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Go Get Em!
Posts: 13503
   
Location: OH. IO | So many prayers for your brother!!!!horrible!!! |
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 My Heart Be Happy
Posts: 9159
 
Location: Arkansas | Many prayers for your brother and for you. I lost my leg in a car wreck when I was 17. You are right, he has a long road ahead, but his pain in the butt attitude may very well be a big asset on that road. (My momma swears my hard headedness is part of what kept me going, along with the prayer chains that were spread across the country for me.) If you think there's anything I could help with or questions you or he might want to ask, please please pm me. God bless, and again, many prayers. |
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 Take a Picture
Posts: 12838
| So sorry and prayers for all of you. My best advice is to get with the person in the hospital in charge of social services. Their job is to get all the necessary services lined up for you. Very helpful. |
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My Heart Be Happy
Posts: 9159
Location: Arkansas | Checking in to see if your brother got to go home today and how he's feeling. . . . |
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Expert
Posts: 1586
Location: west of East Texas | Thank you everyone! This is the first chance I've had to open my computer back up. He did go home last night. The last 24 hours have been the worst so far. I'm hoping this is just 'adjustment' from not being in the hospital. K thinks since he is home, he is well. His pain is tolerable but his attitude is not. K and I have never backed off from a good fight and we are making up for lost time. He got up and tried to 'go' outside at about 12:30 last night and before Dad or I could get there (Dad had dozed off in the chair right next to him and I had walked into the next room), he fell. As in soiled his pants, twisting, turning, busted his a-- fall. It took about 30 minutes before we could move him from the floor. Serious sibling talk about help needed. About 2:30am he actually told us he had to go and Dad and I helped him to the bathroom. As K and Dad were coming out, they both fell, busted Dad's head, several knuckles, and probably sprained his wrist (85yo). I get K cleaned up (he was too late, soiled pants) and back to the couch, get Dad cleaned up and back to the chair, and then set the alarm on my phone to ask K every hour after that if he needs to go. At 11:30, I'm eating a sandwich at table and hear crash. K had gotten up again without help. He's taken a fourth of the pain pills during this time so I keep waiting for him to sober up. K greatly resents being told to follow the rules. Always has and has made his life much more difficult than it needed to be. It's like trying to talk to a 2yo that smokes 3 packs a day and cusses me out when he gets furious with me. Pray for him to regain his common sense. Pray for Dad to not overdo it. Pray for me to remember my fear of prison so that I don't kill him.
?Again, thank you all for your prayers and concern. They are comforting to read.
Edited by chasendacash 2018-05-03 9:43 PM
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Go Get Em!
Posts: 13503
Location: OH. IO | So many prayers for YOU.OMGOSH,YOU HAVE YOUR HANDS FULL FOR SURE,WHAT A MESS!!!!Prayers he learns some respect for the people who have to clean up after him!!!! |
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 A Somebody to Everybody
Posts: 41354
Location: Under The Big Sky Of Texas | chasendacash - 2018-05-03 9:42 PM Thank you everyone! This is the first chance I've had to open my computer back up. He did go home last night. The last 24 hours have been the worst so far. I'm hoping this is just 'adjustment' from not being in the hospital. K thinks since he is home, he is well. His pain is tolerable but his attitude is not. K and I have never backed off from a good fight and we are making up for lost time. He got up and tried to 'go' outside at about 12:30 last night and before Dad or I could get there (Dad had dozed off in the chair right next to him and I had walked into the next room), he fell. As in soiled his pants, twisting, turning, busted his a-- fall. It took about 30 minutes before we could move him from the floor. Serious sibling talk about help needed. About 2:30am he actually told us he had to go and Dad and I helped him to the bathroom. As K and Dad were coming out, they both fell, busted Dad's head, several knuckles, and probably sprained his wrist (85yo). I get K cleaned up (he was too late, soiled pants) and back to the couch, get Dad cleaned up and back to the chair, and then set the alarm on my phone to ask K every hour after that if he needs to go. At 11:30, I'm eating a sandwich at table and hear crash. K had gotten up again without help. He's taken a fourth of the pain pills during this time so I keep waiting for him to sober up. K greatly resents being told to follow the rules. Always has and has made his life much more difficult than it needed to be. It's like trying to talk to a 2yo that smokes 3 packs a day and cusses me out when he gets furious with me. Pray for him to regain his common sense. Pray for Dad to not overdo it. Pray for me to remember my fear of prison so that I don't kill him.
