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 Extreme Veteran
Posts: 306
Location: Albany, Georgia | When you give lessons, what rules do you set for them? I have a hard time with my kids being dedicated. Especially the teens??. I'm starting to realize they are a direct result of me just as a football team is to the coach and so on. IMO if I don't become more strict on them then I feel like I'm just taking their money. They will never progress unless they do their part at home. I even have trouble with some of the older ones complaining and refusing to do some of the harder exercises such as riding bareback or with no stirrups. ThOse are the ones I feel don't want to be the best they can be. This is just a battle I'm struggling with and I want others opinion. | |
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 Popped
Posts: 20421
Location: LuluLand~along I64 Indiana | lessons should be fun.... if you are stricter and driving them to do it are they having fun?
I have found the ones you can be hard on are the ones who are driven themselves. for the rest.... take the money and make it fun for them. if they learn something then you have done your job. | |
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Elite Veteran
Posts: 705
Location: Weatherford, TX | DustToDiamonds - 2015-12-30 10:55 AM When you give lessons, what rules do you set for them? I have a hard time with my kids being dedicated. Especially the teens??. I'm starting to realize they are a direct result of me just as a football team is to the coach and so on. IMO if I don't become more strict on them then I feel like I'm just taking their money. They will never progress unless they do their part at home. I even have trouble with some of the older ones complaining and refusing to do some of the harder exercises such as riding bareback or with no stirrups. ThOse are the ones I feel don't want to be the best they can be. This is just a battle I'm struggling with and I want others opinion.
I've ran into the same issue....dedication. I had just one, on my my 1D National horse that could be 1D in TX with all her mistakes. He could could win np by a mile if she cleaned up some of her mistakes. She got 'bratty' so we and her parents pulled her from the horse. We will see if she has the dedication and drive to get back on. Again, we will see. You have to let them come to you. If they are dedicated...they will come back to it and to you. | |
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Elite Veteran
Posts: 705
Location: Weatherford, TX | Gator Bug - 2015-12-30 11:08 AM DustToDiamonds - 2015-12-30 10:55 AM When you give lessons, what rules do you set for them? I have a hard time with my kids being dedicated. Especially the teens??. I'm starting to realize they are a direct result of me just as a football team is to the coach and so on. IMO if I don't become more strict on them then I feel like I'm just taking their money. They will never progress unless they do their part at home. I even have trouble with some of the older ones complaining and refusing to do some of the harder exercises such as riding bareback or with no stirrups. ThOse are the ones I feel don't want to be the best they can be. This is just a battle I'm struggling with and I want others opinion. I've ran into the same issue....dedication. I had just one, on my my 1D National horse that could be 1D in TX with all her mistakes. He could could win the 1D by a mile if she cleaned up some of her mistakes. She got 'bratty' so we and her parents pulled her from the horse. We will see if she has the dedication and drive to get back on. Again, we will see. You have to let them come to you. If they are dedicated...they will come back to it and to you.
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Extreme Veteran
Posts: 306
Location: Albany, Georgia | Yes, we play games and I always try to make it fun. I ride with them, show them the exercises, do them with them so they aren't thinking I'm making them do something I wouldn't do, and still.....I think a lot of it has to do with me being 26 yrs old and some of them are 17-18 and they see me as a "friend" instead of a instructor. | |
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Elite Veteran
Posts: 705
Location: Weatherford, TX | Gator Bug - 2015-12-30 11:10 AM Gator Bug - 2015-12-30 11:08 AM DustToDiamonds - 2015-12-30 10:55 AM When you give lessons, what rules do you set for them? I have a hard time with my kids being dedicated. Especially the teens??. I'm starting to realize they are a direct result of me just as a football team is to the coach and so on. IMO if I don't become more strict on them then I feel like I'm just taking their money. They will never progress unless they do their part at home. I even have trouble with some of the older ones complaining and refusing to do some of the harder exercises such as riding bareback or with no stirrups. ThOse are the ones I feel don't want to be the best they can be. This is just a battle I'm struggling with and I want others opinion. I've ran into the same issue....dedication. I had just one, on my 1D National horse that could be 1D ianywhere in the country and I n TX with all her mistakes. He could win the 1D anywhere by a mile if she cleaned up some of her mistakes. She got 'bratty' so we and her parents pulled her from the horse. We will see if she has the dedication and drive to get back on. Again, we will see. You have to let them come to you. If they are dedicated...they will come back to it and to you.
