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 Expert
Posts: 1273
  
Location: South Dakota | SoConfused - 2015-03-06 10:34 AM First, thank you to every single one of you for responding. I appreciate your honest feedback and advice. I feel absolutely sick this morning and I just don't even know where to start. When I woke up this morning I noticed a huge hole in our wall in the wall above our bed where he obviously punched or threw something last night. I just don't even know how to start to fix this. We (obviously) don't communicate well about problems and I don't know if I've pushed him to the point where he doesn't want to try. To my defense (not that I don't deserve every word that's been said), but this little snap shot of our life is not necessarily typical. I don't usually withhold sex this much, I'd say we average 2 times a week. For whatever reason, last week passed without any, and then this week every night, he would say "Wanna have sex tonight? Nope, me either." even though I would have said yes. I took advantage of the "out" when I should have said yes anyway. But in "normal" life we get along and have fun, even if we don't spend much time together. I do get resentful that he spends so much time with his friends, and when he is with me, he purposely annoys me so that I'll tell him to go hang out with them. It's even become somewhat of a running joke when other couples ask us why I don't get mad that he doesn't spend much time at home, we say it's because he annoys me to get what he wants! This is why I say he acts like a teenage boy. He will do things like the "repeat" game where he repeats everything I say, or the "I'm not touching you" game, etc. It's annoying when little kids do it and it may be even more annoying when your husband does it. I don't want a divorce, but I don't want to live like this either. I want to love my husband and be best friends and want to spend every minute together. I just don't know how to get there.
You know sometimes you just got to hit rock bottom before you can come back up. Maybe try a marriage counselor. I feel like you are harder on yourself, which I can appreciate, but it sounds like there are things you both need to work on. | |
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  Shipwrecked and Flat Out Zapped
Posts: 16390
Location: DUMPING CATS AND PIGS IN TEXAS :) | Whiteboy - 2015-03-06 10:47 AM So the other day while my wife and I were trying to find something to watch on netflix, we stumbled across a super cheeeesy movie called "Fireproof". Watch it...together...it has a really good message that could help you guys out.
Similarly, if I feel like Bryan isn't giving me enough attention or not doing enough for me, we watch Misery together. It always works :) | |
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 That's White "Man" to You
Posts: 5515
| LRQHS - 2015-03-06 10:53 AM Whiteboy - 2015-03-06 10:47 AM So the other day while my wife and I were trying to find something to watch on netflix, we stumbled across a super cheeeesy movie called "Fireproof". Watch it...together...it has a really good message that could help you guys out. Similarly, if I feel like Bryan isn't giving me enough attention or not doing enough for me, we watch Misery together. It always works :)
Or if you are bored...you could try seven shades of whatever it is called!  | |
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 Cute Little Imp
Posts: 2747
Location: N Texas | LRQHS - 2015-03-06 10:53 AM
Whiteboy - 2015-03-06 10:47 AM So the other day while my wife and I were trying to find something to watch on netflix, we stumbled across a super cheeeesy movie called "Fireproof". Watch it...together...it has a really good message that could help you guys out.Â
Similarly, if I feel like Bryan isn't giving me enough attention or not doing enough for me, we watch Misery together. It always works :)Â
That's funny, because when my hubby and I watch movies or t.v. shows like that, we tell each other "you better watch out, that could be you!"
My hubby has a long-time friend who is in an absolutely miserable relationship. They started dating, moved in together, she got pregnant, the baby is now almost two, and he still doesn't want to marry her. None of his friends like her. Anyways, whenever my hubby hangs out with him, it really opens his eyes and makes him appreciate how good he's got it. I've come to really like his "guy time" because even when he gets frustrated with me, he quickly realizes it could be MUCH MUCH worse. | |
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 Expert
Posts: 3782
Location: Gainesville, TX | Aarrgghhhh! It is a GREAT IDEA to marry for stability. How many women get into relationships only for passion and then end up suffering through abuse or infidelity? I don't care how attracted someone is either, passion fades. Any marriage has to work to keep passion part of the picture. You DO NOT have to have physical attraction to have passion. Most of us age anyway if a marriage lasts and our physical attraction and sex drive wanes too as this happens. And yet, minus the physical attraction, people stay married all the time.
