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Shipwreck Island

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redmansmyman11
Reg. Jan 2012
Posted 2014-07-08 11:34 AM
Subject: RE: Shipwrech Island



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LRQHS - 2014-07-07 8:37 PM

MR WASHINGTON!!!! THE DAY MY MOM PICKED ME UP FROM NURSING SCHOOL WITH A TRAILER FULL OF SHATTING COWS!!!

please please please please please please can we have the cow story again??!!!!
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LRQHS
Reg. Nov 2011
Posted 2014-07-08 12:07 PM
Subject: RE: Shipwrech Island


Military family

Shipwrecked and Flat Out Zapped


Posts: 16390
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Location: DUMPING CATS AND PIGS IN TEXAS :)
redmansmyman11 - 2014-07-08 11:34 AM
LRQHS - 2014-07-07 8:37 PM MR WASHINGTON!!!! THE DAY MY MOM PICKED ME UP FROM NURSING SCHOOL WITH A TRAILER FULL OF SHATTING COWS!!!
please please please please please please can we have the cow story again??!!!!

 oHHHH all right lol...
 
The Day My Mom Picked Me Up From Nursing School
 
So, I'm in Nursing School back in 1995 and in my 20's. I had recently gotten out of the Air Force and came home for school. My brand new Capri with 30,000 miles on it blew up, so I decided to hoof it to and from school....which was about 3 miles away. Carrying my booksack of huge Nursing books was not easy. I must have complained a few times....

So, about my Mom. She is not like other Mom's. She raised cattle, would go to the sale barn, drove a truck, never cleaned it out.....there was literally a pile of coke cans, chip bags, beer bottles, etc...on the passenger side floor board. You could not open the door without something falling out. My Mom usually had holes in her jeans and, occasionally, wore no underwear. I believe she just couldn't find any to put on most of the time. She never brushed her hair.....never.

Anyways, so I'm sitting in class at 3pm one afternoon with all of my nursing peers and it was about 20 minutes until we got let out for the day. We are taking a test and it was dead quiet in there. Everyone was concentrating on which answer to choose and out of the deafening silence we hear, "MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! MOOOOOOOO!!!!!" I know my face turned 3 shades of read, because I knew what that was, my Mom had come to get me from school after a cow sale. The mooing was ridiculous! It would not stop and people started to giggle and look around, "like what in the world is going on out there?"

I finished my test very quickly at that point. I'm pretty sure that I just picked letters to bubble in and didn't even look at those last 15 questions. I turned my test in and packed my book sack full. I sat on the edge of my seat waiting for the bell to ring. I was going to bolt out of there and be gone before anyone could see my Mom and her cows.

Well, the bell rang and I ran out of that class room. I sprinted down the hall and out the front door. There under the over hang, on the concrete driveway, at the school entrance was my Mom's truck. She had her old iron trailer that was iron open bars (so no real trailer wall barrier) and it was packed with cows. I guess she got a bunch of good cow bargains that day and just had the smaller trailer with her???? Those cows were on top of each other and they were shatting that loose, green cow shat. It was everywhere....on the cows, off the fender of the trailer and splattered all over the concrete at the entrance of the school. I wanted to die. I sprint up to her truck and open the passenger door and a mountain of crap fell out. More that usual and as I'd pick it up and throw it back in more crap would fall out. I'm talking beer bottles, screwdrivers, bills, you name it......

At this time, everyone from class started walking outside and going, "oh Jesus Christ that stinks!" and "Ewwwww, those cows shat every where!" If I could have crawled under that truck, I would have.

And, my Mom is all smiles......"so, how was your day?" and, I'm like, "shut up and get us the hell out of here AND NEVER EVER COME PICK ME UP FROM SCHOOL AGAIN!!!" "I will walk barefooted, up a hill of gravels for 2 miles if I have to....EVERYDAY!!"

My old Nursing class mates still remind me of the day my Mom came to pick me up from school and laugh.

The End :)
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total performance
Reg. Nov 2007
Posted 2014-07-08 12:37 PM
Subject: RE: Shipwreck Island



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Priceless!   
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sorrel horse ranch
Reg. Apr 2006
Posted 2014-07-08 12:37 PM
Subject: RE: Shipwreck Island


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I am laughing so hard.  It is wonderful to have your stories told on here.  I still think you need to write a book with your stories.  I really think you could get rich!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 
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komet.
Reg. Jun 2012
Posted 2014-07-08 12:39 PM
Subject: RE: Shipwreck Island



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CanCan - 2014-07-07 8:59 PM

Where the heck did it go? I have a post that I wanted to start over there.

