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 Undercover Amish Mafia Member
Posts: 9991
    
Location: Kansas | I hate having to post this, but I'm an emotional wreck right now. My ex (boyfriend), who is my daughters father....is taking me to court over a trailer that was registered in my name. Trailer was bought together yes, there was never a lien on it, when we split up he told me I could have the trailer....his never was on that title, ever. I was the one who paid the registration on the trailer, etc. A month after I was allowed to keep the trailer....he states I stole the trailer from him. He gets in touch with an attorney, who is attempting to work the case as if we were married, and we never were...not even common law. The relationship was under 2 years.
I retained an attorney showed him the previous copy of the title which showed the seller signature, and only MY signature and address on the back of the title, I also gave him a copy of the current title registered in my name. Now my daughters father states he has a bill of sale.....which he does, but the kicker is....nothing on that bill of sale matches anything on the title of the trailer....It stated it was a 1994 four star and no VIN number was even listed on the bill of sale. My title stated 1993 Five, I even paid to have the trailer inspected by highway patrol since it had an out of state title.
I met with him yesterday to pick up my daughter and everything hit the fan. Thankfully I was recording, but he screamed at me in front of my child (his mother was with him and did the same). He stated he is going to see me in court regarding "HIS" trailer and that I'm screwed because apparently they are having the dealership who the trailer was purchased from, come and testify in court. Mind you, we don't even have a court date set up........
What can I do? I've about had it with his harassment, and every little thing that happens...he screams at me that he is going to report me or tell the judge.
Edited by hoofs_in_motion 2015-01-12 9:58 AM
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 Cute Little Imp
Posts: 2747
Location: N Texas | Let him take you to court, he's SOL. The trailer is in your name, so he doesn't have a leg to stand on.
ETA: or you could tell him to buy out your half (or however much you paid) and let him have the trailer so he'll leave you alone.
Edited by Gunner11 2015-01-12 10:01 AM
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Undercover Amish Mafia Member
Posts: 9991
Location: Kansas | The thing is, I want him to take me to court....but his attorney keeps dragging it out further and further so we don't have to go to court. They want me to settle and pay half the cost of the trailer....as well as pay off 2 of his credit cards that my name isn't on. |
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  Warmblood with Wings
Posts: 27846
Location: Florida.. | ignore him. when you exchange child meet in public place its sad but you gotta do what you gotta do.Id just continue living your life. hes SOL on ALL accounts if he didnt pay for it. if he did pay though ,you owe him.Legally there might not be anything he can do but Morally if he paid then you owe IMHO. but thats how I am.
tell him talk to your attorney not you. and walk away. dont say anything to him.
hes mad . he cant do anything about it.
Edited by Bibliafarm 2015-01-12 10:08 AM
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 I Chore in Chucks
Posts: 2882
Location: MD | I see why he's an ex. He sounds emotionally abusive and can't seem to handle his own emotions on top of it. I would question his ability to handle a small child without supervision with that sort of behavior. I understand in these sort of situations emotions run high, but he's got to be able to get it under control at LEAST in front of your daughter.
The trailer is in your name, regardless of who paid, it's your trailer. If he paid for part of it initially he should have put it in both of your names. Bring receipts of the trailer maintenance, inspections, and your title for whenever that court date rolls around. I'd really truly doubt a judge would rule in his favor. I would also bet that he is trying to manipulate you to get the trailer without having to go to court.
Best of luck to you, don't let him stress you. |
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Undercover Amish Mafia Member
Posts: 9991
Location: Kansas | we do meet at a public place, the same place everytime for pick up and drop off. At this point, I'm not meeting him any longer, my mother said she would pick up/drop off my child because he refuses to be civil....even accuses me of facebook stalking him (which how can I since he blocked me LOL), and states that "we are over, and you just have to get over that"
I left him....not he left me, so I don't understand where he is getting that idea. |
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Cute Little Imp
Posts: 2747
Location: N Texas | hoofs_in_motion - 2015-01-12 10:01 AM
The thing is, I want him to take me to court....but his attorney keeps dragging it out further and further so we don't have to go to court. They want me to settle and pay half the cost of the trailer....as well as pay off 2 of his credit cards that my name isn't on.
Pay off two of his credit cards?? That's ridiculous. Unless he can prove those cards are for expenses for you.
I bet they're dragging it out because they know he'll get nothing if it goes to court. Don't let them bully you into doing something you're not comfortable with. If you want to buy your part of the trailer, then do it. If not, stand firm and force him to actually take you to court. |
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Undercover Amish Mafia Member
Posts: 9991
Location: Kansas | Crowned Image - 2015-01-12 10:07 AM I see why he's an ex. He sounds emotionally abusive and can't seem to handle his own emotions on top of it. I would question his ability to handle a small child without supervision with that sort of behavior. I understand in these sort of situations emotions run high, but he's got to be able to get it under control at LEAST in front of your daughter.
