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| Kinda long but the whole scenario needs to be known. About 4 months ago we let my husband's ex bring a horse to our house (for their daughter, pretty much) when she brought the horse, he was grossly underweight and injured.. not sure what happened to his leg but it was very swollen in the ankle. She said she had it x rayed but the vet said it needed that an mri done to see what was going on. She said her sister took the horse to get the mri done apparently they had a falling out and the mri results aren't available. Sounds fishy, but whatever.. she also said if we decided we couldn't keep him, she'd take him back no problem.. it didn't matter to her, I quote! I started feeding him up, worming , getting feet fixed, got a bunch of swelling out by poultice and cold hosing... step daughter was coming over daily to help clean stalls, water, feed, etc etc... then she started coming less and less frequently... she said it was costing her too much in gas to come over everyday. They live maybe 6 minutes from us, if that. The horse isn't sound... it's obvious where he's off..we decided we couldn't afford to take him for extensive x rays, mri whatnot... plus this ex refused to give us his papers... I actually had a friend who wanted him and would take him to the vet for whatever he needed and see if he could actually be fixed... ex refused to let the horse go unless this friend would pay $1000. My friend backed out... I don't blame her either!
Then the ex told my husband we can't have papers but she'd sign something saying she wouldn't sell him if he stayed with us. So fast forward... for the last month or so, step daughter hasn't even looked at the horse or come over to see him or ride him, he's rideable but very light and walking only... all his care has fallen on me, plus he's gotten aggressive with my daughters good colt that we just got back, kicking, biting and jumping on him. I have 1 medium sized pasture and I have 3 stall barn. I have 3 other horses, that our OURS. I'm having to stall horses up to keep the peace because of this horse.
So today, my husband made the call to the ex and said we are loading up the horse and bringing him back to you, we can't keep him here anymore. .. her answer was no... just put him down, she can't afford him anymore. Of course my step daughter is just hysterical... honestly we can't afford him as a pasture pet... every horse we have earns their keep... our pasture right now is good but it won't last much longer.. I don't even know what I've spent on getting him healthy again, minus the leg... my farrier says it's not fixable a few other people I respect say the same.. he's always going to be gimpy on it. I'm so angry right about the situation and her just saying put him down.. I'm trying not to lose my Jesus! |
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 A Somebody to Everybody
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              Location: Under The Big Sky Of Texas | Give him to your friend that was wanting him... |
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| Southtxponygirl - 2017-06-14 2:54 PM
Give him to your friend that was wanting him...
That opportunity passed, she got something else. Unfortunately. I've got a call out to her but I'm pretty sure it's going to be a no, since I know she's gotten another horse. And they board. |
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 A Somebody to Everybody
Posts: 41354
              Location: Under The Big Sky Of Texas | Will the Ex give you the papers on him? |
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| Southtxponygirl - 2017-06-14 3:08 PM
Will the Ex give you the papers on him?
If she has them and didn't give them to the sister, she might but I don't know. I think what upsets me the most is how she's just dumping this all on us... just put him down.. fine how about we haul him back to her and let her put him down... it's HER horse after all... she made that very clear. |
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 Shelter Dog Lover
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| want2chase3 - 2017-06-14 3:17 PM Southtxponygirl - 2017-06-14 3:08 PM Will the Ex give you the papers on him? If she has them and didn't give them to the sister, she might but I don't know. I think what upsets me the most is how she's just dumping this all on us... just put him down.. fine how about we haul him back to her and let her put him down... it's HER horse after all... she made that very clear.
I would haul him back anyway, she wants you to be the bad guy. Does your step daughter understand you are not in a position to keep him? |
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| rodeomom3 - 2017-06-14 3:25 PM
want2chase3 - 2017-06-14 3:17 PM Southtxponygirl - 2017-06-14 3:08 PM Will the Ex give you the papers on him? If she has them and didn't give them to the sister, she might but I don't know. I think what upsets me the most is how she's just dumping this all on us... just put him down.. fine how about we haul him back to her and let her put him down... it's HER horse after all... she made that very clear.
I would haul him back anyway, she wants you to be the bad guy. Does your step daughter understand you are not in a position to keep him?
That's what I just told him... load him up and take him to her house, let her deal with his fate.. yes we've talked to her several times about him, she's lobbying for another horse she can actually run barrels on and there's no way we can keep this one and take on another. |
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  Fact Checker
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       Location: Displaced Iowegian | LOAD HIM UP ...... and haul him back to her house..... and leave.....the horse is not your problem. |
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| Drop him off, in the front yard tied to a tree if necessary |
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| NJJ - 2017-06-14 3:48 PM
LOAD HIM UP ...... and haul him back to her house..... and leave.....the horse is not your problem.
I agree 10000% buuuuut my husband is a coward when it comes to her.. it hurts me to say that about him, but it's true and I've told him that . Having this horse here has caused us to argue more than we ever have! I want the horse GONE! |
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 A Somebody to Everybody
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              Location: Under The Big Sky Of Texas | want2chase3 - 2017-06-14 5:48 PM NJJ - 2017-06-14 3:48 PM LOAD HIM UP ...... and haul him back to her house..... and leave.....the horse is not your problem. I agree 10000% buuuuut my husband is a coward when it comes to her.. it hurts me to say that about him, but it's true and I've told him that . Having this horse here has caused us to argue more than we ever have! I want the horse GONE! Have you heard back from the friend that was wanting him yet? Thats pretty sorry of the Ex to be putting this all on you, shame on that woman and shame on the hubby to be putting you in this spot with her. Just wanted to add wish there was a way to help you out..
