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 Extreme Veteran
Posts: 460
 
| This is going to sound really weird...but where do most of you meet your friends?? My friends from high school and I have all kind of gone separate ways. I work in a setting with mostly men, so it's difficult to meet any girl friends in work. I do have one friend that I would call my best friend, whom I met at a previous job. But our schedules don't quite match, so I don't get to see her very often either =/ I would LOVE to meet friends that ride horses!! I don't have any friends that ride anymore. At barrel races, I feel like I try to talk to people and make friends, but I never get that friendly feeling reciprocated. Maybe I'm not being outgoing enough...ergh! Hoping to pick up some tips on where to find real friends =p Thank you!! |
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 Extreme Veteran
Posts: 425
Location: California | Don't have much advise, but I'm right there with ya!! My bestie moved to San Diego and I don't drink or anything; so hard to find friends. |
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 Serious Snap Trapper
Posts: 4275
Location: In The Snow, AZ | I have one really good friend besides my husband. So
I'm not help. We met at a barrel race when I was selling a gelding she liked.
I have someone else who I still consider my friend, but I don't think the feeling is mutual since we had a disagreement.
I've found that friends create more drama and sadness than I need in my life. |
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 Undercover Amish Mafia Member
Posts: 9992
 
Location: Kansas | I'm in nursing school, so I rarely have time for friends :( But most of mine I would meet at barrel races, or high school |
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| I’ve lost touch with a lot of my friends from high school and college, but I agree with some of the other posters- I only have one good friend or two besides my husband, and he is my best friend. My other really good friend is the owner of the boarding facility where one of our mares is currently at, and he is also a coworker. My other close friend was an old coworker and we moved apart, but we still try to stay in touch and we are actually getting together and going to a concert next month! Other than that, I have a lot of acquaintances. I’ve always felt it’s better to have a few really good, close friends versus a whole slew of “kind of friends” or people I can’t be myself around.
I can understand getting in a “friend rut” and not having people you can relax with, joke with, ride with, drink wine with, etc., and that can be really frustrating! Especially when you want to try and meet new people and that feeling isn’t reciprocated, like you said.
What about your coworkers’ wives or girlfriends?
Sometimes it’s better to have less and be drama free and be content, than have a herd of friends that you really can’t stand, you know? Timing is everything.
I’m not sure where you live, but I would be your friend! Sometimes virtual friends are good too  |
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 Take a Picture
Posts: 12841
| A cowboy church? |
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 My Heart Be Happy
Posts: 9159
Location: Arkansas | madredepeanut - 2017-10-10 10:06 PM
I’ve lost touch with a lot of my friends from high school and college, but I agree with some of the other posters- I only have one good friend or two besides my husband, and he is my best friend. My other really good friend is the owner of the boarding facility where one of our mares is currently at, and he is also a coworker. My other close friend was an old coworker and we moved apart, but we still try to stay in touch and we are actually getting together and going to a concert next month! Other than that, I have a lot of acquaintances. I’ve always felt it’s better to have a few really good, close friends versus a whole slew of “kind of friends” or people I can’t be myself around.
I can understand getting in a “friend rut” and not having people you can relax with, joke with, ride with, drink wine with, etc., and that can be really frustrating! Especially when you want to try and meet new people and that feeling isn’t reciprocated, like you said.
What about your coworkers’ wives or girlfriends?
Sometimes it’s better to have less and be drama free and be content, than have a herd of friends that you really can’t stand, you know? Timing is everything.
I’m not sure where you live, but I would be your friend! Sometimes virtual friends are good too
You sure said it about virtual friends--even tho I'll probably never meet any of them, some of the people on this site I feel would have my back if I needed them for anything. All I'd need to do would be call. |
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 Scooters Savior
Location: "Si Fi" Ville | Where are you from?
Heck we are as friendly as Papas pet beagle and fun as three monkeys in a sack of bananas! |
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Scooters Savior
Location: "Si Fi" Ville | Ask Chandlers Mom. I think
she might verify that. Lol
And she's the nicest person you could ever know, hands down! |
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Expert
Posts: 1586
Location: west of East Texas | I don't know either. None of my long time best friends live anywhere near me or ride. My favorite hobby is running barrels so you can guess that we don't spend a lot of time together, just a few times a year. Between barrel races and youth rodeos with my kids, there are a lot of 'friends' but no one that would call me up and make plans for fun or to see if we are meeting up at the next race. I feel like I start more conversations than others, feel like I say 'hi' first, etc. trying to make better friends but it just doesn't go anywhere. |
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My Heart Be Happy
Posts: 9159
Location: Arkansas | treasurehunter - 2017-10-10 10:24 PM
Ask Chandlers Mom. I think
she might verify that. Lol
And she's the nicest person you could ever know, hands down!
You made my night saying this 
(Along with the text you sent me, which made me about snort Coke Zero out my nose when I watched the Wal-Mart "I Ain't Doin It" video!!) And this from a lady willing to open her house and barn to hurricane victims and their animals---and then cook for them?? That's a sweet, caring person in my book. . . .