You made a good choice. He is not suffering the eternal fires of hell for having married you. He sounds like a good man that cares about you and about whom you care. What seems to be missing is just a bit more necessary mutual appreciation. And he's the type of man you can stay married too. Short term relationships and hookups are about passion; marriages are about affection, loyalty, commitment and mutual understanding, about finding someone who is your best friend and makes you better as a person, a helpmate, a partner.
There are things I find physically attractive about my husband, but honestly physically overall he's not my type. But he has beautiful eyes, he's tall, and I love his strength. I am not overwhelmingly physically attracted to my husband but I am deeply sexually attracted to my husband. He is phenomenal in bed. And we are happy. I married someone who I saw myself married to in fifty years. Physical characteristics entered into my decision almost none. I cared about his family background, whether he wanted the same things in life, whether we managed money the same way, whether he would abuse me, whether we wanted the same number of kids, whether we could have common interests and even be friends. I wanted affection and devotion, passion is a pretty cherry on top. But I can still eat a **** sundae without the cherry.
All that being said, SEX MATTERS A TON TO MEN. MEN DO NOT FEEL LOVED IF THEY DO NOT HAVE FREQUENT AND ENTHUSIASTIC SEX. YOU CANT JUST HAVE SEX; THEY MUST KNOW YOU ARE ALSO ENJOYING YOURSELF. If your sex drive is down, have more. Try new things. Meet him at the door in a whip cream bikini.
Don't always spend your life searching for the 'one you love,' by god learn to love the one you are with. Love is not an emotion; its action. Act like you love him, act like he's sexy, and he will be. The emotions will follow.
This is an easy fix. BTW, the Five Love Languages is a phenomenal book, so is Sex Begins in the Kitchen. I read books and we've had counseling when we struggled. And yes my husband can act like a big kid sometimes. He got that from his dad so I believe yours may act that way too sometimes. Make him feel loved and you won't have any problems. | |
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 Undercover Amish Mafia Member
Posts: 9991
Location: Kansas | 3canstorun - 2015-03-06 10:49 AM Whiteboy - 2015-03-06 11:47 AM So the other day while my wife and I were trying to find something to watch on netflix, we stumbled across a super cheeeesy movie called "Fireproof". Watch it...together...it has a really good message that could help you guys out. They made that movie here in town. One of the bigger churches produced it. While "cheesy" as you say, it does make a very good point.
yes it does | |
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 Accident Prone
Posts: 22277
Location: 100 miles from Nowhere, AR | oija - 2015-03-06 11:10 AM
Aarrgghhhh! It is a GREAT IDEA to marry for stability. How many women get into relationships only for passion and then end up suffering through abuse or infidelity? I don't care how attracted someone is either, passion fades. Any marriage has to work to keep passion part of the picture. You DO NOT have to have physical attraction to have passion. Most of us age anyway if a marriage lasts and our physical attraction and sex drive wanes too as this happens. And yet, minus the physical attraction, people stay married all the time.
You made a good choice. He is not suffering the eternal fires of hell for having married you. He sounds like a good man that cares about you and about whom you care. What seems to be missing is just a bit more necessary mutual appreciation. And he's the type of man you can stay married too. Short term relationships and hookups are about passion; marriages are about affection, loyalty, commitment and mutual understanding, about finding someone who is your best friend and makes you better as a person, a helpmate, a partner.
There are things I find physically attractive about my husband, but honestly physically overall he's not my type. But he has beautiful eyes, he's tall, and I love his strength. I am not overwhelmingly physically attracted to my husband but I am deeply sexually attracted to my husband. He is phenomenal in bed. And we are happy. I married someone who I saw myself married to in fifty years. Physical characteristics entered into my decision almost none. I cared about his family background, whether he wanted the same things in life, whether we managed money the same way, whether he would abuse me, whether we wanted the same number of kids, whether we could have common interests and even be friends. I wanted affection and devotion, passion is a pretty cherry on top. But I can still eat a **** sundae without the cherry.