Edited by Southtxponygirl 2017-06-14 5:57 PM
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| Southtxponygirl - 2017-06-14 5:54 PM
want2chase3 - 2017-06-14 5:48 PM NJJ - 2017-06-14 3:48 PM LOAD HIM UP ...... and haul him back to her house..... and leave.....the horse is not your problem. I agree 10000% buuuuut my husband is a coward when it comes to her.. it hurts me to say that about him, but it's true and I've told him that . Having this horse here has caused us to argue more than we ever have! I want the horse GONE! Have you heard back from the friend that was wanting him yet? Thats pretty sorry of the Ex to be putting this all on you, shame on that woman and shame on the hubby to be putting you in this spot with her. Just wanted to add wish there was a way to help you out..
I haven't. I know her and she's probably begging her hubby, I left her a message of the situation. And she's probably trying to figure out a way before she calls me back. |
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Addicted to Baseball
        Location: Where the stars at night are big and bright, TX | Just have him put down. No horse needs to be walking this earth crippled and in pain no dumped on someone who will let it starve and continue to be in pain. Stepdaughter will move on and get over it faster than you think. |
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| Tilt The Kilt - 2017-06-14 6:16 PM
Just have him put down. No horse needs to be walking this earth crippled and in pain no dumped on someone who will let it starve and continue to be in pain. Stepdaughter will move on and get over it faster than you think.
I don't think he's in pain... you can poke his ankle flex it and he never flinched.. it's extremely hard. He's very sweet natured and likes being around people. He's not starving at my home, I'm working hard to find a solution for him. |
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| I called her myself... no answer so I text her to please call me so we can figure out what's best for the horse. .. haven't heard a thing. .. |
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| 1. You can let her be the heavy and tell her that you are bringing the horse to her house and tell her to have the vet meet you there. Drop the horse and leave.
2. Quietly, have the horse put down bury him and don't say anything.
3. Quietly, take the horse to the sale, drop him off and have them mail your check. Don't say anything.
4. Keep the horse and take care of him and quit complaining.
Personally, the less contact I have with ex-wives, the happier I am.
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 Hog Tie My Mojo
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       Location: Opelousas, LA | streakysox - 2017-06-14 11:59 PM 1. You can let her be the heavy and tell her that you are bringing the horse to her house and tell her to have the vet meet you there. Drop the horse and leave. 2. Quietly, have the horse put down bury him and don't say anything. 3. Quietly, take the horse to the sale, drop him off and have them mail your check. Don't say anything. 4. Keep the horse and take care of him and quit complaining. Personally, the less contact I have with ex-wives, the happier I am.
I like 2 and 3, either one works for me. |
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    Location: Southeast Louisiana | streakysox - 2017-06-14 11:59 PM 1. You can let her be the heavy and tell her that you are bringing the horse to her house and tell her to have the vet meet you there. Drop the horse and leave. 2. Quietly, have the horse put down bury him and don't say anything. 3. Quietly, take the horse to the sale, drop him off and have them mail your check. Don't say anything. 4. Keep the horse and take care of him and quit complaining. Personally, the less contact I have with ex-wives, the happier I am.
I second that!! Thank GOODNESS my husband's ex isn't into horses, because she is a manipulator (I'd call her a master manipulator, but, much like the other things in her life, although she devotes much of her time to it, she is transparent and kinda sucks at concealing it).
If she thought she she could screw with my husband and the rest of the family by buying a horse, she'd certainly do it. Thankfully, she wouldn't know where to start.
Anyway. Whatever you do, make your own decision for what is best for you and suck up the expense. Don't talk to her anymore. Don't involve her in the process. The horse is abandoned at this point. |
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Industrial Srength Barrel Racer
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| OMG! Your hubby's ex sounds like a bigger POS than my ex's ex and I didn't think that was even remotely possible.
BIG hugs and sorry you were put in this position. What a sucky deal! |
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| Are there any therapeutic riding associations in your area or barns looking for safe sweet trail horses?? |
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    Location: Somewhere around here | rodeomom3 - 2017-06-15 5:48 AM
Are there any therapeutic riding associations in your area or barns looking for safe sweet trail horses??
I agree.If he's a sweet horse (to people at least lol) then I'd try to give him away to a family that is looking for a kid-safe horse; aka me hahaha kidding.
"You don't throw a whole life away just 'cause he's banged up a little bit." - Seabiscuit |
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     Location: Do I hear Banjos? | Bear in mind that this is NOT your horse...she still claims ownership. If you have it put down or otherwise dispose of it (sell or give away)...she could claim she never told you to do that...and just imagine the DRAMA she could cause then.
Haul it to her...leave it there...and go home.
