I could...but I've had her 8 years and she is as dependable as the day is long and I'm confident on her, just not on my filly (at least at first, usually by the end of the ride I'm OK).
Maybe I'm just not well suited for colts? Would more training on her with possible lessons for me make things better?
Sorry for such a book, but this has been bothering me ever since I have started getting horses in shape this spring. Sounds like what I am going through after my show horse fiasco. He has been an angel for over a year now, but I still lack a lot of confidence and that is with other horses too. I would almost recommend keeping her if you like her and trying to work on your mental block. I think it is all in your head, same as me. A new horse won't help if you have what I have. I started off by having my friend ride him before me, then I would get on and go over what she was working with him on. Slowly I have worked up the ability to get after him if he starts to act up (so something spoiled) and I am usually the only one that rides him now when we ride together. After our first show last summer, I got off after a nice ride, and started to cry like a baby. All my friends that know what I have been through with him were shocked...thinking I should be elated. I had to try and explain that all the emotion and turmoil that has been inside of me, just fell out lol, I was just SOO happy. That I survived, that he is the horse I always knew he could be. Just a lot of emotion. It has been a long road. I used to get anxiety days before I ever rode him just knowing we had planned a riding session. Now that is gone and I am looking forward to enjoying the ride. I still can't make myself ride him when I am home alone and he hasn't done a thing wrong. Just a mental block.
Hannahbug...I haven't had a chance to do much bareback riding lately, but I have been working out/strength exercises in order to be a better rider.
To All: I appreciate your advice...this is a challenging decision for me. I also appreciate your gentlenss and understanding of where I am at. I keep trying to move forward, but I know this mental block is holding me back.
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Total Germophobe
Posts: 6443
Location: Montana | wyoming barrel racer - 2017-04-01 8:15 PM mtcanchazer - 2017-03-31 9:25 PM wyoming barrel racer - 2017-03-31 2:18 PM mtcanchazer - 2017-03-31 12:37 PM I have a 3 y/o filly that is a gorgeous horse, has 60 days riding by a trainer, plus the riding that I've given her since then. She doesn't do anything "bad", just colt stuff sometimes, and she actually is doing pretty good for as green as she is. BUT every time I go to ride her, I dread it. It sounds terrible, but I dread riding her. And here's why...I had a 3 y/o gelding a couple of years ago that went total rodeo bronc on me out of the blue (literally)...I checked everything and rode him in the same thing before that day and after that day. And I rode him through it, and to my knowledge hasn't done it again (I sold him after that...I was afraid it would happen again). But I'm afraid every time I get on that filly, that something like that will happen, only instead of riding her through it I'll get hurt. It has made my riding time miserable instead of my happy time.
So either I need A) to sell her and find something I don't have that worry about or B) figure a way how to get myself esteem and self confidence back up so I want to go out and ride her!
What would you guys do and what suggestions might you have? I have my old steady Eddy mare and I love riding her! I would spend all day on her if I could...but I've had her 8 years and she is as dependable as the day is long and I'm confident on her, just not on my filly (at least at first, usually by the end of the ride I'm OK).
Maybe I'm just not well suited for colts? Would more training on her with possible lessons for me make things better?
Sorry for such a book, but this has been bothering me ever since I have started getting horses in shape this spring. Sounds like what I am going through after my show horse fiasco. He has been an angel for over a year now, but I still lack a lot of confidence and that is with other horses too. I would almost recommend keeping her if you like her and trying to work on your mental block. I think it is all in your head, same as me. A new horse won't help if you have what I have. I started off by having my friend ride him before me, then I would get on and go over what she was working with him on. Slowly I have worked up the ability to get after him if he starts to act up (so something spoiled) and I am usually the only one that rides him now when we ride together. After our first show last summer, I got off after a nice ride, and started to cry like a baby. All my friends that know what I have been through with him were shocked...thinking I should be elated. I had to try and explain that all the emotion and turmoil that has been inside of me, just fell out lol, I was just SOO happy. That I survived, that he is the horse I always knew he could be. Just a lot of emotion. It has been a long road. I used to get anxiety days before I ever rode him just knowing we had planned a riding session. Now that is gone and I am looking forward to enjoying the ride. I still can't make myself ride him when I am home alone and he hasn't done a thing wrong. Just a mental block.
Hannahbug...I haven't had a chance to do much bareback riding lately, but I have been working out/strength exercises in order to be a better rider.
To All: I appreciate your advice...this is a challenging decision for me. I also appreciate your gentlenss and understanding of where I am at. I keep trying to move forward, but I know this mental block is holding me back.
