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Blessed 
                      Location: Here | fatchance - 2014-03-07 2:22 PM He doesn't want to officially terminate you because he doesn't want you to go get unemployment.Hope I am wrong!
I agree. Did you access to email today? Good job showing up for work!!! |
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 Always Off Topic
Posts: 6382
        Location: ND | TXBO - 2014-03-07 3:54 PM horsefever - 2014-03-07 12:49 PM batkitty - 2014-03-07 12:45 PM If you are terminated, could your boss have done something and needed someone to blame? Then used the travel thing as an excuse? I know that's more like a soap opera but I've seen such stuff happen. Either way, many hugs and prayers. When I was hiring I would have loved to found an employee like you. Thank you for that. No update but the day is not over yet. He has not spoken a word to me.
If you value your job, go to him and tell him you will find a way to make the trip....Then do it.
agreed |
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Cold hands and Warm Heart
      Location: oklahoma | dhdqhllc - 2014-03-07 7:38 PM TXBO - 2014-03-07 3:54 PM horsefever - 2014-03-07 12:49 PM batkitty - 2014-03-07 12:45 PM If you are terminated, could your boss have done something and needed someone to blame? Then used the travel thing as an excuse? I know that's more like a soap opera but I've seen such stuff happen. Either way, many hugs and prayers. When I was hiring I would have loved to found an employee like you. Thank you for that. No update but the day is not over yet. He has not spoken a word to me.
If you value your job, go to him and tell him you will find a way to make the trip....Then do it. agreed
Even though I value both of you guys' opinions, this time I think you're both way off. It's far different for a man to leave town without the kids, than a woman, because normally, the wife, ex, sometime girlfriend, mil, grandma, neighbor down the street that I barely know would be left in charge with them. She's stated that there's no family or close friends, so who is she supposed to leave them with? |
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 MEOW!
Posts: 4477
         Location: High heels in the air... | No, Go tell him you are working on it. Ask for an itinery and travel dates...Call his bluff...Maybe HE is getting fired and needs support at HDQ...and go if you can...this could be a good thing... |
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The Advice Guru
Posts: 6419
     
| Hope today is going well for you |
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 Googly Goo
Posts: 7053
   
| fatchance - 2014-03-07 2:22 PM He doesn't want to officially terminate you because he doesn't want you to go get unemployment.Hope I am wrong!
In many states, if you are fired for due cause, you don't qualify for unemployment benefits. Refusing to attend a required meeting could certainly be considered due cause. If she has never been asked to travel before, it's possible that the labor board would consider this a change in responsibility and grant benefits......But that's quite a risk to take if you have a good job. |
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 Googly Goo
Posts: 7053
   
