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 Extreme Veteran
Posts: 540
 
Location: My own little world :) | Hello all! Well I have a 7 month old and I have been trying to get my riding done and it just doesn't seem to happen. I get to ride every few days but nothing consistent. I'm starting to think I should just give horses up for a while and then start again once my baby is older..like a few years old. I have some really nice horses right now that do great with their training when I actually get to ride them but I get so frustrated that I am not being consistent with them. Currently I have a part time job, go to school online, and also have my daughter and it just doesn't seem like I can get all of my stuff done. My husband is frustrated with me and thinks I should give up school and focus on my horses and other responsibilities. I just find myself overwhelmed and discouraged. Does anyone have any tips or should I just give it up for a while? Not trying to have a pity party but its hard work! |
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| I found once my baby could walk things got so much easier for me. He can play with the dogs when we go outside, carry a coffee can for me at feed time. He loves it outside as much as his daddy and I do. He will sit in his playpen or on the roping dummy and watch me ride and he would never do that in the house! Your almost there. Just a few more months :) when my boy is old enough for a pony I don't think I will ever get him in the house again. |
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 Extreme Veteran
Posts: 357
| I have been off for 2 years now since I was pregnant and am just going to try to start back this year. Wish I had some good advise but this just worked best for me. My sister keep my horse going while I was off and fell in love with him. So I am starting back a new horse and hoping for the best.
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 Undercover Amish Mafia Member
Posts: 9991
 
Location: Kansas | Honestly....when I was super nice outside (not too hot, nor cold) I would place my daughter's pack n' play in a shady area next to the garage and I would just lope circles. My heeler always laid next to her, when she got a bit older, I placed her in her stoller. I would lope circles while she was in her stroller. She would get a kick out of it and giggle everytime I passed by the front of it. Now that she is walking, I can't keep her out of the saddle.
With time, it will get easier I promise. I have to do everything alone, I've found ways to make it work LOL. She helps me feed, groom and ride everyday |
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 Accident Prone
Posts: 22277
Location: 100 miles from Nowhere, AR | IMO, it helps to lower your expectations of yourself for a time. Your priorities necessarily change, that's part of the great journey that is parenthood. Unless you either have a ton of help from family, or sacrifice your kids on the alter of barrel racing, you will not be able to continue as you did before. It gets better, tho, I promise. Just hang in there, enjoy your baby, and ride when you can. |
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  Neat Freak
Posts: 11216
Location: Wonderful Wyoming | I hardly rode at all when my youngest was born, I worked full time. He was 3 before I was able to ride much. Then when my youngest was born I quit working and stayed home with my boys. I had a great friend come around that was wanting to learn to barrel race so she would haul to my house and the older boy would play with his dirt toys and the younger one would eat snacks and watch while we rode. She also helped me watch him at the barrel races. It's actually harder now that the younger one is nearly 2 and this year won't be so satisfied in a stroller and yet may not listen to the older one to stay out of the arena when I ride. Might have to build something with some dirt and toys in it. |
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Veteran
Posts: 234
| It will get better, but at least your husband supports your horse habit - most young mothers I know have to fight their spouses over their horses as they are a low on their list. GOOD LUCK |
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 Elite Veteran
Posts: 602
| I had to downsize my herd. Im down to one horse. I had to find that balance with work, being a parent, and a wife. As they get older it does help. I ride 3-4 days a week but I dont kill myself over it if I miss a day. Plus I set up a new barrel racing goal this year that helped reduce the stress...... I plan to run 1x per month and no more than that. That schedule fits my current life style and in 2015 I plan to change my goals again. I use to go to barrel races every weekend and ride every day..... but life has changed. I think you will figure it out. |
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Veteran
Posts: 170
| I will usually drive my car into my arena, or next to the arena with my 2 1/2 year old. I have a DVD player in the car so I will leave it running while I ride... I leave the window down so he can see me, but he's usually watching his show. I usually hand walk him around on my calm mare while she cools down, which he absolutely loves. When I saddle up or unsaddle he comes with me and usually plays with the barn cats.. When he was a lot smaller I'd put him in a stroller so that he could be in a safe spot while I tacked them/untacked them... It's never really been an issue for me I suppose! We have a good system worked out. He is now learning to STOP and WAIT when I say so, which makes it easier. I worry about him scampering around behind the horses but he has gotten much more aware. I recommend lots of core works outs for you, that was the hardest part for me getting back to competition when I felt so weak! |
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Veteran
Posts: 220
| I am in the same boat, I had to pull out of a barrel race one night because I had no help because my husband got called out. (He is a paramedic) I was hoping to get my run in before he did get a call but sure enough race starts in 5 minutes and tone goes off. That was it for me. It was a horrible stressful experience and I was like this isnt even fun anymore because I have to depend on help so many people. I decided I am just going to get off for a while and ride at home if I can. I dont get to ever really even ride and if I do I feel rushed and guilty the whole time. You are not alone. But as my daughter gets older and can play outside more I can see the light at the end of the tunnel. Oh and I work a full time job too. |
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 Elite Veteran
Posts: 1053
Location: Arizona | Where there's a will there's a way. If you want it bad enough, you will find a way to make it happen. My only advise is that this time in their lives only happens once and you don't get that time back so don't make things your kids can't be involved in a priority...like school. My kids go EVERYWHERE with me. They're now 4 and 6 but I can't tell you how many times I had to ask someone standing at the fence to watch my baby in the stroller for 20 seconds while I made my run. Now I'm hauling extra horses and the kids are riding with me. If there's not a pee wee class at the jackpot, we don't go...lol. These are the best times of our lives and I'm so happy to be able to share my love of horses with them. Don't give up! |
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I Need a Xanax!
