rodeomom3 - 2017-05-17 4:46 AM

 Ugg for the other parents. Good for you!    When one of my girls was around 12 she could get very hard on her horses mouth, an issue I had been discussing with her.   At the end of the year finals her horse made a very wide turn because she was leaning and did not set him up right.  She came out just sawing away on his mouth.  I reached up and yanked her off her horse and said no second run, you are done on this horse-cost her the buckle.  Other parents thought I was over reacting, how could I cost her the buckle blah blah blah. She never yanked on a horse again. 

FLITASTIC - 2017-05-17 9:30 AM

GREAT JOB MOM!!!!!! I am a high school teacher and COACH!!!!! Unfortunately things like this need to happen!! We have some pre madonnas who play sports and think they have the teachers, parents, and coaches begging for them to play!!! Academics come first!!! The absolute best thing you can do is have your SON go to his COACH and TEAM MATES and EXPLAIN to them WHY he didn't play!! Look them in the face and say " I was warned about my grades, I did not learn from my warning and I was not allowed to play". I really wish your EX would be on board with you, and his coach. THat would fix that problem real quick. Sounds like he is going to cry to daddy and coach and make you out to be the bad guy. Hang in there!!!!! My mom warned me if I didn't ride my horses I couldnt go to the rodeo. And guess what......... I didn't go!!!!

want2chase3 - 2017-05-16 8:13 PM

I have an 8 yr old son (from previous marriage) he started playing baseball (coach pitch) my ex husband is this big time (self proclaimed ) baseball coach.. to be fair, he does give private lessons in his spare time, but anyway, he was really pushing for the boy to play... my son loves baseball so I was all about it. Well he's turned into a very arrogant little twerp! He's really gifted and can play extremely well (for an 8 yr old). The team really needs him. End of the school year, his grades started slipping, I told my ex if the boy doesn't pick up his grades there will be missed games, practices etc etc... well, he failed to make the year end advanced reading reward trip because he lied about reading the books and he failed the tests.. ex husband and I discussed this before, that if he didn't make his average, he would miss an upcoming game... well, we found put Friday he didn't make it.. my ex picked him up from school that day and he said he didn't have the heart to make him skip the next game because he was so bummed out.. that game was today.. I stupidly went along with my ex and was going to allow him to play today. ..

I drove down to pick up the kids at the bus stop and long story short, my son was having a major attitude with me... happens a lot lately! I asked him to take the trash can out of the pickup and he said no! So my younger son said he would, I said fine! Well 8yr old decided to get out and go shove my 5yr old down on the ground.. I lost it! I spanked him and told him he wasn't playing in tonight's game! My mother lives with us and I told her he wasn't going and why, she tried to talk me out of my decision I kinda blew up at her for butting in, this is my son, my choice and I'm sick of his attitude and his arrogance! He needs to learn. I don't want to raise a jerk! Then I called my ex and was met with the same resistance.. I was so upset I just burst into tears! But I put my foot down and he didn't play tonight! We got thru this evening alright, but now here come the group text messages from the coaches and other parents and I saw that my mother was in there texting too! Saying how good the boys played tonight EVEN THOUGH not everyone showed up and the team had to be shuffled around because of "someone's absence etc etc... to be honest, it really miffed me!

I'm not sure what I'm even asking, kinda just venting! I don't feel like I've made the wrong choice in suspending him from the game... honestly he should have been suspended anyway for lying about his reading, like we had discussed!

want2chase3 - 2017-05-17 10:14 AM I too wish he would be on the same page as me... his passive aggressive approach with me this morning on the phone just confirmed one of my worst fears! He will sit there and say he agrees with me and has my back, but then he threw in that maybe I should let my son go live with him and go to school out there.. ummm no.. he!! No!!! He said perhaps a change of environment will help him.. I told him no.. not happening.. he's going to learn to adjust to THIS environment. He's not some troubled kid, failing every grade, getting in fights at school, etc etc... he's an 8 yr old boy who believes he's entitled and wants everything his way. I told my ex I'm gonna be his momma and that's all there is to it! For once in his life, he didn't try to speak over me lol! He then went on and told me the only way our son would play out here next season would be if he gets to be the coach instead of those "hillbillies". Told me everything I needed to know right there... my boy isn't going anywhere until he's old enough to make his own decision. And I do love the idea of making him face his coaches and teammates today at practice and apologizing for not being at the game yesterday.

