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Expert
Posts: 1488
  
| I'm the best friend I've ever had.
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Hungarian Midget Woman
 
Location: Midwest | DD2012 - 2013-12-12 7:28 AM I'm the best friend I've ever had.
And now, Miss Roxie Hart and Miss Velma Kelly sing a song
Of unrelenting determination and unmitigated ego |
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| I too done have any friends... had one in college... the only one i could consider a BEST Friend. she moved 3 states away got married and have a baby. If i'm lucky i talk to her once in 6 months. I miss her dearly. All the gals that i used to run with all quit barrel racing to raise a family. So when i go to a barrel race now i usually just keep to myself cuz i dont know a sole.
My problem with people... I can be too blunt. lol... Sometimes the filter on me is not in place and i speak my mind. Some people can handle it some can't! but on here like another poster said, i reread what i've wrote and try to make it nice lol!! |
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 Miss Laundry Misshap
Posts: 5271
| I have friends, but I think my best friends list is ZERO. I haven't received a phone call from anyone but my family in months. Out of 600+ friends on FB, I got around 65 Happy Birthday wishes. I did get a text from one of the people I would consider a best friend on my birthday, but it was a day late. I talk with the people I work with, but I've never been anywhere but work with them. My best friend who was my age, passed away a few years ago from a heart attack in a pool and drowned.
So yeah, I'm right there with ya.
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 Dr. Ruth
Posts: 9891
Location: Blissfully happy Giants fan!!! | I don't really have a lot of friends that I would consider my best friend but I have some pretty good close friends. Honestly, it is me and I know it. I am being really selfish with my time and I shouldn't be. I am also HORRID with posting happy birthday on facebook. As in I don't do it. I mean to and then I don't. I am pretty sure I am making that my New Year's resolution for next year...
I do know I need to make more of an effort. I am REALLY outgoing at my job. My customers see a side of me that people in my personal life don't see very often-not even my husband. It is exhausting but I have it and I need to be that person more.
just as an ETA: my husband is my best friend. But I agree with whoever that said being involved in things does help. I don't socialize at barrel races really (I am one who likes to get in, make a run, and get out and go home) but I do at church and things like that. I have made some great friends at church and I love them dearly.
Edited by sassy&tessa 2013-12-12 8:37 AM
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"Heck's Coming With Me"
Posts: 10794
Location: Kansas | Just to lighten the moment.......
" I consider myself a pretty good judge of people......that's why I don't like any of um."
Roseanne Barr
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 Undercover Amish Mafia Member
Posts: 9991
Location: Kansas | I have one friend who is a really good friend....the other is my horse trainer. Other than that I have absolutely no friends, not that I'm a bad person....just weeded out the people who take about me behind my back.
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Hungarian Midget Woman
Location: Midwest | hoofs_in_motion - 2013-12-12 8:17 AM I have one friend who is a really good friend....the other is my horse trainer. Other than that I have absolutely no friends, not that I'm a bad person....just weeded out the people who take about me behind my back.
I would have to say my husband is my best friend (I am lucky in that way), and I have a few close friends I keep in touch with. I am however horrible at calling people and scheduling things (due to the fact that we are all busy with work and/or family).
Also when you get out of you "roaring 20s" you tend to lose touch with those people you used to go out drinking with and not much else. I think that part of growing up and moving on is normal. Your priorites change. |
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 Three in a Bikini
Posts: 2035
| Ummm I am in the same boat.
I moved across America and now I have no one to talk to except my poor fiance who has got to be sick of me by now.
My lifelong best friend is getting married. Am I a bridesmaid? No. Obviously I am expected to fly back and forth to attend all of her events. *sigh
And now I have to ponder who to put in my bridal party. Do I include her? I want to but now my feelings are hurt and it seems unfair. Talk about Drama Rama!!! LMAO
But back to the original topic, yes I am friendless and I cant think of any clubs to join or social networks to dive into so I will continue to feel sorry for myself and peruse the interweb.
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Miss Laundry Misshap
Posts: 5271
| Someone mentioned their husband is their best friend. I can say I am lucky enough to have that. And my mom.
But as for getting away once in awhile...doesn't happen. |
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 Accident Prone
Posts: 22277
Location: 100 miles from Nowhere, AR | rollingrfarm - 2013-12-12 7:22 AM
I feel your pain, but after 30 years of being this way  - since college - I guess I'm used to it.  I'm not easy to get to know, I have a weird sense of humor, and I'm socially awkward at least I feel that way.  My best friend is my sister who is hundreds of miles away, and the total opposite of me.  I have a few friends an hour or two away but we don't see each other enough to really appreciate each other.  I guess it may be my fault, I am a homebody when I don't have to work.  They say "to have a friend you have to be a friend" and I'm not sure I'm good at being one.  Growing up, it seemed like my friends were all takers, not givers and I got burned alot by what I didn't realize were "mean girls".