You're a sweet lady! | |
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 Money Eating Baggage Owner
Posts: 9586
Location: Phoenix | Southtxponygirl - 2017-03-31 12:44 PM If you dont have the condifence to ride her and your riding by your self, I would send her off to get more saddle time on her and when the time is right I would ride with the trainer to build up your self confidence or sell her so you dont have to have that dreaded feeling when you ride her. Sell her and get something thats not so young and is broke so you can enjoy the ride.
This. She needs to be a different level of broke for you to feel comfortable riding her without an arena. | |
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Tried and True
Posts: 21185
Location: Where I am happiest | Yep. send her out for more training. You will be much happier in the end. | |
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 Elite Veteran
Posts: 899
Location: Idaho | mtcanchazer - 2017-04-01 11:37 AM
I have a 3 y/o filly that is a gorgeous horse, has 60 days riding by a trainer, plus the riding that I've given her since then. She doesn't do anything "bad", just colt stuff sometimes, and she actually is doing pretty good for as green as she is. BUT every time I go to ride her, I dread it. It sounds terrible, but I dread riding her. And here's why...I had a 3 y/o gelding a couple of years ago that went total rodeo bronc on me out of the blue (literally)...I checked everything and rode him in the same thing before that day and after that day. And I rode him through it, and to my knowledge hasn't done it again (I sold him after that...I was afraid it would happen again). But I'm afraid every time I get on that filly, that something like that will happen, only instead of riding her through it I'll get hurt. It has made my riding time miserable instead of my happy time.
So either I need A) to sell her and find something I don't have that worry about or B) figure a way how to get myself esteem and self confidence back up so I want to go out and ride her!
What would you guys do and what suggestions might you have? I have my old steady Eddy mare and I love riding her! I would spend all day on her if I could...but I've had her 8 years and she is as dependable as the day is long and I'm confident on her, just not on my filly (at least at first, usually by the end of the ride I'm OK).
Maybe I'm just not well suited for colts? Would more training on her with possible lessons for me make things better?
Sorry for such a book, but this has been bothering me ever since I have started getting horses in shape this spring.
I know this feeling! I had the same problem when my now going on 6 year old was getting broke. On his tenth ride, I got a little cocky and wasn't paying attention, thought he was okay, didn't ground work him long enough and decided to get on. Well I scared him getting on, and he threw me super hard. That was the ONLY time he has offered to buck under saddle since he had a saddle thrown on his back. It was totally my fault. I was scared to death to get back on him. Swung back and forth so many times about selling him. But then I decided to send him off to a friend to put some rides on him.
But anyway, my friend put 60 days on him. Had him walk, trot, loping, backing up, throwing ropes off him, she even took him on a few trails around the neighborhood. It still took me a LONG time to get comfortable with him. I still struggled, saying I wanted to sell him for something that was more finished, but 3 years later I am beyond glad I stuck with him because now I have a horse that I know doesn't have any problems, hasn't been mistreated, has been updated on his vaccines, teeth, deworming, chiro etc. and I know he has been taken care of and I don't have to worry about someone being dishonest with me lol he can make a pretty barrel and pole pattern, goes on trail rides, works cows, pony other horses, is willing to do just about anything I ask of him and I KNOW him, so if anything is bothering him I catch onto it right away.. and that is SO nice!! Oh AND I loped him in circles bridleless the first time the other day too!
But really when it comes to your filly, I would think that the decision is really up to you. I ended up not selling mine because I felt I put too much work into him, to get what I think he would be worth. Plus it's nice to be able to know my horse. I will say that having colts is not for everyone, I truly have a lot of respect for people who train their own babies time and time again. I don't know if I would do it again.
If you do end up keeping your filly, I would say find someone to ride with you. I wouldn't have gotten this far if I didn't have help. I had a lot of good friends and trainers who told me to keep him, and kept pushing me to ride, ride, ride. Even when I moved to Oklahoma, I met some people who went on trails who were supportive, but at the same time pushed me out of my comfort zone (while still knowing someone was there in case something did happen) to show me that my horse was a good horse, and he will do what I ask of him without wanting (in my mind) to kill me.
So that would be my bit of advice.
Edited by DashNDustem 2017-04-03 3:07 PM
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Total Germophobe
Posts: 6443
Location: Montana | DashNDustem - 2017-04-03 2:03 PM mtcanchazer - 2017-04-01 11:37 AM I have a 3 y/o filly that is a gorgeous horse, has 60 days riding by a trainer, plus the riding that I've given her since then. She doesn't do anything "bad", just colt stuff sometimes, and she actually is doing pretty good for as green as she is. BUT every time I go to ride her, I dread it. It sounds terrible, but I dread riding her. And here's why...I had a 3 y/o gelding a couple of years ago that went total rodeo bronc on me out of the blue (literally)...I checked everything and rode him in the same thing before that day and after that day. And I rode him through it, and to my knowledge hasn't done it again (I sold him after that...I was afraid it would happen again). But I'm afraid every time I get on that filly, that something like that will happen, only instead of riding her through it I'll get hurt. It has made my riding time miserable instead of my happy time.
