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 Hawty & Nawty
Posts: 20424
       
| txkrystal - 2014-11-15 11:41 AM Don't feel bad this past year i was forgotten on our anniversary and didn't receive anything for my birthday and last Christmas his family bought him and my daughter something but i got for gotten about .
I'm sorry. That hurt me to read that. Take Fatchance's suggestion. In your case, go broke doing it.
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  Fact Checker
Posts: 16572
       Location: Displaced Iowegian | Nevertooold - 2014-11-14 1:31 PM We don't buy stuff for each other and we really don't do Christmas. I'm a Bah Hum Bug and really don't like this time of year at all. I can't wait for Jan. 2nd.
LOL....the older I get the more I feel that way too. We have been married so long and have (or buy) anything we want during the year so we don't exchange gifts either....... |
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 Hog Tie My Mojo
Posts: 4847
       Location: Opelousas, LA | I buy him stuff he needs but he is usually so mad at me come Christmas morning that he just pouts around and stuffs all his gifts in the closet. Sometime later in the year he mentions he needs whatever it is he needs and I tell him the boys or I got it for him for Christmas and he will go find it so he can use it. He pretty much never buys me anything for Christmas, just tells me to go buy what I need.
I have really started to hate the holidays because it is just a lot of extra work trying to make things fun for the kids and nice for the rest of the family. We don't get days off so everything gets put off til the last minute and then he gets mad because I expect him to help and I get mad because he won't. I am trying very hard this year to get things done way early, just too much stress otherwise.
I am going to splurge this year and hire someone to deep clean the house before Thanksgiving, not planning on asking for approval either, lol. |
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 I Don't Brag
Posts: 6960
        
| txkrystal - 2014-11-14 1:41 PM
Don't feel bad this past year i was forgotten on our anniversary and didn't receive anything for my birthday and last Christmas his family bought him and my daughter something but i got for gotten about .
Don't YOU feel bad. Mine has remembered my birthday maybe 3 times in the 36 years we have been married and two of those have been since I told him NOT to remember since I wasn't HAVING any anymore. LOL
Anniversaries....well he does tell me Happy Anniversary if he remembers. But I think I have decided that his support throughout the year rather than a few gifts on certain days. |
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 Veteran
Posts: 211
  Location: Vinton, La. | Married for 24 years and mine has no clue what to get me every Christmas. One year he bought me a pair of slippers two sizes too small. And another year I got a saddle bronc bronze. Uh, yea saddle bronc. Yes, I smiled and told him I loved the bronze and stuffed my big feet in those little slippers when he was home. But for the last 5 years I just told him to buy what he wanted and I'd go shopping in Ruidoso. He agreed and I spend a small fortune once a year.  |
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 A Somebody to Everybody
Posts: 41354
              Location: Under The Big Sky Of Texas | Bigtime mistake - 2014-11-14 8:52 PM Married for 24 years and mine has no clue what to get me every Christmas. One year he bought me a pair of slippers two sizes too small. And another year I got a saddle bronc bronze. Uh, yea saddle bronc. Yes, I smiled and told him I loved the bronze and stuffed my big feet in those little slippers when he was home. But for the last 5 years I just told him to buy what he wanted and I'd go shopping in Ruidoso. He agreed and I spend a small fortune once a year. 
Awww you sound like such a loving wife  |
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 Veteran
Posts: 211
  Location: Vinton, La. | LOL Roxie! He buys tractors. I go to Ruidoso. It's a great trade off. |
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 A Somebody to Everybody
Posts: 41354
              Location: Under The Big Sky Of Texas | Bigtime mistake - 2014-11-14 8:59 PM LOL Roxie! He buys tractors. I go to Ruidoso. It's a great trade off.
That is a good trade off. LOL My hubby buys cars and I buy saddles, lol..We been married for 34 years so we pretty much buy for ourselfs, if we see something that we like we just get it. So pretty much we buy for our sons and their familys, I love buying for the grandkids.  |
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  Expert
Posts: 1960
        Location: NW Arkansas | GLP - 2014-11-14 10:06 AM We have started a new tradition. We don't give big gifts just something for under the tree. Instead we treat ourselves to Vegas during the NFR. He has a stressful job and it makes me so happy to see his childish delight when we leave for the airport to go to Vegas. It's his big de-stress time. He is excited already about going.
This is what my husband surprised me with this year! We went last year and he loved it. In October he told me he'd booked the first weekend of the NFR for us for Christmas. He said don't buy me any gifts, we'll shop at the NFR. |
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 Buttered Noodles Snacker
Posts: 4377
        Location: NC | UTAHCANCHASER - 2014-11-14 1:12 PM
My SO and I do exchange gifts. Except for last year, he was starting a new business so I didn't get anything. This year he better make up for it big time by putting a rock on my finger....
He is usually really good about getting me great gifts.  He made up for Christmas last year by getting me a great birthday present. His only downfall is he can't wait until the day of to give anything so it is a surprise so I always end up getting my presents a couple of days in advance if not sooner.Â
Mine is bad for this too. As soon as he gets me something he wants to give it to me. And if I don't let him he wants me to try n guess what it is... Hahaha |
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 Hawty & Nawty
Posts: 20424
       
