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 Don't Wanna Make This Awkward
Posts: 3106
  
Location: Texas | I've talked about this several times on here that I'm gonna be getting out of horses for awhile to focus on school and my career... So hypothetical think of this as life without horses.
My dream schools were Columbia and NYU because I really wanted to be in NYC.. I'm finishing my first year up at a junior college here in texas and will take fall classes online through a comunity college here. I found a school in New York that is actually reasonable for me to attend, this would be Spring 2016.
I'm young and single and have no commitments holding me down. The only problem is I really love my family. As bad as things are sometimes we are really close and I spend a lot of time at home. I'm afraid of moving and not being able to make friends and feeling alone, but at the other time I want to push myself and there's the "you'll never know unless you try" quote. I guess i'm really just trying to figure out if it's worth the risk.
Does anyone else have any stories about moving away after high school or college? Would you do it again? How do you handle not making friends quickly? I don't want a roommate but I feel that might be a good way to find a friend? Any advice? I know this isn't horse related at all, but i've grown so much from the advice I've been given on here over the years, you guys always seem to guide me in the right direction(or atleast I feel that way) thank you!  |
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 Tried and True
Posts: 21185
 
Location: Where I am happiest | Go for it! Just because you move in a different direction and location doesnt mean you delete your family. They are just a phone call away no matter where you are and you can always go visit. Follow your dreams and goals. Now is the time to do it being foot lose and free without anything or anyone holding you down. If you dont do it now, you may never have the opportunity again. Dont let fear of the unknown keep you in the nest. Spread your wings and fly. |
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What Name?
Posts: 1994
| outrundaizy - 2015-04-02 1:29 AM I've talked about this several times on here that I'm gonna be getting out of horses for awhile to focus on school and my career... So hypothetical think of this as life without horses.
My dream schools were Columbia and NYU because I really wanted to be in NYC.. I'm finishing my first year up at a junior college here in texas and will take fall classes online through a comunity college here. I found a school in New York that is actually reasonable for me to attend, this would be Spring 2016.
I'm young and single and have no commitments holding me down. The only problem is I really love my family. As bad as things are sometimes we are really close and I spend a lot of time at home. I'm afraid of moving and not being able to make friends and feeling alone, but at the other time I want to push myself and there's the "you'll never know unless you try" quote. I guess i'm really just trying to figure out if it's worth the risk.
Does anyone else have any stories about moving away after high school or college? Would you do it again? How do you handle not making friends quickly? I don't want a roommate but I feel that might be a good way to find a friend? Any advice? I know this isn't horse related at all, but i've grown so much from the advice I've been given on here over the years, you guys always seem to guide me in the right direction(or atleast I feel that way) thank you!
I can personally tell you, because I am currently in the process of doing this, that you'll regret it if you don't. But always do it for you, and your reasons. =)
I have lived with/around my family my entire life. But after next year, I'm transferring from a local two year to a four year in North Carolina and interning there as well. Baby birds gotta spread their wings. If I want to visit nothing is stopping me. =) But I am personally taking my horse, but then I probably wont be competing on him. He and my dog will be my little piece of home away from home. I'll be interning in a Zoo though, and they have a barn in their petting zoo that I'll be able to stall Bug at and areas behind the scenes for me to work him at.
Good luck! It's defintely worth it and exciting. You'll regret doing the "small town" thing your entire life and never stretching out. Go finish college, explore, branch out. You can always go home and visit and they can come up there. I told my mom and friends they have to come stay with me and we'll go to the beach!  |
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 372
| if it's what you want to do, and you can swing it financially do it.
Look at it as an adventure, something that no matter how old you are no one can take away from you.
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 Veteran
Posts: 178
| Where in NY besides NYU are you looking?
I live here, and really regret never leaving. Do it now while you can. Everything will fall into place. Worst case scenario? You can go back! |
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 Party Girl
Posts: 12293
Location: Buffalo, Wyoming | Do it! You will have no regrets!
