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 A Somebody to Everybody
Posts: 41354
   
Location: Under The Big Sky Of Texas | mtcanchazer - 2016-11-21 8:23 PM I'm happy single. Sometimes I'd like to find a relationship, but I don't want the wrong relationship, so I'm waiting to find the right guy. I've had a couple of relationships, but nothing that ever got really serious. Life is pretty simple and happy this way, and I get to devote most of my free time to my horses and my interests, and I like that. I keep myself really busy, so I sometimes wonder when I would have time for a relationship! LOL. I also have some horse goals I want to accomplish and I want to stay on track with those, and I won't let anyone come between me and my horses or me and my family But this way I can do and have pretty much what I want without anyone's co-approval, and I'm good with that! 
Mostly what I don't like is people (mostly older) who ask if I have a boyfriend/husband, and when I say that I don't, they wonder why and ask questions...and I'm tired of thinking up answers.  I'd like to think up a really good answer for those select few who think its their business whether or not I have an SO and why I don't.
Just tell the nosey ones that you are happy being who you are now and your just not ready. When the right one comes along you will know it.   | |
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| I've been single for quite a few years, never married but was in a LT relationship for 13 years. Ended it when I was 31. I am very indepent and like some else said, I'll never rely on anyone but me. I am seeing someone who is the niest guy I've ever met. We live a ways apart so it likley won't ever be more than it is now. Neither of us is willing to move due to our jobs. I'm ok with it that way. I also don't want to financially risk starting over. I can still do my stuff and we travel and I do see him when I have a long weekend. I'm ok never being married. It is nice to have someone to travel with, but I also have a lot of friends and am in grad school full time plus working my day job. We have a ton in common and similar values. Our second date was to the target shooting range. Lol I don't have extended family other than my dad (who lives 900 miles away), so it will be nice to have someone to spend the holidays with this year rather than working on stuff around my house. It's nice when we recogize our value as a person and not be with someone who brings us down in the name of being afraid to be alone. My life has never been better. | |
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 Total Germophobe
Posts: 6437
Location: Montana | Everyone (jbhoot, runnin hard, Southtxponygirl) you all have had good answers for nosey folks. I'm not bemoaning the question I just sometimes run out of answers! LOL. | |
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 Shoot Yeah
Posts: 4273
Location: Where you need a paddle... Oregon! | I'm 46. Was married for 16 years. Married for all the wrong reasons. I wasn't in love with him, but everyone told me that I was too picky and that I would eventually grow to love him. I had a 9 year old daughter and he didn't spook at that. He was ready to settle down within months and I went with it. We have a 14 year old son. I've been single about 2 years now. I often wonder why nobody tries to set me up with someone they know. lol.... I'm still young, I have a good (albeit doesn't pay well) job for the school district, I am smart, funny, strong, fit, and very capable. I live in a small town and I guess there's not much for a dating pool around here, either. For the most part I am okay with being single. I love that I have tons of freedom and can make choices on my own. Sometimes I'd like to dress up and go somewhere, though. Dinner, a movie, a concert, a walk.... I pictured myself at this age with a house full of family at the Holidays and traveling. Instead I live paycheck to paycheck and have still never been on a vacation or in an airplane. The divorce was totally on me. I couldn't live another day with someone that I didn't even like. He became engaged shortly after we split up, she broke up with him, then he was engaged and married to someone else within 4 or 5 months. All that goes to show that he never did love me for who I was, for my heart, my strength, my work ethic, or my smile - he just wanted someone to be with. And I need more than that. So now I work around my house in every spare moment. I'm handy and I'm project oriented. I love to have something to do and I will figure out how to get the job done. I had to give up all the luxuries that came with the marriage - the large house with a barn and acreage, living quarters trailer, dually pickup, extra money in the account. I can barely pay my living expenses now, but I sure as hell never have to crawl into bed at night with a man who makes my skin crawl and that's worth more to me than any money in the bank. | |
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 Thread Killer
Posts: 7543
| *raises hand*
I'm independent with a good job, a nice little apartment currently, and soon (I hope!) I'll have my first house.
