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Nut Case Expert
Posts: 9305
  
Location: Tulsa, Ok | I spent 40+ years working for several generations of a very difficult wealthy family. They wanted what the wanted when they wanted it --didn't care if it was impossible or unreasonable. Many, many individuals came and went in my office over the years. I survived because I early on understood that the would walk on anyone who would put up with their chit. I let them know that I was willing to take responsibility for my work and any mistakes I made. I would not however be yelled at, berated or belittled by any of them. Didn't take long to come to an understanding!! When the backslid over the years the most effective response was to start laughing and walk away from their tantrums.
There are a lot of spoiled, entitled asshats out there who behave badly because they can. |
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 BHW New Catch of the Day
Posts: 9884
 
Location: Missouri | r_beau - 2017-11-07 3:47 PM
Ugg, I would start looking for a new job.
Being a boss myself, I could NEVER imagine calling someone out in front of other employees or clients. If there is a problem with an employee, you speak to them in private with a rational head on your shoulders.
You spend the majority of your time at work. It's miserable to be miserable. No one should have to put up with that. Money is nice but your mental well-being is important too.
No doubt! After he was making a scene in front of 2 people and stormed out, 1 of the commissioners came out of his office and asked what that was all about and I said........oh I made a mistake and he's mad at me, to which the commissioner said well he better chill out or he'll be mad at you outside of the building. Which, made me feel a little better, however they are all part of the good ole boys club and I doubt very seriously if anyone will have a talk with him.
Today when he decided to accuse me of lying he at least did it in private. I doubt our working relationship can ever be repaired. It's a small town so it's going to be hard to find something unless I go in a completely different job type direction. Hate to shorten my years of retirement I have already put in. I'll have 8 years this summer in County retirement. |
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 pressure dripper
Posts: 8699
Location: the end of the rainbow | AnotherRound - 2017-11-07 12:24 PMIf your resume isn't up to date it's time to do so and post on Indeed or other sites and start looking. You are choosing to stay miserable because it is easier than getting your stuff together and making a change. I get it's hard to adjust to a change in income but you are choosing to be uncomfortable for 8+ hours a day just to be slghtly more comfortable for the few hours you get to be home. I'm not telling you to just walk out the door but I would be actively looking and applying for a different job. If it gets bad enough to walk sell off any extra vehicles, horses, etc. and be happier with less stuff and less stress. Yeah, what she said. Having worked for attorneys for almost 30 years I know exactly where you are coming from. And in empathy I too am currently struggling with an unreasonable boss. But she is an elected official & I have a really well paying county job I don't want to leave. I am still holding out hope that she will be gone by the end of next so I know I'm being a hypocrite when I advise you not to stay in miserable job. But I do feel your pain.
Edited by willrodeo4food 2017-11-07 6:11 PM
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  Sock eating dog owner
Posts: 4557
Location: Where the pavement ends and the West begins Utah | Go to the police station and file a complaint and or charges against him. Make them show up. Now you will have his undivided attention. Tell him he can speak to you as his equal or shut his loud f-n mouth. Or put a fake smile on your face and say thank you I needed that. It will never happen again and take your Hiney home. |
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10D Crack Champion
| So sorry. I have no advice. I hope you can find something else. |
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Industrial Srength Barrel Racer
Posts: 7268
| got boost? - 2017-11-07 12:43 PM
that sucks...........I'm sorry. I would never quit a job or burn a bridge I would definately look for another job.......
who can live off of un employment....................you will find something hang in there.........
THIS - I would NEVER quit a job until I had another one but I am scared to death of being broke and living in a van next to the river!
A BAD boss can make ALL the difference. I had a boss that was so awful, I would hope to hit a deer on the way to work so I wouldn't have to come in - and THAT is NOT healthy! |
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Veteran
Posts: 277
| Griz - 2017-11-08 5:52 AM
got boost? - 2017-11-07 12:43 PM
that sucks...........I'm sorry. I would never quit a job or burn a bridge I would definately look for another job.......
who can live off of un employment....................you will find something hang in there.........
THIS - I would NEVER quit a job until I had another one but I am scared to death of being broke and living in a van next to the river!
A BAD boss can make ALL the difference. I had a boss that was so awful, I would hope to hit a deer on the way to work so I wouldn't have to come in - and THAT is NOT healthy!