Someone in authority watched Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End and realized some things COULD come back from the dead...and it would be safer to send the Island beyond that point..
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dianea
Reg. Aug 2010
Posted 2014-07-08 12:43 PM
Subject: RE: Shipwreck Island



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Jennifer if you try really, really hard, I bet you can get a new island! I miss Shipwreck - I had it bookmarked and would go there first! Prime fun was following a new thread and thinking...gonna have to start swimming in 3...2...1!

Cows at school is awesome, but I somehow missed granny under the tree story. How about a replay of that one too? Pretty please???!!!!
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LRQHS
Reg. Nov 2011
Posted 2014-07-08 12:46 PM
Subject: RE: Shipwreck Island


Military family

Shipwrecked and Flat Out Zapped


Posts: 16390
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Location: DUMPING CATS AND PIGS IN TEXAS :)
Here's the cemetary story. It's not funny unless you can laugh at very awkward, unbelievable situtations. 
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texas taz
Reg. Dec 2009
Posted 2014-07-08 12:49 PM
Subject: RE: Shipwreck Island



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Posts: 766
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Location: Texas
I love your stories!!!! 
And miss them.....
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LRQHS
Reg. Nov 2011
Posted 2014-07-08 1:09 PM
Subject: RE: Shipwreck Island


Military family

Shipwrecked and Flat Out Zapped


Posts: 16390
5000500050001000100100100252525
Location: DUMPING CATS AND PIGS IN TEXAS :)
 The Cemetary Story
 
So, my new boyfriend is really country. The family lives about 30 minutes away, but it's in the middle of no where and there are no stores close, there are bayous....his family reminds me of the family from Next Of Kin. I'm not lying. He's like Patrick Swayze that moved to the city. His brother had a gigantic snake in a bucket the first visit there.

So, my second visit there was this past weekend. We visit with his Mom and my dude's brother's daughter had had a miscarriage at 8 months gestation a few days before. My boyfriend had gone to the funeral. I didn't. 

They told me that the grandmother, my boyfriends Mom,  was teaching Vacation Bible School when they told her the news and their words were, "she just passed plum out and fell on the floor."

The brother has had multiple back surgeries and is on "pills" and lot's of them and is over weight. He looks rough.

So, we're leaving his Mom's house and the brother calls Bryan and asks us to stop by the Cemetary to help him (I'm thinking, "this is strange.) So, we go.

The brother is there with another dude that I'm told is a crack head. They have a large wooden box, Quick Crete, a few shovels, two large tubs and a water hose. 

So, brother tells Bryan that he wants him to supervise the Quick Crete pouring. We go over to where they are and, to my relief, there is fresh dirt where they buried the casket already. I'm assuming the funeral home did....but, I really don't know. It is next to another small grave and I later found out the other grave was the brother's infant son from years back and I assume to make the most out of the burial plot, they combined the two graves to make one normal size one.

Ok, so brother starts digging around the grave which is packed in around 4 other graves on all four sides. Brother was sweating, pale, and looked like he was about have a heart attack. All I could think was, "I do not want to have to do CPR on this dude in a graveyard when he has a heart attack." So, I told Bryan we needed to help. I brought the brother water and a cool cloth for his neck and Bryan started digging to place that wooden box over the graves to fill it in with concrete.

Now, I thought the funeral home was supposed to do that and I'm just waiting for the police to show up thinking we're robbing graves.

So, long story short. I helped keep the brother alive. I stirred Quick Crete with a crack head and smoothed the cement over these two graves to make it look like one.

Also, just to give you an idea of the scenerio I was in. The brother kept talking to the dead people when he stepped on their graves or accidently hit one with his foot. He would say, "sorry I stepped on you Lanny" and "Scarlett I didn't mean to kick you."
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texas taz
Reg. Dec 2009
Posted 2014-07-08 1:18 PM
Subject: RE: Shipwreck Island



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Posts: 766
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Location: Texas
LRQHS - 2014-07-08 1:09 PM
 The Cemetary Story

 


So, my new boyfriend is really country. The family lives about 30 minutes away, but it's in the middle of no where and there are no stores close, there are bayous....his family reminds me of the family from Next Of Kin. I'm not lying. He's like Patrick Swayze that moved to the city. His brother had a gigantic snake in a bucket the first visit there.



So, my second visit there was this past weekend. We visit with his Mom and my dude's brother's daughter had had a miscarriage at 8 months gestation a few days before. My boyfriend had gone to the funeral. I didn't. 



