|
|
Elite Veteran
Posts: 1064
 
Location: Idaho | Ok I would really like some thoughts or experiences on this subject. I am 8 weeks pregnant with our first and I'm excited, scared, overwhelmed, happy, nervous, and on top of all this I have a head cold that is going to keep me up all night so I can worry about thing like this. Anyways I'm all set for my first check up next week with my OBGYN. I've had a few thoughts on looking into a midwife, but I'm having trouble finding first hand information. All I read is how bad hospitals are and this or that. I do realize this isn't for everyone, but I like to have as much control and information as I can. Thank you! | |
| | |
  Keeper of the King Snake
Posts: 7622
   
Location: Dubach, LA | You get your butt to the hospital and don't let them talk you into any of that rooming in crap. Make 'em keep the baby in the nursery. You'll need your rest. Also, avail yourself of all the luxuries of modern medicine.
Love,
Mother of 3 | |
| | |
 Expert
Posts: 1440
Location: Texas | I would never even think of having one at home. Not to scare you but if anything were to go wrong you have all of the medical personal to help you or your baby. I am a little partial as I used to work in the hospital and had to go to all high risk deliveries and would never chance my safety or my baby's safety. IMHO congrats on the news! | |
| | |
 Extreme Veteran
Posts: 365
| I would never do a home birth. My labor couldn't have been done at home. My son was 5 weeks early for one, he stopped breathing after he came out. There were several special care nurses waiting on him so they got him breathing again. Before he was out my blood pressure dropped to low, yes to low. They had to give me a shot to raise it. I had to be on oxygen for a bit. They had to give me a shot to stop contractions before this because my son was getting stressed out in there, hi heart rate going to high. He was able to be born and be healthy thanks to all the medical help waiting to help him. I was not a high risk pregnancy and was expected to make it full term until I randomly went to the hospital for pain at 32 weeks and found out I was starting to dialate and almost thinned out. Then had him at 35 weeks. My point, you never know what's going to happen. I'd rather be surrounded by medicine and plenty of knowledgable doctors/nurses just in case. | |
| | |
Veteran
Posts: 154
Location: Tennessee | I had an absolutely AMAZING experience at the hospital that I went to in Nashville, TN. Obviously you aren't able to deliver there, but not ALL hospitals are bad. I suggest doing your research. Come up with a list of questions you want to ask, and go take a tour of the L&D at a few different hospitals in your area. And ask questions!Â
My plans changed drastically once I went into labor, I had planned on having a natural birth and blah blah blah. Well I made it to 8 cm and decided the epidural was a good GREAT idea! It was nice being able to make that decision, I can't imagine being at home or somewhere else and not being able to get an epidural if you felt like you needed it.Â
Always remember do what feels right to you and makes you happy, plus keep in consideration the best interest in your baby. Pregnancy is AMAZING and seeing that baby for the first time is INDESCRIBABLE! Enjoy every second of it.....it will FLY by!
Congrats by the way!!!!! | |
| | |
 Horsey Gene Carrier
Posts: 1888
Location: LaBelle, Florida | CanCan - 2014-03-22 2:14 AM You get your butt to the hospital and don't let them talk you into any of that rooming in crap. Make 'em keep the baby in the nursery. You'll need your rest. Also, avail yourself of all the luxuries of modern medicine.
Love,
Mother of 3
DITTO
| |
| | |
 Accident Prone
Posts: 22277
Location: 100 miles from Nowhere, AR | I love the idea of homebirth, but it's a calculated risk. You can compromise with a birthing center, which is usually close to a hospital, or do what I did with my second. My first was induced with an epidural and I HATED the experience. When I got pregnant again, I decided to go a completely different direction: drug free with a doula in the hospital.