| CurlyQ - 2014-03-07 7:51 PM dhdqhllc - 2014-03-07 7:38 PM TXBO - 2014-03-07 3:54 PM horsefever - 2014-03-07 12:49 PM batkitty - 2014-03-07 12:45 PM If you are terminated, could your boss have done something and needed someone to blame? Then used the travel thing as an excuse? I know that's more like a soap opera but I've seen such stuff happen. Either way, many hugs and prayers. When I was hiring I would have loved to found an employee like you. Thank you for that. No update but the day is not over yet. He has not spoken a word to me.
If you value your job, go to him and tell him you will find a way to make the trip....Then do it. agreed Even though I value both of you guys' opinions, this time I think you're both way off. It's far different for a man to leave town without the kids, than a woman, because normally, the wife, ex, sometime girlfriend, mil, grandma, neighbor down the street that I barely know would be left in charge with them. She's stated that there's no family or close friends, so who is she supposed to leave them with?
Based on the dislikes, a lot of people think we're way off. LOL!
I'm not trying to be harsh or flippant. She's already dealing with the father splitting and searching to replace good employment is just adding to her burden. It should be avoided right now at all cost. Some of the advice I'm hearing is taking quite a risk with someone else's livelyhood. |
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Hungarian Midget Woman
    Location: Midwest | TXBO - 2014-03-08 12:23 PM
CurlyQ - 2014-03-07 7:51 PM dhdqhllc - 2014-03-07 7:38 PM TXBO - 2014-03-07 3:54 PM horsefever - 2014-03-07 12:49 PM batkitty - 2014-03-07 12:45 PM If you are terminated, could your boss have done something and needed someone to blame? Then used the travel thing as an excuse? I know that's more like a soap opera but I've seen such stuff happen. Either way, many hugs and prayers. When I was hiring I would have loved to found an employee like you. Thank you for that. No update but the day is not over yet. He has not spoken a word to me.
If you value your job, go to him and tell him you will find a way to make the trip....Then do it.ย ย agreed ย Even though I value both of you guys' opinions, this time I think you're both way off. It's far different for a man to leave town without the kids, than a woman, because normally, the wife, ex, sometime girlfriend, mil, grandma, neighbor down the street that I barely know would be left in charge with them. She's stated that there's no family or close friends, so who is she supposed to leave them with?ย
Based on the dislikes, a lot of people think we're way off. LOL!
I'm not trying to be harsh or flippant.ย She's already dealing with the father splitting and searching to replaceย good employment is justย adding to her burden.ย It should be avoided right now at all cost.ย Some of the advice I'm hearing is taking quite a risk with someone else's livelyhood.ย
I was thinking this as well
Unemployment is much lower than the original salary.
I hope the email thing was just an error. However if you were told that travel was a potential part of your duties when you were hired, I *think* they could let your go legally for not being able to attend and would not need to pay your unemployment nor give you severence. If you are an at will state, they can fire you without cause at any time, though you would be privy to unemployment in that instance.
Just keep looking for a job elsewhere. Hopefully something will come up! In the meantime, I would try to not lose your current job. The job market right now is tough for office positions. |
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Cold hands and Warm Heart
      Location: oklahoma | TXBO - 2014-03-08 12:23 PM CurlyQ - 2014-03-07 7:51 PM dhdqhllc - 2014-03-07 7:38 PM TXBO - 2014-03-07 3:54 PM horsefever - 2014-03-07 12:49 PM batkitty - 2014-03-07 12:45 PM If you are terminated, could your boss have done something and needed someone to blame? Then used the travel thing as an excuse? I know that's more like a soap opera but I've seen such stuff happen. Either way, many hugs and prayers. When I was hiring I would have loved to found an employee like you. Thank you for that. No update but the day is not over yet. He has not spoken a word to me.
If you value your job, go to him and tell him you will find a way to make the trip....Then do it. agreed Even though I value both of you guys' opinions, this time I think you're both way off. It's far different for a man to leave town without the kids, than a woman, because normally, the wife, ex, sometime girlfriend, mil, grandma, neighbor down the street that I barely know would be left in charge with them. She's stated that there's no family or close friends, so who is she supposed to leave them with? Based on the dislikes, a lot of people think we're way off. LOL!
I'm not trying to be harsh or flippant. She's already dealing with the father splitting and searching to replace good employment is just adding to her burden. It should be avoided right now at all cost. Some of the advice I'm hearing is taking quite a risk with someone else's livelyhood.
I just empathize as I was once in that spot. I started landscaping on the side after working an 8 hr day to make ends meet. Seems like he could find someone else to go besides a single mother. I see your point, and agree that she should try to stick it out since she is the sole support for her family. It stinks is all :). Op, hoping everything is looking better today. |
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 Googly Goo
Posts: 7053
   
| CurlyQ - 2014-03-08 1:11 PM ...... Seems like he could find someone else to go besides a single mother. I see your point, and agree that she should try to stick it out since she is the sole support for her family. It stinks is all :).
Op, hoping everything is looking better today.
I'd have to know the nature of the meeting and her role before I could agree or disagree with you. If she's going to serve coffee to employees, I'd agree. However, the fact that he hasn't told her the purpose of the meeting could be because it's confidential at this time. Mergers, aquisitions and dispositions are at the top of the list of confidential meetings that may require the knowledge of a valued 12 year office manager..... Just for example. |
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Cold hands and Warm Heart
      Location: oklahoma | TXBO - 2014-03-08 1:48 PM
CurlyQ - 2014-03-08 1:11 PM ...... Seems like he could find someone else to go besides a single mother. I see your point, and agree that she should try to stick it out since she is the sole support for her family. It stinks is all :).
Op, hoping everything is looking better today.ย
ย I'd have to know the nature of the meeting and her role before I could agree or disagree with you.ย If she's going to serve coffee to employees, I'd agree.ย However, the fact that he hasn't told her the purpose of the meeting could be because it's confidential at this time.ย Mergers, aquisitions and dispositions are at the top of the list of confidential meetings that may require the knowledge of a valued 12 year office manager..... Just for example.
Oops, my blue collar is showing.
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10D Crack Champion
         
