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Posts: 13
| I have made the decision over the past couple weeks to get out of horses. My depression has taken a turn for the worst and they have become more of a chore to me than my "happy place." This is something I never thought would happen to me, but it did. Back in August I found out that my good barrel horse had managed to injure both hind suspensory ligaments and we had the three options... stall rest, prp/steriod injections/light therapy or operation. I decided to do stall rest and then find out if she's improved after a few months and go from there. It's now the end of december and she has come up with a limp on the worse of the two limbs within the past couple days. I'm gonna call after the first and try to get her in with the vet and see what's going on. She's grade and has run 1D/2D consistently at our local NBHA/IBRA shows since I've had her. She has a minor club foot that causes her no lameness just as long as she's balanced. But like I said, she's grade, so hopefully nobody would think about breeding her to begin with. She's twelve.
I just don't know how to go about this. I physically and mentally cannot motivate myself anymore. They get fed and watered adequately.. but nobody gets ridden and it all seems like a chore. It breaks my heart to be in this position.. but I know what has to be done. My horses need to be with somebody who actually has the motivation to take them to their fullest potential. I know that I am not going to get anything out of my barrel horse. I just don't know how to go about rehoming her. I'm not someone to lie to someone about the condition she's in.. I just haven't been in this situation before and I'm clueless.
I have other horses too that I can just sell. No serious issues or anything.. but I'm stuck on this mare. Anyone have any advice at all? I'm confused  |
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 Take a Picture
Posts: 12842
   
| When horses aren't fun any more it is time to make a change. Maybe a break for awhile and when you feel like getting back into horses find one that fits your needs. If you have several horses it can be a lot of work and on nights like tonight it isn't much fun to get out there and take care of them. Good luck |
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Elite Veteran
Posts: 777
Location: South Texas | I have no advice, but prayers you come up with a solution to your dilemma. |
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 Expert
Posts: 1718
Location: Southeast Louisiana | Let everyone know at your local barrel race (where they know she's a good horse) that you're trying to find her a good home. Do you think she will ever be sound? There might be someone willing to take a chance on her if she just needs time and maybe some corrective shoeing. Especially if she might make a kid's horse.
Otherwise, she will just be a pasture ornament. Which isn't a bad thing. If that's the case, you might want to just keep her and turn her out and let her retire if you can. |
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Member
Posts: 13
| This is probably what I'm going to have to do. It's just a very disheartening feeling. Maybe one day when I have myself pulled together I can find another one as awesome as she was. But only time will tell. |
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Member
Posts: 13
| Thanks so much for the prayers.. It's much appreciated and they are needed  |
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Expert
Posts: 2685
| Much prayers and hugs for you. I agree that when it is no longer a positive in your life, its probably best to step back and take a break. I understand how disheartening it is to have your good horse, your pride and joy, lame. I think I agree with maybe turning her out at your place and letting her live like a horse with you and selling the others. That way you know she is getting the retirement she deserves and heck, maybe in 6mos or a year, once she's healed up you'll want to go at it again. Time heals a lot. Physical and mental. |
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  Angel in a Sorrel Coat
Posts: 16030
Location: In a happy place |  This is a good idea considering your depression. Take a break. |
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 464
| I will pray for you as well. You know, God understands sadness. It's a safe bet, that God has experienced it many times. Just because you are sad, doesn't make any less of a person. You are just a human being experiencing an earthly emotion. Only you know what your needs are, and I want try and tell you what to do. For myself, I recently had a bout with depression. I dealt with it by shutting down. I personally ended up more depressed. |
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 Veteran
Posts: 246
Location: Idaho | Maybe your depression is providing your horse with the break she needs. Depression is very difficult. But if horses are part of who you are gettin rid of them will not help. Instead, it may make it worse because there is nothing depending on you, to force you to get out of bed and take care of them. Have you spoken with a doctor about your depression? Sometimes medication is the answer if your depressions is that bad. Its not always something you need longterm but sometimes its just enough to get your mind right and help you get back to enjoying. My personal opinion, for what its worth, is that this is a time to work on yourself and get other things in your life in order and get yourself back to happy. It sounds like your horse needs the break too. Look to God for guidance. He is always the way when you are lost. When you feel down, just look up! :) |
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 Elite Veteran
Posts: 920
| How many do you have? What about cutting back to one? Sometimes though stepping back or a bit I the best you can do. Evaluate were your at and what needs to change maybe. Horses cause just as much stress as much joy as the bring. Good luck with you decision. |
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 Expert
Posts: 1302
Location: California | I was at that exact same point a couple months ago. I had one horse who I paid a lot of money for but just can't figure out, one who loves and works for me but NO one else, and one who is a stud but has a lot of meaning to me. I was so stressed just trying to feed them let alone be able to haul and compete on any. I decided I needed a break emotionally and financially. I sold one very easily because I just sold him for a low price, went to sell my stud who was boarded about 40 minutes from my house and found him skin and bones and sick as could be so he went to the vet for a few weeks and then got turned out to pasture. The barrel horse I sent to a trainer to try and sell and have ended up spending a ton in training and he isn't selling. I sold my truck. It's been two months and I miss it like crazy already. I think I will wait until spring/summer to get back into it but the biggest thing I did was leave the option for me to get back into it without a huge financial strain. I wish you the best and get it completely. |
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 Veteran
Posts: 149
Location: Mississippi | No advice but I agree take a break and when the time is right you can get another one. Prayers for you |
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Member
Posts: 13
| Thank you, everyone. I'm going to put shoes on my retired mare (still good for trails, just no barrels) and sell the pony I had. I'm gonna let my girl out onto pasture and let her roam. She may heal, she may not.. but at least she won't be cooped up in a stall and be unhappy. I might keep my two year old and start hauling him some after he turns 3 this spring. Just see how it works for me... If it's no better then we'll go from there.
