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Go Get Em!
Posts: 13503
     Location: OH. IO | I think of you often,and pray you find peace in your heart  |
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 Balance Beam and more...
Posts: 11493
          Location: 31 lengths farms | I have not words of wisdom, just prayers that there will come a day when thoughts of your Matty first bring a smile to your face, enough so that your heart has some ease. |
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Cold hands and Warm Heart
      Location: oklahoma |  
i think of you often |
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 Scorpions R Us
Posts: 9586
       Location: So. Cali. | I know how sick I am over the 'punishment' or lack their of, he has recieved so I can only ever begin to imagine the pain you are in. Continued for you and your family |
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 Expert
Posts: 2036
  Location: Montana |    |
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Expert
Posts: 3147
   
| Prayers that you find peace. |
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  Angel in a Sorrel Coat
Posts: 16030
     Location: In a happy place | You have been on my mind so much the last two weeks. My heart just breaks for you. The legal system for the most part is an enemy. Prayers for peace and comfort for you.                    |
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 Ima Non Controversial Girl
Posts: 4168
     Location: where the wind blows | When I saw the news of his release I instantly thought of you Jetz. The justice system in Canada is joke. But you know that. Canadians in general know how pathetic our justice system is. I can't imagine what you are going through. And as much as I agree that you need to forgive this monster for your own healing I'm not sure I could do the same walking your path. Continued prayers to you for peace.  |
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 No Fear
Posts: 5089
    Location: TN |   |
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 501
 Location: Alberta |    |
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  More bootie than waist!
Posts: 18425
          Location: Riding Crackhead. |  |
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 pressure dripper
Posts: 8696
        Location: the end of the rainbow | I cannot imagine your struggle. It's not really that he wasn't punished but more that he doesn't own the fact that he took 5 young innocent lives. I am sorry. It would be really hard for me too. I am also praying that you will soon be able to open your heart allow our Lord and Savior to grant you to peace you so deserve. I know your heart is heavy and that you miss your Matty terribly. I am so sorry. |
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 Expert
Posts: 2154
    Location: USA | Jetz, everyone grieves and heals in different times and ways. Some take longer than others. Some never quit grieving. Your heart is still heavy, with courts and paroles still so fresh,and forgiveness may not be part of your vocabulary right now, but please do not hold onto the hatred. I pray in time you will let go of the hatred. It does not mean you are saying what happened is okay, it will only mean that you refuse to let what happened control you. I've been in a similar situation. It took me several years to forgive. When I realized I finally forgave him, a huge weight had been lifted. Now if I met the guy who took mine from me on the street, I would probably knock the crap out of him, but I no longer hate him. Many hugs and prayers for you. |
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 Grasshopper
Posts: 7726
      Location: Lost in North Dakota....wishin on all the stars | Thank you everyone. This has been a journey, a struggle and a... Well a learning experience. I have learned things about myself that I never could have thought. I don't "hate" the guy. Not saying I wouldn't step on his head of he were drowning in a puddle, and I don't wish harm upon him. Its just frustrating now, 3 years later his family and friends still try to down play what he did, still try to blame my Matthew. And me, well I can't ignore them when they do this. I have the whole court transcript in my email, I have the police file on a disc, no one wants to see that when I offer to send it, because the truth is printed in black and white.... His mom, recently said that kids speeding is becoming a problem....and that buddy wants to speak to youths about that ...... Well ok, but maybe he should also add that he was 3 times the legal limit (after they picked him up hours later) maybe he should add that he ran away from the accident and failed to render any kind of help... Instead of calling 911 he called his sister (and SHE did not call 911 either).... So own it all. Just because our crown was a punk and took the coward way out by taking a crappy plea deal, JUST because that plea deal didnt include drunk driving causing death doesn't mean that you weren't doing it and certainly doesn't mean that it was admitted to in court. along with the, I was too drunk to be driving and I knew it... Bah, sorry, I am ranting. I do that from we'll all the time. Anyway, I asked someone in his family to contact me... Because I want to know who he is. I don't think he is a monster, but he is after all the leading person in my nightmare.... I want to know what kind of person he is, I want them to know about Matthew and who he was, maybe that will help us both in our healing....
. Yesterday the woman from the parole board called me to explain everything to me.. This woman has heard me rant, heard me cry, heard me be mean and heard me be... Ok with everything. She has known me through most of this process and yesterday she cried with me, on the phone as we talked about these past 7 months... You could hear her heart break in her voice when I told her I was concerned for my Chance and for all the siblings of the boys, because what if he showed up at a football game or graduation or stood behind them in line at WalMart... I was, am and will be so worried for my Chance, the thought of him driving drunk again and hitting my Bean consumes me.... But he is going to Spruce Grove... Just outside of Edmonton... And for that, I am thankful....
Zach is doing.... Good?? Well maybe as good as can be expected. He helps coach the football team. He has anger issues, doesn't understand why he lived. He told Chance one day, that he wished Matt had been smaller, so he could have died too... Matts 6'5 295lb frame took the brunt of the impact off of Zach... He graduated this year, Like Tanner and Walter should have....The Almighty has plans for Zach and what they are... Well we will see.
. On the other side of all this, my heart was devastated again for a family who have become dear friends. She may or may not be a buddy on here so I won't mention names, but in August of 2011, her high school age son was also killed by a drunk driver in Saskatchewan.... This boy was a handsome athletic, bull riding, brilliant hockey playing teen. Yesterday the man who killed him was given a 6 month sentence..... Justins life... Was with 6 short months.... Canadas justice system is broken.....
. Now, lol if you stayed with me long enough to read this novel... The rantings of a mad bat crap crazy woman... Then maybe you would like to do something. Kim Thomas whose son Brandon was killed just before Christmas 2012 is planning a shoe in, on the court steps in Calgary. We are collecting shoes, to represent all the kids and people killed by drunk drivers.... If you would like to send her a pair of shoes, please message me and I will send you her address. After the show in, the shoes in good co dition will be donated to charities throughout the area....
Thank you all, from day 1, this board has been my support. I have met some amazing people through this journey... You all have cried, been mad and sick with me through it all. You turned the world orange for my boys, you gave me sense when my brain was not working... Each of you mean a great deal to me and it is because you were here in the beginning, I thought I would let you know the end of the beginning... Love to each of you all..... |
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 Elite Veteran
Posts: 802
   