I met with my doula (she was a L and D nurse btw) every time I had a dr appt, and we went over educational stuff, what I wanted the birth to be, how to get what I wanted, what was normal labor, what could go wrong and how to handle it, teaching my husband how to help support me in my labor... She had me read lots of books--I'll look and find the names if you want. Those books were great, one was written by a midwife, the other by a LD nurse who believed in low interventions. She was with my hubby and me all through the labor and delivery, coaching, supporting, sneaking me food and drink when I wanted it. After a 12 hour labor, I delivered on a birthing stool with my dr kneeling in the floor to catch the baby. It was the most beautiful, empowering, wonderful thing I've ever done. Yes, it hurt, but not nearly as bad as the first one because I had the tools to handle it and wasn't scared to death.
I roomed-in both my babies and have no regret about it. I felt better with them there, was a nervous wreck when they were out of my sight, and IMO babies do better with as much skin to skin contact and holding as possible in the beginning. But everyone is different, you do it your way. Do what feels right to YOU and don't let someone else tell you what's best. | |
| | |
Accident Prone
Posts: 22277
Location: 100 miles from Nowhere, AR | kasaj2000 - 2014-03-22 6:40 AM CanCan - 2014-03-22 2:14 AM You get your butt to the hospital and don't let them talk you into any of that rooming in crap. Make 'em keep the baby in the nursery. You'll need your rest. Also, avail yourself of all the luxuries of modern medicine.
Love,
Mother of 3 DITTO   
Edited by Three 4 Luck 2014-03-22 7:03 AM
| |
| | |
I Really Love Jeans
Posts: 3173
Location: North Dakota | I would never deliver at home! My bladder split with my third, if I had been at home I would have bled to death. They pumped me full of so much blood and medicine. They really thought I was going to need a second surgery. Anything can happen, if you are at a hospital they can help you immediately! You can still do a natural drug free birth just do it in the hospital! | |
| | |
The Advice Guru
Posts: 6419
| In Alberta we have midwives that deliver in some hospitals, they also deliver at people's home.
As a nurse who has worked labor and delivery with both midwife and doctor. The midwife deliveries have had less complications, less tears, and better post partum care (IMO). The mothers also enjoyed their labor and birthing experience moreso with the midwife versus doctor.
I suggest if you are interested, look to see if there are any midwife birthing centres close to the hospital. See if any of your friends who live close to the hospital who would allow you to deliver in their house.
If you do go midwife go for the water birth, most women experience less pain this way.
I would keep your OBGYN just in case you have complications such as PIH, gestational diabetes, etc.
I would suggest interviewing the midwives now and find one you like, your OBGYN might also be able to give you midwife names | |
| | |
 Elite Veteran
Posts: 1118
Location: The South | Three 4 Luck - 2014-03-22 7:00 AM
 I love the idea of homebirth, but it's a calculated risk.  You can compromise with a birthing center, which is usually close to a hospital, or do what I did with my second.  My first was induced with an epidural and I HATED the experience. When I got pregnant again, I decided to go a completely different direction:  drug free with a doula in the hospital.
I met with my doula (she was a L and D nurse btw) every time I had a dr appt, and we went over educational stuff, what I wanted the birth to be, how to get what I wanted, what was normal labor, what could go wrong and how to handle it, teaching my husband how to help support me in my labor... Â She had me read lots of books--I'll look and find the names if you want. Â Those books were great, one was written by a midwife, the other by a LD nurse who believed in low interventions. Â She was with my hubby and me all through the labor and delivery, coaching, supporting, sneaking me food and drink when I wanted it. Â After a 12 hour labor, I delivered on a birthing stool with my dr kneeling in the floor to catch the baby. Â It was the most beautiful, empowering, wonderful thing I've ever done. Â Yes, it hurt, but not nearly as bad as the first one because I had the tools to handle it and wasn't scared to death.