All that being said, SEX MATTERS A TON TO MEN. MEN DO NOT FEEL LOVED IF THEY DO NOT HAVE FREQUENT AND ENTHUSIASTIC SEX. YOU CANT JUST HAVE SEX; THEY MUST KNOW YOU ARE ALSO ENJOYING YOURSELF. If your sex drive is down, have more. Try new things. Meet him at the door in a whip cream bikini.
Don't always spend your life searching for the 'one you love,' by god learn to love the one you are with. Love is not an emotion; its action. Act like you love him, act like he's sexy, and he will be. The emotions will follow.
This is an easy fix. BTW, the Five Love Languages is a phenomenal book, so is Sex Begins in the Kitchen. I read books and we've had counseling when we struggled. And yes my husband can act like a big kid sometimes. He got that from his dad so I believe yours may act that way too sometimes. Make him feel loved and you won't have any problems.
OMG, I think I love you. Quoting the whole thing because it bears repeating. | |
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Member
Posts: 8
| oija - 2015-03-06 11:10 AM
Aarrgghhhh! It is a GREAT IDEA to marry for stability. How many women get into relationships only for passion and then end up suffering through abuse or infidelity? I don't care how attracted someone is either, passion fades. Any marriage has to work to keep passion part of the picture. You DO NOT have to have physical attraction to have passion. Most of us age anyway if a marriage lasts and our physical attraction and sex drive wanes too as this happens. And yet, minus the physical attraction, people stay married all the time.
You made a good choice. He is not suffering the eternal fires of hell for having married you. He sounds like a good man that cares about you and about whom you care. What seems to be missing is just a bit more necessary mutual appreciation. And he's the type of man you can stay married too. Short term relationships and hookups are about passion; marriages are about affection, loyalty, commitment and mutual understanding, about finding someone who is your best friend and makes you better as a person, a helpmate, a partner.
There are things I find physically attractive about my husband, but honestly physically overall he's not my type. But he has beautiful eyes, he's tall, and I love his strength. I am not overwhelmingly physically attracted to my husband but I am deeply sexually attracted to my husband. He is phenomenal in bed. And we are happy. I married someone who I saw myself married to in fifty years. Physical characteristics entered into my decision almost none. I cared about his family background, whether he wanted the same things in life, whether we managed money the same way, whether he would abuse me, whether we wanted the same number of kids, whether we could have common interests and even be friends. I wanted affection and devotion, passion is a pretty cherry on top. But I can still eat a **** sundae without the cherry.
All that being said, SEX MATTERS A TON TO MEN. MEN DO NOT FEEL LOVED IF THEY DO NOT HAVE FREQUENT AND ENTHUSIASTIC SEX. YOU CANT JUST HAVE SEX; THEY MUST KNOW YOU ARE ALSO ENJOYING YOURSELF. If your sex drive is down, have more. Try new things. Meet him at the door in a whip cream bikini.
Don't always spend your life searching for the 'one you love,' by god learn to love the one you are with. Love is not an emotion; its action. Act like you love him, act like he's sexy, and he will be. The emotions will follow.
This is an easy fix. BTW, the Five Love Languages is a phenomenal book, so is Sex Begins in the Kitchen. I read books and we've had counseling when we struggled. And yes my husband can act like a big kid sometimes. He got that from his dad so I believe yours may act that way too sometimes. Make him feel loved and you won't have any problems.
