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 The Worst Seller Ever
Posts: 4138
  
Location: Oklahoma | It seems to me that most everyone in my life has a very aggressive/hard/non-emotional perosnality. When I talk or ask for advise they say, screw them you don't need them, just move on. When I look at life I see everyone all about themselves, and I try my hardest to show love and support to those closes to me. Sometimes I think it is a downfall or a weekness, but other times I feel sorry for those that can't express the caring emotions.
So are personalities defined by the world we live in, our hobbies, or just at random?
My personality tends to be a supporter, a giver. I really would like a defender or attacker type, but it hurts my heart to hurt others. | |
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Elite Veteran
Posts: 672
| clover girl - 2015-12-16 9:49 AM
 It seems to me that most everyone in my life has a very aggressive/hard/non-emotional perosnality.  When I talk or ask for advise they say, screw them you don't need them, just move on.  When I look at life I see everyone all about themselves, and I try my hardest to show love and support to those closes to me.  Sometimes I think it is a downfall or a weekness, but other times I feel sorry for those that can't express the caring emotions.Â
So are personalities defined by the world we live in, our hobbies, or just at random?
My personality tends to be a supporter, a giver. Â I really would like a defender or attacker type, but it hurts my heart to hurt others.Â
Why would you want to hurt others? To "get ahead" ? But are you really getting a head by hurting others? Use your God given personality to lift others up and in doing so you are lifted up. It takes a stronger person to show emotions of love, compassion, and empathy for others than it does to be self centered, self focused, and narcissistic. I think a lot of our society today does portray the qualities you mentioned as weak and undesirable, but what would happen if we were all hard asses? Just because society generates towards it does NOT mean it is right or desirable.... | |
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I just read the headlines
Posts: 4483
| I am overly sensitive and try to treat people the way I want to be treated. That said, I can also hold a grudge and can be judgmental but I really fight that because I don't like being that way, it makes me feel bad. I just decided to quit being so darn sensitive and be happy. If someone wants to be hardnosed, I just don't let it bother me. It's not easy, though it does get easier as the years go by. I am older and it has taken me years to improve just this little bit. Please just be the you that makes you happy and easy in your skin. Don't let people think you are weak or wrong. I find it takes more strength to be kind and open to people. It is much easier to close yourself off from people.
I think we are born with certain personality traits and then our environment, parents,etc. mold us. BUT we CAN change. That's the beauty of being human. Change is possisble, not easy, but possible.
Keep your head up and just be you. Who knows, maybe you can inspire someone in your circle to change.  | |
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Red Bull Agressive
Posts: 5981
Location: North Dakota | Everyone's born with their own personality. I think over time things that happen to you can affect that positively and negatively. I, myself, am naturally a really happy-go-lucky person. Loyal, supportive, easy going. But I do have a FIERCE independent/defiant streak that shows itself sometimes. Sometimes that's good. Sometimes that's bad. Having gone through a LOT of hardship in my relatively short life has made me much stronger than most people. So while I'm caring and empathetic overall, I'm known to tell people to "suck it up and deal with it" when they have a problem they think is the end of the world that to me is just a minor issue. | |
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 Owner of a ratting catting machine
Posts: 2258
| I think that the most important lesson that a nurturing/giving personality can learn, is judgment and a backbone. It's okay to always be giving, but that doesn't mean that everyone you meet is worthy of your life force. Using judgment to decide if you're just going to be taken advantage of, are being taken advantage of, and having enough guts to walk out of those situations is key.
In my world, it means a tiny circle that I can count on. It means a husband that is a true man that counts me as his best friend. It means being lonely sometimes rather than in the company of people that are users. Being a lone wolf is definitely preferable to me over shallow friendships and thin family ties.
It also means, if there's people that you just can't live without, that you limit their opportunity to screw you over. You also can use foresight to set their opportunities to being things of no real consequence to you. Sort of like a mutualistic relationship. You get what you want by being there for them in a way that won't hurt you, and they get what they want in return. You both win. But again, it's key to have judgement, a backbone, to set the boundaries here. Sometimes, enough is enough is enough. | |
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I just read the headlines
Posts: 4483
| classicpotatochip - 2015-12-16 12:06 PM
I think that the most important lesson that a nurturing/giving personality can learn, is judgment and a backbone. It's okay to always be giving, but that doesn't mean that everyone you meet is worthy of your life force. Using judgment to decide if you're just going to be taken advantage of, are being taken advantage of, and having enough guts to walk out of those situations is key.
