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 Elite Veteran
Posts: 898
  
Location: Idaho | So I sold my gelding last year, that I had raised and trained myself. Broke him, put 6 years of my blood sweat and tears into him, started and patterned him on barrels, and then decided to sell him just because I had a lot going on in my life. Moving to another state, getting married, grad school etc. I just didn't feel like I would have had the time to finish him. Well, it's been less than a year and the woman I sold him to, now has him for sale because she cannot afford her entire string which is heartbreaking for me because I wanted him to go to a good home not be passed around. The owner is a friend on FB, but she doesn't post a lot about him so it's not a constant reminder of me selling him. I've been told a few times just to delete her so I can forget about it and move forward.
Well now he is clocking Top of the 3D/bottom of 2D in tough competition, he still has more to give. I'm still busy, got grad school. Husband's going to be deploying soon, and then when he returns we are planning to try to start a family. Again, in my head it all makes sense and that I really won't have the time for a horse in my life but darnit, that is my baby and it's really hard just to see him be passed around. It's driving my nuts. We can buy him, but it's really not in the financial cards. We would have to do some serious budgeting, but then it wouldn't really be applicable considering our future goals!
I'm not a selfish person, I am usually very understanding of our finances and future goals, but right now I have that itch that I just cannot scratch. A part of me is really regretting selling him. I know I'm not the only one who has gone through this, and I really need some good, honest, straight forward advice. Say if I were to buy him, would I be able to balance out a horse, and a newborn, finishing school and then finding a job once school is done. And if I don't buy him, how do I just.. let it go? Any tips for that? If someone can just lay it out for me.. I'd be so appreciate because I feel like an emotional mess.
Edited by DashNDustem 2018-01-21 11:09 PM
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 Shelter Dog Lover
Posts: 10277
| I should not comment because I base my horse decisions on emotions so I would buy him back. If you are ok with not really having the time to put into him for a couple of years then get him. Has your life been easier, better without him despite the heartache of not owning him? I had one that I just could not sell, I cried everyday he was gone while they were trying him and I finally told then I could not let him go. He was not offered for sale but not being used, they offered 25K and I had no good reason to not sell him. We had the money though that 25k did not change our finances any. If you bought him back and the finances and time commitment were stressful you could sell him again.
Edited by rodeomom3 2018-01-22 6:49 AM
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 Tried and True
Posts: 21185
Location: Where I am happiest | buying him back would sure give you something to do while your husband is deployed. | |
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 Take a Picture
Posts: 12838
| ThreeCorners - 2018-01-22 7:20 AM
buying him back would sure give you something to do while your husband is deployed.
Agree | |
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 Firecracker Dog Lover
Posts: 3175
| DashNDustem - 2018-01-21 9:06 PM So I sold my gelding last year, that I had raised and trained myself. Broke him, put 6 years of my blood sweat and tears into him, started and patterned him on barrels, and then decided to sell him just because I had a lot going on in my life. Moving to another state, getting married, grad school etc. I just didn't feel like I would have had the time to finish him. Well, it's been less than a year and the woman I sold him to, now has him for sale because she cannot afford her entire string which is heartbreaking for me because I wanted him to go to a good home not be passed around. The owner is a friend on FB, but she doesn't post a lot about him so it's not a constant reminder of me selling him. I've been told a few times just to delete her so I can forget about it and move forward. Well now he is clocking Top of the 3D/bottom of 2D in tough competition, he still has more to give. I'm still busy, got grad school. Husband's going to be deploying soon, and then when he returns we are planning to try to start a family. Again, in my head it all makes sense and that I really won't have the time for a horse in my life but darnit, that is my baby and it's really hard just to see him be passed around. It's driving my nuts. We can buy him, but it's really not in the financial cards. We would have to do some serious budgeting, but then it wouldn't really be applicable considering our future goals! I'm not a selfish person, I am usually very understanding of our finances and future goals, but right now I have that itch that I just cannot scratch. A part of me is really regretting selling him. I know I'm not the only one who has gone through this, and I really need some good, honest, straight forward advice. Say if I were to buy him, would I be able to balance out a horse, and a newborn, finishing school and then finding a job once school is done. And if I don't buy him, how do I just.. let it go? Any tips for that? If someone can just lay it out for me.. I'd be so appreciate because I feel like an emotional mess.
