|
|
 Expert
Posts: 2457
  
| rodeowithjoker - 2014-12-22 12:45 PM I've dated guys who chewed and it doesn't really bother me, though it is very cool that Matt doesn't. In my experience, if they're a good guy at all, they'll stop you from kissing them when they have a dip in, and warn you before you steal their spit cup for a drink thinking its Dr Pepper LOL. I could not handle a smoker, and was VERY glad when Matt's parents both quit smoking so I never have to smell it at their house. My dad has chewed for years and I grew up around rodeos so I guess I'm just used to it. There are so many other habits that are way worse!
YUP!!! ^^
My fiance' has dipped since he was 16. Does it bother me? Naw. He's clean and conscientious about it. I wouldn't let mole hills turn into mountains. Go on a date with him and let other things, more important things, determine if you actually like him. |
|
| |
|
 Elite Veteran
Posts: 678
Location: Florida | Sorry...dealbreaker for me. I DON'T do tobacco, in ANY form. It's a disgusting habit. |
|
| |
|
 Road Rash Expert
Posts: 5501
Location: Near San Antonio, TX | kk65 - 2014-12-22 2:33 PM Sorry...dealbreaker for me. I DON'T do tobacco, in ANY form. It's a disgusting habit.
This is my thought as well. To me, smoking is horrifiically disgusting. More so than chewing tobacco. It isn't the chewing tobacco that bothers me so much, or the chew cups laying around, but more the dark teeth that most tobacco users have. Gross, gross, gross. The smell of dip... yuk. I just don't go all that. To each his own. Thankfully my husband doesn't nor never has used tobacco in any form. |
|
| |
|
  Golden Heart
Posts: 5662
Location: SD | My dad smoked and chewed for almost 50 years. I watched him slowly waste away over a span of 5 months as esophageal cancer (most likely caused by tobacco use) tried to eat him from the inside out. Tobacco killed him. It was so senseless and he realized that too late and regretted that he ever touched a cigarette clear back in the '50s. |
|
| |
|
 John Deere Green
Posts: 12272
Location: ~Kansas~ | I never would date a guy that chewed or smoked that was a HUGE deal breaker it's just nasty !!!!
I gave up drinking for my hubs :) |
|
| |
|
 Elite Veteran
Posts: 1062
Location: Probably On the Road to the Next Barrel Race! | you girls should have a set of non-negotiable deal breakers...tobacco in any form is gross, and has proven over and over again that it causes cancer. Also, your children will most likely take up the habit...can you live with that, a child or husband dying or, more likely, getting his tongue cut out becuase of cancer? I don't even understand you girls that don't set a high and deserving standard for yourself ....you'll get just what you demand and expect for yourself. Value yourself hghly enough to say no to tobacco. |
|
| |
|
Hungarian Midget Woman
Location: Midwest | CrossCreek - 2014-12-23 12:22 AM you girls should have a set of non-negotiable deal breakers...tobacco in any form is gross, and has proven over and over again that it causes cancer. Also, your children will most likely take up the habit...can you live with that, a child or husband dying or, more likely, getting his tongue cut out becuase of cancer? I don't even understand you girls that don't set a high and deserving standard for yourself ....you'll get just what you demand and expect for yourself. Value yourself hghly enough to say no to tobacco.
IME, you need to look at the WHOLE person. Sometimes great people may have a bad habit (heck, it's not like the guy is even doing something illegal here).
My father smoked for close to 30 years. As a kid, I knew he smoked, but I still to this day have never seen him smoke a cigarette. He did quit a number of years ago. Should my mom have never married my father because he smoked? She would have missed out on a wonderful, caring, and loyal man. I was never a smoker just because "my dad did it".
My husband chewed before we dated. He quit (though he slips sometimes). If I would have discounted him for that, I would have missed out on being married to a wonderful person. I have plenty of standards, but something nominal such as tobacco is just not as important to me as what type of person they are. I think in setting an absolute such as this, a person could miss out on connecting with someone wonderful.
However, if this really is something that will be a constant source of arguement, you are better off not dating the guy in the first place. |
|
| |
|
 Strong Willed Woman
Posts: 6577
Location: Prosser, WA | CrossCreek - 2014-12-22 10:22 PM
you girls should have a set of non-negotiable deal breakers...tobacco in any form is gross, and has proven over and over again that it causes cancer. Also, your children will most likely take up the habit...can you live with that, a child or husband dying or, more likely, getting his tongue cut out becuase of cancer? I don't even understand you girls that don't set a high and deserving standard for yourself ....you'll get just what you demand and expect for yourself. Value yourself hghly enough to say no to tobacco.
This post is a little silly. You can have high standards but still date a man that chews. My husband chewed when we first met. He is a great husband, father and provider for our family. He also stopped chewing almost 10 years ago. Glad I didn't walk away because he chewed tobacco. Yes it can cause cancer but it seems like if you live long enough you are probably going to get some form of cancer. So many other forms of death can take a loved one away in the blink of an eye that I wouldn't choose a person based on what may or may not kill them. |
|
| |
|
10D Crack Champion
| CrossCreek - 2014-12-23 12:22 AMyou girls should have a set of non-negotiable deal breakers...tobacco in any form is gross, and has proven over and over again that it causes cancer. Also, your children will most likely take up the habit...can you live with that, a child or husband dying or, more likely, getting his tongue cut out becuase of cancer? I don't even understand you girls that don't set a high and deserving standard for yourself ....you'll get just what you demand and expect for yourself. Value yourself hghly enough to say no to tobacco. The guy is chewing tobacco, not making meth in the garage. While it is a nasty habit that can lead to cancer, it does not make the guy a bad guy..... Just a guy with a bad habit. People have to weigh everything to see what they can and can't tolerate. There are some real jerks in the world who don't have nasty habits other than being jerks which is something they don't usually display until they get married. At least this habit is up front and in the open ahead of time. Some personality traits can be more miserable to deal with than a nasty chew cup and dirty teeth.