So either I need A) to sell her and find something I don't have that worry about or B) figure a way how to get myself esteem and self confidence back up so I want to go out and ride her!
What would you guys do and what suggestions might you have? I have my old steady Eddy mare and I love riding her! I would spend all day on her if I could...but I've had her 8 years and she is as dependable as the day is long and I'm confident on her, just not on my filly (at least at first, usually by the end of the ride I'm OK).
Maybe I'm just not well suited for colts? Would more training on her with possible lessons for me make things better?
Sorry for such a book, but this has been bothering me ever since I have started getting horses in shape this spring. I know this feeling! I had the same problem when my now going on 6 year old was getting broke. On his tenth ride, I got a little cocky and wasn't paying attention, thought he was okay, didn't ground work him long enough and decided to get on. Well I scared him getting on, and he threw me super hard. That was the ONLY time he has offered to buck under saddle since he had a saddle thrown on his back. It was totally my fault. I was scared to death to get back on him. Swung back and forth so many times about selling him. But then I decided to send him off to a friend to put some rides on him. But anyway, my friend put 60 days on him. Had him walk, trot, loping, backing up, throwing ropes off him, she even took him on a few trails around the neighborhood. It still took me a LONG time to get comfortable with him. I still struggled, saying I wanted to sell him for something that was more finished, but 3 years later I am beyond glad I stuck with him because now I have a horse that I know doesn't have any problems, hasn't been mistreated, has been updated on his vaccines, teeth, deworming, chiro etc. and I know he has been taken care of and I don't have to worry about someone being dishonest with me lol he can make a pretty barrel and pole pattern, goes on trail rides, works cows, pony other horses, is willing to do just about anything I ask of him and I KNOW him, so if anything is bothering him I catch onto it right away.. and that is SO nice!! Oh AND I loped him in circles bridleless the first time the other day too! But really when it comes to your filly, I would think that the decision is really up to you. I ended up not selling mine because I felt I put too much work into him, to get what I think he would be worth. Plus it's nice to be able to know my horse. I will say that having colts is not for everyone, I truly have a lot of respect for people who train their own babies time and time again. I don't know if I would do it again. If you do end up keeping your filly, I would say find someone to ride with you. I wouldn't have gotten this far if I didn't have help. I had a lot of good friends and trainers who told me to keep him, and kept pushing me to ride, ride, ride. Even when I moved to Oklahoma, I met some people who went on trails who were supportive, but at the same time pushed me out of my comfort zone (while still knowing someone was there in case something did happen ) to show me that my horse was a good horse, and he will do what I ask of him without wanting (in my mind ) to kill me. So that would be my bit of advice.
This is very encouraging, thank you! | |
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Elite Veteran
Posts: 695
Location: Windoming | No advice, just that I know how you feel. After a gelding that I considered bomb proof unexpectedly bucked me off during a barrel run last year, I find myself very distrustful now. I've been bucked off before (other horses), but I usually was aware or had some warning that it was going to happen. Not that time. | |
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 My Heart Be Happy
Posts: 9159
Location: Arkansas | mtcanchazer - 2017-03-31 1:37 PM
I have a 3 y/o filly that is a gorgeous horse, has 60 days riding by a trainer, plus the riding that I've given her since then. She doesn't do anything "bad", just colt stuff sometimes, and she actually is doing pretty good for as green as she is. BUT every time I go to ride her, I dread it. It sounds terrible, but I dread riding her. And here's why...I had a 3 y/o gelding a couple of years ago that went total rodeo bronc on me out of the blue (literally)...I checked everything and rode him in the same thing before that day and after that day. And I rode him through it, and to my knowledge hasn't done it again (I sold him after that...I was afraid it would happen again). But I'm afraid every time I get on that filly, that something like that will happen, only instead of riding her through it I'll get hurt. It has made my riding time miserable instead of my happy time.
So either I need A) to sell her and find something I don't have that worry about or B) figure a way how to get myself esteem and self confidence back up so I want to go out and ride her!
What would you guys do and what suggestions might you have? I have my old steady Eddy mare and I love riding her! I would spend all day on her if I could...but I've had her 8 years and she is as dependable as the day is long and I'm confident on her, just not on my filly (at least at first, usually by the end of the ride I'm OK).
Maybe I'm just not well suited for colts? Would more training on her with possible lessons for me make things better?
Sorry for such a book, but this has been bothering me ever since I have started getting horses in shape this spring.
