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 Elite Veteran
Posts: 999
  
Location: Sunny So Cal | Try giving him some calming powder and calming cookies. My friend gives it to her dog for seperation anxiety. I don't see why it wouldn't work in this situation. You would give a tsp of the calming powder in the food. I also like the comment about him feeding the dog everyday. And if you can get a behavior trainer that should help as well. Good luck!
edited because my spelling errors were driving me nuts. I can't handle it when I don't make sense. oh well 
Edited by Cowgirl Kat 2015-04-22 1:24 PM
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Hungarian Midget Woman
 
Location: Midwest | Just give it time.
When you aren't there, I'd tell him to ignore the dog as much as possible. That way he hopefully won't get as upset. |
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 Elite Veteran
Posts: 1182
Location: Do I hear Banjos? |
They need more time to adjust to one another. Have the boyfriend feed him as others have suggested. Have him drop a treat to the dog randomly. He can talk in a soothing voice but maybe not pressure the dog or try to hold/pet it unless it comes to him. If you have a tile or non carpeted area/room/hall that you can confine him to with a baby gate when you aren't home...putting puppy pads down...that may prevent carpet damage.
They need more time and he will have to be more patient. Making the little guy live mostly outdoors will not solve the problem. If anything it will cause the dog even more stress and upset. Relationships require compromise...time to start learning that now I guess.
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Elite Veteran
Posts: 1182
Location: Do I hear Banjos? | One other thing...you said the Boyfriend doesn't like the dog. Trust me...the dog KNOWS that the guy doesn't like him. That is not helping! The boyfriend needs to really be more compassionate here and not take the dog's behavior towards him personally. The dog is scared. He will have to change his attitude towards the dog for the dog to grow to trust him. Hopefully the boyfriend can do that but some men just get an attitude/ego about catering to an animal's needs. I hope that's not the case here.
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Expert
Posts: 1561
| Do you have any archery equipment handy? |
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  Friendly horse swapper
Posts: 4122
Location: Buffalo, TX | blccwgl55 - 2015-04-22 1:09 PM Hell he's like this with my guy friends and any other young males he's met (at work, in public, vets) it's not a matter of bein single in my case. I'd probably have to be a lesbian if anything and that ain't happenin. Lol
LOL...I hear ya, but this little dog didn't like women or kids either, and he did finally break over and changed, but like I said, it took over a year...I really though it would never happen...give it time....this is him....friendly little guy...
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 Firecracker Dog Lover
Posts: 3175
| Itsme - 2015-04-22 11:48 AM Do you have any archery equipment handy?
Does being a jackwagon come naturally or is it practiced? |
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 Expert
Posts: 3815
Location: The best kept secret in TX | brlraceaddict - 2015-04-22 1:51 PM Itsme - 2015-04-22 11:48 AM Do you have any archery equipment handy? Does being a jackwagon come naturally or is it practiced?
I don't understand this comment?... What does archery equipment have to do with a dog and a boyfriend who don't get along?...
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 Ms. Marine
Posts: 4641
Location: Texas | Make sure when your SO is with you, you're giving your pup plenty of attention as well. I think it could be a similar situation as when a couple have a baby and the dog gets pushed aside, not intentionally but for obvious reasons. He could be feeling abandoned somewhat. It's just going to take time. |
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 A Somebody to Everybody
Posts: 41354
Location: Under The Big Sky Of Texas | Cindy Hamilton - 2015-04-22 1:50 PM blccwgl55 - 2015-04-22 1:09 PM Hell he's like this with my guy friends and any other young males he's met (at work, in public, vets) it's not a matter of bein single in my case. I'd probably have to be a lesbian if anything and that ain't happenin. Lol LOL...I hear ya, but this little dog didn't like women or kids either, and he did finally break over and changed, but like I said, it took over a year...I really though it would never happen...give it time....this is him....friendly little guy...
