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| How long are you planning on staying at your destination wedding site? If it's longer than 5 days, I wouldn't rule out places that require a 3 day waiting period for a wedding license. When we got married, Montana required a waiting period, so we just planned to get our marriage license the morning after we got to my parent's place, and then got married three or four days later. If there's certain places you are overlooking because of this wait time, I say don't count them out.
Others have mentioned going to the courthouse, getting married first and then taking a honeymoon. If no one will be going with you on this trip, then you might as well just pick a date, go to the courthouse and get married (just the two of you, no one else needs to know except a witness or two), then go enjoy yourselves with less stress, and no fancy dress to worry about. You can still bring a casual sun dress and he can bring his hat (they're both pretty easy to travel with, as long as they're carried on- I would never check them!).
There are a lot of beautiful places with beaches that aren't exactly tropical; Lake Tahoe is gorgeous (and you could always make a pit stop in Vegas and elope there on an extended layover, then finish the flight to Reno). | |
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 Experienced Mouse Trapper
Posts: 3106
 
Location: North Dakota | I think I agree with Barrelhorseusa 
If you are stressing out so much now and the cost is going to be close to $10k, why not find an ordained minister in your area-and a park. I've been married for 20 years-had a real cut down version for a wedding-church, family, danced the night away and it was still stressful-you cannot make everyone happy-so do what you want to do-you don't sound like you're the beach type??? Why not go to vegas-if people show up-they show up-make the memories for you and your husband-not your families........ | |
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 Am I really the Weirdo?
Posts: 11181
Location: Kansas | OK yesterday was a great productive day and I think we are close to having the whole thing planned!
We've basically decided to elope to Ocean Isle Beach, North Carolina, and stay in a resort there with a honeymoon package, do an inexpensive beach wedding ceremony from a company out of Myrtle Beach, and it looks like only my best friend and her husband will be attending. She went to college in South Carolina so is combining Matt and I's wedding with a vacation for her family. Plus I went to their destination wedding in California, so that's cool.
If the ceremony package we want is available on the day we want, we'll have the airfare, lodging, rental car, ceremony, photos, and marriage license all figured out for what I think is a super reasonable price, and we won't have to sell any horses to pay for it! LOL. | |
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 Too Skinny
Posts: 8009
Location: LA Lower Alabama | OhMax - 2018-03-05 3:15 PM I just watched a segment on the news where 2 reporters went to a resort, one was all inclusive and the other paid as he went. They ate, drank, and did identical activities. And they didn’t skimp. The guy who paid as he went saved about $400. They said unless you plan to consume a LOT of alcohol (think crazy spring breakers) or spend all your time running around doing every possible activity...you’d be better off paying as you go.
Yes that is how they make money. They up charge to make a profit. If the room is $50 a night the charge you $60 in the package so that they get a little cut. | |
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Am I really the Weirdo?
Posts: 11181
Location: Kansas | cowgalsissy - 2018-03-06 11:05 AM OhMax - 2018-03-05 3:15 PM I just watched a segment on the news where 2 reporters went to a resort, one was all inclusive and the other paid as he went. They ate, drank, and did identical activities. And they didn’t skimp. The guy who paid as he went saved about $400. They said unless you plan to consume a LOT of alcohol (think crazy spring breakers) or spend all your time running around doing every possible activity...you’d be better off paying as you go. Yes that is how they make money. They up charge to make a profit. If the room is $50 a night the charge you $60 in the package so that they get a little cut.
That doesn't surprise me at all. We are probably going to do a couple of tourist things and mostly just hang out and relax so I think the resort we have in mind with its 3 pools and hot tub will be about right. I'm finding some neat activities to do around the resort so Groupon is probably about to be my new best friend LOL. | |
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Expert
Posts: 1314
Location: North Central Iowa Land of white frozen grass | When my wife and I got married 37 years ago we didn't have a lot of money to spend. We had a small church wedding and then we had a hog roast in our farm shop. We invited everyone in our farm community. Had the local pork producers cook it and served it. Had a blast. Problably had 400 to 500 guest at the shed party. | |
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 BHW Resident Surgeon
Posts: 25351
Location: Bastrop, Texas | You folks live in Kansas, right?