In my world, it means a tiny circle that I can count on. It means a husband that is a true man that counts me as his best friend. It means being lonely sometimes rather than in the company of people that are users. Being a lone wolf is definitely preferable to me over shallow friendships and thin family ties.
It also means, if there's people that you just can't live without, that you limit their opportunity to screw you over. You also can use foresight to set their opportunities to being things of no real consequence to you. Sort of like a mutualistic relationship. You get what you want by being there for them in a way that won't hurt you, and they get what they want in return. You both win. But again, it's key to have judgement, a backbone, to set the boundaries here. Sometimes, enough is enough is enough.
Well said! | |
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"Heck's Coming With Me"
Posts: 10794
Location: Kansas | I'm meaner than a gut-shot grizzley.
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 A Somebody to Everybody
Posts: 41354
Location: Under The Big Sky Of Texas | Frodo - 2015-12-16 1:32 PM I'm meaner than a gut-shot grizzley.
LOL  | |
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 Take a Picture
Posts: 12838
| definitely a type Z
Edited by streakysox 2015-12-16 2:41 PM
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 Money Eating Baggage Owner
Posts: 9586
Location: Phoenix | I'm not really a caring person by nature. Like when people are crying or get hurt I do not have any NATURAL tendencies to comfort them. I do it because it's the right thing to do. I'm independent, defiant, usually joking, loyal....definitely judgemental but open minded. People are definitely wired with their own personality but your job, your happiness, your upbringing etc. I THINK can help you access emotions you're capable of. | |
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Elite Veteran
Posts: 1131
| I'm very blunt, tell it like it is, and it's my way or the highway. I don't put up with crap, from anyone. This makes me seem insensitive, cruel, a female dog, whatever. You don't get far blowing rainbows and flowers up people's butts and getting walked all over as people smarter and harder get it done. I used to be the sensitive type, then reality sets in, and life punches you in the face enough times you grow up and deal with the world as it really is. I've learned over the years that the only way to get crap done is to do it yourself, and I don't have time for anyone who plans on getting in the way.
Call me rude, insensitive, obnoxious, I couldn't give two flying craps. People like me are usually made this way by the poisons in their lives, and with all the poisons I've had in my life, name calling children are nothing but simple flies to be swatted. | |
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 I Want a "MAN"
Posts: 3610
Location: MD | hammer_time - 2015-12-16 2:41 PM I'm not really a caring person by nature. Like when people are crying or get hurt I do not have any NATURAL tendencies to comfort them. I do it because it's the right thing to do. I'm independent, defiant, usually joking, loyal....definitely judgemental but open minded. People are definitely wired with their own personality but your job, your happiness, your upbringing etc. I THINK can help you access emotions you're capable of.
I'm a lot like this! This would be a good way to discribe myself. | |
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 490
| FlyingHigh1454 - 2015-12-16 2:50 PM
I'm very blunt, tell it like it is, and it's my way or the highway. I don't put up with crap, from anyone. This makes me seem insensitive, cruel, a female dog, whatever. You don't get far blowing rainbows and flowers up people's butts and getting walked all over as people smarter and harder get it done. I used to be the sensitive type, then reality sets in, and life punches you in the face enough times you grow up and deal with the world as it really is. I've learned over the years that the only way to get crap done is to do it yourself, and I don't have time for anyone who plans on getting in the way.
Call me rude, insensitive, obnoxious, I couldn't give two flying craps. People like me are usually made this way by the poisons in their lives, and with all the poisons I've had in my life, name calling children are nothing but simple flies to be swatted.
You and I are just alike. I can feel when people are hurting but I have been punched in the face enough that I come across as cold. I will help people that are willing to help themselves tho. I have been called a female dog more times then I can count. And thats alright. If people think Im a callous hard @ss thats ok with me. I do actually care. I am very blunt and hurt peoples feelings sometimes. I dont sugar coat anything. I give everyone a fair chance but its only one chance. Last person I gave 2 chances to used me again. 3rd time wont happen. | |
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Rad Dork
Posts: 5218
Location: Oklahoma | I know plenty of people who have had hard lives and aren't mean because of it. I know people get tired of hearing it, but your attitude is everything. You can't always control the outcome, but you can control how you react to it.
I think it's pretty simple. If you want to be nice, you are. If you want to be mean, you are. I can be both, but I find being nice gets me further and keeps a nice reputation.