I am VERY close to my family and lived at home until I was 24. I packed up everything and moved to Texas and have not had one regret about it. It made me a stronger more independent person. I have met some great people along the way and have got to see some things I never would have if I wouldn't have gone. I have lived in 4 different states since I moved out 6 years ago. I don't think I could ever move back to Utah but I would like to be somewhat closer to my family now that I am thinking about starting my own. |
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 Expert
Posts: 1432
Location: Never in one place long | I know you have mixed feelings but you REALLY REALLY need to do this for yourself, if it's a dream, DO IT! You will NOT ever regret it! Five years ago I moved away from my family (my husband and I) and it's been 5 of the best years of my life, I have grown so much as an individual, met SO many amazing friends (it does take time and patience) and have seen so many things and had so many wonderful experiences I'd of never had if I'd of stayed in my hometown. It'll change you forever, broaden your horizons and you can ALWAYS go home but once you have committments, it can be hard to live out your dreams so go for it NOW! PM me if you want to chat! Good luck on your new adventure!! |
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 Extreme Veteran
Posts: 425
Location: California | Do it, whether it's for school or just to go see different places. Trust me. I wanted so badly to leave Cali for so many different reasons. Well I never did, & now I'm Not single and have A LOT keeping me here now. But I still always wonder what things would be like if I would have just gone!
The good thing is, you can always go back!
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 Shipwrecked and Flat Out Zapped
Posts: 16390
Location: DUMPING CATS AND PIGS IN TEXAS :) | I moved out and joined the Air Force right out of high school. Then, lived in Savannah, GA years after getting out of the military. I will never regret it. I loved it. BUT, if I hadn't had the Air Force taking care of me financially, I wouldn't have made it. In GA, I had to work a lot to make it work. I went to college, but struggled financially ALL THE TIME. New York is not cheap. It's not even close to cheap. So, I say do it, have fun, but ONLY if you can afford it. |
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 Shelter Dog Lover
Posts: 10277
| Now is the time to do it, before you have obligations that prevent you from moving. Nothing is permanent, if you don't like it, you can always move back. My daughter moved from Houston to Denver, for her first job, she was there 2 years then transferred to Phoenix for one year. She need not know a single person in either city but through meet up groups and joining a gym was able to make friends. She had to make the effort to get out there and meet people but she had no problems asjusting. She just moved back to Houston but does not regret at all the opportunity to live in other parts of our great country. Life is an adventure- live it!
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 Warmblood with Wings
Posts: 27846
Location: Florida.. | The door is always open to go home if needed..follow those dreams! |
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Rad Dork
Posts: 5218
Location: Oklahoma | I am going to live vicariously thru you and tell you to DO IT!!! (and then I can come visit you in NYC  )
I wanted to do what you're doing, but already had three years invested into my boyfriend (now husband) and he was worth more to me than packing up and moving. (I also was also on a hiatus from horses at the time.) If I was to go back in time and be single during the period that you're at then I would do it in a heartbeat. You either love NYC or loathe it.. and I think you either want to be there 24/7 or never again.
As long as you're attending school or working (i.e. not just being a hermit in your apartment) I would think you could make friends pretty easily. A roommate would certainly help with expenses, but if you think you could be comfortable making it by yourself then that's what I would go for... but I do better independently than having someone else around most of the time.
Good luck!! I'm extremely excited for you!!
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boon
Posts: 3
| You need to do it...I would go so that I could take the classes up there and not wait till spring. You have time now to get everything situated...are you in classes now? What would you have to take care of here before you could go? Write down your goals and make it happen...no regrets! |
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The Advice Guru
Posts: 6419
| Have you spoke to your parents about withdrawing from 2 courses, and wanting to relocate?
Due to you having difficulty with the junior college, my concerns would be will you be able to focus?
The part of your comments that concern me is, you are worried about making friends, this shouldn't be a priority, your priority should be school, when I was in university I didn't have time to socialize, I went to class and studied after.
I honestly have mixed thoughts about you going, part of me says you being on foreign land, may push you to take school more seriously, the other part of me says due to previous information you will struggle.
Also New York does get snow, cold and ice, how will you cope with this?
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 Owner of a ratting catting machine
Posts: 2258
| Well, community college for me started out as 9 hours away. Then became three when I went to University. I guess my biggest advice to you in moving somewhere so radically different than home is, go to school part time so you can also get a job. This will help you acclimate more quickly, and if you do get distracted, the course load wouldn't get out of control as quickly.
Talk about a culture shock!!!! People from back East have a totally different perspective, might as well be a different planet, then combine that with being so city that they've never even seen a real horse (except maybe a police horse). Wow. Just wow.
I was the world's worst student, I barely made it through because I was also busy living my life. My parents were the worlds best students, they didn't have a life outside of their dorm room, library, and class room. They could not understand what went wrong with me! Ha ha.