I have to say that I was totally shocked and totally overjoyed and honored by a BB who I respect but rarely comunicate with who sent me a Thanksgiving message thanking me for all I do.  It was a short very unexpected message that put me on an emotional high way above the clouds.  I am going  to take a New Years Resolution lesson from this special person and learn to reach out to others and let them know that the things they do and the way they are is special and appreciated.  And then I'll crawl back into my shell LOL Â
 I consider you my friend. We may not see each other much, but I know if I called and said I needed you, you'd be there. And I'd do the same. |
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 Ms Bling Bling Sleeze Kitty
Posts: 20904
Location: LouLouVille, OK | When I moved 13 hrs from "home" 9 yrs ago, I felt pretty alone for a while.. and the only friends I really had were the few people I worked with and one neighbor that I didn't give a choice, she was going to be my friend like it or not! lol
now, 9 yrs later, I am blessed with a wonderful group of friends... met a few at races, met some through work, some through other friends and some online (three 4 luck ;) and they are all stuck with me... I have also had a friend for some 38 years... :) I find good ones and I hang onto um... the trick is weeding out the crappers LOL
Don't worry, strike up conversatins at the farm stores, wally where ever you are... eye contact is a big thing and you never know where it will go :) |
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Accident Prone
Posts: 22277
Location: 100 miles from Nowhere, AR | cindyt - 2013-12-12 9:15 AMWhen I moved 13 hrs from "home" 9 yrs ago, I felt pretty alone for a while.. and the only friends I really had were the few people I worked with and one neighbor that I didn't give a choice, she was going to be my friend like it or not! lol
now, 9 yrs later, I am blessed with a wonderful group of friends... met a few at races, met some through work, some through other friends and some online (three 4 luck ;) and they are all stuck with me... I have also had a friend for some 38 years... :) I find good ones and I hang onto um... the trick is weeding out the crappers LOL
Don't worry, strike up conversatins at the farm stores, wally where ever you are... eye contact is a big thing and you never know where it will go :)Â Â I love our text conversations. You never know where those suckers are going. Hehe
And I agree about eye contact. And smile. Ask people about themselves. I have a hard time with that because I feel nosy but most people love to talk about themselves.
Edited by Three 4 Luck 2013-12-12 9:21 AM
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 Expert
Posts: 1432
Location: Never in one place long | When I was a teenage I remember my Mother telling me "If you have ONE friend you know you can count on no matter what, you have more than most people" She also said the older you get the fewer true friends you are likely to have.... at the time I thought she was absolutely crazy but now I totally see her point.... Jobs, kids and business seems to get in the way of friendships all too often and it's sad.
I still talk with my friends occasionaly but now that I live 16hrs from them and they live their lives and I mine it's hard to stay in touch. I know if I needed them Most would be there for me but things just aren't like they were when we were younger.
If you have good friends ALWAYS follow through on your commitments and be a GREAT friend to them, great friends are hard to come by, if you don't have good friends FIND THEM! Sometimes it takes a long time and you have to really get out and make them, join a book club, riding club, volunteer etc... that is how I made new friends when I moved and I have some really awesome ones!
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I Really Love Jeans
Posts: 3173
Location: North Dakota | I am the same way. I grew up in the middle of nowhere and didn't interact with other kids unless it was during school hours and that was usually a flop because kids tend to stick with the kids in the neighborhood they grow up in. So really I have never had a true solid friend only people that I know basically. At one point I did have a friendship building for about three years, she even baptised my daughter but that ended when she made a pass at trying to take my husband. I had another female show interest in friending me since I moved to Dallas but like always she was only interested in getting close to me to get to my husband. Yes I have a HOT husband, lol. Considering I am an old chicken now I simply do not interact with people anymore because after a life time of no friends I simply want to be alone now! I speak to people if they speak to me but I am not the bubbly oh my God bouncing off the wall so interested in you person! Anyway I stick to my horses and family. |
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 A Somebody to Everybody
Posts: 41354
Location: Under The Big Sky Of Texas | DD2012 - 2013-12-12 7:28 AM I'm the best friend I've ever had.