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Elite Veteran
Posts: 705
Location: Weatherford, TX | Gator Bug - 2015-12-30 11:14 AM Gator Bug - 2015-12-30 11:10 AM Gator Bug - 2015-12-30 11:08 AM DustToDiamonds - 2015-12-30 10:55 AM When you give lessons, what rules do you set for them? I have a hard time with my kids being dedicated. Especially the teens??. I'm starting to realize they are a direct result of me just as a football team is to the coach and so on. IMO if I don't become more strict on them then I feel like I'm just taking their money. They will never progress unless they do their part at home. I even have trouble with some of the older ones complaining and refusing to do some of the harder exercises such as riding bareback or with no stirrups. ThOse are the ones I feel don't want to be the best they can be. This is just a battle I'm struggling with and I want others opinion. I've ran into the same issue....dedication. You can't always make it 'fun' if they are to get better, especially with the horse that I had to give her and that she said she wanted to ride. I had just one student, on my 1D National horse that could be 1D ianywhere in the country and I n TX with all her mistakes. He could win the 1D anywhere by a mile if she cleaned up some of her mistakes. She got 'bratty' so we and her parents pulled her from the horse. She wouldn't clean up her mistakes so we all decided to pull her. We will see if she has the dedication and drive to get back on. Again, we will see. You have to let them come to you. If they are dedicated...they will come back to it and to you.
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The Resident Destroyer of Liberal Logic
 
Location: PNW | luluwhit - 2015-12-30 9:02 AM
lessons should be fun.... if you are stricter and driving them to do it are they having fun?
I have found the ones you can be hard on are the ones who are driven themselves. for the rest.... take the money and make it fun for them. if they learn something then you have done your job.
This. I give lessons regularly, for both barrel racing and English disciplines. I have a couple adult (much older than I am) students who just want to be told what a great job they are doing, maybe pop over a couple of fences, and be done. I also have a seven year-old who has the most natural seat I've ever seen and gets mad at me if I praise her for anything less than perfect. It's all about the students' dedication and drive. You can't teach that or force that. | |
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Elite Veteran
Posts: 705
Location: Weatherford, TX | Gator Bug - 2015-12-30 11:17 AM Gator Bug - 2015-12-30 11:14 AM Gator Bug - 2015-12-30 11:10 AM Gator Bug - 2015-12-30 11:08 AM DustToDiamonds - 2015-12-30 10:55 AM When you give lessons, what rules do you set for them? I have a hard time with my kids being dedicated. Especially the teens??. I'm starting to realize they are a direct result of me just as a football team is to the coach and so on. IMO if I don't become more strict on them then I feel like I'm just taking their money. They will never progress unless they do their part at home. I even have trouble with some of the older ones complaining and refusing to do some of the harder exercises such as riding bareback or with no stirrups. ThOse are the ones I feel don't want to be the best they can be. This is just a battle I'm struggling with and I want others opinion. I've ran into the same issue....dedication. You can't always make it 'fun' if they are to get better, especially with the horse that I had to give her and that she said she wanted to ride. I had just one student, on my 1D National horse that could be 1D ianywhere in the country and in TX with all her mistakes. He could win the 1D anywhere by a mile if she cleaned up some of her mistakes. She got 'bratty' so we and her parents pulled her from the horse. She wouldn't clean up her mistakes so we all decided to pull her. We will see if she has the dedication and drive to get back on. Again, we will see. You have to let them come to you. If they are dedicated...they will come back to it and to you.