I've never NOT had a horse and it's such a painful thing to think about. I'll just turn my two out and it'll give my baby some time to mature and my mare some freedom. Thank you all for the prayers. All your kind words are appreciated (: |
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 I Don't Brag
Posts: 6960
| I'd give yourself a break but personally advise against getting out completely. I have been fighting a lack of motivation and a sort of depression after having to keep 7-8 horses legged up for year after year. 3 to 4 of them were mine and 4 were hubby's pickup horses (hubby is an OTR truck driver so could not keep his own horses ridden). Near the end of that I paid a lot of money (for me) for a coming 4 yr old that was to be the last hurrah for an aging barrel racer.
That mare sucked what remaining life and motivation I had left in me. I spent 9 years trying to get and keep her sound enough to compete on and I got 2 half summers out of her. I finally broke down and gave up on her.....best thing I could have done for BOTH of us. I no longer dread going to the barn just to find out what is wrong with her today, and she gets a fresh start with someone who doesn't have a bad history with her. Don't get me wrong, she is a wonderful, talented mare, but 6 years of fighting her ovaries just plain wore me down, and I HATE to give up!
So I have been trying to get back to enjoy barrel horse to playing my horses. Hauling to parks to trail ride with friends, going roping practice with my coming barrel horse to play in the roping chute and chase some calves AND the biggest pick me up was the 19 yr old mare that was given to me (because I take such good care of my horses??) and I actually got to GO to some rodeos, place a little and just plain have fun. There are times I have to MAKE myself go somewhere to ride, but I am usually glad that I did.
I hope that you find a way to pull yourself out of this depression you find yourself in...maybe seek some medical/professional help? But if you are anything like me, selling ALL of your horses will lead to hiding in the house and becoming even MORE depressed. Get the number of horses down to a manageable number, maybe just feed that crippled barrel horse for awhile, giving it a chance to heal, and just let them eat for awhile. Then find something fun to do with them instead of feeling like you HAVE to do something with them.
Hugs and prayers to you and hope you find yourself in a better place soon! |
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 Veteran
Posts: 254
Location: Ft Worth TX via California | I am going throught the same dilemma, just got back from the trainers and need to quit paying money I do not have.
I am 57 have had horses my whole life and moved to Tx 8 years ago and dealt with bad boarding, lamenesses the death of my horse of a lifetime. I've had the stress, and emotional drain on where to keep my horses where they will be treated as their own.
I work so much I have no time to ride, then have no one to ride with the one day I can.
Thinking it is time to sell everything, truck, trailer horses.
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 Twin Sister to Queen Boobie
Posts: 13315
Location: East Tennessee but who knows?! | Prayers & hugs for you.
I only have to add that there's NO reason to feel guilty for letting one sit in a pasture unused. Nothing wrong with that. I think we have a tendency to be judgemental about that in the horse world and think horses and us both have to be doing something all the time. But in the big scheme of things, what does it really matter if they're sitting as long as they're being fed and they're healthy? They never forget what they learn. So unless you're too overwhelmed, don't think you have to sell. Even if they sat for a couple of years, it's not the end of the world for you or for them. |
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Expert
Posts: 1314
Location: North Central Iowa Land of white frozen grass | When the last of my 2 daughters went to college I felt relieved that we were not on the road every weekend. We basically let the horses sit in the pasture for 8 years before someone got on one again. Now that they are getting settled into their lives we are starting to leg up some new horses. Sometimes life just gets in the way for awhile and we all have to quit for awhile. But I will tell you that first time I got back on one after all those years the fun factors was back. But now I can have just as much fun trail riding as we did running the jackpot circut. I think that we all think that we are the only ones with health issues with horses. I think that the big rodeo people just don't keep horses that can't cut it. Its just business for them and not the emotional ty like we have to a horse. |
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 pressure dripper
Posts: 8699
Location: the end of the rainbow | royal3tfarms - 2014-12-28 4:27 PM Thank you, everyone. I'm going to put shoes on my retired mare (still good for trails, just no barrels) and sell the pony I had. I'm gonna let my girl out onto pasture and let her roam. She may heal, she may not.. but at least she won't be cooped up in a stall and be unhappy. I might keep my two year old and start hauling him some after he turns 3 this spring. Just see how it works for me... If it's no better then we'll go from there. I've never NOT had a horse and it's such a painful thing to think about. I'll just turn my two out and it'll give my baby some time to mature and my mare some freedom. Thank you all for the prayers. All your kind words are appreciated (:
This sounds like a great answer. If you have the access to pasture it sure won't hurt anything to turn her out. Sell off the horses you can or don't mind parting with, just to relieve yourself of that stress. Many prayers for you my friend. The whole depression thing is so hard. Winters are always a little tough for me. |
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