Alternative...get something in writing...notarized...from her giving ownership of the horse to you. Before you do anything. |
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| TrailGirl - 2017-06-15 7:52 AM
Bear in mind that this is NOT your horse...she still claims ownership. If you have it put down or otherwise dispose of it (sell or give away)...she could claim she never told you to do that...and just imagine the DRAMA she could cause then.
Haul it to her...leave it there...and go home.
Alternative...get something in writing...notarized...from her giving ownership of the horse to you. Before you do anything.
This is what I'm afraid of. She finally had her daughter call us back... she will come get the horse and have him put down. Of course my step daughter is hysterical at this point. She called again last night crying and said mom will pay you guys $100 a month if you keep him. Wow! I told my husband if she will give us the papers and sign a bill of sale to us for the horse, he can stay. The whole not giving us the papers but wanting to sign something saying she won't sell him makes my blood boil. If she agrees to release his papers and give up any ownership of him, I'm willing to keep him here and continue his care and possibly see if there are any treatments for his ankle. My heart is breaking for my stepdaughter at this point and I feel bad for the horse. |
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 A Somebody to Everybody
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              Location: Under The Big Sky Of Texas | want2chase3 - 2017-06-15 10:02 AM TrailGirl - 2017-06-15 7:52 AM Bear in mind that this is NOT your horse...she still claims ownership. If you have it put down or otherwise dispose of it (sell or give away)...she could claim she never told you to do that...and just imagine the DRAMA she could cause then. Haul it to her...leave it there...and go home. Alternative...get something in writing...notarized...from her giving ownership of the horse to you. Before you do anything. This is what I'm afraid of. She finally had her daughter call us back... she will come get the horse and have him put down. Of course my step daughter is hysterical at this point. She called again last night crying and said mom will pay you guys $100 a month if you keep him. Wow! I told my husband if she will give us the papers and sign a bill of sale to us for the horse, he can stay. The whole not giving us the papers but wanting to sign something saying she won't sell him makes my blood boil. If she agrees to release his papers and give up any ownership of him, I'm willing to keep him here and continue his care and possibly see if there are any treatments for his ankle. My heart is breaking for my stepdaughter at this point and I feel bad for the horse. That poor horse, I am one of the ones thats a softy when it comes to horses like this, theres no telling how hes going to be treated one hes back in the Exs hands she sounds like a mean person, I would try everyway to get her to sign a transfer for that horese so you can get him in your name and then you can do whatever is right by him by finding him a home or just keeping him, but you have got to get him legally your's befor you can do anything, so tell her this if she dont want to deal with this horse tell her if she will sign a transfer and give you the papers you will take care of the horse you dont have to say anything about finding him a home untill you get him in your name once hes in your name you can do anything you want with him..Edit to add, I dont think this horse deserves to be put down if hes got a chance to make someone happy.
Edited by Southtxponygirl 2017-06-15 10:50 AM
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| Southtxponygirl - 2017-06-15 10:36 AM
want2chase3 - 2017-06-15 10:02 AM TrailGirl - 2017-06-15 7:52 AM Bear in mind that this is NOT your horse...she still claims ownership. If you have it put down or otherwise dispose of it (sell or give away)...she could claim she never told you to do that...and just imagine the DRAMA she could cause then. Haul it to her...leave it there...and go home. Alternative...get something in writing...notarized...from her giving ownership of the horse to you. Before you do anything. This is what I'm afraid of. She finally had her daughter call us back... she will come get the horse and have him put down. Of course my step daughter is hysterical at this point. She called again last night crying and said mom will pay you guys $100 a month if you keep him. Wow! I told my husband if she will give us the papers and sign a bill of sale to us for the horse, he can stay. The whole not giving us the papers but wanting to sign something saying she won't sell him makes my blood boil. If she agrees to release his papers and give up any ownership of him, I'm willing to keep him here and continue his care and possibly see if there are any treatments for his ankle. My heart is breaking for my stepdaughter at this point and I feel bad for the horse. That poor horse, I am one of the ones thats a softy when it comes to horses like this, theres no telling how hes going to be treated one hes back in the Exs hands she sounds like a mean person, I would try everyway to get her to sign a transfer for that horese so you can get him in your name and then you can do whatever is right by him by finding him a home or just keeping him, but you have got to get him legally your's befor you can do anything, so tell her this if she dont want to deal with this horse tell her if she will sign a transfer and give you the papers you will take care of the horse you dont have to say anything about finding him a home untill you get him in your name once hes in your name you can do anything you want with him..Edit to add, I dont think this horse deserves to be put down if hes got a chance to make someone happy.