I couldn't imagine sharing my space with anyone. lol. I enjoy the solitude for the most part. Sometimes I do get a little sad, but a quick visit with friends or family and watching their dynamics makes me feel ok again. Or I just go shopping and people watch. LOL
Edited by Just Plain Lucky 2016-11-22 8:24 AM
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"Heck's Coming With Me"
Posts: 10794
Location: Kansas | When asked why you're not married or in a relationship, tell them you're waiting for your significant other to get out of prison, that it shouldn't be long......five to ten, maybe sooner if good behavior factors in (which isn't likely).
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Location: Not Where I Want to Be | this thread is depressing
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"Heck's Coming With Me"
Posts: 10794
Location: Kansas | 1DSoon - 2016-11-22 7:23 AM this thread is depressing
Why?
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  Independent Cuss
Posts: 3977
Location: Dearing, GA | I like being single. I don't have anyone to answer to but my horse and myself. I date casually, but ideally I want someone who is okay with not seeing me everyday. I was with a man for 4 years, and I really thought I was going to marry him, but he had a problem with the horses and my commitment to them. I chose the horses! I'll echo what everyone else has said- I'd rather be alone than wishing I was.
I'm so young still, but at this point in my life, I still hope to be married one day with lots of four legged babies running around! I'm not so interested in human babies, haha. | |
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 Fred
Location: LEFPD | Same here! Was married for 1 year and got married for all the wrong reasons. I am learning to be happy alone. | |
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Location: Not Where I Want to Be | Frodo - 2016-11-22 9:43 AM 1DSoon - 2016-11-22 7:23 AM this thread is depressing Why?
not in a bad way.
It's just that I think that as humans we were genetically predispostioined to cohabitate.
So, for those that haven't found that partner, it sort of seems like it's sad to me.
Just an observation.
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 Dog Rescue Hero
Posts: 1660
Location: Oklahoma City OK | SilverCanChaser - 2016-11-21 7:57 PM Im 65 and single for the last 30 years - in looking back I know I didnt really know myself or love myself and so i settled just to be with someone. Id still like to be married but he will have to love raising barrel babies, have a desire to go to NFR, like to dance, enjoy TVG and want to see the K Derby and All American, be a good hand and able to start colts for me, like to dance, not be a smoker, enjoy wine with dinner, not be too old or too young, grown independent kids, own his ranch, - and most importantly Love the Lord! So ok it will take a miracle but why marry someone who isnt going to add to your life or want to do the things you like to do? Better to stay single.
This is it! I'm 62, never been married...more because I never wanted to divorce than anything. I love my independence and ability to be able to do whatever I want, whenever I want and not have to coincide my schedule with anyone else's. I have the best of both worlds...I have a "boyfriend" - in another town...we talk every night and see each other on weekends. We used to live together...that didn't work out, I moved out, now life is great for both of us. "Coupling" is VERY hard and I'm pretty lazy. I don't want to work that hard! ;-) With that being said, if you find a couple of the guys you just described, send one my way! | |
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Thread Killer
Posts: 7543
| 1DSoon - 2016-11-22 10:20 AM
Frodo - 2016-11-22 9:43 AM 1DSoon - 2016-11-22 7:23 AM this thread is depressing Why?
It's just that I think that as humans we were genetically predispostioined to cohabitate.
So, for those that haven't found that partner, it sort of seems like it's sad to me.
Just an observation.
It depends on perspective, I think. People find happiness in different things.
Not sure I agree completely about cohabitation, but I DO agree that in general human beings need social interaction (this coming from an introvert). I have a good family and a few good friends and don't feel like there's anything missing. Sure, if the right person comes along, great. But honestly, I couldn't imagine another person living with me right now. It makes my skin crawl to think of it. | |
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 BHW Resident Surgeon
Posts: 25351
Location: Bastrop, Texas | Just Plain Lucky - 2016-11-22 11:05 AM
1DSoon - 2016-11-22 10:20 AM
Frodo - 2016-11-22 9:43 AM 1DSoon - 2016-11-22 7:23 AM this thread is depressing Why?