I’m guessing because you are young, you both haven’t done much vacationing in the Caribbean. I’ll work on that assumption, plus I assume you will love snorkeling, white sand beaches that aren’t too crowded, and water that is so turquoise that you can’t believe it’s real. I’m also guessing you want to be sensible, in terms of your budget. I’ll give this my best shot, and throw in some random opinions.
I think all-inclusives can be OK, but I’m not crazy about them.
For one thing, after about 2 days, the food all tends to taste the same.
I just think you can do better and have a very unique, special experience.
What’s your budget (air fare and lodging)?
Would you be open to deferring your honeymoon until next winter?
By that I mean just tie the knot in May and wait till it’s colder than a well diggers ass in the Klondike. | |
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Industrial Srength Barrel Racer
Posts: 7264
| rodeowithjoker - 2018-03-06 9:28 AM
OK yesterday was a great productive day and I think we are close to having the whole thing planned!
We've basically decided to elope to Ocean Isle Beach, North Carolina, and stay in a resort there with a honeymoon package, do an inexpensive beach wedding ceremony from a company out of Myrtle Beach, and it looks like only my best friend and her husband will be attending. She went to college in South Carolina so is combining Matt and I's wedding with a vacation for her family. Plus I went to their destination wedding in California, so that's cool.
If the ceremony package we want is available on the day we want, we'll have the airfare, lodging, rental car, ceremony, photos, and marriage license all figured out for what I think is a super reasonable price, and we won't have to sell any horses to pay for it! LOL.
This is awesome and sounds like a ton of fun! You will HAVE to post pictures for us all!!  | |
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Am I really the Weirdo?
Posts: 11181
Location: Kansas | Griz - 2018-03-07 5:39 AM rodeowithjoker - 2018-03-06 9:28 AM OK yesterday was a great productive day and I think we are close to having the whole thing planned!
We've basically decided to elope to Ocean Isle Beach, North Carolina, and stay in a resort there with a honeymoon package, do an inexpensive beach wedding ceremony from a company out of Myrtle Beach, and it looks like only my best friend and her husband will be attending. She went to college in South Carolina so is combining Matt and I's wedding with a vacation for her family. Plus I went to their destination wedding in California, so that's cool.
If the ceremony package we want is available on the day we want, we'll have the airfare, lodging, rental car, ceremony, photos, and marriage license all figured out for what I think is a super reasonable price, and we won't have to sell any horses to pay for it! LOL. This is awesome and sounds like a ton of fun! You will HAVE to post pictures for us all!!
It's booked! I'm so excited!!!
We never go anywhere without horses so this will be a fun change of pace and the pictures ought to be beautiful.  | |
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 My Heart Be Happy
Posts: 9159
Location: Arkansas | rodeowithjoker - 2018-03-08 12:19 PM
Griz - 2018-03-07 5:39 AM rodeowithjoker - 2018-03-06 9:28 AM OK yesterday was a great productive day and I think we are close to having the whole thing planned!
We've basically decided to elope to Ocean Isle Beach, North Carolina, and stay in a resort there with a honeymoon package, do an inexpensive beach wedding ceremony from a company out of Myrtle Beach, and it looks like only my best friend and her husband will be attending. She went to college in South Carolina so is combining Matt and I's wedding with a vacation for her family. Plus I went to their destination wedding in California, so that's cool.
If the ceremony package we want is available on the day we want, we'll have the airfare, lodging, rental car, ceremony, photos, and marriage license all figured out for what I think is a super reasonable price, and we won't have to sell any horses to pay for it! LOL. This is awesome and sounds like a ton of fun! You will HAVE to post pictures for us all!!
We never go anywhere without horses so this will be a fun change of pace and the pictures ought to be beautiful.
Hence, we will want to see said pictures!! | |
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 Elite Veteran
Posts: 898
Location: Idaho | rodeowithjoker - 2018-03-06 7:06 AM
My fiance and I are planning to get married sometime around Memorial Day weekend and we've just about given up on a traditional wedding near our hometowns so are looking at doing a destination wedding/honeymoon combination trip instead.
As I look for places to stay online, I'm trying to be financially responsible and find the best deal. Therefore I have a few questions.
1. He's been hearing about "all-inclusive" resorts but I honestly don't know what all is included at one of those. Any information is appreciated. Matt thought that some of them included meals, and I just want to know what we will have to budget for.