I don't think he needs to be put down either. He's happy just to be with my horses and knowing he's getting a few meals a day. I don't see any reason why she wouldn't sign a transfer but who knows... might not, just to be spiteful. I'm trying for my stepdaughter and for the horse. I'm waiting for the phone call. |
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I just read the headlines
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| I just don't understand her not wanting to sign the papers over to you. People are so weird. Good luck and prayers she does the decent thing- sign the papers over to you so the step daughter's little heart doesn't break.  |
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 A Somebody to Everybody
Posts: 41354
              Location: Under The Big Sky Of Texas | want2chase3 - 2017-06-15 10:55 AM Southtxponygirl - 2017-06-15 10:36 AM want2chase3 - 2017-06-15 10:02 AM TrailGirl - 2017-06-15 7:52 AM Bear in mind that this is NOT your horse...she still claims ownership. If you have it put down or otherwise dispose of it (sell or give away)...she could claim she never told you to do that...and just imagine the DRAMA she could cause then. Haul it to her...leave it there...and go home. Alternative...get something in writing...notarized...from her giving ownership of the horse to you. Before you do anything. This is what I'm afraid of. She finally had her daughter call us back... she will come get the horse and have him put down. Of course my step daughter is hysterical at this point. She called again last night crying and said mom will pay you guys $100 a month if you keep him. Wow! I told my husband if she will give us the papers and sign a bill of sale to us for the horse, he can stay. The whole not giving us the papers but wanting to sign something saying she won't sell him makes my blood boil. If she agrees to release his papers and give up any ownership of him, I'm willing to keep him here and continue his care and possibly see if there are any treatments for his ankle. My heart is breaking for my stepdaughter at this point and I feel bad for the horse. That poor horse, I am one of the ones thats a softy when it comes to horses like this, theres no telling how hes going to be treated one hes back in the Exs hands she sounds like a mean person, I would try everyway to get her to sign a transfer for that horese so you can get him in your name and then you can do whatever is right by him by finding him a home or just keeping him, but you have got to get him legally your's befor you can do anything, so tell her this if she dont want to deal with this horse tell her if she will sign a transfer and give you the papers you will take care of the horse you dont have to say anything about finding him a home untill you get him in your name once hes in your name you can do anything you want with him..Edit to add, I dont think this horse deserves to be put down if hes got a chance to make someone happy. I don't think he needs to be put down either. He's happy just to be with my horses and knowing he's getting a few meals a day. I don't see any reason why she wouldn't sign a transfer but who knows... might not, just to be spiteful. I'm trying for my stepdaughter and for the horse. I'm waiting for the phone call.
You sound like a really sweet lady to be having to be putting up with someones cra* and pettiness. I hope it all works out for this poor horse he sounds like he deserves a chance to make someone a happy owner. |
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      Location: The best kept secret in TX | GLP - 2017-06-15 11:00 AM I just don't understand her not wanting to sign the papers over to you. People are so weird. Good luck and prayers she does the decent thing- sign the papers over to you so the step daughter's little heart doesn't break. 
I think the birth mom was trying to make the step mom look bad and be the bad guy but instead it blew up in her face. I think she's recalculating her plan. Karma always wins with spiteful people. Hoping the daughter involved and horse involved are both okay after the outcome. Keep us updated. |
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 Dog Resuce Agent
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        Location: southeast Texas | Not releasing papers is a form of control |
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I just read the headlines
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| Yeah, I get the control part, but an animal's life and a little girl's heart are on the line. She sounds like a controlling, selfish person and I just can't understand those people. |
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Extreme Veteran
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 Location: Lost in the corn of Iowa. | want2chase3 - 2017-06-14 2:24 PM
Kinda long but the whole scenario needs to be known. About 4 months ago we let my husband's ex bring a horse to our house (for their daughter, pretty much) when she brought the horse, he was grossly underweight and injured.. not sure what happened to his leg but it was very swollen in the ankle. She said she had it x rayed but the vet said it needed that an mri done to see what was going on. She said her sister took the horse to get the mri done apparently they had a falling out and the mri results aren't available. Sounds fishy, but whatever.. she also said if we decided we couldn't keep him, she'd take him back no problem.. it didn't matter to her, I quote! I started feeding him up, worming , getting feet fixed, got a bunch of swelling out by poultice and cold hosing... step daughter was coming over daily to help clean stalls, water, feed, etc etc... then she started coming less and less frequently... she said it was costing her too much in gas to come over everyday. They live maybe 6 minutes from us, if that. The horse isn't sound... it's obvious where he's off..we decided we couldn't afford to take him for extensive x rays, mri whatnot... plus this ex refused to give us his papers... I actually had a friend who wanted him and would take him to the vet for whatever he needed and see if he could actually be fixed... ex refused to let the horse go unless this friend would pay $1000. My friend backed out... I don't blame her either!
Then the ex told my husband we can't have papers but she'd sign something saying she wouldn't sell him if he stayed with us. So fast forward... for the last month or so, step daughter hasn't even looked at the horse or come over to see him or ride him, he's rideable but very light and walking only... all his care has fallen on me, plus he's gotten aggressive with my daughters good colt that we just got back, kicking, biting and jumping on him. I have 1 medium sized pasture and I have 3 stall barn. I have 3 other horses, that our OURS. I'm having to stall horses up to keep the peace because of this horse.
So today, my husband made the call to the ex and said we are loading up the horse and bringing him back to you, we can't keep him here anymore. .. her answer was no... just put him down, she can't afford him anymore. Of course my step daughter is just hysterical... honestly we can't afford him as a pasture pet... every horse we have earns their keep... our pasture right now is good but it won't last much longer.. I don't even know what I've spent on getting him healthy again, minus the leg... my farrier says it's not fixable a few other people I respect say the same.. he's always going to be gimpy on it. I'm so angry right about the situation and her just saying put him down.. I'm trying not to lose my Jesus!