They told me that the grandmother, my boyfriends Mom,  was teaching Vacation Bible School when they told her the news and their words were, "she just passed plum out and fell on the floor."



The brother has had multiple back surgeries and is on "pills" and lot's of them and is over weight. He looks rough.



So, we're leaving his Mom's house and the brother calls Bryan and asks us to stop by the Cemetary to help him (I'm thinking, "this is strange.) So, we go.



The brother is there with another dude that I'm told is a crack head. They have a large wooden box, Quick Crete, a few shovels, two large tubs and a water hose. 



So, brother tells Bryan that he wants him to supervise the Quick Crete pouring. We go over to where they are and, to my relief, there is fresh dirt where they buried the casket already. I'm assuming the funeral home did....but, I really don't know. It is next to another small grave and I later found out the other grave was the brother's infant son from years back and I assume to make the most out of the burial plot, they combined the two graves to make one normal size one.



Ok, so brother starts digging around the grave which is packed in around 4 other graves on all four sides. Brother was sweating, pale, and looked like he was about have a heart attack. All I could think was, "I do not want to have to do CPR on this dude in a graveyard when he has a heart attack." So, I told Bryan we needed to help. I brought the brother water and a cool cloth for his neck and Bryan started digging to place that wooden box over the graves to fill it in with concrete.



Now, I thought the funeral home was supposed to do that and I'm just waiting for the police to show up thinking we're robbing graves.



So, long story short. I helped keep the brother alive. I stirred Quick Crete with a crack head and smoothed the cement over these two graves to make it look like one.



Also, just to give you an idea of the scenerio I was in. The brother kept talking to the dead people when he stepped on their graves or accidently hit one with his foot. He would say, "sorry I stepped on you Lanny" and "Scarlett I didn't mean to kick you."


Needless to say, you had another adventure...... We need to all pack in the bus to go on your next one......  
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LRQHS
Reg. Nov 2011
Posted 2014-07-08 1:20 PM
Subject: RE: Shipwreck Island


Military family

Shipwrecked and Flat Out Zapped


Posts: 16390
5000500050001000100100100252525
Location: DUMPING CATS AND PIGS IN TEXAS :)
dianea - 2014-07-08 12:43 PM Jennifer if you try really, really hard, I bet you can get a new island! I miss Shipwreck - I had it bookmarked and would go there first! Prime fun was following a new thread and thinking...gonna have to start swimming in 3...2...1! Cows at school is awesome, but I somehow missed granny under the tree story. How about a replay of that one too? Pretty please???!!!!

Granny Under the Tree was just us joking about my Mom and her insanity during pecan picking time. She is mortal enemies with the squirrels and cusses and screams at them, throws pecans at them. We buy her squirrel stuff all the time to pick at her. Got her a T-shirt that has "The Squirrel Whisperer" on it. Put a sign on her bedroom door that has "Squirrel Xing" on it like a road sign. Anyways, she had been talking about the nursing home a lot even though she's just in her 60's and it was starting to get ridiculous. I guess she was thinking about it. So, I just told her one day that I wasn't going to put her in a nursing home, I was just going to chain her ankle to a pecan tree, slap a diaper on her and leave her some water while I went to work. That way she could pick pecans and cuss the squirrels all day and we wouldn't have to worry about her wandering down the road mumbling, "those damn squirrels are out to get me." 
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LRQHS
Reg. Nov 2011
Posted 2014-07-08 1:31 PM
Subject: RE: Shipwreck Island


Military family

Shipwrecked and Flat Out Zapped


Posts: 16390
5000500050001000100100100252525
Location: DUMPING CATS AND PIGS IN TEXAS :)
texas taz - 2014-07-08 1:18 PM
LRQHS - 2014-07-08 1:09 PM
 The Cemetary Story

 


So, my new boyfriend is really country. The family lives about 30 minutes away, but it's in the middle of no where and there are no stores close, there are bayous....his family reminds me of the family from Next Of Kin. I'm not lying. He's like Patrick Swayze that moved to the city. His brother had a gigantic snake in a bucket the first visit there.



So, my second visit there was this past weekend. We visit with his Mom and my dude's brother's daughter had had a miscarriage at 8 months gestation a few days before. My boyfriend had gone to the funeral. I didn't. 



They told me that the grandmother, my boyfriends Mom,  was teaching Vacation Bible School when they told her the news and their words were, "she just passed plum out and fell on the floor."



The brother has had multiple back surgeries and is on "pills" and lot's of them and is over weight. He looks rough.