That is a scary thought process. I would rather live in a van down by the river than to be wishing to hit a deer on the way to work |
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Elite Veteran
Posts: 897
| I recently left a job about 2 weeks ago. I was there for about 3 years, and have been dealing with verbal sexual harassment almost daily for the 3 years from the owner of the company. I literally dreaded going to work, I cried on my lunch break, and looked for jobs daily! Finally, I had enough. I'm without a job right now, and it's been tough, but I am so happy to be out of a hostile work environment. Good luck, I know how you feel! Life is too short to be anything but happy! |
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BHW New Catch of the Day
Posts: 9884
Location: Missouri | willrodeo4food - 2017-11-07 5:58 PM AnotherRound - 2017-11-07 12:24 PMIf your resume isn't up to date it's time to do so and post on Indeed or other sites and start looking. You are choosing to stay miserable because it is easier than getting your stuff together and making a change. I get it's hard to adjust to a change in income but you are choosing to be uncomfortable for 8+ hours a day just to be slghtly more comfortable for the few hours you get to be home. I'm not telling you to just walk out the door but I would be actively looking and applying for a different job. If it gets bad enough to walk sell off any extra vehicles, horses, etc. and be happier with less stuff and less stress. Yeah, what she said. Having worked for attorneys for almost 30 years I know exactly where you are coming from. And in empathy I too am currently struggling with an unreasonable boss. But she is an elected official & I have a really well paying county job I don't want to leave. I am still holding out hope that she will be gone by the end of next so I know I'm being a hypocrite when I advise you not to stay in miserable job. But I do feel your pain.
Yes exactly this is the County Attorney that's a butt! I work at a private firm but also for the County. They pay half my salary and I too don't want to lose that pay and bene's, however, I don't think he's retiring anytime soon and he's not an elected official unfortunately. It's a package deal and while I don't really want to leave the firm, I don't want to work for the County Counselor anymore but I can't quit one and not the other.
I spent all night last night trying to figure out how I could re-invent myself and I don't even know where to start. I would love a non typical job, something not in an office. If I could just come up with a million dollar idea!  |
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 Popped
Posts: 20421
Location: LuluLand~along I64 Indiana | Tbred - 2017-11-08 9:25 AM willrodeo4food - 2017-11-07 5:58 PM AnotherRound - 2017-11-07 12:24 PMIf your resume isn't up to date it's time to do so and post on Indeed or other sites and start looking. You are choosing to stay miserable because it is easier than getting your stuff together and making a change. I get it's hard to adjust to a change in income but you are choosing to be uncomfortable for 8+ hours a day just to be slghtly more comfortable for the few hours you get to be home. I'm not telling you to just walk out the door but I would be actively looking and applying for a different job. If it gets bad enough to walk sell off any extra vehicles, horses, etc. and be happier with less stuff and less stress. Yeah, what she said. Having worked for attorneys for almost 30 years I know exactly where you are coming from. And in empathy I too am currently struggling with an unreasonable boss. But she is an elected official & I have a really well paying county job I don't want to leave. I am still holding out hope that she will be gone by the end of next so I know I'm being a hypocrite when I advise you not to stay in miserable job. But I do feel your pain.
I spent all night last night trying to figure out how I could re-invent myself and I don't even know where to start. I would love a non typical job, something not in an office. If I could just come up with a million dollar idea!
is there a title company you could go work for? with your skill set i bet you could fit in well there. |
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 Queen Bee Cat Owner
Posts: 3629
Location: Way up North | Do you have any contacts with 'headhunters'? Sometime's they can be great because they know of something or they do the leg work and find something that isn't listed, they set up the interviews and help get you in the door. My husband ended up with one of his jobs because a head hunter contacted him, he wasn't looking for a change and th ejob wasn't advertised but it kind of all fell into place and ended up being a great move for him. |
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Industrial Srength Barrel Racer
Posts: 7268
| Meep.Meep - 2017-11-08 7:05 AM
Griz - 2017-11-08 5:52 AM
got boost? - 2017-11-07 12:43 PM
that sucks...........I'm sorry. I would never quit a job or burn a bridge I would definately look for another job.......
who can live off of un employment....................you will find something hang in there.........
THIS - I would NEVER quit a job until I had another one but I am scared to death of being broke and living in a van next to the river!
A BAD boss can make ALL the difference. I had a boss that was so awful, I would hope to hit a deer on the way to work so I wouldn't have to come in - and THAT is NOT healthy!
That is a scary thought process. I would rather live in a van down by the river than to be wishing to hit a deer on the way to work
Guess I'm a psycho! |
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Member
Posts: 37
| I was going thru this just yesterday. I am a government employee, been here for over 30 years. I was so excited 5 years ago when I came to this area, thought I was going to be able to make a difference. Well the big whigs don't want us to make a difference, they just want the numbers to look good. I fight an eternal battle with doing the right thing and doing what we are told to do. But I'm to close to retirement to leave. So I just get on BHW and dream of all the pretty ponies that I want. |
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BHW New Catch of the Day
Posts: 9884
Location: Missouri | AllAroundRider - 2017-11-08 10:24 AM Do you have any contacts with 'headhunters'? Sometime's they can be great because they know of something or they do the leg work and find something that isn't listed, they set up the interviews and help get you in the door. My husband ended up with one of his jobs because a head hunter contacted him, he wasn't looking for a change and th ejob wasn't advertised but it kind of all fell into place and ended up being a great move for him.