This is gonna sound harsh, but if no one around you will take the horse as a grade pasture pet to maybe lead the kids around on. Then I'd haul him to a sale barn and sell him as grade to get a small part of your money back. But you know he's gonna more than likely end up on a meat truck. |
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I just read the headlines
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| Girls_Gotta_Jet - 2017-06-15 11:31 AM
want2chase3 - 2017-06-14 2:24 PM
Kinda long but the whole scenario needs to be known. About 4 months ago we let my husband's ex bring a horse to our house (for their daughter, pretty much) when she brought the horse, he was grossly underweight and injured.. not sure what happened to his leg but it was very swollen in the ankle. She said she had it x rayed but the vet said it needed that an mri done to see what was going on. She said her sister took the horse to get the mri done apparently they had a falling out and the mri results aren't available. Sounds fishy, but whatever.. she also said if we decided we couldn't keep him, she'd take him back no problem.. it didn't matter to her, I quote! I started feeding him up, worming , getting feet fixed, got a bunch of swelling out by poultice and cold hosing... step daughter was coming over daily to help clean stalls, water, feed, etc etc... then she started coming less and less frequently... she said it was costing her too much in gas to come over everyday. They live maybe 6 minutes from us, if that. The horse isn't sound... it's obvious where he's off..we decided we couldn't afford to take him for extensive x rays, mri whatnot... plus this ex refused to give us his papers... I actually had a friend who wanted him and would take him to the vet for whatever he needed and see if he could actually be fixed... ex refused to let the horse go unless this friend would pay $1000. My friend backed out... I don't blame her either!
Then the ex told my husband we can't have papers but she'd sign something saying she wouldn't sell him if he stayed with us. So fast forward... for the last month or so, step daughter hasn't even looked at the horse or come over to see him or ride him, he's rideable but very light and walking only... all his care has fallen on me, plus he's gotten aggressive with my daughters good colt that we just got back, kicking, biting and jumping on him. I have 1 medium sized pasture and I have 3 stall barn. I have 3 other horses, that our OURS. I'm having to stall horses up to keep the peace because of this horse.
So today, my husband made the call to the ex and said we are loading up the horse and bringing him back to you, we can't keep him here anymore. .. her answer was no... just put him down, she can't afford him anymore. Of course my step daughter is just hysterical... honestly we can't afford him as a pasture pet... every horse we have earns their keep... our pasture right now is good but it won't last much longer.. I don't even know what I've spent on getting him healthy again, minus the leg... my farrier says it's not fixable a few other people I respect say the same.. he's always going to be gimpy on it. I'm so angry right about the situation and her just saying put him down.. I'm trying not to lose my Jesus!
This is gonna sound harsh, but if no one around you will take the horse as a grade pasture pet to maybe lead the kids around on. Then I'd haul him to a sale barn and sell him as grade to get a small part of your money back. But you know he's gonna more than likely end up on a meat truck.
if you take one to the sale, be sure you are ok with them dying a terrible death in Mexico. I won't sell one through the sale barn anymore because of that. They don't deserve it and I can get one of the cowboys to shoot one and just bury it on our place. However, I have also hauled one to the vet to put them down too. I just can't stomach the thought of Mexico.
I worked at the local sale barn for years and saw how those guys treat them. It is 10 times worse in Mexico. |
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| want2chase3 - 2017-06-15 10:02 AM
TrailGirl - 2017-06-15 7:52 AM
Bear in mind that this is NOT your horse...she still claims ownership. If you have it put down or otherwise dispose of it (sell or give away)...she could claim she never told you to do that...and just imagine the DRAMA she could cause then.
Haul it to her...leave it there...and go home.
Alternative...get something in writing...notarized...from her giving ownership of the horse to you. Before you do anything.
This is what I'm afraid of. She finally had her daughter call us back... she will come get the horse and have him put down. Of course my step daughter is hysterical at this point. She called again last night crying and said mom will pay you guys $100 a month if you keep him. Wow! I told my husband if she will give us the papers and sign a bill of sale to us for the horse, he can stay. The whole not giving us the papers but wanting to sign something saying she won't sell him makes my blood boil. If she agrees to release his papers and give up any ownership of him, I'm willing to keep him here and continue his care and possibly see if there are any treatments for his ankle. My heart is breaking for my stepdaughter at this point and I feel bad for the horse.
You just got manipulated and did not realize it!!
Always ask this question to yourself to find out if you
are being manipulated >>>
If I do not do what another person asks of me ... will I feel guilty?? ...
If you feel guilty .. you are being manipulated!!
Follow the Mother's input thru her daughter and
TAKE THE HORSE BACK WHEN SHE IS NOT HOME
AND DROP IT OFF ... make sure you take pictures
of the condition of the horse.!!
Explain to the step daughter in clear simple language
after you drop the horse off ...
Your Mother owns the horse and is the only one that
can make the decision what to do with the horse.
And let the step daughter know she is welcome to come ride
one of your horses or whatever her abilities are ..
STOP BEING A MOUSE AND END THE DRAMA NOW!!
OR YOUR MARRIAGE WILL SUFFER FOREVER!!