| Some of these post are really depressing. I didn't expect that. So maybe the better point to make would be to remind ourselves the reason for the season and be grateful for another day in which to hug our loved ones and remind them how special they are to us. |
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 Expert
Posts: 1718
    Location: Southeast Louisiana | We do give gifts. But, the real gift is that we listen to each other. It's usually something inexpensive, but something the other mentioned in conversation. |
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 California Cowgirl
Posts: 14973
           Location: California | I've already got my husband planned out for gifts . I really don't want anything or need anything but he keeps asking so more than anything I asked him to help me decorate the house (inside and out) and to take a trip to see my family next year when he gets more vacation days . I think the best gift he could have given was acknowledging the communication errors we have been having and really putting an effort in fixing the things that were upsetting to me. His Birthday is the day after so Ive had to think double the goodies but I've made note of things he has mentioned/looked at over the year. This is our first Christmas with his family and not mine. I am more stressed about his family doing a name drawing for gifts and I ended up with his step sisters husband (who I have never met). It will be a new experience for sure.
Edited by F Bar 2014-11-15 4:47 PM
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I just read the headlines
Posts: 4483
        
| Glad things are looking up for you!  |
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Elite Veteran
Posts: 1034
 
| RidenFly - 2014-11-14 9:24 AM
 Sometimes, you have to whack the guy over the head because being sweet and submissive doesn't do the trick.  I've been married for 14 years and every Christmas is always the same. He gets gifts from me but I get last minute stuff you find at the gas station because even though the house is decorated, there is a six foot tree, the street lamps have garland and our music station is playing carols, he had no idea the holidays was upon him.  I can' t take another year of "I'll make it up to you, babe." So, this year, I sat him down.  "Have you noticed what time of the year it is?" "Yeah, why?" "Well, I just thought I'd mention that Christmas is going to be here before you know it and you should be prepared." "What do you want me to fix this time?" "Just make sure you go shopping so you don't feel bad on Christmas." "Oh, yeah. I do, do that. You might want to remind me later." "How about I paint something on my forehead?"  Okay..so cool. I did my part and reminded him again and he knows that this year he's going to get good stuff because now I'm his sugar mama.    Well, I'll be damned...I caught him. I caught him buying me something early. I haven't gotten him anything yet. You folks better remind me not to forget about him. LOL....
So...when it comes to Christmas do you and your spouse exchange gifts?
Reading your post I started to think maybe my hubby got. BHW handle and was complaining about ME. LOL!! I'm terrible. He's always on top of stuff and I procrastinate. |
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Elite Veteran
Posts: 1034
 