Not sure we have head hunters in Podunk County USA , lol |
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pressure dripper
Posts: 8699
Location: the end of the rainbow | Tbred - 2017-11-08 6:25 AM
willrodeo4food - 2017-11-07 5:58 PM AnotherRound - 2017-11-07 12:24 PMIf your resume isn't up to date it's time to do so and post on Indeed or other sites and start looking. You are choosing to stay miserable because it is easier than getting your stuff together and making a change. I get it's hard to adjust to a change in income but you are choosing to be uncomfortable for 8+ hours a day just to be slghtly more comfortable for the few hours you get to be home. I'm not telling you to just walk out the door but I would be actively looking and applying for a different job. If it gets bad enough to walk sell off any extra vehicles, horses, etc. and be happier with less stuff and less stress. Yeah, what she said. Having worked for attorneys for almost 30 years I know exactly where you are coming from. And in empathy I too am currently struggling with an unreasonable boss. But she is an elected official & I have a really well paying county job I don't want to leave. I am still holding out hope that she will be gone by the end of next so I know I'm being a hypocrite when I advise you not to stay in miserable job. But I do feel your pain.
I spent all night last night trying to figure out how I could re-invent myself and I don't even know where to start. I would love a non typical job, something not in an office. If I could just come up with a million dollar idea!
Election season starts in January. I am not looking forward to the drama it will be bringing to our office. I too will be racking my brain for that million dollar idea. Or at the very least a work from home job that pays close to what I'm getting now. If I figure it out I will let you know. |
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 Neat Freak
Posts: 11216
Location: Wonderful Wyoming | I think I would move on even if you have to take less pay. I know easier said than done but you are working in a toxic envirement and toxic energy is never healthy. |
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Expert
Posts: 1409
Location: Oklahoma | I have been there! I worked for a gov. program. I was there 2 1/2 years! the first 6 months I went home crying every night! The boss would set you up for failure! and she would tell you one thing and if someone got upset she would say something completely different and say I didn't tell you that to make herself look good. I said a prayer every morning before I left for work and asked to help me to deal and made myself happy no matter what and it was really hard! There was 3 head honchos that was really shady and one of them was my boss. I stayed true to myself and never cover for them. They did a very huge shady thing that I just couldn't take anymore and I spent the last 6 months looking and waiting for a job. I got a job at a casino and in the vault. and I love it, but it was a $-3-4 cut! I had a lot of convincing the husband and told him God will take care of this and we will make it one way or another We just gotta believe! and I never looked back not once did I regret taking a lesser pay! I am happy and love my job and the people I work with! That was 3 years ago! It took awhile and we did feel the pain when I first quit but somehow bills got paid and I was still able to take care of my horses. and my husband gets to take off and go hunting when he wants. We still have to watch what we do but we both are so much happy since I left that environment! I picked the casino bc they have rules and cant be shady here lol but some people do break the rules tho so it doesn't matter where you go. Money Is not worth being miserable! I get it is scary! but if you have a relationship with God step out in faith and you will be amazed where you just might be at! I never thought I would be so much better now than then. I loved that job I just couldn't stomach the crookiness! Weird thing is actually we have more money that we did when I worked for that miserable place for more money! Go figure! That's why I believe that it is a God thing! Hugs and praying for you! |
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 Expert
Posts: 1268
Location: North of Tulsa, Oklahoma | I understand and sympathize. I, along with many others, were let go through a big lay off at the Tribe I worked for in Social Services. Unfortunately it was due to a newer Tribal Chief playing the race card against non-tribal members. I had been there 9 years and busted my rear to learn and do my job the best and was well-respected in the court system and enjoyed my job.
I took an $18K paycut and returned to teaching. Although I love my coworkers and grade level teammates, I'm often miserable. I teach in a rough school and my first graders are complete monsters. I do love these children and work LONG hours to prepare and teach to the best of my ability, but it's making me physically ill some days. I'm determined to survive this year and make certain my students are successful and growing academically. However, I am and will be job hunting!
Edited by RoanyGoodPoni 2017-11-08 10:57 PM
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Queen Bee Cat Owner
Posts: 3629
Location: Way up North | Tbred - 2017-11-08 11:08 AM AllAroundRider - 2017-11-08 10:24 AM Do you have any contacts with 'headhunters'? Sometime's they can be great because they know of something or they do the leg work and find something that isn't listed, they set up the interviews and help get you in the door. My husband ended up with one of his jobs because a head hunter contacted him, he wasn't looking for a change and th ejob wasn't advertised but it kind of all fell into place and ended up being a great move for him. Not sure we have head hunters in Podunk County USA , lol
Edited by AllAroundRider 2017-11-09 8:31 AM
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BHW New Catch of the Day
Posts: 9884
Location: Missouri | My daughter works part time at a Dairy Farm while going to school. They had an ad in this weeks paper for full time and part time work. Would I be completely insane if I left a law firm to work in a Dairy? Sweat in the summer freeze in the winter and be covered in cow poop? At the moment that sounds appealing, lol
Jeans, bibs, boots.............no skirts, heels, slacks or makeup. The cows can complain all they want and it won't hurt my feelings, lol. |
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