The trailer is in your name, regardless of who paid, it's your trailer. If he paid for part of it initially he should have put it in both of your names. Bring receipts of the trailer maintenance, inspections, and your title for whenever that court date rolls around. I'd really truly doubt a judge would rule in his favor. I would also bet that he is trying to manipulate you to get the trailer without having to go to court.
Best of luck to you, don't let him stress you.
He was physically abusive as well.....unfortunately, there is honestly nothing I can do when it comes to him doing that around my child. She has come home saying some nasty little words...and even then, nothing was ever done. So I know I'm SOL on that aspect, so I don't even bother trying to say anything when she acts out. I just tell her I love her and we don't say naughty words, and her attitude from his home is down right horrible. |
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Warmblood with Wings
Posts: 27846
Location: Florida.. | can you go talk to someone and lay everything out on table. a attorney or a officer and see advise from them? sad your daughter is having to be with him if hes abusive and has anger issues. |
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Undercover Amish Mafia Member
Posts: 9991
Location: Kansas | Gunner11 - 2015-01-12 10:09 AM hoofs_in_motion - 2015-01-12 10:01 AM The thing is, I want him to take me to court....but his attorney keeps dragging it out further and further so we don't have to go to court. They want me to settle and pay half the cost of the trailer....as well as pay off 2 of his credit cards that my name isn't on. Pay off two of his credit cards?? That's ridiculous. Unless he can prove those cards are for expenses for you. I bet they're dragging it out because they know he'll get nothing if it goes to court. Don't let them bully you into doing something you're not comfortable with. If you want to buy your part of the trailer, then do it. If not, stand firm and force him to actually take you to court.
one of the cards he put $500 towards a car repair I had, so yes I know I'm obligated to that...and even told my attorney I have no issue with paying that....but the funny thing is, he had an outstand balance on that card already from having to buy new tires. It was paid down to like $489...then my $500 was added, but he won't allow me to pay on the card directly because he won't give me access to just pay on it. So right now, that card is over $1,289....and his minimum payment per month is $249 because he is only paying $30 on it per month. And he wants me to pay the card completely off.
Now the other card, nothing on that card links to me. |
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 Elite Veteran
Posts: 823
Location: East Texas | Did he pay for the trailer? You said it was paid for together. If so, give him the money that he paid back and you will come out looking good and can move on. |
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Go Get Em!
Posts: 13503
Location: OH. IO | Give him nothing or he will continue to bully you.I highly doubt the trailer place will waist their time.calm down but be tough! |
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 Elite Veteran
Posts: 1182
Location: Do I hear Banjos? |
Well...if you two bought the trailer together...married or not...when you split you guys should have either sold the trailer and divided the proceeds or bought the other out on their 1/2. If he said you could keep it...and you didn't get that in writing...well...that's not good. It's He said She said.
Is he looking at the credit card bills as joint household expenses? (I assume you were living together as a family?).
Regardless as to who is standing on the moral high ground as far as right and wrong of who owes what....he is absolutely wrong for losing his temper and making accusations/threats in front of the little girl (or at all really since he should be an adult period)
Is he required to pay child support for the daughter? (by a court decision I mean...something official?) Maybe that is part of his ire. He may see that child support payment as all you should get...and that if he sees that credit card bill as joint bills and the trailer as a joint asset...well...maybe that is where all of this is coming from.
You may not have had a piece of paper formalizing your union...but if you lived together and had a child together...it's really just semantics isn't it?
It's a shame lawyers got involved...they will be the real winners in the end. |
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Tried and True
Posts: 21185
Location: Where I am happiest | Give him the $500 you owe on the credit card. Give it in the form of a postal money order and make him sign a reciept for it. Then that one is out of the way and you have iron clad proof of payment and make sure you put in the notes what it's for. If someone else is delivering your daughter to him they can facilitate the delivery of the money order and signing of the reciept. Is he paying child support? If he is harrassing you, and has been abusive you might think about a restraining order. Has he ever been abusive towards your daughter? |
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Undercover Amish Mafia Member
Posts: 9991
Location: Kansas | ThreeCorners - 2015-01-12 10:41 AM Give him the $500 you owe on the credit card. Give it in the form of a postal money order and make him sign a reciept for it. Then that one is out of the way and you have iron clad proof of payment and make sure you put in the notes what it's for. If someone else is delivering your daughter to him they can facilitate the delivery of the money order and signing of the reciept. Is he paying child support? If he is harrassing you, and has been abusive you might think about a restraining order. Has he ever been abusive towards your daughter?