Fun2Run - 2017-05-17 10:31 AM


 I remember this father of the year several years ago. Too bad he can't get a job across the country and disappear.
I'm sorry, girl - you have your work cut out for you. The dad sets such a terrible example, you'll be playing catch up for the next 10 years.
 

want2chase3 - 2017-05-17 8:14 AM


I too wish he would be on the same page as me... his passive aggressive approach with me this morning on the phone just confirmed one of my worst fears! He will sit there and say he agrees with me and has my back, but then he threw in that maybe I should let my son go live with him and go to school out there.. ummm no.. he!! No!!! He said perhaps a change of environment will help him.. I told him no.. not happening.. he's going to learn to adjust to THIS environment. He's not some troubled kid, failing every grade, getting in fights at school, etc etc... he's an 8 yr old boy who believes he's entitled and wants everything his way. I told my ex I'm gonna be his momma and that's all there is to it! For once in his life, he didn't try to speak over me lol! He then went on and told me the only way our son would play out here next season would be if he gets to be the coach instead of those "hillbillies". Told me everything I needed to know right there... my boy isn't going anywhere until he's old enough to make his own decision. And I do love the idea of making him face his coaches and teammates today at practice and apologizing for not being at the game yesterday.

want2chase3 - 2017-05-17 10:14 AM I too wish he would be on the same page as me... his passive aggressive approach with me this morning on the phone just confirmed one of my worst fears! He will sit there and say he agrees with me and has my back, but then he threw in that maybe I should let my son go live with him and go to school out there.. ummm no.. he!! No!!! He said perhaps a change of environment will help him.. I told him no.. not happening.. he's going to learn to adjust to THIS environment. He's not some troubled kid, failing every grade, getting in fights at school, etc etc... he's an 8 yr old boy who believes he's entitled and wants everything his way. I told my ex I'm gonna be his momma and that's all there is to it! For once in his life, he didn't try to speak over me lol! He then went on and told me the only way our son would play out here next season would be if he gets to be the coach instead of those "hillbillies". Told me everything I needed to know right there... my boy isn't going anywhere until he's old enough to make his own decision. And I do love the idea of making him face his coaches and teammates today at practice and apologizing for not being at the game yesterday.

Red Raider - 2017-05-17 11:13 AM


I just want to say that I support what you are doing and acknowledge you are in a difficult situation.  That being said, you do realize you just called a guy about a problem and he did what guys usually do best = try to find solutions?  I don't see it as so much passive-aggressive behavior on his part but an end to being a "venting spot" and turning the conversation into a solution/action deal in his mind.  Most guys I know can only take so much venting before they move into that mode because they handle the stress of problems by fixing, not talking.  I'm sure this is not the first conversation on the topic and he has probably picked up some of the bad things about the situation from your rants.  His ideas are his solutions and while that doesn't mean you have to like or accept them as a course of action, just realize how much of that "passive-aggressive" altercation might not be so much that but him offering solutions from his POV.     

hoofs_in_motion - 2017-05-17 11:22 AM

My daughter is just starting out and plays t-ball......I can tell you even at 4-6 years old, some of those kids have absolutely horrible show boat attitudes and treat their teammakes like crap. Some of the parents act the same, makes me want to punch a few of those moms in the face....but gotta keep the composure lol.

