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Encouragement Vs. False hope
RoaniePonie11
Reg. Jan 2011
Posted 2019-10-27 1:13 PM
Subject: Encouragement Vs. False hope


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Encouragement vs False Hope: There is a big difference is encouraging someone to reach for the stars, and telling them to go for it knowing they don't have the resources, knowledge or experience. The key word here is knowing. If you don't KNOW that person doesn't have what it takes, don't tell them so. Perfect example: Me in college. When I applied to the nursing program the director ask me if I was working and I said yes, 40 hours per week and she said "Oh.... well you wont pass working those kinds of hours. You will have to quit your job. I'll be surprised if you make high enough scores to get in." Well thank you for shooting me down ma'am. I am coming up on my second year of nursing school working 30h per week with a GPA of 3.8. Stop telling people they can't. Instead tell them its a lot of work but with the right support, knowledge and a whole lotta determination- they could! 

My biggest pet peve is telling someone not to try something either 1. you failed at 2. you are currently doing or 3. you are too afraid to try yourself. 

I can level with giving someone a reality check about what accomplishing a dream is going to take, like hey, this is going to be massively expensive. You will have sleepless nights and I hope you like mac n cheese, but if this is something you truly want to do, heres what I know about it: 

I'm tired of seeing posts asking about running/ raising certain types of horses (futurity, stallions, race horses, breeding etc) and people just getting plain shot down by people that are actually doing it themselves! I get that you want to share the wisdom of how hard it is, but if it's not worth it why are you doing it? And what makes you think you can and i can't? 

 

Just something that has been weighing on me lately. 

 

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BS Hauler
Reg. Jan 2012
Posted 2019-10-27 1:24 PM
Subject: RE: Encouragement Vs. False hope


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My daughter was told by the school conselaur that she wouldn't make it thru college and she was just going to probly get married and have kids.  This was because she wasn't one of the teachers kids or business kids from town.

Well today she is with a big insurance company making 6 figures. She can't wait to come back someday and throw that in his face.

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RoaniePonie11
Reg. Jan 2011
Posted 2019-10-27 1:26 PM
Subject: RE: Encouragement Vs. False hope


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Good for her!! Heck Yes! 

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lonely va barrelxr
Reg. Apr 2005
Posted 2019-10-28 5:22 AM
Subject: RE: Encouragement Vs. False hope



Reaching for the stars....


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I started a new venture this year designing and enhancing barrel racing shirts and hats. So I go to my first show as a vendor and a gal who has been a vendor for a couple decades comes over and starts telling me how not worth it it is to be a vendor, how no one buys anything anymore at the shows, how my stuff is too expensive (it is, but there is a market for top end, I just have to get the shirts out there) and that I might as well pack up and go home. Very nice to hear all that at my first vendor show! Don't know for sure where all that came from since this person has barely spoken 2 words to me in 2 decades. 

I did my homework before starting this. I don't even WANT it to get too big too fast since I work full time and then do the horses. I set up a really good spreadsheet for pricing out the shirts with some flexibility to offer 10% discount for cash vs card sale. I have no visions of grandeur - *I* can't even afford my own shirts so I don't expect everyone to be able to. But there will be those that can afford, and do appreciate the quality, creativity and custom-ness of my shirts and will buy. One gal and her daughter didn't even flinch at the prices - but the daughter kept having to tell her mom that blue wasn't her color when they were looking at one of the more expensive shirts. 

But for another vendor to come up to me within minutes of being set up and give me this doom and gloom was completely inappropriate. 

 

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RoaniePonie11
Reg. Jan 2011
Posted 2019-10-28 7:59 AM
Subject: RE: Encouragement Vs. False hope


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Isn't that super nice.... I hate when people currently in the business discourage others. You want to look at her and go, if its so bad why are you here?? 

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Turnburnsis
Reg. Nov 2004
Posted 2019-10-28 8:06 AM
Subject: RE: Encouragement Vs. False hope


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lonely va barrelxr - 2019-10-28 5:22 AM


I started a new venture this year designing and enhancing barrel racing shirts and hats. So I go to my first show as a vendor and a gal who has been a vendor for a couple decades comes over and starts telling me how not worth it it is to be a vendor, how no one buys anything anymore at the shows, how my stuff is too expensive (it is, but there is a market for top end, I just have to get the shirts out there) and that I might as well pack up and go home. Very nice to hear all that at my first vendor show! Don't know for sure where all that came from since this person has barely spoken 2 words to me in 2 decades. 