2. Any suggestions on possible places to go for this shindig would be great. Requirements: Beach, inexpensive elopment package (probably $600 or less), not super busy so something off the beaten path would be great. We've looked into Puerto Rico, some places in Mexico (but decided a domestic trip would be less hassle), and I've started researching places in North Carolina. We really want to find a state that doesn't have a 3 day waiting period for a marriage license, so Texas doesn't seem to be a good option. I haven't had a lot of luck finding anything reasonably priced in Florida and haven't had a chance to look much in California. We're not set on a popular place.....really a quiet, low-key location would be great.
3. How in the world do you travel by air with a wedding dress and a cowboy hat? LOL
Well, to be honest I don't think you will get an all inclusive package for $600 or less. I would say save up a little bit more money if you want something small but nice.
My husband and I did a destination wedding. We live in Idaho and our wedding was at a Disneyworld resort in Florida. All in all it cost us about $8K, with the hotel, the wedding ceremony, the reception, food, DJ, photographer, wedding planner etc. We did a small honeymoon there at Disneyworld but our actual big honeymoon will be happening at our one year anniversary. It was pretty lovely, we had a very small intimate wedding with mainly our family and close friends. We did not want anything huge and extravagant and it was perfect. Also be a reminder, I know that dates are important but if it is on a holiday weekend.. most likely prices will be bumped up because it is a holiday weekend.
We also looked into a "beach" wedding, all inclusive package like at these all inclusive resorts (a friend of our did Sandals..) They had an amazing experience BUT..it's extremely expensive and also, if you look at the reviews on Sandals it is definitely not something I would put my money into. Make sure you do your research. You also want to keep in mind hurricane seasons and try to avoid that, because it can totally mess up your vacation!
Lastly, to travel with your dress is a pain in the hiney. When we traveled to Florida I carried my dress with me and they do have Captain's closet's where you can put your dress in there. Some are smaller than other, we took two flights and I nearly had a heart attack on the second flight because the closet was small, we were boarding, had a ton of people behind me and I had to shove my dress in there to take a seat (Talk about an anxiety attack!). Luckily, my amazing husband came to my rescue, once everyone was seated he got up and rearranged the dress so it wouldn't get messed up. BUT.. on the way back, because we brought all the decorations for the wedding.. the wedding was done.. we had an extra super big suitcase and we just neatly folded the dress in half (skirt on the bottom, top portion on the top) and it fit in there, so we were able to check it in with the baggage so we didn't have to deal with the hassle. Same with cowboy hat, get a hat holder and bring it as a carry on, you should be fine.
And also, I would suggest getting married on paper BEFORE your ceremony. All you need is two witnesses and the person to legally "marry" you. We did a civil ceremony, and make it as least like your "wedding ceremony" as possible. When we did it, we were dress in jeans, t shirt, and did it in our living room with two friends. We did not have to exchange rings, she just asked us a single question of whether or not we were joined in holy matrimony, signed a paper, and we were done. Don't change your name until after the ceremony. We did not want to take away from the actual ceremony of our special day, so we minimized it as much as possible and our wedding anniversary is the day we got married in front of friends and family.
Sorry for the novel, hope this helps!
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Am I really the Weirdo?
Posts: 11181
Location: Kansas | DashNDustem - 2018-03-13 1:30 PM rodeowithjoker - 2018-03-06 7:06 AM My fiance and I are planning to get married sometime around Memorial Day weekend and we've just about given up on a traditional wedding near our hometowns so are looking at doing a destination wedding/honeymoon combination trip instead.
As I look for places to stay online, I'm trying to be financially responsible and find the best deal. Therefore I have a few questions.
1. He's been hearing about "all-inclusive" resorts but I honestly don't know what all is included at one of those. Any information is appreciated. Matt thought that some of them included meals, and I just want to know what we will have to budget for.
2. Any suggestions on possible places to go for this shindig would be great. Requirements: Beach, inexpensive elopment package (probably $600 or less), not super busy so something off the beaten path would be great. We've looked into Puerto Rico, some places in Mexico (but decided a domestic trip would be less hassle), and I've started researching places in North Carolina. We really want to find a state that doesn't have a 3 day waiting period for a marriage license, so Texas doesn't seem to be a good option. I haven't had a lot of luck finding anything reasonably priced in Florida and haven't had a chance to look much in California. We're not set on a popular place.....really a quiet, low-key location would be great.
