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 Extreme Veteran
Posts: 338
 
Location: Mississippi | To recognize they have a problem? This person is a great person when he is clean but when he is on these drugs he's violent, cruel, & reckless. He is going to end up hurting himself or even worse someone else... I'd like to help but I don't know how... |
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  Damn Yankee
Posts: 12390
 
Location: Somewhere between raising hell and Amazing Grace | You can't help someone who doesn't want to be helped. And until that person admits and owns that they have a problem, they don't want to be helped. You can pray. |
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 You get what you give
Posts: 13030
Location: Texas | IDK. we have been battling alcohol addiction with my aunt for decades. they are really good at covering things up and saying the right things… she's been on death's door and they even told her she will need a liver transplant. She was supposed to get clean and her daughters set up meetings and tried to help clean her up.. lord knows my mom has done a lot of stuff.. Last time the whole family pitched in to pay for her rehab so she could get her nursing license back. she took all the money we gave and spent it. blew off the rehab. |
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 Extreme Veteran
Posts: 492
| Unfortunately, there really isn't much you can do until he is ready for the help. The best thing you can do and the others around him is make sure you are not enabling the addiction. Many prayers for him!  |
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 More Famous than Dr Phil
| Nope... |
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 Undercover Amish Mafia Member
Posts: 9992
Location: Kansas | Only they can help themselves...... |
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Elite Veteran
Posts: 907
Location: a secret | NO and Yes depends on drugs. However, one must want to stop. Most patietns I have had to care for would not stop due to the withdrawals, it is a real concern.However, a good detox faciitly and addicition specialist and a want to it can be done. It is a long hard road to recovery it just does not end by stopping the drugs it becomes a new way of life. Prayers to you and your friend. |
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 Expert
Posts: 1440
Location: Texas | Nope, if they won't admit they have a problem then I would not hold out any hope for them to stop using. I guess theoretically if you locked them up they would have to quit but other than that I would not hold my breath. |
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 That's White "Man" to You
Posts: 5515
| I have a cousin that has been in the best rehab centers money can buy for heroin. She has been in seven times and out seven times. She is on her way back in this week. Hard to see it happen to people you are close to, but it is thier decision and no amount of money or desire for them to get better helps. But you can still be there ready to help as soon as they are ready. |
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 Elite Veteran
Posts: 617
Location: London Ontario | Nope. We are dealing with a relative with the same issue, hides it and hides it, been in and out of jail, halfway houses and rehab. Cant help them if they don't want to help themselves. In our case though they just haven't grown up. and unfortunately people keep enabling it. |
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Expert
Posts: 1477
Location: In the land of peanuts and cotton | I'm in school wanting to be a councilor either for children or substance abuse councilor. The 1st step towards recovery is admiring you have a problem. He seriously may think he doesn't have a problem. It may take something like being arrested or as bad as it sounds he may have to OD for him to realize he really does have a problem. My best friend went through this with her husband. She finally had to divorce him and completly loose contact with him before he realized that he had a problem. It may not be that he doesn't want help because really he may want help but he just thinks he doesn't need it. Until you can get him to seriously admit that there's a problem you can't do anything but pray for him. |
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 Keeper of the King Snake
Posts: 7622
Location: Dubach, LA | Nope. If there was, I'd have found it by now. |
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 Veteran
Posts: 292
Location: Northeast Nebraska | No. |
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 Expert
Posts: 4121
Location: SE Louisiana | Short answer: No
Long answer The story of my life.. |
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| Well, maybe. Depending on the case... This is what we did for my brother. Granted he was 19 at the time and still dependent on my parents. We basically did a surprise intervention on him, had most of the family there, used a counselor to aid us in the whole thing. After it was over, my parents told him that he has 3 days to decide if he wants to go to rehab and get better, or be completely cut off. They said on the 3rd day we are shutting off your phone and you have to fend for yourself. On the 2nd day he called us and we got him on a plane that night to Georgia for rehab. This was July of last year, he has left a few times, but always went back. He is now in a sober living home in Dallas and is doing great! At first his decision was based off of that there was no better choice for him, but then he realized that he actually did need the help. |
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 Ace Ventura Pet Detective
Posts: 2411
Location: Wisconsin | absolutely not!! They have to hit rock bottom before some even think about it. Got experience here with 2 of the 4 brothers. Have tried everything. If this person is violent, back off. Its like leading a horse to water and making em drink. Good Luck, and I am sorry you have to go thru this. Its always UGLY |
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Common Sense and then some
Location: So. California | He has to have a desire to change...
The best thing you can do is distance yourself and do NOT enable this person. You can tell him that you care, but that you are not willing to watch him destroy his life and slowly kill himself. Then you hold firm, do not waiver. YOU cannot fix him!
If he asks for your help, offer him a ride to the nearest 12 step meeting and drop him off. Pray for him. It's up to him to reach out and do the work to change. I wish him the courage to take that step... 
Hugs to you!! You care and it's a rough road to walk watching someone you care about go down the road of addiction. Just remember that you are not alone...  |
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The Advice Guru
Posts: 6419
| I know in Alberta you can have someone held for 14-21 days involuntarily IF THE INDIVIDUAL IS CONSIDERED A DANGER TO THEMSELVES OR OTHERS. You need to have a physician complete a specific form, the police are also given jurisdiction to do this as well.
Might be something to look into then wait till he is on the drugs if he becomes a danger, depending of your state you might be able to do something |
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 I Prefer a Beard
Posts: 1944
| I have a sibling my family has tried to help for years the short answer is no. |
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 Fact Checker
Posts: 16575
Location: Displaced Iowegian | No.....Additionally, if this person gets violent, call the cops! You can't "fix" him or make him want help but you sure as heck can protect yourself and others! |
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