I did my homework before starting this. I don't even WANT it to get too big too fast since I work full time and then do the horses. I set up a really good spreadsheet for pricing out the shirts with some flexibility to offer 10% discount for cash vs card sale. I have no visions of grandeur - *I* can't even afford my own shirts so I don't expect everyone to be able to. But there will be those that can afford, and do appreciate the quality, creativity and custom-ness of my shirts and will buy. One gal and her daughter didn't even flinch at the prices - but the daughter kept having to tell her mom that blue wasn't her color when they were looking at one of the more expensive shirts. 


But for another vendor to come up to me within minutes of being set up and give me this doom and gloom was completely inappropriate. 


 


It is amazing how people tear people up for their own gain or entertainment! I just witness it the last 2 days!  I am astonished guess I hear bout it but to witness it is crazy!  i tried to stay out of it but so hard and I did end up putting my 2 cents in but man oh man I shouldnt be surprised! 

Anyways are you the one that does the delious sugar cookies every year?! So I am very positive that you shirt work is just as amazing!  Please post some pics of your shirts!  I would love to see!

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want2chase3
Reg. May 2009
Posted 2019-10-28 8:54 AM
Subject: RE: Encouragement Vs. False hope



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I agree. There is so much negativity in this world, I believe,  more now than ever before. I hear it daily. What ever happened to being encouraging to others, lifting each other up? People are so self centered and honestly I think they enjoy watching others fail. It's even trickled down to kids too. I'll share.... Jacob made it onto a very predominant select baseball team this fall, he beat out 30 boys to get a spot on the team at tryouts.. We were beyond elated for him. His "friends" and former teammates have been absolutely terrible to him at school ever since. They use to play on the same team and had been playing together for over 4 years!. We had to step in and tell their parents how awful their kids were being to him, it was affecting his attitude and school, he just didnt want to go because they will pick at him constantly, telling him his team sucks and they are a disgrace and the only reason he won that last tournament was because they played sissy teams... which is far from the truth! I've spent hours telling Jacob to ignore them just smile at them and let your playing do your talking, they are just jealous, etc etc...  I believe all that is a learned behavior I believe they hear their parents talking negative and so forth. It's a such shame. I told Jacob as hard as it is, when you come in from a weekend of winning a tournament, you keep your mouth shut, we dont brag on a win, be proud but  STAY HUMBLE always. And when those boys and their team win, you WILL congratulate them. Even if you dont feel like it. I will not allow him to lower himself. We hold him to a very high standard when it comes to sportsmanship and attitude! 

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Turnburnsis
Reg. Nov 2004
Posted 2019-10-28 9:00 AM
Subject: RE: Encouragement Vs. False hope


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I also witness the gloating too.  How can someone think it is funny when someone is in a pickle or jam!!! But yup witness that too!!! and laugh at them to their face!  It makes me hope that they have a bad time and I can laugh in their face and say hey remember when? But I wont I will probably help if I can uggg

 

I cant stand for someone to go thru a terrible time even if their fault!



Edited by Turnburnsis 2019-10-28 9:02 AM
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lonely va barrelxr
Reg. Apr 2005
Posted 2019-10-28 11:32 AM
Subject: RE: Encouragement Vs. False hope



Reaching for the stars....


Posts: 12708
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Turnburnsis - 2019-10-28 9:06 AM


lonely va barrelxr - 2019-10-28 5:22 AM


I started a new venture this year designing and enhancing barrel racing shirts and hats. So I go to my first show as a vendor and a gal who has been a vendor for a couple decades comes over and starts telling me how not worth it it is to be a vendor, how no one buys anything anymore at the shows, how my stuff is too expensive (it is, but there is a market for top end, I just have to get the shirts out there) and that I might as well pack up and go home. Very nice to hear all that at my first vendor show! Don't know for sure where all that came from since this person has barely spoken 2 words to me in 2 decades. 


I did my homework before starting this. I don't even WANT it to get too big too fast since I work full time and then do the horses. I set up a really good spreadsheet for pricing out the shirts with some flexibility to offer 10% discount for cash vs card sale. I have no visions of grandeur - *I* can't even afford my own shirts so I don't expect everyone to be able to. But there will be those that can afford, and do appreciate the quality, creativity and custom-ness of my shirts and will buy. One gal and her daughter didn't even flinch at the prices - but the daughter kept having to tell her mom that blue wasn't her color when they were looking at one of the more expensive shirts. 