You have no idea how much I needed this. Thank you. | |
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 Shelter Dog Lover
Posts: 10277
| oija - 2015-03-06 11:10 AM Aarrgghhhh! It is a GREAT IDEA to marry for stability. How many women get into relationships only for passion and then end up suffering through abuse or infidelity? I don't care how attracted someone is either, passion fades. Any marriage has to work to keep passion part of the picture. You DO NOT have to have physical attraction to have passion. Most of us age anyway if a marriage lasts and our physical attraction and sex drive wanes too as this happens. And yet, minus the physical attraction, people stay married all the time. You made a good choice. He is not suffering the eternal fires of hell for having married you. He sounds like a good man that cares about you and about whom you care. What seems to be missing is just a bit more necessary mutual appreciation. And he's the type of man you can stay married too. Short term relationships and hookups are about passion; marriages are about affection, loyalty, commitment and mutual understanding, about finding someone who is your best friend and makes you better as a person, a helpmate, a partner. There are things I find physically attractive about my husband, but honestly physically overall he's not my type. But he has beautiful eyes, he's tall, and I love his strength. I am not overwhelmingly physically attracted to my husband but I am deeply sexually attracted to my husband. He is phenomenal in bed. And we are happy. I married someone who I saw myself married to in fifty years. Physical characteristics entered into my decision almost none. I cared about his family background, whether he wanted the same things in life, whether we managed money the same way, whether he would abuse me, whether we wanted the same number of kids, whether we could have common interests and even be friends. I wanted affection and devotion, passion is a pretty cherry on top. But I can still eat a **** sundae without the cherry. All that being said, SEX MATTERS A TON TO MEN. MEN DO NOT FEEL LOVED IF THEY DO NOT HAVE FREQUENT AND ENTHUSIASTIC SEX. YOU CANT JUST HAVE SEX; THEY MUST KNOW YOU ARE ALSO ENJOYING YOURSELF. If your sex drive is down, have more. Try new things. Meet him at the door in a whip cream bikini. Don't always spend your life searching for the 'one you love,' by god learn to love the one you are with. Love is not an emotion; its action. Act like you love him, act like he's sexy, and he will be. The emotions will follow. This is an easy fix. BTW, the Five Love Languages is a phenomenal book, so is Sex Begins in the Kitchen. I read books and we've had counseling when we struggled. And yes my husband can act like a big kid sometimes. He got that from his dad so I believe yours may act that way too sometimes. Make him feel loved and you won't have any problems.
One can marry for what ever reasons they want but be prepared for what comes with that decision. If you can't do that, get out of the marriage.
My husband is definitely not a man you would describe as handsome but from the day we met to 27 years later that man still rocks my world and is the center of it. | |
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Rad Dork
Posts: 5218
Location: Oklahoma | oija - 2015-03-06 11:10 AM Aarrgghhhh! It is a GREAT IDEA to marry for stability. How many women get into relationships only for passion and then end up suffering through abuse or infidelity? I don't care how attracted someone is either, passion fades. Any marriage has to work to keep passion part of the picture. You DO NOT have to have physical attraction to have passion. Most of us age anyway if a marriage lasts and our physical attraction and sex drive wanes too as this happens. And yet, minus the physical attraction, people stay married all the time. You made a good choice. He is not suffering the eternal fires of hell for having married you. He sounds like a good man that cares about you and about whom you care. What seems to be missing is just a bit more necessary mutual appreciation. And he's the type of man you can stay married too. Short term relationships and hookups are about passion; marriages are about affection, loyalty, commitment and mutual understanding, about finding someone who is your best friend and makes you better as a person, a helpmate, a partner. There are things I find physically attractive about my husband, but honestly physically overall he's not my type. But he has beautiful eyes, he's tall, and I love his strength. I am not overwhelmingly physically attracted to my husband but I am deeply sexually attracted to my husband. He is phenomenal in bed. And we are happy. I married someone who I saw myself married to in fifty years. Physical characteristics entered into my decision almost none. I cared about his family background, whether he wanted the same things in life, whether we managed money the same way, whether he would abuse me, whether we wanted the same number of kids, whether we could have common interests and even be friends. I wanted affection and devotion, passion is a pretty cherry on top. But I can still eat a **** sundae without the cherry. All that being said, SEX MATTERS A TON TO MEN. MEN DO NOT FEEL LOVED IF THEY DO NOT HAVE FREQUENT AND ENTHUSIASTIC SEX. YOU CANT JUST HAVE SEX; THEY MUST KNOW YOU ARE ALSO ENJOYING YOURSELF. If your sex drive is down, have more. Try new things. Meet him at the door in a whip cream bikini. Don't always spend your life searching for the 'one you love,' by god learn to love the one you are with. Love is not an emotion; its action. Act like you love him, act like he's sexy, and he will be. The emotions will follow. This is an easy fix. BTW, the Five Love Languages is a phenomenal book, so is Sex Begins in the Kitchen. I read books and we've had counseling when we struggled. And yes my husband can act like a big kid sometimes. He got that from his dad so I believe yours may act that way too sometimes. Make him feel loved and you won't have any problems.