?Again, thank you all for your prayers and concern. They are comforting to read.
You really need to get some help to help you with your bother and dad cant be falling like this he's going to get seriously hurt trying to help you with bother, this is so unfair for you, is there any other brothers or sister's that could help you? My heart gos out to you  |
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My Heart Be Happy
Posts: 9159
Location: Arkansas | chasendacash - 2018-05-03 9:42 PM
Thank you everyone! This is the first chance I've had to open my computer back up. He did go home last night. The last 24 hours have been the worst so far. I'm hoping this is just 'adjustment' from not being in the hospital. K thinks since he is home, he is well. His pain is tolerable but his attitude is not. K and I have never backed off from a good fight and we are making up for lost time. He got up and tried to 'go' outside at about 12:30 last night and before Dad or I could get there (Dad had dozed off in the chair right next to him and I had walked into the next room), he fell. As in soiled his pants, twisting, turning, busted his a-- fall. It took about 30 minutes before we could move him from the floor. Serious sibling talk about help needed. About 2:30am he actually told us he had to go and Dad and I helped him to the bathroom. As K and Dad were coming out, they both fell, busted Dad's head, several knuckles, and probably sprained his wrist (85yo). I get K cleaned up (he was too late, soiled pants) and back to the couch, get Dad cleaned up and back to the chair, and then set the alarm on my phone to ask K every hour after that if he needs to go. At 11:30, I'm eating a sandwich at table and hear crash. K had gotten up again without help. He's taken a fourth of the pain pills during this time so I keep waiting for him to sober up. K greatly resents being told to follow the rules. Always has and has made his life much more difficult than it needed to be. It's like trying to talk to a 2yo that smokes 3 packs a day and cusses me out when he gets furious with me. Pray for him to regain his common sense. Pray for Dad to not overdo it. Pray for me to remember my fear of prison so that I don't kill him.
?Again, thank you all for your prayers and concern. They are comforting to read.
Bless your heart, you have your hands MORE than full. And your daddy definitely doesn't need this stress and physicality at his age. Hopefully your brother will come to his senses and realize that y'all are only trying to help---and that he needs that help immensely. Keeping y'all in prayer. . . |
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Expert
Posts: 1586
Location: west of East Texas | ?No, there isn't any other family. Distant cousins but none we are really close to, geographically or otherwise. No current girlfriend, wife or children. There are a lot of friends here at the lake and several have visited but honestly, these are mostly old fishing guys and they just don't do this sort of thing. I don't know if anyone would stand up to him like I do. I banned smoking in the house after he lit the wrong end and had a torch going yet didn't even realize it. Heck, I've never been in this position before and haven't done any 'offering' to others before this. That will change when this ordeal is over! My husband and I are going to switch places soon (he's taking care of horses and daughter came home from her dad's today so now her too).
?Absolutely right my dad doesn't need this! That was the main topic of several of the fights this week! K just closed his eyes. Again, Dad is dozing in the chair but he 'naps' in his chair every evening. I'm jumping off to go lay down, setting my phone alarm of course! The last three hours have been pretty pleasant. I was able to show him how to find his recorded PBR on his new TV/Dish setup and he kind of likes me again. :) |
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My Heart Be Happy
Posts: 9159
Location: Arkansas | chasendacash - 2018-05-04 12:22 AM
?No, there isn't any other family. Distant cousins but none we are really close to, geographically or otherwise. No current girlfriend, wife or children. There are a lot of friends here at the lake and several have visited but honestly, these are mostly old fishing guys and they just don't do this sort of thing. I don't know if anyone would stand up to him like I do. I banned smoking in the house after he lit the wrong end and had a torch going yet didn't even realize it. Heck, I've never been in this position before and haven't done any 'offering' to others before this. That will change when this ordeal is over! My husband and I are going to switch places soon (he's taking care of horses and daughter came home from her dad's today so now her too).