But for another vendor to come up to me within minutes of being set up and give me this doom and gloom was completely inappropriate. 


 



It is amazing how people tear people up for their own gain or entertainment! I just witness it the last 2 days!  I am astonished guess I hear bout it but to witness it is crazy!  i tried to stay out of it but so hard and I did end up putting my 2 cents in but man oh man I shouldnt be surprised! 


Anyways are you the one that does the delious sugar cookies every year?! So I am very positive that you shirt work is just as amazing!  Please post some pics of your shirts!  I would love to see!


 

 

That would be me. Yes, the shirts started last January after cookie season. I was a little bored so decided to deck out a couple of my shirts. They turned out spectacular and so I decided why not do for others too?!

I would post pics but two things: one, I will become an advertiser before posting something for sale, and two, pics do crystal work NO justice! I did hire a professional to do photos and videos of my first 10 shirts and at least in the videos you can see there are crystals on the shirts and hats. I do have a FB page for them with the pics and videos. I'll gladly share that to anyone who wants to message for it. Again, I don't want to post without paying as an advertiser, and I'm not ready for that just yet.

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Chandler's Mom
Reg. Jan 2015
Posted 2019-10-28 6:27 PM
Subject: RE: Encouragement Vs. False hope



My Heart Be Happy


Posts: 9159
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Location: Arkansas

want2chase3 - 2019-10-28 8:54 AM


I agree. There is so much negativity in this world, I believe,  more now than ever before. I hear it daily. What ever happened to being encouraging to others, lifting each other up? People are so self centered and honestly I think they enjoy watching others fail. It's even trickled down to kids too. I'll share.... Jacob made it onto a very predominant select baseball team this fall, he beat out 30 boys to get a spot on the team at tryouts.. We were beyond elated for him. His "friends" and former teammates have been absolutely terrible to him at school ever since. They use to play on the same team and had been playing together for over 4 years!. We had to step in and tell their parents how awful their kids were being to him, it was affecting his attitude and school, he just didnt want to go because they will pick at him constantly, telling him his team sucks and they are a disgrace and the only reason he won that last tournament was because they played sissy teams... which is far from the truth! I've spent hours telling Jacob to ignore them just smile at them and let your playing do your talking, they are just jealous, etc etc...  I believe all that is a learned behavior I believe they hear their parents talking negative and so forth. It's a such shame. I told Jacob as hard as it is, when you come in from a weekend of winning a tournament, you keep your mouth shut, we dont brag on a win, be proud but  STAY HUMBLE always. And when those boys and their team win, you WILL congratulate them. Even if you dont feel like it. I will not allow him to lower himself. We hold him to a very high standard when it comes to sportsmanship and attitude! 


Unbelievable. . . And I totally agree that it's coming from Momma and Daddy at home.  I truthfully think you reap what you sow, and one day all this will come home to roost.  Tell Jacob to keep his head up and keep being classy.  Like you said, his playing will speak for itself. Hugs to him!!!

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Chandler's Mom
Reg. Jan 2015
Posted 2019-10-28 6:30 PM
Subject: RE: Encouragement Vs. False hope



My Heart Be Happy


Posts: 9159
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Location: Arkansas

lonely va barrelxr - 2019-10-28 11:32 AM


Turnburnsis - 2019-10-28 9:06 AM


lonely va barrelxr - 2019-10-28 5:22 AM


I started a new venture this year designing and enhancing barrel racing shirts and hats. So I go to my first show as a vendor and a gal who has been a vendor for a couple decades comes over and starts telling me how not worth it it is to be a vendor, how no one buys anything anymore at the shows, how my stuff is too expensive (it is, but there is a market for top end, I just have to get the shirts out there) and that I might as well pack up and go home. Very nice to hear all that at my first vendor show! Don't know for sure where all that came from since this person has barely spoken 2 words to me in 2 decades. 


I did my homework before starting this. I don't even WANT it to get too big too fast since I work full time and then do the horses. I set up a really good spreadsheet for pricing out the shirts with some flexibility to offer 10% discount for cash vs card sale. I have no visions of grandeur - *I* can't even afford my own shirts so I don't expect everyone to be able to. But there will be those that can afford, and do appreciate the quality, creativity and custom-ness of my shirts and will buy. One gal and her daughter didn't even flinch at the prices - but the daughter kept having to tell her mom that blue wasn't her color when they were looking at one of the more expensive shirts. 