Posts: 2774
| I don't want to be a Debbie Downer but I found it less stressful and frustrating on me when I chose to just give it up for a while. My kids are 4 and 5 and I still don't ride much. I did try to ride quite a bit when they were both smaller but it was very hard to manage and very stressful and frustrating trying to make it work alone so I gave it up. I didn't have any finished horses though so it wasn't like I could just keep one ponied with the 4 wheeler and be ready to go. I like to bring horses along in their training but that was the worst possible scenario for having 2 small kids so I gave it up. If I had of had a finished horses it would have been fairly manageable though. |
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| Lots of good advice here!! I, too, have had the same struggles as you. I have a stressful job, two kids (7 & 3), and a farm that requires a lot of time. My husband and I do most everything ourselves and rarely rely on friends/family. You have to just lower your expectations and enjoy this time with your little one. As someone said, you will never get back the time with your precious baby, but your horses will always be there. |
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Made in the USA
Posts: 1234
Location: Cecil, Pa | My baby just turned 8 months old and it is really frustrating but she is just more important I do have days where I want to go to the barn and I try once a week. I was going everyday for a few weeks because I had a goal of running in April turned out I couldnt get it done so I sent him out to be rode... It is really hard and it sounds like you have a lot on your plate I would maybe kick them out until school is finished and whatever else. Maybe just ride when you have time leisurely I know thats not what you want to hear as I would not want to either but these babies are time consuming. Im not sure how much I will ride after this deal in April we are building and with her its just hard sometimes priorities change and we are forced to put our passions aside :( |
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Elite Veteran
Posts: 1094
Location: Idahome | My question is where are the SOs? I have a daughter that will be 2 in May and as soon as I could ride again, I was. We generally turn them out for a few months in winter otherwise we are always riding. Hubby and I take turns and we make sure the other get the riding they need in. After birth, my gelding was not young but very green. I had not trouble getting him started and hauling last year with hubby's help of course. We don't have family close to us, so we rely on each other. We both work full time and manage to make it work. My daughter loves being outside with the horses and I can't wait until she wants to ride more. |
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I Need a Xanax!
Posts: 2774
| KylaKris - 2014-03-05 3:19 PM My question is where are the SOs? I have a daughter that will be 2 in May and as soon as I could ride again, I was. We generally turn them out for a few months in winter otherwise we are always riding. Hubby and I take turns and we make sure the other get the riding they need in. After birth, my gelding was not young but very green. I had not trouble getting him started and hauling last year with hubby's help of course. We don't have family close to us, so we rely on each other. We both work full time and manage to make it work. My daughter loves being outside with the horses and I can't wait until she wants to ride more.
My SO works very long hours, often out of state so he's not here much. He does this so that I can stay at home with our kids. |
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Made in the USA
Posts: 1234
Location: Cecil, Pa | Used2B - 2014-03-05 7:41 PM
KylaKris - 2014-03-05 3:19 PM My question is where are the SOs? I have a daughter that will be 2 in May and as soon as I could ride again, I was. We generally turn them out for a few months in winter otherwise we are always riding. Hubby and I take turns and we make sure the other get the riding they need in. After birth, my gelding was not young but very green. I had not trouble getting him started and hauling last year with hubby's help of course. We don't have family close to us, so we rely on each other. We both work full time and manage to make it work. My daughter loves being outside with the horses and I can't wait until she wants to ride more.
My SO works very long hours, often out of state so he's not here much. He does this so that I can stay at home with our kids.
My husband puts in long hours also he is barely home. |
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 Sock eating dog owner
Posts: 4553
Location: Where the pavement ends and the West begins Utah | Use a play pen and go ride, perhaps your hubby can take care of the baby while your working the horse. At least he is for it. Nobody here support my barrel racer and learned to ignore the opposite sex. Make it happen. If you have an indoor ride at night. |
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 Elite Veteran
Posts: 929
| I am very lucky in the fact that my husband does not WANT me to have a baby until after I take my colt to the futurities in 2017. LOL...he flat out told me, "this is your goal, you can have kids afterwards." He has a daughter from a previous marriage but she is 9 and rides around with me on her draft pony.
I adore that man.  |
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Expert
Posts: 1642
Location: Kansas | It is hard. I had a baby in 2011 and haven't been able to ride much either. I sold my prospect after I found out I was pregnant so she was just sitting and not having anything done with her. The girl that has her now has done great with her. Won buckles and running 1D/2D times with her. Glad she is doing well, but wish it were me. Hoping maybe this summer since he is older. I have 2 propsects to have started and get rode since I can't seem to sell 1 of them. It will keep me busy. Just do not give up, but put your baby first. They grow up too fast and you can't get that time back. My oldest is a SR this year and graduating in May. It is going to be hard on me. I about cry now when I think about it. Where has the time went? |
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