I will get a certified bank check and just get it over with, and that way I will have proof that I paid him luckily. My mom can give him the check when she drops her off. He is suppose to pay a certain amount of child support per month, but he only pays half of what is owed....which is fine, financially it is taking a hit to my paychecks, but I would rather go knowing that I'm taking care of my child. So right now there is back child support owed at over $1,200 from just 6 months.
I spoke with another BB and I'm going to speak with a friend who is a police officer and see what he thinks I should do. i'm going to show him the video as well.
I cant accuse him of ever being abusive around her, because she is a typical 2 year old.....bumps, bruises, scrapes, it happens. I do know he got very upset at me because she told him to "leave her alone," so upset he threatened to call the daycare because he felt she was "acting up" I even told him she is 2 and she is currently going through a stage, I have no control over it....but still continued to throw it back in my face.
At this point, I don't even want to have to deal with him. We have to sit down for concilliation, and I'm honestly dreading it at this point. |
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 Fact Checker
Posts: 16572
Location: Displaced Iowegian | ThreeCorners - 2015-01-12 10:41 AM Give him the $500 you owe on the credit card. Give it in the form of a postal money order and make him sign a reciept for it. Then that one is out of the way and you have iron clad proof of payment and make sure you put in the notes what it's for. If someone else is delivering your daughter to him they can facilitate the delivery of the money order and signing of the reciept. Is he paying child support? If he is harrassing you, and has been abusive you might think about a restraining order. Has he ever been abusive towards your daughter?
NO....do NOT do this.....at this point in time, ALL transactions, etc should be done through YOUR lawyer. He will put the money into an "escrow" account to be paid out at the time of resolution of the case. Additionally, find any and all paperwork (checks or receipts of money paid, repairs, licensing, etc) that you have paid out for the trailer. Since it is in your name, I highly doubt that the courts will give him anything unless he can PROVE that he paid a certain amount. If they do, they will deduct your monetary contributions. |
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 Damn Yankee
Posts: 12390
Location: Somewhere between raising hell and Amazing Grace | Who actually paid money for the trailer? If he put his own money into it, then I think he's owed that money. However, I believe it is in your best interest to let this get settled in court or through a lawyer. Don't just go giving him money. Not for the trailer, not for anything. And I don't care how ugly he and his mother get. YOU need to be the bigger person, be nice, be civil. You can no longer just do whatever you want to do about anything. You kind of gave up that right when you become a mom. You need to do whatever is best for your child, which is never getting into a battle with her father in front of her. Shame on him for doing that to her.
Do YOU have an attorney? If not, get one. Every state, jurisdiction is different. Only an attorney in your area will have the best legal advice. |
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 Expert
Posts: 1857
| It was a gift! That's all you have to say! It's in your name, he gifted it to you... end of story! My MIL got scammed that way. a quarter of a million dollars!
Edited by FlyingJT 2015-01-12 11:23 AM
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Expert
Posts: 1857
| hoofs_in_motion - 2015-01-12 10:14 AM
Gunner11 - 2015-01-12 10:09 AM hoofs_in_motion - 2015-01-12 10:01 AM The thing is, I want him to take me to court....but his attorney keeps dragging it out further and further so we don't have to go to court. They want me to settle and pay half the cost of the trailer....as well as pay off 2 of his credit cards that my name isn't on. Pay off two of his credit cards?? That's ridiculous. Unless he can prove those cards are for expenses for you. I bet they're dragging it out because they know he'll get nothing if it goes to court. Don't let them bully you into doing something you're not comfortable with. If you want to buy your part of the trailer, then do it. If not, stand firm and force him to actually take you to court.
Now the other card, nothing on that card links to me.
The repair was a gift to you, you are not obligated to pay it back.... don't negotiate, make him take you to court! |
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The Advice Guru
Posts: 6419
| As already said do not pay him anything. Let your lawyer handle everything.
Concerning your daughter you need to get a different lawyer one who is good with custody as if he isn't paying you what the court has ordered you need to go after him for this.
Also next time your daughter is scheduled to come him have an assessment by a child psychiatrist/psychologist done. Emotional abuse, neglect, verbal abuse are all abuse and your child may be acting out due to this. Depending on the assessment you may be able to stop visitation due to imminent harm.
Again you have two different things going on, I suggest getting the best lawyers for both don't use the same one.
Also speak to your lawyer and ensure you were not living in common law and see what your lawyer recommends |
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