I roomed-in both my babies and have no regret about it. Â I felt better with them there, was a nervous wreck when they were out of my sight, and IMO babies do better with as much skin to skin contact and holding as possible in the beginning. Â But everyone is different, you do it your way. Â Do what feels right to YOU and don't let someone else tell you what's best.Â
One of my college friends posted a lot on Facebook about how awesome her doula was. She said "the doula was worth the moolah" lol. OP I can't give you any opinions on anything because I don't have kiddos but I wish you the best of luck with your pregnancy and delivery! | |
| | |
 Coyote Country Queen
Posts: 5666
| I would never consider delivering at home because there are so many things that could go wrong and require immediate medical intervention. Usually when things go wrong, you don't have time to load up in the car and drive to the hospital. I can't imagine losing my baby due to something that could have been prevented. And what if something happened to me and my husband and children lost me.
I delivered in a birthing center that is next to the hospital. There was a labor and delivery room, and then we were moved to a different room where we stayed until it was time to go home. Our babies stayed in the room with us, but the nurses were more than happy to take our little ones to allow us to get some rest.
My biggest piece of advice is to be comfortable with your doctor and facility, and have a plan of what you'd like to happen but be willing to deviate from this plan if necessary. I love my doctor and felt comfortable with him. My nurses were great, and I loved the facility (went on a tour of it before delivery). I had a plan of how I'd like things to go, but when things changed with my delivery I had to be willing to change these plans.
Congratulations on your pregnancy! | |
| | |
 Can You Hear Me Now?
Location: When you hit the middle of nowhere .. Keep driving | I don't have kids and no experience in this decision, but have several friends that have had kids. Two recently had complications that could have killed them if they weren't in the hospital. 1 retained a portion of her placenta and needed surgery... the other almost bled out, crashed and needed a blood transfusion. I dont want to scare you but I wouldn't do home delivery now. That's just the moms too... Babies are a lot more fragile with a lot more risks.
Congrats on your pregnancy | |
| | |
Elite Veteran
Posts: 1064
Location: Idaho | Three 4 Luck - 2014-03-22 7:00 AM
 I love the idea of homebirth, but it's a calculated risk.  You can compromise with a birthing center, which is usually close to a hospital, or do what I did with my second.  My first was induced with an epidural and I HATED the experience. When I got pregnant again, I decided to go a completely different direction:  drug free with a doula in the hospital.
I met with my doula (she was a L and D nurse btw) every time I had a dr appt, and we went over educational stuff, what I wanted the birth to be, how to get what I wanted, what was normal labor, what could go wrong and how to handle it, teaching my husband how to help support me in my labor... Â She had me read lots of books--I'll look and find the names if you want. Â Those books were great, one was written by a midwife, the other by a LD nurse who believed in low interventions. Â She was with my hubby and me all through the labor and delivery, coaching, supporting, sneaking me food and drink when I wanted it. Â After a 12 hour labor, I delivered on a birthing stool with my dr kneeling in the floor to catch the baby. Â It was the most beautiful, empowering, wonderful thing I've ever done. Â Yes, it hurt, but not nearly as bad as the first one because I had the tools to handle it and wasn't scared to death.
I roomed-in both my babies and have no regret about it. Â I felt better with them there, was a nervous wreck when they were out of my sight, and IMO babies do better with as much skin to skin contact and holding as possible in the beginning. Â But everyone is different, you do it your way. Â Do what feels right to YOU and don't let someone else tell you what's best.Â
This is what I was hoping to hear. I'm fully aware of the things that could, will and do go wrong. If I do go this way it will be at a birthing center close to the hospital. What I am concerned with is the drugs used and what effect they have on my body and my baby and how rush rush so many people I've talked to said their experience ended up being. One thing that so far I can't disproved is the U.S has the highest rate of maturity death and the highest rate of c sections Of any other county. As silly as this sounds, I want to enjoy this.... every part of it. Of course if I'm high risk thing will change from there...thank you everyone!
| |
| | |
The Advice Guru
Posts: 6419
| CanCan - 2014-03-22 1:14 AM
 You get your butt to the hospital and don't let them talk you into any of that rooming in crap. Make 'em keep the baby in the nursery. You'll need your rest. Also, avail yourself of all the luxuries of modern medicine.Â
Love,
Mother of 3
I disagree, the research shows better milk let down, less incidence of post partum depression with rooming in.