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Elite Veteran
Posts: 705
Location: Weatherford, TX | Gator Bug - 2015-12-30 11:19 AM Gator Bug - 2015-12-30 11:17 AM Gator Bug - 2015-12-30 11:14 AM Gator Bug - 2015-12-30 11:10 AM Gator Bug - 2015-12-30 11:08 AM DustToDiamonds - 2015-12-30 10:55 AM When you give lessons, what rules do you set for them? I have a hard time with my kids being dedicated. Especially the teens??. I'm starting to realize they are a direct result of me just as a football team is to the coach and so on. IMO if I don't become more strict on them then I feel like I'm just taking their money. They will never progress unless they do their part at home. I even have trouble with some of the older ones complaining and refusing to do some of the harder exercises such as riding bareback or with no stirrups. ThOse are the ones I feel don't want to be the best they can be. This is just a battle I'm struggling with and I want others opinion. I've ran into the same issue....dedication. You can't always make it 'fun' if they are to get better, especially with the horse that I had to give her and that she said she wanted to ride. I had just one student, on my 1D National horse that could be 1D anywhere in the country and in TX with all her mistakes. He could win the 1D anywhere by a mile if she cleaned up some of her mistakes. She got 'bratty' so we and her parents pulled her from the horse. She wouldn't clean up her mistakes so we all decided to pull her. We will see if she has the dedication and drive to get back on. Again, we will see. You have to let them come to you. If they are dedicated...they will come back to it and to you.
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Elite Veteran
Posts: 705
Location: Weatherford, TX | Gator Bug - 2015-12-30 11:20 AM Gator Bug - 2015-12-30 11:19 AM Gator Bug - 2015-12-30 11:17 AM Gator Bug - 2015-12-30 11:14 AM Gator Bug - 2015-12-30 11:10 AM Gator Bug - 2015-12-30 11:08 AM DustToDiamonds - 2015-12-30 10:55 AM When you give lessons, what rules do you set for them? I have a hard time with my kids being dedicated. Especially the teens??. I'm starting to realize they are a direct result of me just as a football team is to the coach and so on. IMO if I don't become more strict on them then I feel like I'm just taking their money. They will never progress unless they do their part at home. I even have trouble with some of the older ones complaining and refusing to do some of the harder exercises such as riding bareback or with no stirrups. ThOse are the ones I feel don't want to be the best they can be. This is just a battle I'm struggling with and I want others opinion. I've ran into the same issue....dedication. You can't always make it 'fun' if they are to get better, especially with the horse that I had to give her and that she said she wanted to ride. I had just one student, on my 1D National horse that could be 1D anywhere in the country and in TX with all her mistakes. He could win the 1D anywhere by a mile if she cleaned up some of her mistakes. She got 'bratty' so we and her parents pulled her from the horse. She wouldn't clean up her mistakes so we all decided to pull her. We will see if she has the dedication and drive to get back on. Again, we will see. You have to let them come to you. If they are dedicated...they will come back to it and to you.
OMG... BHW is acting up and pasting over and over again...I can't edit or delete! Ugghhh!!! | |
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 Extreme Veteran
Posts: 434
Location: Northwest Florida | DustToDiamonds - 2015-12-30 11:13 AM
Yes, we play games and I always try to make it fun. I ride with them, show them the exercises, do them with them so they aren't thinking I'm making them do something I wouldn't do, and still.....I think a lot of it has to do with me being 26 yrs old and some of them are 17-18 and they see me as a "friend" instead of a instructor.
I had this problem when I was a 21 year old substitute teacher at a high school! lol
I used to give lessons when I was also in my early 20s, but they were only basic beginner riding lessons and I never had a student over middle school age. I did have a boy once who was about 9 years old, and he took lessons with his older sister. She was extremely dedicated and eager to learn, but the little boy was very hyper, distracted, and would rather play in the dirt for an hour! His mother noticed this too and we decided to stop forcing him to participate in the lessons. From that point on, his sister received peaceful, private lessons while the boy chased the cat and climbed the sawdust piles, lol.
I don't think I would accept a down right refusal to participate, as you said they do in situations such as no stirrup riding. There would be an agenda for the day's lesson and they would follow it, or not receive a lesson. They shouldn't get to choose what you do that day.. That's the instructor's job! | |
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 Extreme Veteran
Posts: 312
Location: KS | It look like Gator Bug was having some issues. :) No worries.
I gave lessons to a 10 year old, very into horses, but had never been around them, her mom and gma ask if I would be interested in lessons, I was riding almost everyday anyway, so I thought why not. I started from the ground up, showing her the proper way to brush, saddle, and unsaddle. We didn't do a hole lot of exercises more just trail riding, getting her use to the feel.
I would definitely say she was determined, but I could not get her to slow down, I had her on a very mellow horse, and she would kick kick kick, always wanting to run, then want to stop after just seconds. I would ride the horse after she left, just to prevent any bad behavior, but I felt like I was having to almost scold all the time, instead of teach.