It's just that I think that as humans we were genetically predispostioined to cohabitate.
So, for those that haven't found that partner, it sort of seems like it's sad to me.
Just an observation.
It depends on perspective, I think. People find happiness in different things.
Not sure I agree completely about cohabitation, but I DO agree that in general human beings need social interaction (this coming from an introvert ). I have a good family and a few good friends and don't feel like there's anything missing. Sure, if the right person comes along, great. But honestly, I couldn't imagine another person living with me right now. It makes my skin crawl to think of it.
You sound like a lot of fun. | |
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BHW Resident Surgeon
Posts: 25351
Location: Bastrop, Texas | (Just giving you a hard time, Just Plain Lucky!) | |
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Total Germophobe
Posts: 6437
Location: Montana | Frodo - 2016-11-22 5:08 AM When asked why you're not married or in a relationship, tell them you're waiting for your significant other to get out of prison, that it shouldn't be long......five to ten, maybe sooner if good behavior factors in (which isn't likely).
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Total Germophobe
Posts: 6437
Location: Montana | 1DSoon - 2016-11-22 8:20 AM Frodo - 2016-11-22 9:43 AM 1DSoon - 2016-11-22 7:23 AM this thread is depressing Why?
It's just that I think that as humans we were genetically predispostioined to cohabitate.
So, for those that haven't found that partner, it sort of seems like it's sad to me.
Just an observation.
I agree, humans need interaction with each other, but it shouldn't be sad that we haven't found our signifcant other yet. Some of us would rather keep our high priorities and ideals, and be ready when that right man comes along rather than settle and be miserable just to have a relationship.
Plus you have to be happy with yourself first before ever being happy with someone else. Happines comes from within, not without, and while I believe it was fully intended by God from the beginning that each person should have their mate, we shouldn't try to ascribe our happiness from someone else. So, not depressing here...I'm just happy as I am, single, and if someone comes along that shares my ideals and priorities, I can be happy with him too. | |
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Location: Not Where I Want to Be | mtcanchazer - 2016-11-22 12:59 PM 1DSoon - 2016-11-22 8:20 AM Frodo - 2016-11-22 9:43 AM 1DSoon - 2016-11-22 7:23 AM this thread is depressing Why?
It's just that I think that as humans we were genetically predispostioined to cohabitate.
So, for those that haven't found that partner, it sort of seems like it's sad to me.
Just an observation.
Plus you have to be happy with yourself first before ever being happy with someone else. Happines comes from within, not without, and while I believe it was fully intended by God from the beginning that each person should have their mate, we shouldn't try to ascribe our happiness from someone else. So, not depressing here...I'm just happy as I am, single, and if someone comes along that shares my ideals and priorities, I can be happy with him too.
I never said to settle.
Never said that
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Total Germophobe
Posts: 6437
Location: Montana | 1DSoon - 2016-11-22 11:15 AM mtcanchazer - 2016-11-22 12:59 PM 1DSoon - 2016-11-22 8:20 AM Frodo - 2016-11-22 9:43 AM 1DSoon - 2016-11-22 7:23 AM this thread is depressing Why?
It's just that I think that as humans we were genetically predispostioined to cohabitate.
So, for those that haven't found that partner, it sort of seems like it's sad to me.
Just an observation.
Plus you have to be happy with yourself first before ever being happy with someone else. Happines comes from within, not without, and while I believe it was fully intended by God from the beginning that each person should have their mate, we shouldn't try to ascribe our happiness from someone else. So, not depressing here...I'm just happy as I am, single, and if someone comes along that shares my ideals and priorities, I can be happy with him too.
Never said that
Edited by mtcanchazer 2016-11-22 12:22 PM
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 Good Grief!
Posts: 6343
Location: Cap'n Joan Rotgut.....alberta | my house was a lot cleaner when i was single and i could have a peaceful nap and not have someone ask me"are you sleeping" "why are you sleeping"...im pretty sure hes 1 step away from prying my eyelids open...
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