To the OP--we will be here if you want to drop in and visit or have questions (lots of wisdom on here) or need something deeper from someone. I've found as I got older that my core group of friends has shrunk, that we pulled away from each other. But the ones I have now are deeper friendships I think. They will circle the wagons in a minute if needed! Good luck, and we're glad to have you as a BB.
Edited by Chandler's Mom 2017-10-11 4:37 AM
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 Owner of a ratting catting machine
Posts: 2258
| Barrelhorseworld. Ha ha. Seriously though, I've met three of my most important friends here on the forums. I've also met one very, very dear friend when I bought a horse from her after I saw an ad she posted here.
I've also had the pleasure to meet some BBs in person and spend some time with them at races or just here and there. There's some really incredible women that frequent this forum!
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 I hate cooking and cleaning
Posts: 3314
Location: Jersey Girl | Well...I have found my one true friend is my husband. I used to have girlfriends that I went out with or rode with but over the years we grew apart or some sort of drama happened that ended the friendship. Do I miss those girls nights out, yes of course but........
The other friends I have are horse friends that I only really see at horse activities or barrel races. I met both doing horsey things (trail riding or shows). |
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Elite Veteran
Posts: 897
| My husband is really my best friend. I'm very close with my mom, but she is 2 hrs away, so we e-mail and text a lot. I was really close to a few girls in high school, but that was a long time ago, and am not in touch with them anymore.
I guess I just feel like some friends can bring a lot of drama, and I don't have time for that..I like being by myself, and with my husband and animals.. |
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 460
| Aww, you guys are all so kind here =] Thank you so much for the wisdom and insight!! I am located in Washington state. I agree, I always feel welcomed and comfortable talking to you all on here, it's nice to have this kind of a support group. Hopefully I'll meet you in person someday =] Thank you, just talking like this helps me feel better! Very true, even online friendships can be true and strong. Loved reading these replies <3 I'm feeling much more cheery now! |
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 Expert
Posts: 1367
Location: mi | Your on the right track with the barrel races. I also work with all men, so my friends are my horse friends. Besides just trying to be friendly, around here we have circuits and organizations so you are running with the same people every weekend. Join one of those if you have them. Go to their meetings and help with set up and maybe in the office. That is how you really get to know people and see who you mesh with and friendships should just come along. Maybe slowly but if you are trying it will happen. |
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Elite Veteran
Posts: 682
Location: Northwest | I'm in the same boat. I'm naturally shy. My whole life I've only had one or two best friends, and I'm not the type to have 20 "friends"...who has time for that, and are they really "friends"?. It has taken me 5 years to get to the point where I know/have acquaintances at barrel races. Unfortunately, none of those have turned into true friendships (like where you'd do things together when not at a race) but I hope some of them will eventually. I'm from a super small town, everyone I went to school with has moved away and honestly, those left I have nothing in common with. I have made one very, very good friend and she was my barrel racing "mentor" when I was starting out. Does she have 25+ years on me? You bet, but she is still my closest friend who I can tell anything too, and the only one I find time to do anything with. Aside from that, I have met a couple nice ladies this year (I'm a real estate agent) who I enjoyed getting to know so I am TRYING to make a point of going to lunch with them every once in a while or having them over for dinner. |
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 Dancing in my Mind
Posts: 3062
Location: Eastern OH but my heart is in WV | Most of my friends now are through church and we have kids of similar ages. Honestly though, having a church family is a great way to met people and form lasting friendships. Also if you like trail riding, try finding a local trail riding group. I have some rodeo friends but we don't live close to each other and only get to see each other at the rodeos :( |
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Veteran
Posts: 225
Location: Montgomery TX | I think it's sad to see so many who "outgrow"our high school/college friendships. However, I'm in the same boat. I'm not the most outgoing person, until you get to know me. My husband really is my best friend, we do just about everything together, except work. This weekend, he is going out of town to shoot a bowfishing tournament - so I scrolled through my phone and FB friends and picked one, gave her a shout out (I literally have not seen or talked to her in 4-5 years) and we're having lunch on Saturday.
I think when we get married/have a family/start adulting, our priorities change and we don't realize how quickly the time goes by.Then the kids are grown and we have more time for ourselves (in my case anyway) And one day, you wake up and think wow, i wonder whatever happened to so and so.... I've decided recently (over this past weekend) that I am going to make it a priority to renew some friendships that have gotten lost over the years.
Also, I got re-married recently, and moved away from my circle of friends.... so it is not as easy to get together with them. I don't know anybody in my new home town besides my husband's friends and most of them are single, so I'm just one of the guys.... but I do miss having that female companionship.
Edited by bten 2017-10-11 12:23 PM
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| Katielovestbs - 2017-10-11 8:16 AM
Aww, you guys are all so kind here =] Thank you so much for the wisdom and insight!! I am located in Washington state. I agree, I always feel welcomed and comfortable talking to you all on here, it's nice to have this kind of a support group. Hopefully I'll meet you in person someday =] Thank you, just talking like this helps me feel better! Very true, even online friendships can be true and strong. Loved reading these replies <3 I'm feeling much more cheery now!
Where in Washington are you at? Was your picture taken at Emerald Downs?
I live in north central Washington, so not too far from Emerald!
It is always good to have virtual friends and live-in-person friends, I will send you a PM :) |
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