I applaud you for putting your foot down, because I would have done the same.  

want2chase3 - 2017-05-16 8:13 PM

I have an 8 yr old son (from previous marriage) he started playing baseball (coach pitch) my ex husband is this big time (self proclaimed ) baseball coach.. to be fair, he does give private lessons in his spare time, but anyway, he was really pushing for the boy to play... my son loves baseball so I was all about it. Well he's turned into a very arrogant little twerp! He's really gifted and can play extremely well (for an 8 yr old). The team really needs him. End of the school year, his grades started slipping, I told my ex if the boy doesn't pick up his grades there will be missed games, practices etc etc... well, he failed to make the year end advanced reading reward trip because he lied about reading the books and he failed the tests.. ex husband and I discussed this before, that if he didn't make his average, he would miss an upcoming game... well, we found put Friday he didn't make it.. my ex picked him up from school that day and he said he didn't have the heart to make him skip the next game because he was so bummed out.. that game was today.. I stupidly went along with my ex and was going to allow him to play today. ..

I drove down to pick up the kids at the bus stop and long story short, my son was having a major attitude with me... happens a lot lately! I asked him to take the trash can out of the pickup and he said no! So my younger son said he would, I said fine! Well 8yr old decided to get out and go shove my 5yr old down on the ground.. I lost it! I spanked him and told him he wasn't playing in tonight's game! My mother lives with us and I told her he wasn't going and why, she tried to talk me out of my decision I kinda blew up at her for butting in, this is my son, my choice and I'm sick of his attitude and his arrogance! He needs to learn. I don't want to raise a jerk! Then I called my ex and was met with the same resistance.. I was so upset I just burst into tears! But I put my foot down and he didn't play tonight! We got thru this evening alright, but now here come the group text messages from the coaches and other parents and I saw that my mother was in there texting too! Saying how good the boys played tonight EVEN THOUGH not everyone showed up and the team had to be shuffled around because of "someone's absence etc etc... to be honest, it really miffed me!

I'm not sure what I'm even asking, kinda just venting! I don't feel like I've made the wrong choice in suspending him from the game... honestly he should have been suspended anyway for lying about his reading, like we had discussed!

Bear - 2017-05-17 4:30 PM

You won my vote for "Mother of the Year". You set standards and minimum expectations, and he didn't meet them, so there were consequences. He acted like a dink toward your 5 year old, and you tanned his haughty ass. I am a big believer in spankings, when called for. Make sure they hurt and leave a nice red hand mark on their ass too. I used to refer to spankings by saying they were "consequences", so my kids didn't call them spankings. When I would give one of my beloved little snots that "look" they knew they were in trouble, and they would say, "Please dad, I don't want a consequence". True story.
Anyway, I respect what you did and your parenting style. Stick to your guns.....you will not regret it and your kids will love you all the more for it, in the end.

Bear - 2017-05-17 4:30 PM You won my vote for "Mother of the Year". You set standards and minimum expectations, and he didn't meet them, so there were consequences. He acted like a dink toward your 5 year old, and you tanned his haughty ass. I am a big believer in spankings, when called for. Make sure they hurt and leave a nice red hand mark on their ass too. I used to refer to spankings by saying they were "consequences", so my kids didn't call them spankings. When I would give one of my beloved little snots that "look" they knew they were in trouble, and they would say, "Please dad, I don't want a consequence". True story. Anyway, I respect what you did and your parenting style. Stick to your guns.....you will not regret it and your kids will love you all the more for it, in the end.

want2chase3 - 2017-05-17 11:28 AM I totally understand and respect what you are saying here, but you have no idea what type of person my ex is, granted we've come a long way and are trying to co-parent as best as we can... I do not call him to rant or vent I call him when I'm making a decision about our son, especially when it comes to holding him back from a game since my ex drives an hour to be there for it. This is the man that divorced me and asked me to leave "his" house when our son was just 3 months old, same guy that told me he most likely wouldn't be spending much time with the boy because he didn't want to get too close to him because he knew ultimately I would remarry and another man would be raising him. I don't want to get too off topic here, but just giving you a little insight to this persons mentality here. Like I said, we've come a long way to try and get along and communicate when it comes to the kids, because there was a time where we couldn't be in the same room without daggers flying. My ex is extremely arrogant, pompous and narcissistic and I don't want my son to be anything like that and I've just been seeing little things here and there that have me concerned.