| Many prayers for you ..... over time, I promise your heart will heal and you will find peace. Feel for you so much during this time. 
ETA pls send me Kim's address, I will send shoes
Edited by sweetjet 2014-06-06 10:50 AM
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Elite Veteran
Posts: 738
    Location: Anywhere my horses are ! Lost in Texas!!!!! | Thinking of you |
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 Slap Happy
Posts: 3530
    Location: Frogsboro, NC | HUGS and PRAYERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!    |
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Elite Veteran
Posts: 1028
 
| I am so sorry. I cannot imagine exactly what you are going through, but on July 27, 2013, my 18 year old brother was ganged up on and beaten to death at a party. The police still have no one in custody, and to be honest, I think they've stopped looking. I have been angry/sad since that day, but like you, I am determined to find that forgiveness in my heart. I pray that you do as well. |
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 Serious Snap Trapper
Posts: 4275
       Location: In The Snow, AZ | Forgiveness will come when it is meant to come. I believe God expects us to forgive others, but I don't believe it has to happen immediately. Until you find that peace, be angry. Be hurt. Be sad. Love your family. Laugh and smile as much as you can. Cry for God when you can't. Hold on to hope for better days, because they will come. I'm praying for you. May God bless you. I pray you find peace and purpose. As long as you're breathing, God has a reason for you. |
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 477
      
| bowersk - 2014-06-06 12:33 PM
I am so sorry. I cannot imagine exactly what you are going through, butΒ on July 27, 2013, my 18 year old brother wasΒ ganged up onΒ and beaten to death at a party.Β The police still have no one in custody, and to be honest, I think they've stopped looking. I Β have been angry/sad since that day, but like you, I am determined to find that forgiveness in my heart. I pray that you do as well.
I am so sorry for your loss, how terrible and horriffic! What could have caused someone or some other teens to want to do such a thing to your brother?
To the OP, I feel so sad and angry for your loss. Prayers for your peace. |
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