This is your child, you choose to have said child, the child becomes your responsibility when you choose to carry child to term, it is not the nurses responsibility to care for your child for the first few days.
| |
| | |
![](<a href="http://s1191.photobucket.com/albums/z470/alicat0909/?action=view¤t=yellaandcalf.jpg" target="_blank"><img src="http://i1191.photobu) Heeler Hater
Posts: 3014
Location: Texas | Congratulations!
SO i too am 14 weeks pregnant with my first live child (one previous miscarriage) and freaked out. First settle down, you have LONG time to decide on your birth plan as I have figured out. Secondly do your research. I have gone to two doctors, and one birthing center.
I wouldn't want to have my first at home because lets face it. This is going to be hard and I WILL want to quit half way through and most people live a lot farther from a hospital.
I am about to leave my doctor and transfer all my care to a midwife at a birthing center. They are 5 minutes from a hospital where there are more midwives, doctors, and care in case of an emergency.
I personally hate doctors. They are pushy and dont listen to what you want and they try to plan your labor and birth, I.E. inducing when it isnt necessary forceps all that jazz. Yes there are times when those things are needed and I am fully prepared to accept that I may need those things. But if i dont Im not going to. They just induced my cousin and her baby was tiny and early because they were off on her due date. I want a drug free labor and birth. I want to do a water birth. They dont allow that in a hospital with a DR.
There are hospitals with midwives if you want to go more natural. Or go the medicated way. It what makes YOU feel more comfortable. I am not comfortable with some hospital taking my baby away to a nursery and bottle feeding it when I clearly have said I only want to breastfeed. I am not comfortable with laying on my back spread eagle with a doctor and 5 nurses around me. I am not comfortable with staying in a hospital for days when a birthing center sends you home the same day.
Yes im a little bit of a hippy lol but Im okay with that. I like using herbel remedies, allowing nature to take it course and let your body do whats necessary. Birthing centers you are allowed to get up and move around. THey monitor your baby and you just like in a hospital. Your allowed to eat and drink, and there is only one midwife and maybe an intern. (Remember this is with my birthing center) After the birth you get to eat a meal, they teach you how to breastfeed if thats what you want to do and then you get a warm herbal bath for you and baby and then you get to go home. Oh you have to go potty as well before they let you leave.
My mom had two hospital birth and one at a birthing center (me). I have to say a midwife is well trained. I wasnt breathing and had no heartbeat when I was born and she knew what to do. They have alternative ways to stop a hemorrhage and know when to act and get your butt to a hospital.
Please do what your most comfortable with. Some women want 20 people around them and pictures and cameras and a all that. Some want it to just be her and hubby. I am the latter. People tell me Im crazy for not wanting to be in a hospital with an epidural and its unsafe and blah blah blah. But its what Im most comfortable with, and after all im the only one doing any of the work so my opinion is the only one that matters lol!
Good luck and enjoy it!
ETA google and youtube is going to be your best friend.
Edited by Alicat0909 2014-03-22 10:42 AM
| |
| | |
Veteran
Posts: 153
| My babies are 23 months and 7 months and I had them both in the hospital. I was induced with my first one, but had I been more assure of what my body could do, I would have let her show up when she wanted. With the second one I labored at home and when the contractions got to be more than I could stand we went to the hospital. Baby boy was in a hurry had him 45 minutes later. All natural, asking for drugs the entire time but he was in too big of hurry. I will say I recovered from his birth much faster and felt better. Glad both were in the hospital.
My advice is to be in control of your decisions. Research what you want and don't want. But that being said realize no matter how planned you are things pop up and a different plan must be used. If you are determined low risk hire a midwife but I would still have the baby at the hospital. The hospital is more prepared for emergencies.