 This is how I feel about your "issues". My husband and I have been married for three years and no, the passion isn't there like I was when we started dating 7 1/2 years ago. I didn't marry him because of passion.... wait for it... I married him because he's a hard worker, will be great with kids someday, an honest man, and STABLE. I knew exactly how my life would be if I was married to him...often alone because he has work out of town, not taking vacations together, not always being his #1 priority.. but he's such a good and trustworthy man that it's beyond worth it. . I like stability. It's hard for me to have fly-by-the-seat-of-my-pants vacation because I like to know things in advance...that's just who I am. I applaud you more for marrying someone stable in their life and wanting to work on your marriage than just divorcing him and not working on your issues. IMO your marriage sounds fixable. I've been in similar shoes by way of not appreciating my husband enough, but open the doors of communication and spice things up and I think you'll be back on the right track. Good luck! | |
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The Advice Guru
Posts: 6419
| oija - 2015-03-06 11:10 AM
Aarrgghhhh! It is a GREAT IDEA to marry for stability. How many women get into relationships only for passion and then end up suffering through abuse or infidelity? I don't care how attracted someone is either, passion fades. Any marriage has to work to keep passion part of the picture. You DO NOT have to have physical attraction to have passion. Most of us age anyway if a marriage lasts and our physical attraction and sex drive wanes too as this happens. And yet, minus the physical attraction, people stay married all the time.
You made a good choice. He is not suffering the eternal fires of hell for having married you. He sounds like a good man that cares about you and about whom you care. What seems to be missing is just a bit more necessary mutual appreciation. And he's the type of man you can stay married too. Short term relationships and hookups are about passion; marriages are about affection, loyalty, commitment and mutual understanding, about finding someone who is your best friend and makes you better as a person, a helpmate, a partner.
There are things I find physically attractive about my husband, but honestly physically overall he's not my type. But he has beautiful eyes, he's tall, and I love his strength. I am not overwhelmingly physically attracted to my husband but I am deeply sexually attracted to my husband. He is phenomenal in bed. And we are happy. I married someone who I saw myself married to in fifty years. Physical characteristics entered into my decision almost none. I cared about his family background, whether he wanted the same things in life, whether we managed money the same way, whether he would abuse me, whether we wanted the same number of kids, whether we could have common interests and even be friends. I wanted affection and devotion, passion is a pretty cherry on top. But I can still eat a **** sundae without the cherry.
All that being said, SEX MATTERS A TON TO MEN. MEN DO NOT FEEL LOVED IF THEY DO NOT HAVE FREQUENT AND ENTHUSIASTIC SEX. YOU CANT JUST HAVE SEX; THEY MUST KNOW YOU ARE ALSO ENJOYING YOURSELF. If your sex drive is down, have more. Try new things. Meet him at the door in a whip cream bikini.
Don't always spend your life searching for the 'one you love,' by god learn to love the one you are with. Love is not an emotion; its action. Act like you love him, act like he's sexy, and he will be. The emotions will follow.
This is an easy fix. BTW, the Five Love Languages is a phenomenal book, so is Sex Begins in the Kitchen. I read books and we've had counseling when we struggled. And yes my husband can act like a big kid sometimes. He got that from his dad so I believe yours may act that way too sometimes. Make him feel loved and you won't have any problems.
The issue lies with only marrying for stability, and nothing else.