Awww what a sweet face, LOL
So happy that you didnt give up on him and I'm betting he loves you now.  |
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The Advice Guru
Posts: 6419
| I don't think drugs are the answer for the dog.
Sadly it sounds like your SO is trying to make you choose.
I would suggest to SO to take the dog to a weekend obedience course for beginners and work up to advanced. If SO refuses to do so you know he is trying to control you and the dog is just an excuse.
One other question have you asked SO outright if he even likes dogs? |
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A Somebody to Everybody
Posts: 41354
Location: Under The Big Sky Of Texas | If your dog dont like someone thats a red flag for me, Sorry I trust my dogs instinct they have never been wrong. |
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Firecracker Dog Lover
Posts: 3175
| IRunOnFaith - 2015-04-22 1:09 PM brlraceaddict - 2015-04-22 1:51 PM Itsme - 2015-04-22 11:48 AM Do you have any archery equipment handy? Does being a jackwagon come naturally or is it practiced? I don't understand this comment?... What does archery equipment have to do with a dog and a boyfriend who don't get along?...
You have to read Itsme's comments on the other thread about stupid FB posts and then you will understand. I really should not have dignified its' statement with a response but I simply could not help myself in this instance. |
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Friendly horse swapper
Posts: 4122
Location: Buffalo, TX | Southtxponygirl - 2015-04-22 3:16 PM Cindy Hamilton - 2015-04-22 1:50 PM blccwgl55 - 2015-04-22 1:09 PM Hell he's like this with my guy friends and any other young males he's met (at work, in public, vets) it's not a matter of bein single in my case. I'd probably have to be a lesbian if anything and that ain't happenin. Lol LOL...I hear ya, but this little dog didn't like women or kids either, and he did finally break over and changed, but like I said, it took over a year...I really though it would never happen...give it time....this is him....friendly little guy...
So happy that you didnt give up on him and I'm betting he loves you now.
No, I never gave up on him...I took that picture over a year ago as I was reaching for him because he growled and snapped at me every time....I can pick him up now and he gives kisses and wants to follow me around, so he made a complete turn around, and I like to think he does love me now...lol....I'm glad this picture is in his past, so anything is possible with time, love, and effort... |
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 Accident Prone
Posts: 22277
Location: 100 miles from Nowhere, AR | Southtxponygirl - 2015-04-22 3:34 PM If your dog dont like someone thats a red flag for me, Sorry I trust my dogs instinct they have never been wrong.
Most dogs are really good judges of character. Some have been traumatized or have the type personality that clouds their judgement, so this doesn't always hold true. You have to know your dog. If I had listened to mine like I know I should have, I wouldn't have married my first husband because she hated him at first sight. My real husband she liked the instant she met him. We still had issues when he moved in tho because while she liked him, she didn't respect him as being anything to her. We had to work at that, and she never did really get there. She was MINE and no one else's to the day she died. And then my sister's dog had to go live with our mom when she got married because the poor thing was terrified of loud noises and my BIL is a naturally loud person. She spent all her time hiding when he was around. |
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 Chicken Chick
Posts: 3562
Location: Texas | Three 4 Luck - 2015-04-22 3:52 PM Southtxponygirl - 2015-04-22 3:34 PM If your dog dont like someone thats a red flag for me, Sorry I trust my dogs instinct they have never been wrong. Most dogs are really good judges of character. Some have been traumatized or have the type personality that clouds their judgement, so this doesn't always hold true. You have to know your dog. If I had listened to mine like I know I should have, I wouldn't have married my first husband because she hated him at first sight. My real husband she liked the instant she met him. We still had issues when he moved in tho because while she liked him, she didn't respect him as being anything to her. We had to work at that, and she never did really get there. She was MINE and no one else's to the day she died. And then my sister's dog had to go live with our mom when she got married because the poor thing was terrified of loud noises and my BIL is a naturally loud person. She spent all her time hiding when he was around.
