Vickie - 2017-03-25 6:45 PM

If you can't find a horsey person in Cocoa, you are looking for love in all the wrong places.  Go to North Brevard Horsemans Club, or run up to Hope Arena or the little rodeos in Fellsmere.  The cowboys are all over.  Take some roping lessons from Heather Fleckinger and see who is hanging around, or go over to Brevard Farm and Ranch and hang out.  Mike has the most beautiful eyes.... For that matter, Brian is a really nice guy.

Just saying, don't settle, the guy you got sounds like a real drag on your soul.

RnRJack - 2017-03-30 7:00 AM So we worked it all out, he agreed that's he's been depressed and not feeling well lately so he made a doctors appointment (which he goes today) he admitted that he stoped taking his ADHD medication when he ran out and it made him feel horrible. He admitted to me he's depressed (baby mommma drama we deal with) and he's taken it out on me but I did leave (for a weekend) and he realized he missed me a lot blah blah so since then he has been super supportive of me going to ride, even encouraged it this and last week. I took a weekend off to spend with him and his daughter so we went about an hour away to a nice beach and then that Sunday we went fishing just the two of us and it was so nice, like it used to be. We even made a Monday night date night again, saw beauty and the beast and dinner of course. So if we keep this up we will be just fine, I know there's going to be bumps in the road but I knew something was majorly wrong and I'm glad he opened up to me finally. Relationships aren't easy but I'm willing to work at it and comprise (a little) lol, when it comes to barrel racing and balancing family life! Thanks for all of the support

Whiteboy - 2017-03-30 10:14 AM #1 rule is to never take relationship advise from a public forum.  

#2 disregard #1 and read #3

#3 decide on your priorities.  In my opinion relationships always have priority over hobbies.   

 

3canstorun - 2017-03-30 9:51 AM In all actuality though - shouldn't we pick people to spend our lives with that have similar hobbies and/or ones we/they don't oppose? 

That is what people forget and/overlook with looking for a life long partner.   

Whiteboy - 2017-03-30 10:59 AM

I think similar interest make it easier to be distracted by similar interests.  But if we were the same there would be no need for the 2nd person.  My wife really doen't like the horses, but she likes that I have something positive to focus my energy on.  But come breeding season, I'm stressed and she treatens to sell all of our horses.  On the other hand I've encouraged her to find a hobby, so that I didn't feel guilty in mine.  She has finally done that making custom wood furinture.  She loves it, I dont really care for it, but I love that she now has a passion.  I think that partners should encourage each other to grow in the things that interest them but it shouldn't be a distraction from each other.  

Whiteboy - 2017-03-30 9:14 AM

#1 rule is to never take relationship advise from a public forum.  
#2 disregard #1 and read #3
#3 decide on your priorities.  In my opinion relationships always have priority over hobbies.   
 

3canstorun - 2017-03-30 9:51 AM


In all actuality though - shouldn't we pick people to spend our lives with that have similar hobbies and/or ones we/they don't oppose? 

That is what people forget and/overlook with looking for a life long partner.   

GLP - 2017-03-30 1:08 PM I don't think so. My husband doesn't ride, but he loves his cows! He likes to go to Vegas to gamble, but I don't really like to gamble. He likes all the war movies, I would way rather read. He is a football and baseball fan. I'm not into it at all anymore. He loves to be around people, I do NOT. We have been married 32 years and I still think he hung the moon. We do have things in common, too. Our values and principles are the same and I think that is more important than having the same likes and dislikes.

Whiteboy - 2017-03-30 11:59 AM I think similar interest make it easier to be distracted by similar interests.  But if we were the same there would be no need for the 2nd person.  My wife really doen't like the horses, but she likes that I have something positive to focus my energy on.  But come breeding season, I'm stressed and she treatens to sell all of our horses.  On the other hand I've encouraged her to find a hobby, so that I didn't feel guilty in mine.  She has finally done that making custom wood furinture.  She loves it, I dont really care for it, but I love that she now has a passion.  I think that partners should encourage each other to grow in the things that interest them but it shouldn't be a distraction from each other.  

TrackinBubba - 2017-03-30 1:47 PM

 This this this. 

My wonderful sainted husband doesn't understand the horse thing. Never has. But he wants me to be happy and he supports me in every single way. It took me awhile to realize it and a couple of super uncomfortable conversations but I have a tendency to get really hyperfocused on the horses, my goals, training plans, rides, barrel races, etc. etc. etc. to the detriment of everything else and he would feel neglected and unimportant. And I never ever ever want him to feel that way. He is my number one priority on this planet and I want him to know that all the way down to his toe hairs. 

So, now, I try real hard to maintain, if not balance, at least a little bit of time doing the Good Wife thing. Fridays are standing date night. We go out to dinner, phones go in somebody's pocket, and we have actual conversation with each other.  And I very rarely go barrel racing both weekend days. Sundays are for him, even if all we do is the laundry and the grocery store. Luckily he's pretty low-maintenance but I also have to make sure that I don't go off the deep end and let my obsessions take over the best part of my life. 

GLP - 2017-03-30 2:08 PM I don't think so. My husband doesn't ride, but he loves his cows! He likes to go to Vegas to gamble, but I don't really like to gamble. He likes all the war movies, I would way rather read. He is a football and baseball fan. I'm not into it at all anymore. He loves to be around people, I do NOT. We have been married 32 years and I still think he hung the moon. We do have things in common, too. Our values and principles are the same and I think that is more important than having the same likes and dislikes.

GLP - 2017-03-30 1:08 PM I don't think so. My husband doesn't ride, but he loves his cows! He likes to go to Vegas to gamble, but I don't really like to gamble. He likes all the war movies, I would way rather read. He is a football and baseball fan. I'm not into it at all anymore. He loves to be around people, I do NOT. We have been married 32 years and I still think he hung the moon. We do have things in common, too. Our values and principles are the same and I think that is more important than having the same likes and dislikes.

3canstorun - 2017-03-30 1:57 PM


Read what I said - and/or ones that we/they don't oppose? 

I married someone who has hobbies I don't care for, but I don't oppose them.  What if he loved snakes and wanted them in the house and you were terrified?  That would be opposing his hobby. 

We need to realize that whomever we marry and/or live with is different then we are.  It's up to us to choose whether their differences are workable or not. 

IE - person smokes - you hate smoking - you don't marry them and try to change them.  You knew he smoked.  You either accept it or move on. 

Same as with people who move to the country and then don't like the smell of cow crap.  Well, you moved next door to the farm - same concept.