She doesn't know if she loves him like a brother, or a lover.
He annoys her so much she would rather be alone. From what I read him playing games is a cry for attention, and she is ignoring it, and sending him away.
The friends notice she would rather be independent then with him
Chances are he is talking with his close friends and they are telling him he is worth more then what he is getting.
As I said before the op needs to seek marriage counselling, I will add she needs to be open with her husband.
I would say she needs to tell him
She is aware that the relationship is one sided, that she hasn't been putting the work into the relationship, and she wants to save the marriage. She understands she has to work on herself first and this she is going to see a marital counsellor. She should also ask when the time comes will he be willing to go to counselling as well.
The other questions the op needs to ask, is why do you want to save the marriage, fear of the unknown, stability (financial). (We don't need to know this, but be honest with yourself)
I honestly think if the op answer is financial to wanting to save the marriage, she is definitely staying for the wrong reason.
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I just read the headlines
Posts: 4483
| Every one talks about having to work hard to make a marriage work. I just don't feel like I have had to work hard at my marriage. I married my best friend who I am attracted to in every way - emotionally, physically and spiritually. He feels the same way. I know because we talk about it from time to time. I don't worry about getting old. Why? Because we are doing it together. If something bad happens, the only person I want to talk to and soothe my fears is my husband. If I am sick in the hospital, I don't want anyone there but him until I feel better. When something funny or good happens, he is the first person I want to tell about it. Do we fight, get mad at each other? Yeah, I am the bratty one in our relationship. I have driven out in the pasture where no one can here me to scream my frustration/anger a time or two. I will never put my animals ahead of him or my kids, ever. He would not ask me to choose, either. Are we perfect? Good Lord, no. But we LIKE and LOVE each other. We forgive each other. We support each other. We are happy/sad for each other. We both were blessed with parents who have stayed together and shown us how to love each other no matter what. That is what I want every married couple to have. If you have to work hard in any aspect of your relationship, then don't get married, I guess is what I am trying to say. I don't think marriage should be the hardest thing you have ever done. | |
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 Owner of a ratting catting machine
Posts: 2258
| rodeomom3 - 2015-03-06 11:49 AM
oija - 2015-03-06 11:10 AM Aarrgghhhh! It is a GREAT IDEA to marry for stability. How many women get into relationships only for passion and then end up suffering through abuse or infidelity? I don't care how attracted someone is either, passion fades. Any marriage has to work to keep passion part of the picture. You DO NOT have to have physical attraction to have passion. Most of us age anyway if a marriage lasts and our physical attraction and sex drive wanes too as this happens. And yet, minus the physical attraction, people stay married all the time. You made a good choice. He is not suffering the eternal fires of hell for having married you. He sounds like a good man that cares about you and about whom you care. What seems to be missing is just a bit more necessary mutual appreciation. And he's the type of man you can stay married too. Short term relationships and hookups are about passion; marriages are about affection, loyalty, commitment and mutual understanding, about finding someone who is your best friend and makes you better as a person, a helpmate, a partner. There are things I find physically attractive about my husband, but honestly physically overall he's not my type. But he has beautiful eyes, he's tall, and I love his strength. I am not overwhelmingly physically attracted to my husband but I am deeply sexually attracted to my husband. He is phenomenal in bed. And we are happy. I married someone who I saw myself married to in fifty years. Physical characteristics entered into my decision almost none. I cared about his family background, whether he wanted the same things in life, whether we managed money the same way, whether he would abuse me, whether we wanted the same number of kids, whether we could have common interests and even be friends. I wanted affection and devotion, passion is a pretty cherry on top. But I can still eat a **** sundae without the cherry. All that being said, SEX MATTERS A TON TO MEN. MEN DO NOT FEEL LOVED IF THEY DO NOT HAVE FREQUENT AND ENTHUSIASTIC SEX. YOU CANT JUST HAVE SEX; THEY MUST KNOW YOU ARE ALSO ENJOYING YOURSELF. If your sex drive is down, have more. Try new things. Meet him at the door in a whip cream bikini. Don't always spend your life searching for the 'one you love,' by god learn to love the one you are with. Love is not an emotion; its action. Act like you love him, act like he's sexy, and he will be. The emotions will follow. This is an easy fix. BTW, the Five Love Languages is a phenomenal book, so is Sex Begins in the Kitchen. I read books and we've had counseling when we struggled. And yes my husband can act like a big kid sometimes. He got that from his dad so I believe yours may act that way too sometimes. Make him feel loved and you won't have any problems.