3. How in the world do you travel by air with a wedding dress and a cowboy hat? LOL Well, to be honest I don't think you will get an all inclusive package for $600 or less. I would say save up a little bit more money if you want something small but nice. My husband and I did a destination wedding. We live in Idaho and our wedding was at a Disneyworld resort in Florida. All in all it cost us about $8K, with the hotel, the wedding ceremony, the reception, food, DJ, photographer, wedding planner etc. We did a small honeymoon there at Disneyworld but our actual big honeymoon will be happening at our one year anniversary. It was pretty lovely, we had a very small intimate wedding with mainly our family and close friends. We did not want anything huge and extravagant and it was perfect. Also be a reminder, I know that dates are important but if it is on a holiday weekend.. most likely prices will be bumped up because it is a holiday weekend. We also looked into a "beach" wedding, all inclusive package like at these all inclusive resorts (a friend of our did Sandals.. ) They had an amazing experience BUT..it's extremely expensive and also, if you look at the reviews on Sandals it is definitely not something I would put my money into. Make sure you do your research. You also want to keep in mind hurricane seasons and try to avoid that, because it can totally mess up your vacation! Lastly, to travel with your dress is a pain in the hiney. When we traveled to Florida I carried my dress with me and they do have Captain's closet's where you can put your dress in there. Some are smaller than other, we took two flights and I nearly had a heart attack on the second flight because the closet was small, we were boarding, had a ton of people behind me and I had to shove my dress in there to take a seat (Talk about an anxiety attack! ). Luckily, my amazing husband came to my rescue, once everyone was seated he got up and rearranged the dress so it wouldn't get messed up. BUT.. on the way back, because we brought all the decorations for the wedding.. the wedding was done.. we had an extra super big suitcase and we just neatly folded the dress in half (skirt on the bottom, top portion on the top ) and it fit in there, so we were able to check it in with the baggage so we didn't have to deal with the hassle. Same with cowboy hat, get a hat holder and bring it as a carry on, you should be fine. And also, I would suggest getting married on paper BEFORE your ceremony. All you need is two witnesses and the person to legally "marry" you. We did a civil ceremony, and make it as least like your "wedding ceremony" as possible. When we did it, we were dress in jeans, t shirt, and did it in our living room with two friends. We did not have to exchange rings, she just asked us a single question of whether or not we were joined in holy matrimony, signed a paper, and we were done. Don't change your name until after the ceremony. We did not want to take away from the actual ceremony of our special day, so we minimized it as much as possible and our wedding anniversary is the day we got married in front of friends and family. Sorry for the novel, hope this helps!
On the price, I meant for the wedding ceremony, not the whole honeymoon. We found a wedding company with great reviews within the budget I wanted, my parents offered to pay about half, and I think I actually have everything figured out. Such a relief!!! | |
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Regular
Posts: 65
| We did what you are wanting. We could not afford the "Traditional" type wedding. My husband was raised catholic, I was not raised in a church, so as we started to plan, the whole process started to become pretty tense. I did not want to marry in a church, his family wanted him too and he didn't really care. We also could not afford a big wedding, reception and a honeymoon. So we did the weddymoon combo. We went on a Caribbean cruise and got married when we stopped at St. Thomas and got married on the beach. The cruise was around $1200 for both of us. I got the wedding info contact person on St. Thomas from Carnival Cruise Lines. That was around $750 and included the license, guy who married us, cake and champagne. The cruise line has a photographer and I think our pictures were around $150. You can buy more if you want for an additional $$$. We spent the day on St. Thomas, got back on the boat and headed to the next island. We had a small reception for friends and family when we got back. It's not perfect for everyone, but it was perfect for us. I was more interested in going on a nice trip then making everyone else happy with a big fancy wedding at home, that didn't matter to me. We've been married for almost 20 years and I would do the exact thing all over again. My mom did fly to the island and we had some friends who had gotten married the month before and that was their honeymoon. So we had a couple friends on the boat with us. It was all good.
The drawback with what we did: I did carry my dress on the plane, that sucked. It was Hotter then Haiti....I probably would not take another cruise unless it was for a similar situation. I didn't care for the cruise itself, but I did enjoy visiting the different islands, it gave us a good idea of what islands we would want to visit again.
The only thing that matters, IMO, is what you and your guy wants, don't worry about your friends and family, they should support you regardless of your choice. It's about YOU, not them. Spend your money on what's important to you.
Good Luck and Congratulations. | |
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