Don't be afraid to eliminate people that drain you. The world could use more kind people and less hatred.Â
I will never forget when my gelding was out with a suspensory injury last fall and you offered me a mare you had just so I could still get my BBRs in and not lose my entries at Jud Little's. You were a ray of sunshine during that time when I getting upset over the situation I found myself in. You solidified that there are good people in this sport. Please don't stop being that person just because some others are different.Â
It takes all kinds of kinds to make this world go 'round.
Edited by Longneck 2015-12-16 4:02 PM
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 Toastest with the Mostest
Posts: 5712
Location: That part of Texas | clover girl - 2015-12-16 9:49 AM It seems to me that most everyone in my life has a very aggressive/hard/non-emotional perosnality. When I talk or ask for advise they say, screw them you don't need them, just move on. When I look at life I see everyone all about themselves, and I try my hardest to show love and support to those closes to me. Sometimes I think it is a downfall or a weekness, but other times I feel sorry for those that can't express the caring emotions.
So are personalities defined by the world we live in, our hobbies, or just at random?
My personality tends to be a supporter, a giver. I really would like a defender or attacker type, but it hurts my heart to hurt others.
I wouldn't be surprised if some of their advice is possibly a little more harsh than what they would even do -- especially if they feel like someone is taking advantage of your kind heart. I know I can come off a little rougher in advice to some of my more caring friends do but I get mad when they put up with a lot of crap from someone who doesn't deserve their kindness. I hate having friends who get taken advantage of and I'm guilty of passing along the "tough" love speech of kicking them to the curb until they can behave. | |
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 Saint Stacey
| I think age has a lot to do with personality traits that people tend to express. Most late teens, and 20's tend to be pretty selfish and self serving. It's all about Self. Rarely do they think they are wrong and they aren't afraid to tell you about it.
Once you hit about 30, traits tend to shift. Mainly because people are starting to have kids and that changes your perspective on life. You tend to start looking at how your actions affect others. You realize actions have consequences that might not be good for your family. It softens the hard edges.
By 40 you have life pretty well figured out. I think you develop more empathy, but you also don't want to deal with the crap. Especially when those self serving kids are just being outright stupid, lol! | |
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 Elite Veteran
Posts: 929
| FlyingHigh1454 - 2015-12-16 12:50 PM
I'm very blunt, tell it like it is, and it's my way or the highway. I don't put up with crap, from anyone. This makes me seem insensitive, cruel, a female dog, whatever. You don't get far blowing rainbows and flowers up people's butts and getting walked all over as people smarter and harder get it done. I used to be the sensitive type, then reality sets in, and life punches you in the face enough times you grow up and deal with the world as it really is. I've learned over the years that the only way to get crap done is to do it yourself, and I don't have time for anyone who plans on getting in the way.
Call me rude, insensitive, obnoxious, I couldn't give two flying craps. People like me are usually made this way by the poisons in their lives, and with all the poisons I've had in my life, name calling children are nothing but simple flies to be swatted.
I am this way, too. Also hardened by the situations in life and circumstance...and from being constantly bullied when I was younger. I just learned to ignore people and their comments, learned a few biting phrases of my own and mastered a powerful left hook...and went about my way. That doesn't mean I'm uncaring or insensitive, it just means that I am exclusive with who I really care about. | |
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 Reaching for the stars....
Posts: 12704
| SKM - 2015-12-16 4:22 PM I think age has a lot to do with personality traits that people tend to express. Most late teens, and 20's tend to be pretty selfish and self serving. It's all about Self. Rarely do they think they are wrong and they aren't afraid to tell you about it. Once you hit about 30, traits tend to shift. Mainly because people are starting to have kids and that changes your perspective on life. You tend to start looking at how your actions affect others. You realize actions have consequences that might not be good for your family. It softens the hard edges. By 40 you have life pretty well figured out. I think you develop more empathy, but you also don't want to deal with the crap. Especially when those self serving kids are just being outright stupid, lol!
And then you hit 50. | |
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10D Crack Champion
|  I've always been crazy, but it's kept me from going insane.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8ecE1UML1q8
Edited by sodapop 2015-12-16 8:03 PM
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10D Crack Champion
| Frodo - 2015-12-16 1:32 PM I'm meaner than a gut-shot grizzley.
junkyard dog is that you? LOL Meaner than a junkyard dog is one I've always heard, but not gut-shot grizzly. That's a new one for me. ha | |
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