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Complete life change? Thoughts?

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Last activity 2015-12-31 12:32 PM
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darchick
Reg. Jan 2004
Posted 2015-12-29 6:11 PM
Subject: Complete life change? Thoughts?




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This past year has been rough on my family.  We lost my mom unexpectedly in August due to an aggressive type of cancer.  Two months later, we lost my stepdad (but more like my real dad), also to cancer.  It was a whirlwind year and I've been doing lots of soul searching over the past 6 months.

We listed our farm for sale one month before my mom's diagnosis.  We didn't think it would sell that quickly, but low and behold we got an excellent offer the first week of December.  I explained that we couldn't think about moving with the holidays approaching and the loss of both my parents.  I asked that we revisit the offer after the New Year and the buyer's agreed.

I am wanting to completely relocate and start over.  We are looking at Texas.  I always wanted to live there, but stayed home to be close to my parents and care for them when they got old.  Now they are gone and there is little that is keeping us from making the move.

I'm in contact with recruiters in Texas that have several job prospects for me.  My husband, however, has a more specialized job and it is very secure and would be hard to leave.  But he says he wants to do something different, too.  So he is willing to relocate and find different work.  But he can easily be looked over due to his years of experience and higher price tag.

I've weighed the pros and cons, but they seem to have equal weight, so it's hard to make a decision.  We also have two small kids and they would be uprooted from the only home they've ever known.

Has anyone ever made this type of drastic life change and what advice can you give?

TIA
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run n rate
Reg. Feb 2007
Posted 2015-12-29 6:26 PM
Subject: RE: Complete life change? Thoughts?



Balance Beam and more...


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I have no advice, just wanted to send hugs to you for your losses. I lost my mom in July and still trying to figure out how to do life without her myself...
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Peewee212
Reg. Sep 2012
Posted 2015-12-29 8:21 PM
Subject: RE: Complete life change? Thoughts?



Extreme Veteran


Posts: 312
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Location: KS
No advice either just know were thinking and praying for you. Ive only lived in one place my whole life, my husband the same place so I can't imagine but what and opportunity especially since its something both you and your husband feel you can do. Ive always been told young kids adjust really quickly so don't let that hold you back. Good Luck!!
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rodeomom3
Reg. Dec 2007
Posted 2015-12-29 8:29 PM
Subject: RE: Complete life change? Thoughts?



Shelter Dog Lover


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 Hugs and prayers.   I say try it, nothing is permanent, if you don't like it you can move back.   Young children make it a little more challenging but the older they get the much harder it will be to pick up move as they get involved in school and other activities.   Good luck! 
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BS Hauler
Reg. Jan 2012
Posted 2015-12-29 9:55 PM
Subject: RE: Complete life change? Thoughts?


Expert


Posts: 1314
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Location: North Central Iowa Land of white frozen grass
Go for the move. 
Look at what courage it took for the people that settled this great country.
A lot of them were just teenage kids coming from other countrys and had no idea what lay in front of them.
Your move is pretty small up to what our great ancestors went thru.

 
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RocketPilot
Reg. Jun 2006
Posted 2015-12-29 10:12 PM
Subject: RE: Complete life change? Thoughts?



No Tune in a Bucket


Posts: 2935
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Location: Texas
Mind if I ask where you are now?  I was born in Texas and have lived here my whole life here as have all of my immediate family.  Not a bad place to relocate to.  Come on. 
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cavyrunsbarrels
Reg. Dec 2010
Posted 2015-12-30 9:11 AM
Subject: RE: Complete life change? Thoughts?


Red Bull Agressive


Posts: 5981
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Location: North Dakota
Not that it's worth anything, but it sounds to me like making this move would be good for you! And speaking as a kid that lived in 3 different states in high school, don't worry about the kids. Having to readjust I think helped me become more resilient and not fear change like some people. It was hard to leave my friends but overall I would not change it. 
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BigStarBound
Reg. Oct 2015
Posted 2015-12-30 10:05 AM
Subject: RE: Complete life change? Thoughts?



Extreme Veteran


Posts: 434
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Location: Northwest Florida
I'm so sorry for your losses.
I vote move. I've lived in 5 different states since I graduated high school (6 years ago). I wouldn't change a thing. I love new places, new faces, and new adventures. It definitely keeps life exciting and if you are feeling an itch for a change go for it!

This is what I did when I was preparing for my first move across the country on my own and I was nervous - I wrote a letter to my future self, as if I had not gone through with the move. I explained the reasons why I stayed (fear of failure, potential financial stress) and didn't go through with it. When I reread the letter I pictured myself years later, still in the same town, living the same unsatisfying life I was living, and I knew then that the reasons I gave myself were very unimportant. I got a chance to feel the regret of missed opportunity, without actually missing it!

I don't have children but I understand your worry about uprooting young ones. However, I grew up an army brat and we moved every few years. Being the "new kid" was tough for about the first day, but I adjusted and I am thankful for it.

Good luck to you and whatever decision you make. (PS- I've lived in TX, it's great!)
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Southtxponygirl
Reg. Nov 2006
Posted 2015-12-30 10:12 AM
Subject: RE: Complete life change? Thoughts?



A Somebody to Everybody


Posts: 41354
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Location: Under The Big Sky Of Texas
BigStarBound - 2015-12-30 10:05 AM I'm so sorry for your losses. I vote move. I've lived in 5 different states since I graduated high school (6 years ago). I wouldn't change a thing. I love new places, new faces, and new adventures. It definitely keeps life exciting and if you are feeling an itch for a change go for it! This is what I did when I was preparing for my first move across the country on my own and I was nervous - I wrote a letter to my future self, as if I had not gone through with the move. I explained the reasons why I stayed (fear of failure, potential financial stress) and didn't go through with it. When I reread the letter I pictured myself years later, still in the same town, living the same unsatisfying life I was living, and I knew then that the reasons I gave myself were very unimportant. I got a chance to feel the regret of missed opportunity, without actually missing it! I don't have children but I understand your worry about uprooting young ones. However, I grew up an army brat and we moved every few years. Being the "new kid" was tough for about the first day, but I adjusted and I am thankful for it. Good luck to you and whatever decision you make. (PS- I've lived in TX, it's great!)

Wow you are so mature for being so young, I was thinking you were in your late 30's maybe early 40's, lol..You have a great way of looking at life, I like that  
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hoofs_in_motion
Reg. Apr 2011
Posted 2015-12-30 10:30 AM
Subject: RE: Complete life change? Thoughts?



Undercover Amish Mafia Member


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Location: Kansas
 
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Southtxponygirl
Reg. Nov 2006
Posted 2015-12-30 10:34 AM
Subject: RE: Complete life change? Thoughts?



A Somebody to Everybody


Posts: 41354
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Location: Under The Big Sky Of Texas
So you guys are planning on moving to a different state? Where are you living now? And what part of Texas are you thinking? If you are planning on coming our way I wanted to tell you welcome, Texas is a great place to be.
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darchick
Reg. Jan 2004
Posted 2015-12-31 11:54 AM
Subject: RE: Complete life change? Thoughts?




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 Y'all give great advice! Some even made me teary eyed! 

We would be moving from Arkansas and we are looking at north Texas. 
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hammer_time
Reg. Jul 2007
Posted 2015-12-31 12:32 PM
Subject: RE: Complete life change? Thoughts?



Money Eating Baggage Owner


Posts: 9586
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Location: Phoenix
 I vote move.  My parents said over and over how they wished they would have moved where they originally wanted.  And now they are separated and my dad lives where they always wanted!  I considered Texas when I moved away from home but we ended up in AZ and I'm so glad.  Good luck!!  P
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