chasendacash - 2018-05-01 11:58 PM

My brother had a boating accident last Wednesday on Lake Sam Rayburn and severed his right arm about 5 inches below his shoulder.  He collided with a couple of floating logs and was thrown to the floor of the boat.  In this, the windshield caught his arm and ripped it off.  He had his second surgery today will possibly be sent home tomorrow.  He is handling the loss of the arm quite well right now but he has a long road ahead of him.  He's 61, a welder, mechanic, fishing guide, and a royal pain in the ass.  But he's MY pita!  He miraculously survived in several different aspects of the wreck ----- he was thrown INTO the boat instead of the lake; he layed the floor of his boat for over an hour with his arm completely severed before Rescue reached him yet didn't bleed to death then it was an hour of combined tansport (boat, ambulance, helicopter); he always wears a lifejacket and that kept his phone from flying out into the lake.  It landed in the boat, landing on his severed arm.  It was uncommonly windy and cold that night and it slowed his blood flow enough to keep him alive.  He was able to keep poking his phone until a call went through and a local friend answered.

?Now I need prayers also as I have NEVER considered myself a caretaker and he doesn't think he needs one.  Ever.  His only other relative is our 85yo father.  Dad and wife are here also but Dad has his hands full with wife, besides just being 85yo.  I don't have any idea about what needs to be done 'next'.  I am about to get an education in MedData, disability, social security, Medicaid...  
 

chasendacash - 2018-05-03 9:42 PM Thank you everyone!  This is the first chance I've had to open my computer back up.  He did go home last night.  The last 24 hours have been the worst so far.  I'm hoping this is just 'adjustment' from not being in the hospital.  K thinks since he is home, he is well.  His pain is tolerable but his attitude is not.  K and I have never backed off from a good fight and we are making up for lost time.   He got up and tried to 'go' outside at about 12:30 last night and before Dad or I could get there (Dad had dozed off in the chair right next to him and I had walked into the next room), he fell.  As in soiled his pants, twisting, turning, busted his a-- fall.   It took about 30 minutes before we could move him from the floor.  Serious sibling talk about help needed.  About 2:30am he actually told us he had to go and Dad and I helped him to the bathroom.  As K and Dad were coming out, they both fell, busted Dad's head, several knuckles, and probably sprained his wrist (85yo).  I get K cleaned up (he was too late, soiled pants) and back to the couch, get Dad cleaned up and back to the chair, and then set the alarm on my phone to ask K every hour after that if he needs to go.  At 11:30, I'm eating a sandwich at table and hear crash.  K had gotten up again without help.  He's taken a fourth of the pain pills during this time so I keep waiting for him to sober up.  K greatly resents being told to follow the rules.  Always has and has made his life much more difficult than it needed to be.  It's like trying to talk to a 2yo that smokes 3 packs a day and cusses me out when he gets furious with me.  Pray for him to regain his common sense.  Pray for Dad to not overdo it.  Pray for me to remember my fear of prison so that I don't kill him.  



?Again, thank you all for your prayers and concern.  They are comforting to read.

chasendacash - 2018-05-03 9:42 PM

Thank you everyone!  This is the first chance I've had to open my computer back up.  He did go home last night.  The last 24 hours have been the worst so far.  I'm hoping this is just 'adjustment' from not being in the hospital.  K thinks since he is home, he is well.  His pain is tolerable but his attitude is not.  K and I have never backed off from a good fight and we are making up for lost time.   He got up and tried to 'go' outside at about 12:30 last night and before Dad or I could get there (Dad had dozed off in the chair right next to him and I had walked into the next room), he fell.  As in soiled his pants, twisting, turning, busted his a-- fall.   It took about 30 minutes before we could move him from the floor.  Serious sibling talk about help needed.  About 2:30am he actually told us he had to go and Dad and I helped him to the bathroom.  As K and Dad were coming out, they both fell, busted Dad's head, several knuckles, and probably sprained his wrist (85yo).  I get K cleaned up (he was too late, soiled pants) and back to the couch, get Dad cleaned up and back to the chair, and then set the alarm on my phone to ask K every hour after that if he needs to go.  At 11:30, I'm eating a sandwich at table and hear crash.  K had gotten up again without help.  He's taken a fourth of the pain pills during this time so I keep waiting for him to sober up.  K greatly resents being told to follow the rules.  Always has and has made his life much more difficult than it needed to be.  It's like trying to talk to a 2yo that smokes 3 packs a day and cusses me out when he gets furious with me.  Pray for him to regain his common sense.  Pray for Dad to not overdo it.  Pray for me to remember my fear of prison so that I don't kill him.  