I roomed in with my babies to help my milk come in. Lots of skin to skin. But they still have to take the baby for test, so rest then. No shame in sending them to the nursery for a little while.
Congratulations and good luck! | |
| | |
 A Somebody to Everybody
Posts: 41354
Location: Under The Big Sky Of Texas | I have 2 boys, and I say go to the hospital to be on the safe side. For the babys sake anyways, you just never know what can go wrong. | |
| | |
Elite Veteran
Posts: 617
| The idea of having your child at home seems nice, but if there's complications you really don't want that stress/risk. After taking my OB class for nursing and learning all the things that can happen... its not something I would even consider. Congrats tho!!!!
Edited by cn1705 2014-03-22 12:01 PM
| |
| | |
Elite Veteran
Posts: 1064
Location: Idaho | Alicat0909 - 2014-03-22 10:34 AM
Congratulations!
SO i too am 14 weeks pregnant with my first live child (one previous miscarriage) and freaked out. First settle down, you have LONG time to decide on your birth plan as I have figured out. Secondly do your research. I have gone to two doctors, and one birthing center.
I wouldn't want to have my first at home because lets face it. This is going to be hard and I WILL want to quit half way through and most people live a lot farther from a hospital.
I am about to leave my doctor and transfer all my care to a midwife at a birthing center. They are 5 minutes from a hospital where there are more midwives, doctors, and care in case of an emergency.
I personally hate doctors. They are pushy and dont listen to what you want and they try to plan your labor and birth, I.E. inducing when it isnt necessary forceps all that jazz. Yes there are times when those things are needed and I am fully prepared to accept that I may need those things. But if i dont Im not going to. They just induced my cousin and her baby was tiny and early because they were off on her due date. I want a drug free labor and birth. I want to do a water birth. They dont allow that in a hospital with a DR.
There are hospitals with midwives if you want to go more natural. Or go the medicated way. It what makes YOU feel more comfortable. I am not comfortable with some hospital taking my baby away to a nursery and bottle feeding it when I clearly have said I only want to breastfeed. I am not comfortable with laying on my back spread eagle with a doctor and 5 nurses around me. I am not comfortable with staying in a hospital for days when a birthing center sends you home the same day.
Yes im a little bit of a hippy lol but Im okay with that. I like using herbel remedies, allowing nature to take it course and let your body do whats necessary. Birthing centers you are allowed to get up and move around. THey monitor your baby and you just like in a hospital. Your allowed to eat and drink, and there is only one midwife and maybe an intern. (Remember this is with my birthing center) After the birth you get to eat a meal, they teach you how to breastfeed if thats what you want to do and then you get a warm herbal bath for you and baby and then you get to go home. Oh you have to go potty as well before they let you leave.
My mom had two hospital birth and one at a birthing center (me). I have to say a midwife is well trained. I wasnt breathing and had no heartbeat when I was born and she knew what to do. They have alternative ways to stop a hemorrhage and know when to act and get your butt to a hospital.
Please do what your most comfortable with. Some women want 20 people around them and pictures and cameras and a all that. Some want it to just be her and hubby. I am the latter. People tell me Im crazy for not wanting to be in a hospital with an epidural and its unsafe and blah blah blah. But its what Im most comfortable with, and after all im the only one doing any of the work so my opinion is the only one that matters lol!
Good luck and enjoy it!
ETA google and youtube is going to be your best friend.
Thank you and congrats to you as well! Also thank you for wrighting down what I wanted to say! I'm a control freak and a big part of the management team on a large organic dairy. I research things to death and I'm good at sorting out the extremes. Those mamma cows are my life I feel responsible for everything we give them and how they are cared for. This is the same responsibility I feel now with my body and the baby growing inside. I feel the more correct information I gather now will help me make better decisions when the time comes! :) | |
| |
| |
Folks on-line