But for another vendor to come up to me within minutes of being set up and give me this doom and gloom was completely inappropriate. 


 



It is amazing how people tear people up for their own gain or entertainment! I just witness it the last 2 days!  I am astonished guess I hear bout it but to witness it is crazy!  i tried to stay out of it but so hard and I did end up putting my 2 cents in but man oh man I shouldnt be surprised! 


Anyways are you the one that does the delious sugar cookies every year?! So I am very positive that you shirt work is just as amazing!  Please post some pics of your shirts!  I would love to see!



 


 


That would be me. Yes, the shirts started last January after cookie season. I was a little bored so decided to deck out a couple of my shirts. They turned out spectacular and so I decided why not do for others too?!


I would post pics but two things: one, I will become an advertiser before posting something for sale, and two, pics do crystal work NO justice! I did hire a professional to do photos and videos of my first 10 shirts and at least in the videos you can see there are crystals on the shirts and hats. I do have a FB page for them with the pics and videos. I'll gladly share that to anyone who wants to message for it. Again, I don't want to post without paying as an advertiser, and I'm not ready for that just yet.


I don't FB, but I SO want to see your work!! 

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lonely va barrelxr
Reg. Apr 2005
Posted 2019-10-28 8:42 PM
Subject: RE: Encouragement Vs. False hope



Reaching for the stars....


Posts: 12708
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https://www.facebook.com/609709622880328/videos/2969237069817540/

 

Don't know if it will show up for you CM -- the format for these files isn't easy to work with! Took me weeks to figure out how to get them onto FB.  



Edited by lonely va barrelxr 2019-10-28 8:52 PM
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Southtxponygirl
Reg. Nov 2006
Posted 2019-10-28 8:55 PM
Subject: RE: Encouragement Vs. False hope



A Somebody to Everybody


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Location: Under The Big Sky Of Texas

lonely va barrelxr - 2019-10-28 8:42 PM


https://www.facebook.com/609709622880328/videos/2969237069817540/


 


Don't know if it will show up for you CM -- the format for these files isn't easy to work with! Took me weeks to figure out how to get them onto FB.  


Awww, SUPER CUTE

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Chandler's Mom
Reg. Jan 2015
Posted 2019-10-28 9:09 PM
Subject: RE: Encouragement Vs. False hope



My Heart Be Happy


Posts: 9159
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Location: Arkansas

lonely va barrelxr - 2019-10-28 8:42 PM


https://www.facebook.com/609709622880328/videos/2969237069817540/


 


Don't know if it will show up for you CM -- the format for these files isn't easy to work with! Took me weeks to figure out how to get them onto FB.  


You did good!!!!   Lula Bell is on FB, so I may have to get with her and look more thoroughly at your creations!   I'm very impressed 

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GLP
Reg. Oct 2013
Posted 2019-10-28 10:21 PM
Subject: RE: Encouragement Vs. False hope


I just read the headlines


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lonely va barrelxr - 2019-10-28 8:42 PM


https://www.facebook.com/609709622880328/videos/2969237069817540/


 


Don't know if it will show up for you CM -- the format for these files isn't easy to work with! Took me weeks to figure out how to get them onto FB.  


Your work is BEAUTIFUL!!

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Turnburnsis
Reg. Nov 2004
Posted 2019-10-29 7:44 AM
Subject: RE: Encouragement Vs. False hope


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Thank you for posting pic!  Love love them!  No wonder she wanted you to leave!!!!

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casualdust07
Reg. Mar 2005
Posted 2019-10-30 3:50 PM
Subject: RE: Encouragement Vs. False hope



You get what you give


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People told  me tons of stuff about vet school

 

- most people don't get accepted, especially with junior college credits 

- you wont be able to ride much less compete if you get accepted into vet school

- if you want to be a horse vet you will have to give up your horses

- if you want to ride and compete you have to do small animal medicine

- working on horses will make you resent your own horses and you wont even want them anymore

- you will never have time to ride

I got accepted my first try, never waivered on wanting to work on horses, competed all four years of vet school, only had to slow down the last year of clinicals. found a job where all the doctors have horses and ride, i get two weeks paid vacation, we work together on call so we can for the most part go where we want to go... I absolutely would have been MISERABLE doing small animal medicine. I would have hated my job and hated it when i couldnt ride. I love working on horses and even though some days i get called in and cant ride, i dont resent my job over it. Glad I didnt listen to everyone else. 

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