Edited by sodapop 2014-12-23 6:26 PM
|
|
| |
|
 Texas Tenderheart
Posts: 6715
Location: Red Raiderland | My husband and I have been together for 23 years and when I met him he dipped but after a few years he decided to quit. YAY! BUT, after 7 years of not dipping he got around some high school buddies and started again.  It seems to bother me more now then back then but it's not that big of a deal. My DH is very discreet about it and puts it on the side of his mouth not in front so you don't even notice. God forbid if I have to fish something out of the trash, I will be cussing his name!  Healthwise i wish he would quit but its his ultimate decision. Im like a lot of others on here, no way would i put up with a smoker. |
|
| |
|
 Extreme Veteran
Posts: 396
Location: Oregon | Well so much for that guy!!! Ugh.... ;( ;(
He was so nice and sweet and so funny he made me laugh a lot and so happy! We could talk for all hours of the night and had an awesome connection. He had some bad news with his dad being a jerk and needing to find a place to live and turned into a dick!!! Went from a super sweet gentleman to a total jerk treating me like s@&!!! A totally different person....wtf. Now I'm hurt because I started some feelings for him ahhhh ;(
Why do I always find the a-holes, jerks and dicks that treat me like crap?!? So tired of this and getting hurt......
And the chewing didn't seem to bother me when we hung out..
Edited by Luvmyebstang 2014-12-31 4:33 PM
|
|
| |
|
 Veteran
Posts: 187
| My husband chews....I HATE it! It's disgusting and he always has a line on his lips. His teeth are starting to look gross too. (He just turned 31) He has chewed since I met him when he was 14 and I was 12. He knows I WILL NOT kiss him if he has a dip in. He does try not to do it when me and our 3 year old are around, and he will not ask me to get him some if he is out! He did quit for a year when I first moved in with him, but he started bumming smokes off his co worker and I caught on. We finally agreed to disagree. I absolutely hate it and he knows it. That is the only thing I truely dislike about him. |
|
| |
|
 No Tune in a Bucket
Posts: 2935
Location: Texas | Luvmyebstang - 2014-12-31 4:28 PM Well so much for that guy!!! Ugh.... ;( ;( He was so nice and sweet and so funny he made me laugh a lot and so happy! We could talk for all hours of the night and had an awesome connection. He had some bad news with his dad being a jerk and needing to find a place to live and turned into a dick!!! Went from a super sweet gentleman to a total jerk treating me like s@&!!! A totally different person....wtf. Now I'm hurt because I started some feelings for him ahhhh ;( Why do I always find the a-holes, jerks and dicks that treat me like crap?!? So tired of this and getting hurt...... And the chewing didn't seem to bother me when we hung out..
Sorry it ended badly. Keep looking with an open mind and you will find that right somebody. |
|
| |
|
 Ace Ventura Pet Detective
Posts: 2411
Location: Wisconsin | DISCUSTING..enough said. Thank goodness my husband never jumped on that band wagon..however son did..must be a Army Pilot thing...and believe me he heard my thoughts loud and clear. |
|
| |
|
Extreme Veteran
Posts: 396
Location: Oregon | Yeah I apparently suck at picking the right guys for me....
Where are the nice ones!! |
|
| |
|
Go Get Em!
Posts: 13503
Location: OH. IO | I cant help but laugh that you were worried about chew when your last reply on his behavior was filthier than any tobacco use lol. You didnt kiss him with that mouth did you? LOL |
|
| |
|
Extreme Veteran
Posts: 396
Location: Oregon | No never kissed but he told me he wanted too.
I can't stop thinking of what it could've been :/ He also owes me $20 but ignores my calls...
Why won't he get out of my head?!
Edited by Luvmyebstang 2015-01-02 1:35 PM
|
|
| |
|
The Advice Guru
Posts: 6419
| Luvmyebstang - 2015-01-02 1:34 PM
No never kissed but he told me he wanted too.
I can't stop thinking of what it could've been :/ He also owes me $20 but ignores my calls...
Why won't he get out of my head?!
Let the 20.00 go
Quit calling him
Delete his number
You posting you are still trying to call him, you sound a little crazy |
|
| |
|
 Shipwrecked and Flat Out Zapped
Posts: 16390
Location: DUMPING CATS AND PIGS IN TEXAS :) | I'm getting the clingy, needy vibe again. Not being ugly, you were evaluating, critiquing this guy before you even had a date with him. I told you back then, that he would run. Back off. Learn to be less controlling and more independent. |
|
| |
|
 I Chore in Chucks
Posts: 2882
Location: MD | Luvmyebstang - 2015-01-01 5:28 AM
Yeah I apparently suck at picking the right guys for me....
Where are the nice ones!!
in the city, that's where I found mine ;) |
|
| |
Folks on-line