| fatchance - 2014-11-14 10:29 AM
For the women who have husbands who pull the BS card about not shopping or knowing what to get you, I would suggest that you go out and shop for yourself, and I mean go big. Wrap it all up and hide it, Christmas eve after he has gone to bed put your presents under the tree. Watch his face as you open them screaming with joy over the gifts he's not sure how they got there....until the bill arrives. I promise the bill will make him go shopping for you next Christmas. 
I love it!! And I'm a little afraid my hubby will do that. HAHAHAHAAAA!! |
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 I Prefer to Live in Fantasy Land
Posts: 64864
                    Location: In the Hills of Texas | F Bar - 2014-11-15 4:45 PM I've already got my husband planned out for gifts . I really don't want anything or need anything but he keeps asking so more than anything I asked him to help me decorate the house (inside and out) and to take a trip to see my family next year when he gets more vacation days . I think the best gift he could have given was acknowledging the communication errors we have been having and really putting an effort in fixing the things that were upsetting to me.
His Birthday is the day after so Ive had to think double the goodies but I've made note of things he has mentioned/looked at over the year. This is our first Christmas with his family and not mine. I am more stressed about his family doing a name drawing for gifts and I ended up with his step sisters husband (who I have never met). It will be a new experience for sure.
I didn't know that you and your husband were back together. That's a nice gift. Hope you work everything out.. |
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 I hate cooking and cleaning
Posts: 3310
     Location: Jersey Girl | Most years we do exchange gifts but there have been years that we buy something for the house instead.
I have learned with Christmas (and birthdays) you have to completely spell out to them what you want and/or expect. Makes it so its not so dissappointing. |
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  Playing the Waiting Game
Posts: 2304
   
| I'm a scrooge....Gifts at Christmas have always been a dissappointment to me. When I was young my mom had 8 kids and for some reason she could never figure me out.. Still can't... I don't know that I ever got a gift I wanted or needed. EVER... Seemed like she got me what my older sister Vicky wanted. SO my sister got two gifts I got nothing... One year I was 12 mom got me a BARBIE DOLL!! Really I asked for a new set of reins for my bridle, which were cheaper than that dumb doll (I gave that doll to my 8 year old cousin)... for the record I was NEVER a barbie doll girl.. Tonka trucks and matchbox cars yes, not DOLLS. And the last time I was home for Christmas mom gave me a "snowbaby" Christmas tree ornament ugliest thing I ever saw, ahhh mom they make all kinds of horsey ones for half the price.
SO when I got married my then husband asked me what I wanted for Christmas I told him I wanted a floor jack for the car, and a nintendo gameplayer... He told me "I can't get my wife a floor jack! What else?" SO I told him "Don't get me anything, if ya ask what I want and don't like what I ask for I don't want anything." I got the nintedo... got the floor jack for my bithday
SO I had decided I was not going to make the same mistake my mother did and figured out my boys are individuals and got them gifts that said so. Christmas gift giving is for kids and I love to see them with happy faces...
I am a big advocate of keeping Christ in Christmas and try to enjoy the holiday with family and friends and try to stay away from the commercialization. |
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 Expert
Posts: 1718
    Location: Southeast Louisiana | suzy2qtee - 2014-11-16 10:15 AM
I'm a scrooge....Gifts at Christmas have always been a dissappointment to me. When I was young my mom had 8 kids and for some reason she could never figure me out.. Still can't... I don't know that I ever got a gift I wanted or needed. EVER... Seemed like she got me what my older sister Vicky wanted. SO my sister got two gifts I got nothing... One year I was 12 mom got me a BARBIE DOLL!! Really I asked for a new set of reins for my bridle, which were cheaper than that dumb doll (I gave that doll to my 8 year old cousin)... for the record I was NEVER a barbie doll girl.. Tonka trucks and matchbox cars yes, not DOLLS. And the last time I was home for Christmas mom gave me a "snowbaby" Christmas tree ornament ugliest thing I ever saw, ahhh mom they make all kinds of horsey ones for half the price.
SO when I got married my then husband asked me what I wanted for Christmas I told him I wanted a floor jack for the car, and a nintendo gameplayer... He told me "I can't get my wife a floor jack! What else?" Â SO I told him "Don't get me anything, if ya ask what I want and don't like what I ask for I don't want anything." I got the nintedo... got the floor jack for my bithday SO I had decided I was not going to make the same mistake my mother did and figured out my boys are individuals and got them gifts that said so. Christmas gift giving is for kids and I love to see them with happy faces...
I am a big advocate of keeping Christ in Christmas and try to enjoy the holiday with family and friends and try to stay away from the commercialization.
I can totally sympathize with you, Suzy! My mom tried to make me fit what she thought I should like, too.
For my last birthday, my husband told me, "I'm not getting you sand." He laughs that I show off my tack set and tell everyone he is the one who got that for me, but he never sees me showing off my diamond necklace. He just doesn't always get me. He does try, though. And I love him for that. |
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