So, we're leaving his Mom's house and the brother calls Bryan and asks us to stop by the Cemetary to help him (I'm thinking, "this is strange.) So, we go.



The brother is there with another dude that I'm told is a crack head. They have a large wooden box, Quick Crete, a few shovels, two large tubs and a water hose. 



So, brother tells Bryan that he wants him to supervise the Quick Crete pouring. We go over to where they are and, to my relief, there is fresh dirt where they buried the casket already. I'm assuming the funeral home did....but, I really don't know. It is next to another small grave and I later found out the other grave was the brother's infant son from years back and I assume to make the most out of the burial plot, they combined the two graves to make one normal size one.



Ok, so brother starts digging around the grave which is packed in around 4 other graves on all four sides. Brother was sweating, pale, and looked like he was about have a heart attack. All I could think was, "I do not want to have to do CPR on this dude in a graveyard when he has a heart attack." So, I told Bryan we needed to help. I brought the brother water and a cool cloth for his neck and Bryan started digging to place that wooden box over the graves to fill it in with concrete.



Now, I thought the funeral home was supposed to do that and I'm just waiting for the police to show up thinking we're robbing graves.



So, long story short. I helped keep the brother alive. I stirred Quick Crete with a crack head and smoothed the cement over these two graves to make it look like one.



Also, just to give you an idea of the scenerio I was in. The brother kept talking to the dead people when he stepped on their graves or accidently hit one with his foot. He would say, "sorry I stepped on you Lanny" and "Scarlett I didn't mean to kick you."

Needless to say, you had another adventure...... We need to all pack in the bus to go on your next one......  

I was so tempted to start answering the brother back like the dead people were answering him back......


"It's ok, Wayne! It didn't hurt when you stepped on me!" 
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barrelracr131
Reg. Aug 2011
Posted 2014-07-08 1:50 PM
Subject: RE: Shipwreck Island


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Location: Midwest
I still can't get over talking to the dead people... like... do the talk back? 
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LRQHS
Reg. Nov 2011
Posted 2014-07-08 1:51 PM
Subject: RE: Shipwreck Island


Military family

Shipwrecked and Flat Out Zapped


Posts: 16390
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Location: DUMPING CATS AND PIGS IN TEXAS :)
barrelracr131 - 2014-07-08 1:50 PM I still can't get over talking to the dead people... like... do the talk back? 

Ummmmm, these didn't. At least, not while I was there. 
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barrelracr131
Reg. Aug 2011
Posted 2014-07-08 2:03 PM
Subject: RE: Shipwreck Island


Hungarian Midget Woman


50002000100100
Location: Midwest
LRQHS - 2014-07-08 1:51 PM
barrelracr131 - 2014-07-08 1:50 PM I still can't get over talking to the dead people... like... do the talk back? 
Ummmmm, these didn't. At least, not while I was there. 

huh, maybe you just don't have the gift


also they changed your name apparently 
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LRQHS
Reg. Nov 2011
Posted 2014-07-08 2:26 PM
Subject: RE: Shipwreck Island


Military family

Shipwrecked and Flat Out Zapped


Posts: 16390
5000500050001000100100100252525
Location: DUMPING CATS AND PIGS IN TEXAS :)
barrelracr131 - 2014-07-08 2:03 PM
LRQHS - 2014-07-08 1:51 PM
barrelracr131 - 2014-07-08 1:50 PM I still can't get over talking to the dead people... like... do the talk back? 
Ummmmm, these didn't. At least, not while I was there. 
huh, maybe you just don't have the gift





also they changed your name apparently 

I don't see dead people either....... 
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texas taz
Reg. Dec 2009
Posted 2014-07-08 3:07 PM
Subject: RE: Shipwreck Island



Elite Veteran


Posts: 766
5001001002525
Location: Texas
LRQHS - 2014-07-08 1:31 PM
texas taz - 2014-07-08 1:18 PM
LRQHS - 2014-07-08 1:09 PM
 The Cemetary Story

 


So, my new boyfriend is really country. The family lives about 30 minutes away, but it's in the middle of no where and there are no stores close, there are bayous....his family reminds me of the family from Next Of Kin. I'm not lying. He's like Patrick Swayze that moved to the city. His brother had a gigantic snake in a bucket the first visit there.



So, my second visit there was this past weekend. We visit with his Mom and my dude's brother's daughter had had a miscarriage at 8 months gestation a few days before. My boyfriend had gone to the funeral. I didn't. 



They told me that the grandmother, my boyfriends Mom,  was teaching Vacation Bible School when they told her the news and their words were, "she just passed plum out and fell on the floor."