PM me with more info - I have someone looking who would give him the home you are looking for. | |
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 Miss Laundry Misshap
Posts: 5271
| If it's your dream horse, there's nothing really wrong with letting them be a pasture ornament for some time!
Now, if you are wanting him to be 1D/2D, then you'll have to put forth time and effort, if you want that NOW. You said he's doing well. Do you want to continue that, or can he be 2D/3D until you have time to consistently ride and haul.
If time isn't an issue, buy him. You can make him a 1D horse in a year or 2 or you can commit to now. Just be prepared if you can't consistently work him. | |
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Elite Veteran
Posts: 898
Location: Idaho | Well, I can't say he is my 'dream' horse. I've always wanted a tall, bay, Streakin Six horse, and when I bought this horse I was actually going to look at a Streakin Six baby..but when we got there, the owners decided to not inform me that he had a big, swollen, oozing hole on his back right fetlock and he was not friendly.. would not come near me at all. I took a long drive to go get him, so they pointed us to the pasture where the other babies were for sale and this horse (he was 11 months at the time) was the smallest one, shoved his way through 5 other colts and stuck his nose right in my face. He so smart and calm, such a cuddle bug as a baby, plus my ex was with me at the time and this colt literally knocked him over with a swing of his butt whenever he came near me.. should have took the hint then!  so I had to take him home. But he is a shorter (15.2 now) bay, Shining Spark. Very smart, laid back, not very affectionate unless he is not feeling well, then he just wants to be loved on by mom.
As per time, I guess I 'don't' have a time limit, and I'm fine with a 2/3D horse. My old man that passed away in 2014 was a consistent 3/4D horse, then when he passed I started this one. So I would need to get more comfortable to hit those faster times which will take time and consistency.
I have extra time right now because I am focusing on school/internship and I am not working. Finding a part time job to work with my internship is soo hard out here for some reason, so I might wait till the summer and I'm out of school to find FT work.
My original goal after selling him was to wait and buy a finished horse and just ride..but it's been almost 8 months and now I'm just missing my horse. I know him, I know he hasn't been abused or have any behavioral problems. I know he doesn't have any holes in his training. I am so cautious about buying horses I don't know because I've been burned a few times and always have to 'fix' something. But also I don't want to buy him and have to sell him again either, but the potential is there especially with us wanting to start a family later.
Edited by DashNDustem 2018-01-22 1:07 PM
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Shelter Dog Lover
Posts: 10277
| DashNDustem - 2018-01-22 1:05 PM Well, I can't say he is my 'dream' horse. I've always wanted a tall, bay, Streakin Six horse, and when I bought this horse I was actually going to look at a Streakin Six baby..but when we got there, the owners decided to not inform me that he had a big, swollen, oozing hole on his back right fetlock and he was not friendly.. would not come near me at all. I took a long drive to go get him, so they pointed us to the pasture where the other babies were for sale and this horse (he was 11 months at the time ) was the smallest one, shoved his way through 5 other colts and stuck his nose right in my face. He so smart and calm, such a cuddle bug as a baby, plus my ex was with me at the time and this colt literally knocked him over with a swing of his butt whenever he came near me.. should have took the hint then! so I had to take him home. But he is a shorter (15.2 now ) bay, Shining Spark. Very smart, laid back, not very affectionate unless he is not feeling well, then he just wants to be loved on by mom. As per time, I guess I 'don't' have a time limit, and I'm fine with a 2/3D horse. My old man that passed away in 2014 was a consistent 3/4D horse, then when he passed I started this one. So I would need to get more comfortable to hit those faster times which will take time and consistency. I have extra time right now because I am focusing on school/internship and I am not working. Finding a part time job to work with my internship is soo hard out here for some reason, so I might wait till the summer and I'm out of school to find FT work. My original goal after selling him was to wait and buy a finished horse and just ride..but it's been almost 8 months and now I'm just missing my horse. I know him, I know he hasn't been abused or have any behavioral problems. I know he doesn't have any holes in his training. I am so cautious about buying horses I don't know because I've been burned a few times and always have to 'fix' something. But also I don't want to buy him and have to sell him again either, but the potential is there especially with us wanting to start a family later.