One can marry for what ever reasons they want but be prepared for what comes with that decision. Â If you can't do that, get out of the marriage.
My husband is definitely not a man you would describe as handsome but from the day we met to 27 years later that man still rocks my world and is the center of it. Â Â
Oija, that was very well thought out and written! Everyone here I agree, agree, agree with! Marrying for stability is important. You don't have to marry for the passion, but you do need to do everything you can think of to make that man feel loved, appreciated, and absolutely cherished. Little stuff that gets annoying is usually pretty changeable with a polite, well timed conversation about why something must change before you try to throttle him.
So many women don't even try to treat their men with the same thoughtfulness and cheerfulness they give a stranger on the street, but yet expect their man to fall over backwards doing right by them. You've got to pay those men, and love on them, and make them smile. They'll keep slaying dragons and bringing money home, and doing the little things you love, if you'll just make them feel as they should be-the most important person in your life.
Sometimes I get caught up in the hubbub of career and horses, and I have to go out of my way to cook dinner, call him and tell him I love him, backrubs, shoot, even asking him how his day has been and then making sure I really pay attention and ask questions are little things that are important to him.
Just please, spend some time considering what it will take to make your husband feel like the luckiest man on Earth, and do those things. It will make you feel good in return. | |
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 Hawty & Nawty
Posts: 20424
| Yes, marriage is going to require a ton of compromises but if I found out my spouse married me just because I was the stable one....I'd jump of a flipping bridge. Who wants that?
"Well, you're safe. I guess you'll do." Meanwhile...everytime a Carl's Jr commercial comes on...he's secretly foaming at the mouth.
Screw that! Give me passion or give a divorce. I can survive all by myself. I want a man to light my fire.
Of course, I am a romance author so take it for what all that is worth. LOL | |
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Accident Prone
Posts: 22277
Location: 100 miles from Nowhere, AR | RidenFly - 2015-03-06 12:35 PM Yes, marriage is going to require a ton of compromises but if I found out my spouse married me just because I was the stable one....I'd jump of a flipping bridge. Who wants that?
"Well, you're safe. I guess you'll do." Meanwhile...everytime a Carl's Jr commercial comes on...he's secretly foaming at the mouth.
Screw that! Give me passion or give a divorce. I can survive all by myself. I want a man to light my fire.
Of course, I am a romance author so take it for what all that is worth. LOL
People have different priorities, I guess. I've never understood women who leave good men because their chemistry in bed wasn't blowing things up. | |
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Hawty & Nawty
Posts: 20424
| Three 4 Luck - 2015-03-07 11:01 AM RidenFly - 2015-03-06 12:35 PM Yes, marriage is going to require a ton of compromises but if I found out my spouse married me just because I was the stable one....I'd jump of a flipping bridge. Who wants that?
"Well, you're safe. I guess you'll do." Meanwhile...everytime a Carl's Jr commercial comes on...he's secretly foaming at the mouth.
Screw that! Give me passion or give a divorce. I can survive all by myself. I want a man to light my fire.
Of course, I am a romance author so take it for what all that is worth. LOL People have different priorities, I guess. I've never understood women who leave good men because their chemistry in bed wasn't blowing things up.