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 A Somebody to Everybody
Posts: 41354
              Location: Under The Big Sky Of Texas | Girls_Gotta_Jet - 2017-06-15 11:31 AM want2chase3 - 2017-06-14 2:24 PM Kinda long but the whole scenario needs to be known. About 4 months ago we let my husband's ex bring a horse to our house (for their daughter, pretty much) when she brought the horse, he was grossly underweight and injured.. not sure what happened to his leg but it was very swollen in the ankle. She said she had it x rayed but the vet said it needed that an mri done to see what was going on. She said her sister took the horse to get the mri done apparently they had a falling out and the mri results aren't available. Sounds fishy, but whatever.. she also said if we decided we couldn't keep him, she'd take him back no problem.. it didn't matter to her, I quote! I started feeding him up, worming , getting feet fixed, got a bunch of swelling out by poultice and cold hosing... step daughter was coming over daily to help clean stalls, water, feed, etc etc... then she started coming less and less frequently... she said it was costing her too much in gas to come over everyday. They live maybe 6 minutes from us, if that. The horse isn't sound... it's obvious where he's off..we decided we couldn't afford to take him for extensive x rays, mri whatnot... plus this ex refused to give us his papers... I actually had a friend who wanted him and would take him to the vet for whatever he needed and see if he could actually be fixed... ex refused to let the horse go unless this friend would pay $1000. My friend backed out... I don't blame her either! Then the ex told my husband we can't have papers but she'd sign something saying she wouldn't sell him if he stayed with us. So fast forward... for the last month or so, step daughter hasn't even looked at the horse or come over to see him or ride him, he's rideable but very light and walking only... all his care has fallen on me, plus he's gotten aggressive with my daughters good colt that we just got back, kicking, biting and jumping on him. I have 1 medium sized pasture and I have 3 stall barn. I have 3 other horses, that our OURS. I'm having to stall horses up to keep the peace because of this horse. So today, my husband made the call to the ex and said we are loading up the horse and bringing him back to you, we can't keep him here anymore. .. her answer was no... just put him down, she can't afford him anymore. Of course my step daughter is just hysterical... honestly we can't afford him as a pasture pet... every horse we have earns their keep... our pasture right now is good but it won't last much longer.. I don't even know what I've spent on getting him healthy again, minus the leg... my farrier says it's not fixable a few other people I respect say the same.. he's always going to be gimpy on it. I'm so angry right about the situation and her just saying put him down.. I'm trying not to lose my Jesus! This is gonna sound harsh, but if no one around you will take the horse as a grade pasture pet to maybe lead the kids around on. Then I'd haul him to a sale barn and sell him as grade to get a small part of your money back. But you know he's gonna more than likely end up on a meat truck.
I would never run one threw the kill sale to get back any amount of money, I would rather pay the money to have one put down the humane way, I lived in the Valley and have seen many kill trucks loaded down with horses going to Mexico to be killed, it was horrible just horrible to see... |
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I just read the headlines
Posts: 4483
        
| Southtxponygirl - 2017-06-15 12:17 PM
Girls_Gotta_Jet - 2017-06-15 11:31 AM want2chase3 - 2017-06-14 2:24 PM Kinda long but the whole scenario needs to be known. About 4 months ago we let my husband's ex bring a horse to our house (for their daughter, pretty much) when she brought the horse, he was grossly underweight and injured.. not sure what happened to his leg but it was very swollen in the ankle. She said she had it x rayed but the vet said it needed that an mri done to see what was going on. She said her sister took the horse to get the mri done apparently they had a falling out and the mri results aren't available. Sounds fishy, but whatever.. she also said if we decided we couldn't keep him, she'd take him back no problem.. it didn't matter to her, I quote! I started feeding him up, worming , getting feet fixed, got a bunch of swelling out by poultice and cold hosing... step daughter was coming over daily to help clean stalls, water, feed, etc etc... then she started coming less and less frequently... she said it was costing her too much in gas to come over everyday. They live maybe 6 minutes from us, if that. The horse isn't sound... it's obvious where he's off..we decided we couldn't afford to take him for extensive x rays, mri whatnot... plus this ex refused to give us his papers... I actually had a friend who wanted him and would take him to the vet for whatever he needed and see if he could actually be fixed... ex refused to let the horse go unless this friend would pay $1000. My friend backed out... I don't blame her either! Then the ex told my husband we can't have papers but she'd sign something saying she wouldn't sell him if he stayed with us. So fast forward... for the last month or so, step daughter hasn't even looked at the horse or come over to see him or ride him, he's rideable but very light and walking only... all his care has fallen on me, plus he's gotten aggressive with my daughters good colt that we just got back, kicking, biting and jumping on him. I have 1 medium sized pasture and I have 3 stall barn. I have 3 other horses, that our OURS. I'm having to stall horses up to keep the peace because of this horse. So today, my husband made the call to the ex and said we are loading up the horse and bringing him back to you, we can't keep him here anymore. .. her answer was no... just put him down, she can't afford him anymore. Of course my step daughter is just hysterical... honestly we can't afford him as a pasture pet... every horse we have earns their keep... our pasture right now is good but it won't last much longer.. I don't even know what I've spent on getting him healthy again, minus the leg... my farrier says it's not fixable a few other people I respect say the same.. he's always going to be gimpy on it. I'm so angry right about the situation and her just saying put him down.. I'm trying not to lose my Jesus! This is gonna sound harsh, but if no one around you will take the horse as a grade pasture pet to maybe lead the kids around on. Then I'd haul him to a sale barn and sell him as grade to get a small part of your money back. But you know he's gonna more than likely end up on a meat truck.