Buy him, you can horses and a baby. | |
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Miss Laundry Misshap
Posts: 5271
| DashNDustem - 2018-01-22 1:05 PM Well, I can't say he is my 'dream' horse. I've always wanted a tall, bay, Streakin Six horse, and when I bought this horse I was actually going to look at a Streakin Six baby..but when we got there, the owners decided to not inform me that he had a big, swollen, oozing hole on his back right fetlock and he was not friendly.. would not come near me at all. I took a long drive to go get him, so they pointed us to the pasture where the other babies were for sale and this horse (he was 11 months at the time ) was the smallest one, shoved his way through 5 other colts and stuck his nose right in my face. He so smart and calm, such a cuddle bug as a baby, plus my ex was with me at the time and this colt literally knocked him over with a swing of his butt whenever he came near me.. should have took the hint then! so I had to take him home. But he is a shorter (15.2 now ) bay, Shining Spark. Very smart, laid back, not very affectionate unless he is not feeling well, then he just wants to be loved on by mom. As per time, I guess I 'don't' have a time limit, and I'm fine with a 2/3D horse. My old man that passed away in 2014 was a consistent 3/4D horse, then when he passed I started this one. So I would need to get more comfortable to hit those faster times which will take time and consistency. I have extra time right now because I am focusing on school/internship and I am not working. Finding a part time job to work with my internship is soo hard out here for some reason, so I might wait till the summer and I'm out of school to find FT work. My original goal after selling him was to wait and buy a finished horse and just ride..but it's been almost 8 months and now I'm just missing my horse. I know him, I know he hasn't been abused or have any behavioral problems. I know he doesn't have any holes in his training. I am so cautious about buying horses I don't know because I've been burned a few times and always have to 'fix' something. But also I don't want to buy him and have to sell him again either, but the potential is there especially with us wanting to start a family later.
Based on that, buy him. You said it...You know him, you know what he is - and isn't!- and that's worth it's weight in gold. | |
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 Not Afraid to Work
Posts: 4717
| I would buy him back if you liked him and got along. You can always sell him later even if not desired outcome but there is a chance he will be bought and sold again by whoever buys him this round. I always say you only regret the chances you don't take and if you think you'll regret buying him then buy him.
I also believe you can balance a lot if you really want to. It isn't always easy and depends on what type of lifestyle you want. I have a good friend with a now 1 year old but she is a full-time nurse and still competes. Sounds like hes pretty steady eddy and just in the phase of perfecting and hauling which to me is the most fun.
If you don't buy him back, you can always unfollow her on fb vs delete her. | |
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 Hog Tie My Mojo
Posts: 4847
Location: Opelousas, LA | Nateracer - 2018-01-22 1:27 PM DashNDustem - 2018-01-22 1:05 PM Well, I can't say he is my 'dream' horse. I've always wanted a tall, bay, Streakin Six horse, and when I bought this horse I was actually going to look at a Streakin Six baby..but when we got there, the owners decided to not inform me that he had a big, swollen, oozing hole on his back right fetlock and he was not friendly.. would not come near me at all. I took a long drive to go get him, so they pointed us to the pasture where the other babies were for sale and this horse (he was 11 months at the time ) was the smallest one, shoved his way through 5 other colts and stuck his nose right in my face. He so smart and calm, such a cuddle bug as a baby, plus my ex was with me at the time and this colt literally knocked him over with a swing of his butt whenever he came near me.. should have took the hint then! so I had to take him home. But he is a shorter (15.2 now ) bay, Shining Spark. Very smart, laid back, not very affectionate unless he is not feeling well, then he just wants to be loved on by mom. As per time, I guess I 'don't' have a time limit, and I'm fine with a 2/3D horse. My old man that passed away in 2014 was a consistent 3/4D horse, then when he passed I started this one. So I would need to get more comfortable to hit those faster times which will take time and consistency. I have extra time right now because I am focusing on school/internship and I am not working. Finding a part time job to work with my internship is soo hard out here for some reason, so I might wait till the summer and I'm out of school to find FT work. My original goal after selling him was to wait and buy a finished horse and just ride..but it's been almost 8 months and now I'm just missing my horse. I know him, I know he hasn't been abused or have any behavioral problems. I know he doesn't have any holes in his training. I am so cautious about buying horses I don't know because I've been burned a few times and always have to 'fix' something. But also I don't want to buy him and have to sell him again either, but the potential is there especially with us wanting to start a family later.
