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My Heelers are Heroes
Posts: 4685
   
| I am babysitting this summer for a very nice lady. Problem is she and her kid are filthy. I have never seen a house so nasty in my life and as a result it is infested with roaches. I probably kill a hundred a day. The kid is 8 and eats with his hands and spills as much as he gets in his mouth then just leaves it on the furniture and floor. Even the inside of the fridge is nasty and filthy. I just can't describe it all but it's really really bad. I've tryed to clean and washed load after load of clothes. Clothes aren't in drawers they are thrown on the floor. There is a horrible odor, I bring air freshner daily, but it doesn't kill it. I know if child services ever saw this they would yank this kid so fast. It's not healthy and he has no life skills such as eating and hygiene, he's filthy. Does not wipe his butt and he smells. I've tryed getting him to take baths every day.
i don't really want to but I'm beginning to wonder if I should report this. Would you? |
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 Twister Survivor
Posts: 1270
Location: Minnesota | Have you talked to the parent about it? I would start there, and say if you don't seen changes (BIG ones) in X amount of days youre going to be forced to report them. That is absolutely no living condition for anyone much less children. Sounds like something out of hoarders |
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 Hugs to You
Posts: 7551
Location: In The Land of Cotton | Wow. Because, I always "try" and give people the benefit of the doubt, speak to her about this situation. Tell her (if you are) willing to teach the child about cleanliness. If you get the blank stare and total rejection, call.
Some people just get lost in their own helplessness. Maybe you are their angel in disguise.
Edited by 3canstorun 2014-07-03 9:47 AM
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 Midget Lover
Location: Kentucky | Don't be so quick to assume that CPS will take her child. I would do an anonymous report and see if anything changes. I've seen some downright horrible situations (eight kids living in a 2 bedroom house, filthy, with no groceries, toilet paper, or running water) and the kids were not removed. |
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My Heelers are Heroes
Posts: 4685
| If they didn't take him they aren't doing their job. I just found a place he pooped in the floor. The floor when there is 2 working toilets.
Talking isn't going to help. At her age she knows her house is filthy. She sees the bugs. It just doesn't bother her. |
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  Warmblood with Wings
Posts: 27846
Location: Florida.. | Take photos, contact authorities, and quit. filthy house is one thing but that is pure neglect.. |
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 Undercover Amish Mafia Member
Posts: 9992
Location: Kansas | I've seen situations like this before.....if it were me, I wouldn't report the family. You know what I would do.....I would put on some rubber gloves and clean the heck out of that house. I would also speak with mom and tell her it is not okay for her to live like this, or bring a child up in a home like that.
I would help them, more than I would critize them. |
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 Money Eating Baggage Owner
Posts: 9586
Location: Phoenix | hoofs_in_motion - 2014-07-03 8:10 AM
I've seen situations like this before.....if it were me, I wouldn't report the family. You know what I would do.....I would put on some rubber gloves and clean the heck out of that house. I would also speak with mom and tell her it is not okay for her to live like this, or bring a child up in a home like that.
I would help them, more than I would critize them.
I would probably do the same thing.....like maybe kindly tell her this is NO way a child should live. But if you see her not care....report her. That's disgusting. I can't believe you've stayed. |
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 Expert
Posts: 2161
Location: NW. Florida | Talking to her is only going to cause problems between the two of you and it's not going to change a thing. Make the call. |
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 Texas Lone Star
Posts: 5318
Location: where ever my L/Q trl is parked | hammer_time - 2014-07-03 10:14 AM hoofs_in_motion - 2014-07-03 8:10 AM I've seen situations like this before.....if it were me, I wouldn't report the family. You know what I would do.....I would put on some rubber gloves and clean the heck out of that house. I would also speak with mom and tell her it is not okay for her to live like this, or bring a child up in a home like that.
I would help them, more than I would critize them. I would probably do the same thing.....like maybe kindly tell her this is NO way a child should live. But if you see her not care....report her. That's disgusting. I can't believe you've stayed.
Take photos then make the phone call to CPS or who ever one calls in this situation. I would diffinitely sterilize myself when I got home for vermits after I quit.  
Just thought of something isn't this kid in school? Should be 1st or 2nd grade. I"m sure the teacher's have notice the smell reeking from this kid- and I say this loosely. A goat probably emits a better odor. 
Edited by Aqhaczy 2014-07-03 10:53 AM
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Expert
Posts: 1226
| I agree take pictures to document. Did you know this child before the summer? Curious to know if be we to school this way. |
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| It's not a moral dilemma. It's an uncomfortable situation for you to be in but morally it's clear that something needs to be done. I don't know how old you are...an adult or a minor? If you are a minor, you need to talk to an adult in your life that could direct in the best way to get the proper people/agency involved in order to get this lady on track to taking proper care of her child. Sometimes all they need is a fire put under them and the fear of losing a child to straigten up or perhaps she's not mentally capable of understanding how "wrong" it is to have a child living under those conditions.