I would never run one threw the kill sale to get back any amount of money, I would rather pay the money to have one put down the humane way, I lived in the Valley and have seen many kill trucks loaded down with horses going to Mexico to be killed, it was horrible just horrible to see...
I totally agree, STPG. It is terrible. That little bit of money you'll get won't pay a summer month's electric bill down here. When the meat trucks were stopped here in the states, we did the horses no favors AT ALL.
Edited by GLP 2017-06-15 12:25 PM
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 Warrior Mom
Posts: 4400
     
| I won't run him thru a sale... it's been decided if she will sign him over to us, he's got a safe home with us. I don't even care about the papers anymore just want the bill of sale. |
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I just read the headlines
Posts: 4483
        
| want2chase3 - 2017-06-15 12:36 PM
I won't run him thru a sale... it's been decided if she will sign him over to us, he's got a safe home with us. I don't even care about the papers anymore just want the bill of sale.
I hope she will agree to that. Bless your heart for fighting so hard for him. |
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 A Somebody to Everybody
Posts: 41354
              Location: Under The Big Sky Of Texas | GLP - 2017-06-15 12:38 PM want2chase3 - 2017-06-15 12:36 PM I won't run him thru a sale... it's been decided if she will sign him over to us, he's got a safe home with us. I don't even care about the papers anymore just want the bill of sale. I hope she will agree to that. Bless your heart for fighting so hard for him.
Got my fingers crossed for you
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 Warrior Mom
Posts: 4400
     
| The offers been presented so I'm just waiting to hear. |
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 Expert
Posts: 3815
      Location: The best kept secret in TX | want2chase3 - 2017-06-15 1:47 PM The offers been presented so I'm just waiting to hear.
Keep us updated. |
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Expert
Posts: 1314
    Location: North Central Iowa Land of white frozen grass | The ex ownes the horse. Point blank. I would load the horse up and go over to her house and give her 2 choices. Sign a Bill Of Sale or leave the horse. Everyone in this drama needs to grow up and be adults. If this does not get resolved now it is only going to end up in litigation or divorce court. Even I can see this coming and my wife says that I am blind. |
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 Warrior Mom
Posts: 4400
     
| BS Hauler - 2017-06-15 6:30 PM
The ex ownes the horse. Point blank. I would load the horse up and go over to her house and give her 2 choices. Sign a Bill Of Sale or leave the horse. Everyone in this drama needs to grow up and be adults. If this does not get resolved now it is only going to end up in litigation or divorce court. Even I can see this coming and my wife says that I am blind.
I agree... shouldn't have gotten to this point. Playing a game right now.. haven't gotten a response from her regarding the bill of sale... if we don't hear anything by tomorrow I'll have him haul the horse to her house when he gets home. I'm trying to give this horse a chance. It's a sorry sad situation... for the horse mainly. .. from this point I'm staying out of it she won't speak to me anyway apparently. |
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Expert
Posts: 1314
    Location: North Central Iowa Land of white frozen grass | Take the horse in the trailer. All 4 of you need to be there together. Put the decision in the ex's hands with the daughter standing there |
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 Warrior Mom
Posts: 4400
     
| Just received the call... she's coming to get him tomorrow... I'm numb... |
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Go Get Em!
Posts: 13502
     Location: OH. IO | Im so sorry for what you are going thru.:( |
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 Warrior Mom
Posts: 4400
     
| jake16 - 2017-06-15 8:43 PM
Im so sorry for what you are going thru.:(
I feel like I failed the horse and my stepdaughter by pushing for ownership... had I kept my mouth shut she wouldn't be doing this. Sad... she'd rather have the horse dead than give over ownership... I'll get up early and give him a good meal before they come get him. |
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 Quarter Horse HIstorian
Posts: 2878
        Location: Aubrey, Texas | She would have held him over your head and made your life miserable every time she felt like it. Euthanasia translates to "good death." Sometimes that is all you can do- |
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Go Get Em!
Posts: 13502
     Location: OH. IO | I would be ripping hubby a new one for putting me in a situation like this.I would also note it down.Then when your stepdaughter wants to live with you,he can remember his vicious ex and what THEY did .uggghhhh.NO WAY SHOULD AN EX CONTROL THE OTHERS LIFE LIKE THIS.TELL HER YOU FOUND A BUYER. Are you SURE this horse has papers??buyer will pay 500.00 dollars.ONLY WITH PAPERS AND A BILL OF SALE. (Then I'll send ya 500 bucks)and you keep him.lol |
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 Warrior Mom
Posts: 4400
     
| I know... my hubby was just trying to make his daughter happy.. I get that... I can't fault him there. He's almost as bummed out as I am right now.. I could hear the disgust in his voice on the phone.. she claimed she "found" someone to take him... we offered to take him with a bill of sale! That's all. .. I know where he's going .. to a sale .. |
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Expert
Posts: 1314
    Location: North Central Iowa Land of white frozen grass | I have a feeling that the ex does not have papers on this horse to give. I kind of think that maybe the sister actually owns this horse and maybe the ex has not paid her for it. There is more to this than just giving a Bill of Sale or signing papers. |
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Go Get Em!
