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Meanest Teacher!!!
Posts: 8555
    
Location: sunny california | go have a consultation with the best attorney in town even if you can't afford him. that way he can't use him. |
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  Neat Freak
Posts: 11216
Location: Wonderful Wyoming | LostAlongTheWay - 2014-05-07 7:01 PM Well he came home and I very calmly sat him down and talked to him. I was very careful not to interupt when he was talking as another BB said. Once he started talking and he saw that I was staying calm he was a little more open, not a lot though. I told him this is his one and only warning and I won't deal with this again. I don't think he believes me when I say that but that's okay. If he does this again I will show him I'm serious. I've decided to start a little savings account for me if I need it. I have a truck and a trailer big enough for all my horses but a place to stay would be the issue so a little savings account I think is in order. I'm not ready to give up but I won't do this again. If there is a next time, I will be prepared.
a nest egg never hurt anyone. I had issues in the past and during a big blow up was pretty much told he'd leave me sitting on the curb with nothing but what I was wearing. That was years ago and we worked through it and several other issues. We have 2 great kids and get along decently enough. We married at 19 (much too young in my opinion) and just celebrated 14yrs yesterday. |
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 316
| LostAlongTheWay - 2014-05-07 6:01 PM Well he came home and I very calmly sat him down and talked to him. I was very careful not to interupt when he was talking as another BB said. Once he started talking and he saw that I was staying calm he was a little more open, not a lot though. I told him this is his one and only warning and I won't deal with this again. I don't think he believes me when I say that but that's okay. If he does this again I will show him I'm serious. I've decided to start a little savings account for me if I need it. I have a truck and a trailer big enough for all my horses but a place to stay would be the issue so a little savings account I think is in order. I'm not ready to give up but I won't do this again. If there is a next time, I will be prepared. Good job on staying calm and not interrupting him. Speaking from experience...that is really hard to do when you're hurt and mad! Praying things will work out for the two of you!
Edited by GWR 2014-05-07 11:24 PM
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| As someone else said, there's not too many that have not been in a situation where they felt their world had been blown apart. Will keep you in thought and prayer--if it's meant to be, it shall be. |
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 Dr. Ruth
Posts: 9891
Location: Blissfully happy Giants fan!!! | Man, I really wish I had a recording of the sermon last night and last week. My church did two sermons on marriage. They will stream it and have it on their website. You may even be able to email them and ask for it.
www.crossbrandcowboychurch.org
I have not walked in your shoes and I cannot even imagine but I will say a prayer for you. I took two things away from the sermon that I feel is really important. First, mistakes in a marriage in today's society that are used for grounds for divorce are selfish. Instead of staying as one flesh, the spouse doing the wrong is being selfish and not staying as one with the marriage bond. Two, marriage is a marathon, not a sprint. Therefore, hard times are only a snapshot in time. The lay pastor that preached this (who also does the love and respect workshops for married couples) said one time his wife and him went through serious issues for 2 years. But they have been married for over 40 years and thus, he considers that only a snapshot in their marriage.
My prayers are with you and I sure hope things work out. |
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 Warmblood with Wings
Posts: 27846
Location: Florida.. | you both are young.. a marriage is a commitment of better or worse .. if it isnt infidility or abuse or illegal or drugs alcohol or something Id try to talk to him about it before taking advice of others that know nothing about "Your" situation..if your not happy then leave.. if you felt that was the thing to do... if your not sure Id talk to someone that knows BOTH of you and sort thru it.. not internet people that dont know you both.. without knowing the people involved personally its hard to say what to do..good luck.. |
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 A Somebody to Everybody
Posts: 41354
Location: Under The Big Sky Of Texas | Bibliafarm - 2014-05-08 1:39 PM you both are young.. a marriage is a commitment of better or worse .. if it isnt infidility or abuse or illegal or drugs alcohol or something Id try to talk to him about it before taking advice of others that know nothing about "Your" situation..if your not happy then leave.. if you felt that was the thing to do... if your not sure Id talk to someone that knows BOTH of you and sort thru it.. not internet people that dont know you both.. without knowing the people involved personally its hard to say what to do..good luck..
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 Extreme Veteran
Posts: 400
Location: the only place to live.........TEXAS | Herbie - 2014-05-07 8:54 AM Prayers for you!!! I PROMISE you that regardless of what happens and which direction you choose to go from here, that everything absolutely WILL be ok. I know it hurts and how heart breaking it is for someone you love and trust to deceive you, believe me! The one thing I told myself and my friends who have ever gone through something like this is that YOU cannot hold yourself responsible for the choices that others make. It is not your fault! These are choices HE made, and you cannot guilt yourself into believing that you are responsible for them. The only thing you can do is to make a choice to be strong, and yes I do believe it is a choice. That's not to say you won't have weak moments and that the hurt will immediately go away, but you cannot let the choices he made dictate you or how you feel about yourself. You have nothing to be embarassed about, believe me! You are not liable for his bad choices in any way!!!
The hardest part is choosing a path and not waivering in your decision. I do believe any situation is repairable if both parties want to work on things, so please don't hear me saying you should leave him......YOU are the only one who has the right and the knowledge to make those decisions. I am here for you if you need to talk. I will not ask your name or any private details you don't want to share, but I can share some stories with you as well to let you know that you aren't alone and that life does go on....and often improves drastically.
This!! |
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