Sending hugs your way and hoping you keep us posted on your journey with your girl. Cause I'm also hoping you keep her and she pays you back with being just the horse you think she is  | |
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Total Germophobe
Posts: 6443
Location: Montana | Thank you all so very much for the encouragement! I'm trying to be positive and forward thinking with her. Saturday we had a REALLY good day riding, and I'm trying to continue working with her. | |
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Expert
Posts: 1280
Location: Texas | I do know how you feel. I have said over and over that this the the last time you will ever see me riding a colt!! Mine is 4 this year, and last year was hard...I didn't sell for the same reason as you, I have too much time, energy, work, blood, sweat, and tears invested. I wish I had never decided to buy a colt, but I love mine to pieces. I am just too darn old for this. I have missed a millioin barrel races the last couple of years, and it is not fun. I am so ready to get going now, but he is not ready. We are getting closer every day though. Hang in there! | |
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 Expert
Posts: 1611
Location: bring on the heat, NV | I was and am in the same boat as you ladies (mtcanchaser wyoming ). Ive sold a few that I let the anixety rule and talk myself out of...and regretted it badly. A new horse never helped irregardless of how broke for the most part (it does help for them to broker but they are still just horses and a hiccup here or there still kicks all that bad juju up). If you mesh with her mentally id send her out for another 90 days if possible to get a better handle and grab a few of those mental help equestrian books. There is The Riders Edge, The Winning Feel by Jane Sovie, and Mind Gym that helped me with some aspects of "the fear". I sure struggle esp if Ive been off them for long. That first couple rides... getting back on.. its hard.. helps if they are older and broke. I get over that threshold quicker but not really any easier? Same battle in my brain. Ive learned to push a little harder esp when I feel the nerves start talking me out of something. Riding with a trainer helps. Sorta makes one think they've got a safety net for a ride or two. My dressage magazine touched on a few things last month in the pysch column that was enlightening. There are some breathing techniques ive learned and shared with others from Jane's book that were helpful. My husbands words on my latest "maybe I should sell" situation... You can sell but it wont make it better and you arent probably gonna find another like her...  colts arent as fun for me as when i was kid though for dang sure... tough decision.
Edited by moapajetrider 2017-04-06 2:31 PM
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 To the Left
Posts: 1865
Location: Florida | Keep her and work it out. She is not the problem, you are. You need to get over your fear or else you will just find something to be afraid of in the next horse. Don't blame her for the other horse's mistake. | |
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Total Germophobe
Posts: 6443
Location: Montana | Vickie - 2017-04-06 5:38 PM
Keep her and work it out. She is not the problem, you are. You need to get over your fear or else you will just find something to be afraid of in the next horse. Don't blame her for the other horse's mistake.
I get where you are coming from. I'm not blaming her at all...that's why I'm trying to figure out how to get over my end of it. I feel so silly for feeling this way and I know I need to overcome it, I just haven't quite figured out the best way to do it.
Thanks all! | |
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 BHW Cheerleader!!
Posts: 6847
Location: Where it is too cold, SD | I completely understand where you are coming from!!! I had a horse buck me off in the middle of a run and I got hurt trying to stay on him. Should have just checked out but not how I was raised. After that I have been so scared of horses. My old reliable up and died on me in the middle of my mental rehab as well.
So I sent my horse off - even had my friend I bought him from run him.........he was great for them? Entered up again and he bucked me off again. So? Self esteem has been completely destroyed since.
I have since bought another horse and I am afraid to go fast. I can't seem to get off western pleasure speed without having an anxiety attack. Not to mention I have neuro issues and any anxiety causes siezures as well.
Every day - I can't wait to go ride until its time to swing a leg over him. So we just bought a new "reliable" ranch horse and I go to ride him today. I stood there and shook and cried. Scared to get on???
And all that fear does is make our horses feel it and they don't ride confident either.
I hear many many others telling to "get over it" and other things.............but? It really is hard to get over. I just keep telling myself that in time, it will come! And I keep getting on! Words from others just seem to make me worse too right?
Any how - being your mare is young..........I think send her off for more riding. Even 30 days.........she will ride better for you and help you along the way. | |
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 502
Location: United States | If you had a good ride on her Sunday and she made you smile and IF you have the time to keep committed to working with her, then do not quit on the opportunity yet. If your time is inconsistent then maybe it would be good for your soul to get a horse with more experience (not suggesting you are inexperienced).
I find that the older I get the more I appreciate a mature horse especially since I dont have futurity goals. Maybe if you set the bar of your goals lower, it will free up some stress and pressure. I sure do understand how you feel but only you can make the ultimate decision on your comfort zone. That being said, a 3 year old is very young minded and only time will commitment will comfort you as you have already noticed. They sure are rewarding when they work out. | |
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Keep or sell? Or how to get out of my funk?