?Again, thank you all for your prayers and concern.  They are comforting to read.

chasendacash - 2018-05-04 12:22 AM

 ?No, there isn't any other family.  Distant cousins but none we are really close to, geographically or otherwise.  No current girlfriend, wife or children.  There are a lot of friends here at the lake and several have visited but honestly, these are mostly old fishing guys and they just don't do this sort of thing.  I don't know if anyone would stand up to him like I do.  I banned smoking in the house after he lit the wrong end and had a torch going yet didn't even realize it.  Heck, I've never been in this position before and haven't done any 'offering' to others before this.  That will change when this ordeal is over!  My husband and I are going to switch places soon (he's taking care of horses and daughter came home from her dad's today so now her too). 

?Absolutely right my dad doesn't need this!  That was the main topic of several of the fights this week!  K just closed his eyes.  Again, Dad is dozing in the chair but he 'naps' in his chair every evening.  I'm jumping off to go lay down, setting my phone alarm of course!  The last three hours have been pretty pleasant.  I was able to show him how to find his recorded PBR on his new TV/Dish setup and he kind of likes me again.  :)

chasendacash - 2018-05-06 12:08 AM

?Today was the best yet.  I had told everyone that today was Derby day and I'd be having the TV on that stuff from noon to 6:30.  The western channel, recorded PBR, and fishing shows would have to wait!  LOL!  So in order to make it more interesting, I googled Kentucky Derby games and we had a horse auction with Monopoly money.  In between this game and some visitors from the neighborhood, the afternoon passed fairly quickly.  He got up only once during the wee hours of the morning without 'notice' but I woke up before he did anything really stupid.  He was hurting more than usual during the night and I think was restless.  He and Dad walked to the mailbox today, two driveways over.  He's a little, wiry dude - 5'7ish, 130#, extremely active - so he's already planning on walking more of the neighborhood tomorrow.  He is moving better and better around the house and porch so we aren't LEAPING to our feet and escorting him every move.  This is a lake subdivision so several weekenders stopped by to visit today.  He enjoys company but not constant live-ins (us, LOL). 

?I laughed at one point this evening....  the TV is BLARING the western channel because they are all deaf.  K is talking about me fixing his computer.  B thinks K is talking about chocolate cake and is asking how big of a piece does he want?  Dad says he didn't buy cookies and cream ice cream, I did (I didn't, he did), and promptly dozes off in the dining table chair.  This was all at the same time.  This chair is in the living room because K has a couch (where he sits/lays/sleeps) and one chair (where B sits).  (I brought in a folding chair that I had in the back of my car.)  And the stories being told are on repeat.....  

?They have all fallen asleep.  Now I can turn down the TV (not off, wakes him up), turn out most of the lights (not off, dark wakes him up) and go lay down.   Prayers work!  My stress level is normal for the situation and not bordering on criminal anymore.  :)

chasendacash - 2018-05-22 1:07 AM

 Thanks and keep the prayers coming, we have survived the first 24 hours back together!  And alone together at that!  :)  He's been on good behavior and I've continued to pray for cooperative co-existence.  I spent most of today talking or emailing Social Security and state benefit agencies.  Also organizing the medical bills he's gotten.  So far it's up to $125k.  Grrr.... he gets $783, $30 too much, from a pension so he's disqualified for SSI.  His disability determination is going another round and they set up a phone meeting for June 18th.  It doesn't look promising so now I'm thinking since the loss of an arm doesn't qualify him maybe he should file on his deterioration of eye sight.  He had to retire from welding about 4 years ago because he couldn't see the welds under the hood anymore.  Does anyone have any tips on disability requests?  It's frustrating because I've been passed around to four different people and no one shows record that I've filed for this already.  Each one is calling to 'open' his case.  Rinse and repeat. 
This stay with him is being cut short.  After I get him home from dr appt tomorrow, I will leave here and go to Arkansas for a funeral Wednesday a.m.  A beloved cousin passed away this weekend.  She had Downs Syndrome and was 62 years old.  She had a great life but the last few years were not good at all.  It is truly merciful that she has regained her spirit and is with her Lord.