?Absolutely right my dad doesn't need this! That was the main topic of several of the fights this week! K just closed his eyes. Again, Dad is dozing in the chair but he 'naps' in his chair every evening. I'm jumping off to go lay down, setting my phone alarm of course! The last three hours have been pretty pleasant. I was able to show him how to find his recorded PBR on his new TV/Dish setup and he kind of likes me again. :)
We're always here for you if you need to rant or let it out or whatever. You and your family have a tough situation right now
Edited by Chandler's Mom 2018-05-04 9:06 PM
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Industrial Srength Barrel Racer
Posts: 7264
| Oh Lordy! Is it possible to get a home health nurse to help? Prayers - you are going to be worn slick with all this! |
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  Roan Wonder
Location: SW MO | Prayers for both of you |
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 Member
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Location: Alabama | I know this is going to sound horrible but I just watched my mother and cousin go through this with my very hard headed, doesn't want to take medical advice, verbally evil uncle (trying to be nice). His physical problems are more extensive then your situation but the problems remain similar. They eventually had to take away his ability to make his own medical decisions. It came down to he was either going to follow the recommendations and allow people to help him at home or he goes to assisted living, which he absolutely hated. You have to firmly put your foot down and allow him to experience the consequences of his hard headedness or it will take a huge toll on you and the rest of your family. Remember that you don't have to take the punishment. |
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 Regular
Posts: 76
Location: Florida | Prayers for you, your father and brother!
Edited by YouMightWonder 2018-05-04 10:05 PM
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Take a Picture
Posts: 12838
| Continued prayers for all of you. |
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Expert
Posts: 1586
Location: west of East Texas | ?Y'all keep on with all those prayers!!!! They are working! The last 24 hours have been tolerable and what I would consider 'normal' caretaking. We haven't fought or fussed. He's announced it when he is needing to get up and we've been able to get to him in time to help. He's actually said please and thank you once or twice. I got to take a shower and leave for 2+ hours to make a major grocery run. (He's 30 minutes from a grocery store.) While I was gone, Daddy took him down to the boat launch in the car (3 blocks from his house) and they sat there for a long time. Nobody has fallen today. Nobody has gotten cussed out. Nobody soiled their pants. Thank you guys for sending those good vibes out there on our behalf.
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My Heart Be Happy
Posts: 9159
Location: Arkansas | Small steps are answered prayers! So glad you posted with good news, and we will continue to hold y'all up in His name  |
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 Expert
Posts: 1304
| Prayers for you all |
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My Heart Be Happy
Posts: 9159
Location: Arkansas | How did today go? |
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Expert
Posts: 1586
Location: west of East Texas | ?Today was the best yet. I had told everyone that today was Derby day and I'd be having the TV on that stuff from noon to 6:30. The western channel, recorded PBR, and fishing shows would have to wait! LOL! So in order to make it more interesting, I googled Kentucky Derby games and we had a horse auction with Monopoly money. In between this game and some visitors from the neighborhood, the afternoon passed fairly quickly. He got up only once during the wee hours of the morning without 'notice' but I woke up before he did anything really stupid. He was hurting more than usual during the night and I think was restless. He and Dad walked to the mailbox today, two driveways over. He's a little, wiry dude - 5'7ish, 130#, extremely active - so he's already planning on walking more of the neighborhood tomorrow. He is moving better and better around the house and porch so we aren't LEAPING to our feet and escorting him every move. This is a lake subdivision so several weekenders stopped by to visit today. He enjoys company but not constant live-ins (us, LOL).
?I laughed at one point this evening.... the TV is BLARING the western channel because they are all deaf. K is talking about me fixing his computer. B thinks K is talking about chocolate cake and is asking how big of a piece does he want? Dad says he didn't buy cookies and cream ice cream, I did (I didn't, he did), and promptly dozes off in the dining table chair. This was all at the same time. This chair is in the living room because K has a couch (where he sits/lays/sleeps) and one chair (where B sits). (I brought in a folding chair that I had in the back of my car.) And the stories being told are on repeat.....
?They have all fallen asleep. Now I can turn down the TV (not off, wakes him up), turn out most of the lights (not off, dark wakes him up) and go lay down. Prayers work! My stress level is normal for the situation and not bordering on criminal anymore. :) |
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