Im sure it depends soley on the kids/adults, they have to want to be there to learn, and accept that there is a boss. I agree on making it fun, it I think it needs to be fun for both student and instructor. I wasn't enjoying it, so after a year I told them I had gotten to busy (which I had) I would like to do it again someday when Im set up a little better. | |
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Elite Veteran
Posts: 705
Location: Weatherford, TX | Peewee212 - 2015-12-30 11:54 AM It look like Gator Bug was having some issues. :) No worries. I gave lessons to a 10 year old, very into horses, but had never been around them, her mom and gma ask if I would be interested in lessons, I was riding almost everyday anyway, so I thought why not. I started from the ground up, showing her the proper way to brush, saddle, and unsaddle. We didn't do a hole lot of exercises more just trail riding, getting her use to the feel. I would definitely say she was determined, but I could not get her to slow down, I had her on a very mellow horse, and she would kick kick kick, always wanting to run, then want to stop after just seconds. I would ride the horse after she left, just to prevent any bad behavior, but I felt like I was having to almost scold all the time, instead of teach. Im sure it depends soley on the kids/adults, they have to want to be there to learn, and accept that there is a boss. I agree on making it fun, it I think it needs to be fun for both student and instructor. I wasn't enjoying it, so after a year I told them I had gotten to busy (which I had) I would like to do it again someday when Im set up a little better. Yes...Gator Bug had some issues! So very right! LOL My student was very naturally talented and gifted little rider. I also felt like I was 'scolding' too much without teaching and her actually learning. She and the horse are very capable of making an amazing pair together. My student was also very young and put on a very fast, high powered, very competent, knew his job type of horse. She showed everything it needed to step up to that caliber of horse. That horse can do his job without the rider doing a thing. He is older, but still in the 1D in the highest of levels and can still scare the crap out of me! :) My student can't admit she's scared of the speed and won't correct herself. She says she wants it, but isn't willing to put in the work/time to get there. I just love this kid to death and she is naturally talented, but she HAS to really want to step up that level of riding. Her parents (and I ) cannot do it for her. However, they both are getting a break and we will see if she really wants to go on in the future. :)
Edited by Gator Bug 2015-12-30 1:38 PM
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  Twin Sister to Queen Boobie
Posts: 13315
Location: East Tennessee but who knows?! | I have the luxury of not depending on lessons to make a living & I feel like my time is just as important as theirs is. I give lessons for extra $$ but I also do it because I am very passionate about horsemanship. I tell them up front, if they're there to just look pretty and have good Equitation then go somewhere else. I also tell them it's serious business because the impact that they have on their horse, any horse has lasting consequences. Yes, riding is fun but it's a responsibility to the horse and it's a priviledge. Then again, I have been called a drill seargent, lol. But I think how we approach it sets the tone. If we see at as just fun then why take it serious? If people are told they can get killed in this sport from doing things half way, and horses can lose their lives from that ttoo, then sometimes they take it more seriously and are more dedicated. Think about it - what would Ray Hunt or Buck Brannaman tell them? I have fired a couple of students and told them point blank they we're wasting my time. | |
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Elite Veteran
Posts: 705
Location: Weatherford, TX | Fairweather - 2015-12-30 1:31 PM I have the luxury of not depending on lessons to make a living & I feel like my time is just as important as theirs is. I give lessons for extra $$ but I also do it because I am very passionate about horsemanship. I tell them up front, if they're there to just look pretty and have good Equitation then go somewhere else. I also tell them it's serious business because the impact that they have on their horse, any horse has lasting consequences. Yes, riding is fun but it's a responsibility to the horse and it's a priviledge. Then again, I have been called a drill seargent, lol. But I think how we approach it sets the tone. If we see at as just fun then why take it serious? If people are told they can get killed in this sport from doing things half way, and horses can lose their lives from that ttoo, then sometimes they take it more seriously and are more dedicated. Think about it - what would Ray Hunt or Buck Brannaman tell them? I have fired a couple of students and told them point blank they we're wasting my time.
Ditto! I also feel the same way. It can be fun, but let's face it....horses are an expensive 'hobby' or 'extracurricular activity' for kids especially. It has to be taken seriously. And you're right, it is a privilege for both kids and adults to be able to compete. :) | |
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