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A Somebody to Everybody
Posts: 41354
Location: Under The Big Sky Of Texas | I am so busy with my own family and keeping up with my place, horses, my hubby is my best friend and just dont have the time to go hang out with anyone. My grand kids keeps me really busy. I do have friends, glad to see them when we meet up but thats not to offten.  |
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Addicted to Baseball
Location: Where the stars at night are big and bright, TX | sassy&tessa - 2013-12-12 7:53 AM I don't really have a lot of friends that I would consider my best friend but I have some pretty good close friends. Honestly, it is me and I know it. I am being really selfish with my time and I shouldn't be. I am also HORRID with posting happy birthday on facebook. As in I don't do it. I mean to and then I don't. I am pretty sure I am making that my New Year's resolution for next year...
I do know I need to make more of an effort. I am REALLY outgoing at my job. My customers see a side of me that people in my personal life don't see very often-not even my husband. It is exhausting but I have it and I need to be that person more.
just as an ETA: my husband is my best friend. But I agree with whoever that said being involved in things does help. I don't socialize at barrel races really (I am one who likes to get in, make a run, and get out and go home ) but I do at church and things like that. I have made some great friends at church and I love them dearly.
I've tried and then back away from the "getting involved" stuff. I sit here and think geez I need to socialize out here, talk to more than the dogs, horses and chickens. Then when you do, you end up getting caught up in little town politics, personality politics, this group of people, that group of people, the ranchers wives who won't lift a finger and get dirty, the ranchers wives who are into the mud and the blood, neither one considers the other worth friending, big fish in a little pond, little fish in the little pond, wingnuts, whackos, the self-important, the entitled, the lower places type you don't want to really be considered a friend of, then I feel like I don't want to get into any of it further and play the social games and I make a quick retreat thankful I'm an unknown. Then I'm unknown and thought of as stuck up. You get involved and they're suspicious of you, you don't get involved and they're suspicious of you. I'm like you, I don't want to play the games, I just want to work and live my life without the social complications. lol It all just doesn't come easy for me I guess. Truth be told I'll complain of no social circle out here but I'm happier when I don't have all the personalities to try to appeal to or figure out. I've been told I'm a "come here not a from here" and it used to offend me, but more often than not after seeing how some of the minds work, I'm thinking THANK GOODNESS. lol |
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 The Bird Lady
Posts: 6440
Location: The end of the Earth, SE AR | Three 4 Luck - 2013-12-12 8:56 AM rollingrfarm - 2013-12-12 7:22 AM I feel your pain, but after 30 years of being this way - since college - I guess I'm used to it. I'm not easy to get to know, I have a weird sense of humor, and I'm socially awkward at least I feel that way. My best friend is my sister who is hundreds of miles away, and the total opposite of me. I have a few friends an hour or two away but we don't see each other enough to really appreciate each other. I guess it may be my fault, I am a homebody when I don't have to work. They say "to have a friend you have to be a friend" and I'm not sure I'm good at being one. Growing up, it seemed like my friends were all takers, not givers and I got burned alot by what I didn't realize were "mean girls".
I have to say that I was totally shocked and totally overjoyed and honored by a BB who I respect but rarely comunicate with who sent me a Thanksgiving message thanking me for all I do. It was a short very unexpected message that put me on an emotional high way above the clouds. I am going to take a New Years Resolution lesson from this special person and learn to reach out to others and let them know that the things they do and the way they are is special and appreciated. And then I'll crawl back into my shell LOL I consider you my friend. We may not see each other much, but I know if I called and said I needed you, you'd be there. And I'd do the same.
I'm there for you in thick and thin except when you kids have the flu and are throwing up. When that happens I'll stand at the end of your drive and leave you cases of paper towels and anything else you ask for. (Clumbsy effort at lightheartedness)
Edited by rollingrfarm 2013-12-12 10:41 AM
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 306
| Through high school I never had a set group of friends I hung out with. I usually just hung around with whatever boyfriend I had at the time and his friends. Or with the girls that were in whatever sport I was playing at the time. After high school I tried to keep up with some of the girls I was closest to but it always seemed as if I was the one putting in all the work.
But you have to remember that friends grow apart. They change. Now one of my best friends is a neighbor. I sometimes wish that I would have met her earlier in life because we get along so well.
Maybe you need to go out there and meet new people. I never use talk to anyone because I was shy. But with a little courage and help from social, such as facebook I got closer to people, and now I feel like a I have more friends then ever.
Also, if a new friend offers to do something with you or invites you along. Go with them. Even if it's inconvenient or you don't want to. If you start turning down offers they won't invite you to do anything. Which makes it difficult to start a friendship.
Put yourself out there you never know who your next best friend could be.
As for the wedding, from what I've heard being a bridesmaid can be a pain and expensive(dresses, gifts, parties, ets.). Maybe pick a Maid of Honor and stick with that. If your groom wants more groomsman, fill the rest in with family from both sides.
I've been where your at, but we choose to be side or we choose to be happy. But we are all entitled to a little pitty party. |
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