Edited by pinx05 2015-04-23 12:04 AM
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 Expert
Posts: 1304
| Thank you for all of the positive responses! I hope the connection between archery equipment and my dog was a twisted joke and wasn't serious..I'll brush it off regardless. I'm so happy to hear all of the success stories and the advice that I simply just haven't thought about yet! I wouldn't normally turn to medication, because I don't for myself, but I know my dog and seeing the change it had for my grandmother's Daisy Duke I'm really wanting to try it. He's scared of everything and shakes a lot, even with me, and I just want him to feel at ease and calm. I'm not opposed to a prescription if it makes him feel better. I'm going to look into those calming cookies as well! I talked to my SO last night and told him how important to me it was to work on their relationship and he was on board. Some things that will be implemented are him not getting him out of the kennel when I'm not there but talking nice to him and giving him a treat through the door every time he comes over, us both petting him more and paying more attention when he's over, me getting a spray bottle for discipline (which works for him) because raising our voices when he misbehaves just makes things worse, he has a vet appt today and I'm going to talk to the vet and see what we can do for him (the medicine my grandmother has only runs at $8/month), we're also going to take him to the dog park and on walks together when we have time, and I also told him to see the positive in my dog so that it translates to him and he won't feel worse so it'll improve his attitude. We're workin on it! |
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I just read the headlines
Posts: 4483
| You might look into therapeutic grade essential oils to diffuse in the room while you and your boyfriend are with your dog. They are really nice for anxiety and fear issues and if your boyfriend is trying to hard to make friends with your pup, then it will relax him too. Just a thought. Your little dog is lucky you and your SO are serious about being a family together. Keep us updated and I hope whatever you decide to do works! |
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Chicken Chick
Posts: 3562
Location: Texas | blccwgl55 - 2015-04-23 9:23 AM Thank you for all of the positive responses! I hope the connection between archery equipment and my dog was a twisted joke and wasn't serious..I'll brush it off regardless. I'm so happy to hear all of the success stories and the advice that I simply just haven't thought about yet! I wouldn't normally turn to medication, because I don't for myself, but I know my dog and seeing the change it had for my grandmother's Daisy Duke I'm really wanting to try it. He's scared of everything and shakes a lot, even with me, and I just want him to feel at ease and calm. I'm not opposed to a prescription if it makes him feel better. I'm going to look into those calming cookies as well! I talked to my SO last night and told him how important to me it was to work on their relationship and he was on board. Some things that will be implemented are him not getting him out of the kennel when I'm not there but talking nice to him and giving him a treat through the door every time he comes over, us both petting him more and paying more attention when he's over, me getting a spray bottle for discipline (which works for him) because raising our voices when he misbehaves just makes things worse, he has a vet appt today and I'm going to talk to the vet and see what we can do for him (the medicine my grandmother has only runs at $8/month), we're also going to take him to the dog park and on walks together when we have time, and I also told him to see the positive in my dog so that it translates to him and he won't feel worse so it'll improve his attitude. We're workin on it!
I would just have your boyfriend ignore the dog. That is what my husband does with my dogs and they all get along swell lol. He doesn't have to mess with them, they don't beg him to pet them, they don't stare at him when they need to go potty lol. They don't sleep and fart all night on his side of the bed lol. |
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 Expert
Posts: 3782
Location: Gainesville, TX | I think you have gotten some great advice. Use your crate training more efficiently. Definitely get some help with the trainer. Have the boyfriend be more interactive. If he works with the dog maybe on some tricks or something and starts to see him as 'source of food and love' he will probably get better. It takes time. That said. My sister has some small dogs that do great outside for a good portion of the day. They bring them inside at night and put them in their crates. They all have long hair though. I'm not sure if your dog does or not. So long as you have a yard of some type, I really don't see the issue. I'm not sure another dog would help though. I would think that just might be one more distraction for what sounds like a sensitive animal anyway. |
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