Posts: 13502
     Location: OH. IO | want2chase3 - 2017-06-15 10:10 PM
I know... my hubby was just trying to make his daughter happy.. I get that... I can't fault him there. He's almost as bummed out as I am right now.. I could hear the disgust in his voice on the phone.. she claimed she "found" someone to take him... we offered to take him with a bill of sale! That's all. .. I know where he's going .. to a sale ..
Can your hubby call her sister and get the real story??I kinda agree with BSHauler here too |
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 Warrior Mom
Posts: 4400
     
| BS Hauler - 2017-06-15 9:12 PM
I have a feeling that the ex does not have papers on this horse to give. I kind of think that maybe the sister actually owns this horse and maybe the ex has not paid her for it. There is more to this than just giving a Bill of Sale or signing papers.
You might be right... all I know is my husband bought this horse when they were still married .. in the divorce she took this horse with her.. she sold everything else except this horse... we offered to buy him while he was still sound and she wanted an outrageous amount of money for him... my husband refused because he'd already paid for the horse once. Don't blame him there... then he got hurt and starved so she brought him here... it really doesn't matter at this point.. she'd rather the horse be dead than give us ownership. Not much of anything I can do now.. |
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 Expert
Posts: 3815
      Location: The best kept secret in TX | want2chase3 - 2017-06-15 9:23 PM BS Hauler - 2017-06-15 9:12 PM I have a feeling that the ex does not have papers on this horse to give. I kind of think that maybe the sister actually owns this horse and maybe the ex has not paid her for it. There is more to this than just giving a Bill of Sale or signing papers. You might be right... all I know is my husband bought this horse when they were still married .. in the divorce she took this horse with her.. she sold everything else except this horse... we offered to buy him while he was still sound and she wanted an outrageous amount of money for him... my husband refused because he'd already paid for the horse once. Don't blame him there... then he got hurt and starved so she brought him here... it really doesn't matter at this point.. she'd rather the horse be dead than give us ownership. Not much of anything I can do now..
If the sale is close to you I would send a friend to buy him (because any one can pull a horse from a sale if they don't like the buyer) and bring him home. At a sale he won't be worth much. |
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 Warrior Mom
Posts: 4400
     
| IRunOnFaith - 2017-06-16 9:09 AM
want2chase3 - 2017-06-15 9:23 PM BS Hauler - 2017-06-15 9:12 PM I have a feeling that the ex does not have papers on this horse to give. I kind of think that maybe the sister actually owns this horse and maybe the ex has not paid her for it. There is more to this than just giving a Bill of Sale or signing papers. You might be right... all I know is my husband bought this horse when they were still married .. in the divorce she took this horse with her.. she sold everything else except this horse... we offered to buy him while he was still sound and she wanted an outrageous amount of money for him... my husband refused because he'd already paid for the horse once. Don't blame him there... then he got hurt and starved so she brought him here... it really doesn't matter at this point.. she'd rather the horse be dead than give us ownership. Not much of anything I can do now..
If the sale is close to you I would send a friend to buy him (because any one can pull a horse from a sale if they don't like the buyer) and bring him home. At a sale he won't be worth much.
I have no idea where the horse is going... |
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I just read the headlines
Posts: 4483
        
| You can call the local sale barns and ask if they have a such and such horse. Or if you know any cattle or horse buyers, you could ask them to pick him up for you.
Just wanted to add, our sale barn manager would buy animals for individuals when asked.
Edited by GLP 2017-06-16 9:39 AM
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 Warrior Mom
Posts: 4400
     
| GLP - 2017-06-16 9:37 AM
You can call the local sale barns and ask if they have a such and such horse. Or if you know any cattle or horse buyers, you could ask them to pick him up for you.
Just wanted to add, our sale barn manager would buy animals for individuals when asked.
I'm hoping to get a little more info from my stepdaughter when she comes over this afternoon. I really appreciate everyone's input here. |
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 Warrior Mom
Posts: 4400
     
| Some strange guy came and picked up the horse today and I saw that he had the papers given to him. My stepdaughter brought them in and they were sitting on my counter. They were outside loading horse. This was an act of pure spite. It's done and over with... I hope for the best for him. Moving on. |
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Go Get Em!
Posts: 13502
     Location: OH. IO | Im glad it's over for you.hope your step daughter is ok as well. |
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 My Heart Be Happy
Posts: 9159
      Location: Arkansas | GLP - 2017-06-15 11:26 AM
Yeah, I get the control part, but an animal's life and a little girl's heart are on the line. She sounds like a controlling, selfish person and I just can't understand those people.
This^^^
And I can't imagine hurting your own child on purpose (for heaven's sake) just to be a mean, spiteful individual. I continue to be amazed at people. . . You reap what you sow. . .
You were wonderful to at least try to help the horse and also not hurt the daughter.
Edited by Chandler's Mom 2017-06-17 11:06 PM
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Industrial Srength Barrel Racer
Posts: 7264
     
| Karma will get that witch someday. |
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