Veteran
Posts: 186
 
Location: Washington State | How to interpret classified horse ads BIG TROT: Can't canter within a two mile straightaway NICELY STARTED: lunges, but we don't have enough insurance to ride him yet TOP SHOW HORSE: won a reserve champion 5 years ago at a show with unusually low entries due to tornado warnings HOME BRED: knows nothing despite being raised on the back porch BIG BONED: good thing he has a mane and tail, or he would be mistaken for a cow NO VICES: especially when he wears his muzzle BOLD: runaway GOOD MOVER: runaway ATHLETIC: runaway NEEDS INTERMEDIATE RIDER: runaway SHOULD MATURE 16 HANDS: currently 13 hands, dam is 14.2, sire is 14.3 hands,every horse in pedigree back 18 generations is under 15 hands, but *this*horse will defy his DNA and grow. WELL MANNERED: hasn't stepped on, run over, bitten, or kicked anyone for a week PROFESSIONALLY TRAINED: hasn't stepped on, run over, bitten, or kicked anyone for a month RECENTLY VETTED: someone else found something really wrong with this horse TO GOOD HOME ONLY: not really for sale unless you can 1) pay twice what he is worth 2) are willing to sign a 10 page legal document 3) allow current owner to tuck in beddy-bye every night LIGHT CRIBBER: we can't afford to build anymore fences and barns for the buzz saw EXCELLENT DISposition: never been out of the stall CLIPS, HAULS, LOADS: clippity clippity is the sound his hooves make as he hauls butt across the parking lot when you try to load him. |
RE: OLDIE BUT GOODIE
Good one! 