I get what you're saying T4L and in a sense you're right. But if a "good man" means trustworthy, hardworking, good provider, etc.... Isn't that somehow treating this human being like a farm mule? Aren't you robbing this man of enjoying life with a woman that might appreciate those qualities plus others? I thought women these days were supposed to be liberated and able to stand on their own two feet? But my attitude changes drastically once kids are involved. Once the kiddos happen, then it's about them. | |
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 Hugs to You
Posts: 7550
Location: In The Land of Cotton | Three 4 Luck - 2015-03-06 2:01 PM RidenFly - 2015-03-06 12:35 PM Yes, marriage is going to require a ton of compromises but if I found out my spouse married me just because I was the stable one....I'd jump of a flipping bridge. Who wants that?
"Well, you're safe. I guess you'll do." Meanwhile...everytime a Carl's Jr commercial comes on...he's secretly foaming at the mouth.
Screw that! Give me passion or give a divorce. I can survive all by myself. I want a man to light my fire.
Of course, I am a romance author so take it for what all that is worth. LOL People have different priorities, I guess. I've never understood women who leave good men because their chemistry in bed wasn't blowing things up.
Or thought of a way and starting blowing it up. | |
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Accident Prone
Posts: 22277
Location: 100 miles from Nowhere, AR | 3canstorun - 2015-03-06 1:09 PM Three 4 Luck - 2015-03-06 2:01 PM RidenFly - 2015-03-06 12:35 PM Yes, marriage is going to require a ton of compromises but if I found out my spouse married me just because I was the stable one....I'd jump of a flipping bridge. Who wants that?
"Well, you're safe. I guess you'll do." Meanwhile...everytime a Carl's Jr commercial comes on...he's secretly foaming at the mouth.
Screw that! Give me passion or give a divorce. I can survive all by myself. I want a man to light my fire.
Of course, I am a romance author so take it for what all that is worth. LOL People have different priorities, I guess. I've never understood women who leave good men because their chemistry in bed wasn't blowing things up. Or thought of a way and starting blowing it up.
Haha! Yep, water that grass and you might be surprised.  | |
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 Husband Spoiler
Posts: 4151
Location: North Dakota | RidenFly - 2015-03-06 12:35 PM
Yes, marriage is going to require a ton of compromises but if I found out my spouse married me just because I was the stable one....I'd jump of a flipping bridge. Who wants that?Â
"Well, you're safe. I guess you'll do."  Meanwhile...everytime a Carl's Jr commercial comes on...he's secretly foaming at the mouth. Â
Screw that! Give me passion or give a divorce.  I can survive all by myself. I want a man to light my fire.
Of course, I am a romance author so take it for what all that is worth. LOLÂ
I agree. I would not want my husband to tell me "well you made me feel safe and I knew you wouldn't leave me so I decided you were good enough." Yes, that should be part of it but I could never imagine describing the reason I married my husband because it was the "safe choice". I married my husband because I am head over heels for him in every way! He is my best friend. He is hot as hell inside and out. I love doing everything with him all the time. We are always together. I can't keep my hands off him. He is an amazing man and husband. He works hard to provide us with a wonderful life but he will never put work first. He is supportive of my horses but I would never put them before him. He is my number one just as I am his. I guess I just could not imagine being married to someone I was not attracted to and I for sure would not want to be married to someone that did not find me attractive! Yes, the outside beauty may fade in other's eyes but I will always find my husband attractive....ALWAYS!
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 Googly Goo
Posts: 7053
| Three 4 Luck - 2015-03-06 1:19 PM 3canstorun - 2015-03-06 1:09 PM Three 4 Luck - 2015-03-06 2:01 PM RidenFly - 2015-03-06 12:35 PM Yes, marriage is going to require a ton of compromises but if I found out my spouse married me just because I was the stable one....I'd jump of a flipping bridge. Who wants that?
"Well, you're safe. I guess you'll do." Meanwhile...everytime a Carl's Jr commercial comes on...he's secretly foaming at the mouth.
Screw that! Give me passion or give a divorce. I can survive all by myself. I want a man to light my fire.
Of course, I am a romance author so take it for what all that is worth. LOL People have different priorities, I guess. I've never understood women who leave good men because their chemistry in bed wasn't blowing things up. Or thought of a way and starting blowing it up.
Edited by TXBO 2015-03-06 1:31 PM
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