If push comes to shove, though, call the authorities and quit the job. At least you'll know you tried to do the right thing regardless of how it turns out. |
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 Expert
Posts: 1857
| cinch - 2014-07-03 9:57 AM
If they didn't take him they aren't doing their job. I just found a place he pooped in the floor. The floor when there is 2 working toilets.
Talking isn't going to help. At her age she knows her house is filthy. She sees the bugs. It just doesn't bother her.
He's 8 and pooped in the floor!! I hope you made him clean it up, and for that I think I would make him clean the bathrooms too..... maybe then he can remember what they are for! You should roll up your sleeves, get you some gloves, him some gloves, and you guys have a 101 on house cleaning. I'd explain to him that the way the house is, is not ok. The mother will notice, she may or may not help to keep it clean, but for the sake of that poor kid I couldn't watch him live like that. When the day comes for you to leave or you quit, I would drop a not so subtle hint that you are worried about the way they are living and she's taking care of her son and CPS may show up at her house if she's not careful. |
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 No Name Nancy
Posts: 2715
Location: never in the right place | I sure wouldn't be working there. yuck. |
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Warmblood with Wings
Posts: 27846
Location: Florida.. | It is not her responsiblity to clean the filth up.. nor show the boy how.. sometimes people need to be that caused it..if the mom had medical issues and asked for help then yes then all means help.. but not if shes perfectly capable of it..
Edited by Bibliafarm 2014-07-03 1:48 PM
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 Tough Patooty
Posts: 2615
Location: Sperry, OK | Bibliafarm - 2014-07-03 1:46 PM It is not her responsiblity to clean the filth up.. nor show the boy how.. sometimes people need to be that caused it..if the mom had medical issues and asked for help then yes then all means help.. but not if shes perfectly capable of it..
Exactly! No way in heck would I clean up that kind of filth for someone else that was perfectly capable.. and another thing.. there is NO WAY IN HELL I would stay in that house all day babysitting him. A little clutter is one thing.. even the occassional stinky trash can is okay.. but the first sight at a roach infestation to that extent... this okie would be OUT!!! They get on you and in your stuff, then you take them home.. they probably have bed bugs too! Now I need a bath just talking about it... ICK! |
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Elite Veteran
Posts: 1079
| I too want to know how this boy's appearance/smell haven't caught the attention of teachers? Also, this mom is obviously paying you to babysit on the regular - so does that mean she works? How can she hold down a job being so filthy and obviously irresponsible?
Seems strange to have the luxury of an inhome baby sitter (daily? very often at least) and yet be living in such extreme poverty.
No matter this all sounds beyond disgusting and I'd be freaking out on somebody. |
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 The Bling Princess
Posts: 3411
Location: North Dakota | Cleaning it up for her is a short term solution, to what is more than likely, a long term problem. Aren't people in "care giving" roles mandated reporters? I wouldn't be waiting another second to report this situation to the authorites. I agree with whomever said this was a case of neglect. |
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 448
Location: lone star state | I also would try to help this family and document and photograph before reporting. CPS will not remove for filth unless they have worked with the family numerous times. Often the home the child is removed from is better than where they are placed by the state.
Do you see physical problems with the child caused by the filth for example lice or skin sores? Are mom and child well bonded to each other or does mom neglect emotional needs of child as well? CPS is very far from what most people think of who live in sheltered utopia. Most often children are better off in the family home where they are loved and bonded with their caregiver than in a foster home or shelter. Unless you see physical or sexual abuse give this mom a chance to clean up her home with assistance and direction. |
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Warmblood with Wings
Posts: 27846
Location: Florida.. | firewaterfuelsme - 2014-07-03 3:27 PM I also would try to help this family and document and photograph before reporting. CPS will not remove for filth unless they have worked with the family numerous times. Often the home the child is removed from is better than where they are placed by the state. Do you see physical problems with the child caused by the filth for example lice or skin sores? Are mom and child well bonded to each other or does mom neglect emotional needs of child as well? CPS is very far from what most people think of who live in sheltered utopia. Most often children are better off in the family home where they are loved and bonded with their caregiver than in a foster home or shelter. Unless you see physical or sexual abuse give this mom a chance to clean up her home with assistance and direction.
if hes pooping on the floor there are issues.. hes 8.. neglect, abuse, attention, medical needs, mental needs.. someone needs to step in |
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