Buy him, especially if you want to still ride after having a baby. Riding with small kids is challenging but it is much, much easier when you have a horse you know and trust. | |
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 No Tune in a Bucket
Posts: 2935
Location: Texas | Did you really expect any of us to tell you NOT to buy him? LOL
Buy him...you know we would. You really really want to.
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 My Heart Be Happy
Posts: 9159
Location: Arkansas | RocketPilot - 2018-01-22 10:07 PM
Did you really expect any of us to tell you NOT to buy him? LOL
Buy him...you know we would. You really really want to.
She needed us to have her back when she bought him and told her hubby 
We aren't much help on here if you were looking for the "forget about him" crowd!! I hope you get him back and he keeps you company while your husband is gone---and then when that future baby comes, he'll be the perfect kid's horse to repay you for having faith in him.
(Thank your husband for his service, and thank you for your sacrifice also.) | |
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| Chandler's Mom - 2018-01-22 8:19 PM
RocketPilot - 2018-01-22 10:07 PM
Did you really expect any of us to tell you NOT to buy him? LOL
Buy him...you know we would. You really really want to.
She needed us to have her back when she bought him and told her hubby
We aren't much help on here if you were looking for the "forget about him" crowd!! I hope you get him back and he keeps you company while your husband is gone---and then when that future baby comes, he'll be the perfect kid's horse to repay you for having faith in him.
(Thank your husband for his service, and thank you for your sacrifice also. )
AMEN to all of this!  | |
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 Elite Veteran
Posts: 912
Location: Alabama | What are you waiting on? Buy the horse! You won't regret it.  | |
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No Tune in a Bucket
Posts: 2935
Location: Texas | So, did you buy him yet? | |
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| DashNDustem - 2018-01-21 11:06 PM
So I sold my gelding last year, that I had raised and trained myself. Broke him, put 6 years of my blood sweat and tears into him, started and patterned him on barrels, and then decided to sell him just because I had a lot going on in my life. Moving to another state, getting married, grad school etc. I just didn't feel like I would have had the time to finish him. Well, it's been less than a year and the woman I sold him to, now has him for sale because she cannot afford her entire string which is heartbreaking for me because I wanted him to go to a good home not be passed around. The owner is a friend on FB, but she doesn't post a lot about him so it's not a constant reminder of me selling him. I've been told a few times just to delete her so I can forget about it and move forward.
Well now he is clocking Top of the 3D/bottom of 2D in tough competition, he still has more to give. I'm still busy, got grad school. Husband's going to be deploying soon, and then when he returns we are planning to try to start a family. Again, in my head it all makes sense and that I really won't have the time for a horse in my life but darnit, that is my baby and it's really hard just to see him be passed around. It's driving my nuts. We can buy him, but it's really not in the financial cards. We would have to do some serious budgeting, but then it wouldn't really be applicable considering our future goals!
I'm not a selfish person, I am usually very understanding of our finances and future goals, but right now I have that itch that I just cannot scratch. A part of me is really regretting selling him. I know I'm not the only one who has gone through this, and I really need some good, honest, straight forward advice. Say if I were to buy him, would I be able to balance out a horse, and a newborn, finishing school and then finding a job once school is done. And if I don't buy him, how do I just.. let it go? Any tips for that? If someone can just lay it out for me.. I'd be so appreciate because I feel like an emotional mess.
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Talk wit the lady and ask if she minds you helping to sell her horse to find
another good home like he has now ...
Have the lady msg her contact info including city/state and additional info
or an ad she may have going. Insist on knowing the price and being able
to share it with potential buyers. If price is listed and you get calls/msg's
you know it is in their price range minus most tire kickers.
I for one ... as a buyer ... will not waste my time if price is not listed!!
Know your limits on negotiating a sale ... get contact data from buyer AND
give buyer sellers contact info ....
NOTIFY THE SELLER .. AND STEPASIDE!!
Concentrate on your life plans with no added stress or financial qualms..
your husband comes first and does need any distractions back at home!!
GOOD LUCK ..