The brother has had multiple back surgeries and is on "pills" and lot's of them and is over weight. He looks rough.



So, we're leaving his Mom's house and the brother calls Bryan and asks us to stop by the Cemetary to help him (I'm thinking, "this is strange.) So, we go.



The brother is there with another dude that I'm told is a crack head. They have a large wooden box, Quick Crete, a few shovels, two large tubs and a water hose. 



So, brother tells Bryan that he wants him to supervise the Quick Crete pouring. We go over to where they are and, to my relief, there is fresh dirt where they buried the casket already. I'm assuming the funeral home did....but, I really don't know. It is next to another small grave and I later found out the other grave was the brother's infant son from years back and I assume to make the most out of the burial plot, they combined the two graves to make one normal size one.



Ok, so brother starts digging around the grave which is packed in around 4 other graves on all four sides. Brother was sweating, pale, and looked like he was about have a heart attack. All I could think was, "I do not want to have to do CPR on this dude in a graveyard when he has a heart attack." So, I told Bryan we needed to help. I brought the brother water and a cool cloth for his neck and Bryan started digging to place that wooden box over the graves to fill it in with concrete.



Now, I thought the funeral home was supposed to do that and I'm just waiting for the police to show up thinking we're robbing graves.



So, long story short. I helped keep the brother alive. I stirred Quick Crete with a crack head and smoothed the cement over these two graves to make it look like one.



Also, just to give you an idea of the scenerio I was in. The brother kept talking to the dead people when he stepped on their graves or accidently hit one with his foot. He would say, "sorry I stepped on you Lanny" and "Scarlett I didn't mean to kick you."

Needless to say, you had another adventure...... We need to all pack in the bus to go on your next one......  
I was so tempted to start answering the brother back like the dead people were answering him back......





"It's ok, Wayne! It didn't hurt when you stepped on me!" 

Man, you missed a perfect opportunity to have freaked him out.....
 
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runningk
Reg. Jan 2005
Posted 2014-07-08 4:59 PM
Subject: RE: Shipwreck Island


I'm a Cry Baby


Posts: 3780
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LRQHS - 2014-07-08 11:14 AM
texas taz - 2014-07-08 11:03 AM
LRQHS - 2014-07-07 11:27 PM
sorrel horse ranch - 2014-07-07 9:57 PM I NEED those stories LRQHS! 
Lol....I may have a new one for you tomorrow.....I assisted in a Coonass burial with Quick Crete this past weekend. I THINK IM LEGITIMATELY SCARED FOR LIFE.
Do Tell..... 
I'm not sure that I can or that it is even legal.....let's just say that my new boyfriends family lives in a place one step up from the swamp people and, while visiting, I assisted in things that I think the funeral home is supposed to do.......all I could do was grab a cement spreader and try to get that over with as quickly as possible lol.

Soooo.....  is he still your boyfriend?  Sounds like a great date! 
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sorrel horse ranch
Reg. Apr 2006
Posted 2014-07-08 5:46 PM
Subject: RE: Shipwreck Island


Military family

Angel in a Sorrel Coat


Posts: 16030
500050005000100025
Location: In a happy place
Lol!  Why is it that you always have all the fun. 
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LRQHS
Reg. Nov 2011
Posted 2014-07-08 6:02 PM
Subject: RE: Shipwreck Island


Military family

Shipwrecked and Flat Out Zapped


Posts: 16390
5000500050001000100100100252525
Location: DUMPING CATS AND PIGS IN TEXAS :)
runningk - 2014-07-08 4:59 PM

LRQHS - 2014-07-08 11:14 AM
texas taz - 2014-07-08 11:03 AM
LRQHS - 2014-07-07 11:27 PM
sorrel horse ranch - 2014-07-07 9:57 PM I NEED those stories LRQHS!Β 
Lol....I may have a new one for you tomorrow.....I assisted in a Coonass burial with Quick Crete this past weekend. I THINK IM LEGITIMATELY SCARED FOR LIFE.
Do Tell.....Β 
I'm not sure that I can or that it is even legal.....let's just say that my new boyfriends family lives in a place one step up from the swamp people and, while visiting, I assisted in things that I think the funeral home is supposed to do.......all I could do was grab a cement spreader and try to get that over with as quickly as possible lol.

Soooo..... Β is he still your boyfriend? Β Sounds like a great date!Β 

Yes, Im keeping him for now lol. He cleans the house and does all the chores.....PLUS he is an amazing fence builder!
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