After college, I got a job offer that was 26 hours away from home. I didn't even hesitate. I rocked that truck on out of state and was gone, gone, gone. I've visited home since then, and even got to work close to home for about a year, but I've since been 24 hours from everyone and I'm not going back. The closest I'll get is probably about 17 hours away when we settle down permanently. I can't imagine going home anymore. It's just too limited in opportunities for the horse world and good employment.
It can be done. But leave yourself an opportunity to really see things, hence the thought of a job. And then, if it's too much, go home with bells on to pick up right where you left off! |
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 Money Eating Baggage Owner
Posts: 9586
Location: Phoenix | When my boyfriend wanted to move to San Diego and have me come with him, I didn't want to go. But I knew if I didn't leave then, I would probably never leave my small town. So I went, without my horse, and I cried the entire drive there. I didn't have many friends still living in my hometown, so I didn't have that aspect to miss. I desperately missed home, rodeoing and my horse. We lived there for 3 years and just moved to Phoenix last Match. It was either move back home, or move to AZ where boyfriend's family is and we chose Phoenix Because of the economy. 9 months after moving here I got my horse Brought down and I don't even miss home anymore. I would never be able to call San Diego my new home, but I definitely feel like I could settle down here in AZ.
I will say that I thought I always wanted to live in the city but I HATED it in San Diego. I was in a busy neighborhood in SD like 2 blocks from the beach. I've never been more miserable. Now, we live in North Scottsdale where its a little more "country" and quiet. I'm still close to everything, but I'm more secluded and its quieter and I really like that. I'm also 10 minutes down the road from my horse which is awesome. |
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 Extreme Veteran
Posts: 304
Location: Up and over to the right | Come to NY and ride my pretty ponies! I'm near the city and while I hate being in the city for long (like more than a weekend) but if it's something you have interest in I say GO for it!! NY is different than anything in Texas that you've seen - be it good or bad. You can always go home if the first semester doesn't suit you well. |
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Don't Wanna Make This Awkward
Posts: 3106
Location: Texas | Longneck - 2015-04-02 10:18 AM I am going to live vicariously thru you and tell you to DO IT!!! (and then I can come visit you in NYC )
I wanted to do what you're doing, but already had three years invested into my boyfriend (now husband ) and he was worth more to me than packing up and moving. (I also was also on a hiatus from horses at the time. ) If I was to go back in time and be single during the period that you're at then I would do it in a heartbeat. You either love NYC or loathe it.. and I think you either want to be there 24/7 or never again.
As long as you're attending school or working (i.e. not just being a hermit in your apartment ) I would think you could make friends pretty easily. A roommate would certainly help with expenses, but if you think you could be comfortable making it by yourself then that's what I would go for... but I do better independently than having someone else around most of the time.
Good luck!! I'm extremely excited for you!!
If I go, i'm gonna hold you to this, you better come visit me! |
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 A Somebody to Everybody
Posts: 41354
Location: Under The Big Sky Of Texas | I always wanted to go visit New York city, I think it would be a really cool place to see.
I say GO FOR IT  |
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Don't Wanna Make This Awkward
Posts: 3106
Location: Texas | hammer_time - 2015-04-02 2:53 PM When my boyfriend wanted to move to San Diego and have me come with him, I didn't want to go. But I knew if I didn't leave then, I would probably never leave my small town. So I went, without my horse, and I cried the entire drive there. I didn't have many friends still living in my hometown, so I didn't have that aspect to miss. I desperately missed home, rodeoing and my horse. We lived there for 3 years and just moved to Phoenix last Match. It was either move back home, or move to AZ where boyfriend's family is and we chose Phoenix Because of the economy. 9 months after moving here I got my horse Brought down and I don't even miss home anymore. I would never be able to call San Diego my new home, but I definitely feel like I could settle down here in AZ.
I will say that I thought I always wanted to live in the city but I HATED it in San Diego. I was in a busy neighborhood in SD like 2 blocks from the beach. I've never been more miserable. Now, we live in North Scottsdale where its a little more "country" and quiet. I'm still close to everything, but I'm more secluded and its quieter and I really like that. I'm also 10 minutes down the road from my horse which is awesome.
See i'm the opposite I actually just got back from San Diego last week, I love it there. Nyc & SD are tied for my 2 favorite cities, there is just no way I could make anywhere in California work. The school in New York is a part of their community college system so it makes it affordable. I will say I think Arizona would be a perfect place to have horses. |
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