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 I hate cooking and cleaning
Posts: 3310
Location: Jersey Girl | Buy him back. Life is too short for reqrets. | |
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Miss Laundry Misshap
Posts: 5271
| ronaldmill - 2018-01-24 1:26 AM i also want to use gelding so please share your experience about gelding. Thanks :-)
Um...Troll?? | |
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 Certified Snake Wrangler
Posts: 1672
Location: North MS | Buy him! I had to buy one back last week when I saw him on FB with bail being raised by a rescue because he was at a sale barn. None of his information went with him. Within 30 minutes I was in my truck heading to the sale and had given the rescue free rein to get him even if a private buyer was after him vs a kill buyer. I had already contacted his previous mom before I left and she wanted him back. He went to a little britches family when I sold him 6 months ago. Don't take a chance if you have the opportunity and means. If you decide to sell later, then YOU have control of the home he gets (and a contract if you feel like it). I had my heart ripped out last week. | |
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Red Hot Cardinal Fan
Posts: 4122
| I'll be the odd man out and say don't buy him. From what you've said, he's not your dream horse and it sounds like you want him back more for emotional reasons. You are going to be extremely busy even with your husband being deployed, even moreso once he is back. And as someone who is trying to pay off debt and get in a better financial place myself, I wouldn't be willing to put myself in a financial crunch now to get him plus putting future goals in a hard to reach place.
Just my 2 cents and best of luck in whatever you decide to do! | |
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 Namesless in BHW
Posts: 10368
Location: At the race track with Ah Dee Ohs | Nateracer - 2018-01-24 8:47 AM ronaldmill - 2018-01-24 1:26 AM i also want to use gelding so please share your experience about gelding. Thanks :-) Um...Troll??
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 pressure dripper
Posts: 8696
Location: the end of the rainbow | write down your pro & con list. Ask your husband to write down his own pro & con list without seeing yours. Then the 2 of you can sit down, go over each other's lists and come to a decision. Honestly it sounds to me like you don't really want to buy the horse but feel like you should because you love him. Talk to hubby and make sure it's actually something that you both want to do before you pull out the check book. | |
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My Heart Be Happy
Posts: 9159
Location: Arkansas | Bought yet????? | |
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Elite Veteran
Posts: 898
Location: Idaho | I would like to thank you all for your insight and advice! We have not purchased him because even though I am emotionally invested in him and I want him back, I sat down with my husband and our finances aren't in the place to go spend a large chunk of a change on a horse. Not to mention how much it will cost to ship him, find a boarding facility, pay board, feed, and all that comes with it. Could we crunch it and risk it? Yes, but it's just not the smart thing to do..especially with the recent possibility of a government shut down! Also I don't want to risk having to sell him again, it would defeat the purpose of buying him back. Having a family is more on the priority list as well, as I am not getting any younger and I'm creeping up on my mid thirties with no children.
Perhaps in the future when I am more financially stable I will seek him out and bring him home. But unfortunately, it's just not going to happen right now. He is a good boy and I sure hope he finds his way to a new, good and permanent home. Thank you all again for your input, it really put things into perspective.
Edited by DashNDustem 2018-01-27 4:40 PM
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| DashNDustem - 2018-01-27 2:37 PM
I would like to thank you all for your insight and advice! We have not purchased him because even though I am emotionally invested in him and I want him back, I sat down with my husband and our finances aren't in the place to go spend a large chunk of a change on a horse. Not to mention how much it will cost to ship him, find a boarding facility, pay board, feed, and all that comes with it. Could we crunch it and risk it? Yes, but it's just not the smart thing to do..especially with the recent possibility of a government shut down! Also I don't want to risk having to sell him again, it would defeat the purpose of buying him back. Having a family is more on the priority list as well, as I am not getting any younger and I'm creeping up on my mid thirties with no children.
Perhaps in the future when I am more financially stable I will seek him out and bring him home. But unfortunately, it's just not going to happen right now. He is a good boy and I sure hope he finds his way to a new, good and permanent home. Thank you all again for your input, it really put things into perspective.
I want to commend you for sitting down and having that conversation with your husband, it takes a lot to put your emotional attachment to the side and think about what is best for you and your family in the long run. The perfect horse will come along with the timing is right for you and your family. | |
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On the fence, need some advice.