| Any updates? |
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 582
   
| Wow thank you all for your kind words and wisdom. I think I have smoothed things over with the boss, he contacted me yesterday. It has been a rough couple of days worrying. I will have to make the trip, and I will find a way to make sure my kids are ok. I may have them spend the night with friends of theirs while I'm gone. I really could not afford to lose this job. I I am, however, going to quietly look for another job in the meantime.
I have terrible travel anxiety too! LOL! So I may be medicated for the whole trip anyway.
Again, I appreciate so very much all of the helpful information and kind words. It has been a blessing to me.
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Hungarian Midget Woman
    Location: Midwest | horsefever - 2014-03-09 1:12 PM
Wow thank you all for your kind words and wisdom. I think I have smoothed things over with the boss, he contacted me yesterday. It has been a rough couple of days worrying. I will have to make the trip, and I will find a way to make sure my kids are ok. I may have them spend the night with friends of theirs while I'm gone. I really could not afford to lose this job. I I am, however, going to quietly look for another job in the meantime.
I have terrible travel anxiety too! LOL! So I may be medicated for the whole trip anyway.
Again, I appreciate so very much all of the helpful information and kind words. It has been a blessing to me.

Oh, I'm so glad you could work things out.
I would look for another job though (at home, workplaces monitor internet usage and can read your email too depending on the software they use).
I hope you find something soon. :) |
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  More bootie than waist!
Posts: 18425
          Location: Riding Crackhead. | I'm glad things are working out. I completely understand travel anxiety as I was horrible when my kids were small and I had to travel for my job. Now that they are 18 & 20 I enjoy getting away. LOL Where abouts are you located just in case there's a BB close by that could possibly help you out? |
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Blessed 
                      Location: Here | horsefever - 2014-03-09 1:12 PM Wow thank you all for your kind words and wisdom. I think I have smoothed things over with the boss, he contacted me yesterday. It has been a rough couple of days worrying. I will have to make the trip, and I will find a way to make sure my kids are ok. I may have them spend the night with friends of theirs while I'm gone. I really could not afford to lose this job. I I am, however, going to quietly look for another job in the meantime. I have terrible travel anxiety too! LOL! So I may be medicated for the whole trip anyway. Again, I appreciate so very much all of the helpful information and kind words. It has been a blessing to me. 
OH I am so glad you talked to him and are making the trip. Maybe the travel anxiety was overriding the other stuff a little bit too. But Yes Friends and sleep overs is a great idea! I bet the other parents won't mind helping you out! |
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Cold hands and Warm Heart
      Location: oklahoma | horsefever - 2014-03-09 1:12 PM
Wow thank you all for your kind words and wisdom. I think I have smoothed things over with the boss, he contacted me yesterday. It has been a rough couple of days worrying. I will have to make the trip, and I will find a way to make sure my kids are ok. I may have them spend the night with friends of theirs while I'm gone. I really could not afford to lose this job. I I am, however, going to quietly look for another job in the meantime.
I have terrible travel anxiety too! LOL! So I may be medicated for the whole trip anyway.
Again, I appreciate so very much all of the helpful information and kind words. It has been a blessing to me.

ย Great news! I bet your kids will have a blast. |
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 319
  
| I'm glad you've worked things out. My boss has to travel alot as part of her job. She is a single parent and her daughter is 8. It's hard for her, but part of the job & she knew this when she took it. Think quietly looking for something else is a good idea if you don't want to travel though. Good luck! |
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 The One
Posts: 7998
          Location: South Georgia | I'm glad you got things smoothed over. I would have agreed to make the trip from the start if it was emphasized as being so mandatory and necessary. 12 years is a long time to throw away, especially after a "big raise." Do what you need to do to keep your job. |
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